What am I doing, damnit?

[carsonshepherd]

Yet, you live in it every day

Hahaha! So true! But it's nothing like Ellis...

 

[CharleyH]

Hahaha! So true! But it's nothing like Ellis...

PULEASE take my life, baby, come live it ... god damn fucking, hm yes fucking, wow sexy God damn meth freak . . . hm, nice body though . . . who cares.

LOL - you get the picture.

EDIT: EDIT: TO MUCH INFO

 

[carsonshepherd]

PULEASE take my life, baby, god damn fucking, hm fucking, wow sexy God damn meth freak . . . hm, nice body . . . who cares, LOL - you get the picture.

EDIT: THE CULTURE HON, that is lived, and dont tell me unless - LOL you are not in midwest America. PLEASE do not say Utah or yuk, OHIO )

Sorry I talk riddles sometimes, thinking people get me

Yes, I AM! I grew up in Illinois, and I live somewhere even WORSE! the American south! Quelle horreur! culture is car racing and college football... No beer sold before noon on Sunday and no liquor or wine sold on Sunday at all.

 

[minsue]

Sorry I talk riddles sometimes, thinking people get me

Thinking people DO get you. It's the rest of 'em that get lost along the way.

Will you stop editing after I quote?!?

Do I need to edit now?

 

[minsue]

no liquor or wine sold on Sunday at all.

!

That's...that's....Blasphemy!

 

[CharleyH]

Yes, I AM! I grew up in Illinois, and I live somewhere even WORSE! the American south! Quelle horreur! culture is car racing and college football... No beer sold before noon on Sunday and no liquor or wine sold on Sunday at all.

Damn. OK, what are you doing in la sud, garcon? POVERTY, I say, cultural deprivation! Poor soul. Bet there's a law against . . .you know ... the buttock thing

 

[carsonshepherd]

I suppose I enjoy the richness and beauty of older diction. I find it very hard to be beautiful in contemporary English.

By the way S... not true at all. Just more of a challenge. PM comng your way with example.

 

[CharleyH]

Thinking people DO get you. It's the rest of 'em that get lost along the way.

Will you stop editing after I quote?!?

Do I need to edit now?

I keep changing my mind and spelling errors

 

[CharleyH]

Yes, I AM! I grew up in Illinois, and I live somewhere even WORSE! the American south! Quelle horreur! culture is car racing and college football... No beer sold before noon on Sunday and no liquor or wine sold on Sunday at all.

I heard the first time It's a bouquet

 

[NoJo]

I understand your smileys, Charley, and that's good enough for me.

 

[minsue]

I keep changing my mind and spelling errors

*grumbles* there you go again, fixing your posts and taking all the fun out of it...


Sorry, Shanglan. No more threadjack. I'll behave now.

 

[carsonshepherd]

Damn. OK, what are you doing in la sud, garcon? POVERTY, I say, cultural deprivation! Poor soul. Bet there's a law against . . .you know ... the buttock thing

It's best not to get me started on that... I promise you I will never shut up.

 

[CharleyH]

I understand your smileys, Charley, and that's good enough for me.

I understand your AV thought bubble, but happy to see your beautiful face Joe. YUM.

 

[CharleyH]

It's best not to get me started on that... I promise you I will never shut up.

I never said I wanted you to shut up

 

[Colleen Thomas]

This is a thread for people who participated in the Voice Guessing Thread.

I have a serious question, and can take the answers like a horse.

What is it that makes my entries so transparently obvious?

All right, all right, I knew the first one was obvious because of the setting and nature of the characters. But I thought the second reasonably different in content. So evidently it really is something in style. Or is it?

These are the questions going through the horsey mind:

(1) Is it really style, or was it timing, or something odd about the choice of content, or just that the first person's card had me for that number?

(2) If it's style, what the heck is it about it that gave it away so obviously?

(3) Is it something I need to work to change, or something that's good? (This is, of course, the issue that is most tormenting me.)

Naturally, these are rather self-obsessive questions and I quite understand that they may be met with utter disinterest. But ... well, frankly, I'm worried that this is a sign either that my writing has major characteristic flaws or that my style is too predominant and not flexible enough - a sort of caricature thing.

I'm willing to take a bullet - several - to get the answers. I want to write better. Any aid in reaching that goal is deeply appreciated.

Shanglan

(1) Is it really style, or was it timing, or something odd about the choice of content, or just that the first person's card had me for that number?

It's style or more pointedly, it's your voice. Each of us approach a story, in a certain way, with an eye to accomplishing certain things. You do it in a certain way. One thing that stands out to me is a completeness of thought, delivered in a concise manner. Another is an elegance of your prose and description. Something you cannot disguise is your intellect, your choice of more sophisticated things in your set up. Dita, might choose a waltz for a dance step. Gauche might. Oggs possibly. The vast majority would have just said they were dancing. What I have read of your works lack a certain amount of vulgarity. That isn't to say everyone else is vulgar, merely to point out with you, the choices always are sophisticated. I can't see you starting a story out with five guys at Hooters, ogling tits and cursing the flyers for trading Cutyacockoff.

(2) If it's style, what the heck is it about it that gave it away so obviously?

It's word choice for starters. You pick the right words, the ones that convey what you wish with a minimum of excess verbiage. Your descriptives are flowing, not getting lost in detail, but still conveying the scene you wish the reader to see. In even your short snippets, I can pick out a host of words that are, exactly what's needed. Words many of us would never use, but would instead use several smaller ones to get the effect you do with the right one. The only other author I know of who does this consistantly is Raphy. A swag of silk, a cumbering skirt, scrutinized plans. It's the right word on time, every time.

(3) Is it something I need to work to change, or something that's good? (This is, of course, the issue that is most tormenting me.)

Having a signature style is a good thing, assuming the style is not detrimental. Yours is certainly not. E's and H's can lie. The adulation of your peers is a surer sign you are doing something right. Your vision, translates to the page and from the page to the reader's mind. That's a rare gift, one you would be crazy to want to tinker with for the sake of not being recognizeable. I know Louis Lamour when I read his work. Richard Adams, Stephen Hawking, and Mark Twain. Being recognizeable by the quality of your work is no bad thing.

Naturally, these are rather self-obsessive questions and I quite understand that they may be met with utter disinterest. But ... well, frankly, I'm worried that this is a sign either that my writing has major characteristic flaws or that my style is too predominant and not flexible enough - a sort of caricature thing.

Not at all. It's simply recognizeable. Anne Rice is Anne Rice, whehter you are reding Lestat or the claiming of sleeping beauty. Her voice dosen't limit her venue, nor does yours. You could change. You could take lessons in the Colleen Thomas school of verbiage and take ten paras to describe something less well than you currently do in one. But why would you?

As an exercise, you might try to churn out something that dosen't sound like you. You have the talent to do it, and maybe even do it well, but what is the point? Would sounding like Carson, or Lou Lou or abs or myself do anything to raise the quality of your work or it's readability and enjoyability? Probably not. Carson sounds like Carson, and he writes good stuff. Same with Lou and abs. None of them sound anything like each other, but they each write enjoyable stories. Yours are fantastic. Changeing your style wouldn't make them any more fantastic and might make them less fun to write, as working to write in another style really hampers the pure enjoyment of writing.

My 2 cents

 

[yui]

Hi Shanglan,

I think everyone has made excellent points regarding the mannerisms that earmark your work as yours. You do have a very distinctive "voice" and style, but I think something you might also consider is how widely read your work is by your fellow participants. I would suggest that given how active you are in the forum and in PC, and how highly recommended you come, I doubt there are too many of us who haven’t read something you wrote. That makes it easier to pick you out of a lineup.

Luck,

Yui

P.S. And…well…the fact is, your style is very distinctive.

 

[cantdog]

Yeah.

 

[BlackShanglan]

By the way S... not true at all. Just more of a challenge. PM comng your way with example.

Loved the sample. But please understand me - I know that some can be beautiful in modern prose. I just find it difficult myself.

Trainspotting I think quite fine, for example.

What would be the point?

Well, little for the guessers, which is why I asked. For me, to test my ability to alter voice and stryle to suit a different topic or setting. But I suppose not. It seems like it would be a bit unreasonble to try to make you all my guinea pigs. I won't - or at least, I will try not do, but now I'm going to be hideously self-conscious about this for ages.

Thank you all for your comments both kind and insightful. I am very grateful that you took the time.

Shanglan

 

[cloudy]

Shanglan,

I'm just going to echo what some have already said....to me, it's the elegance of your words that stands out to me. There is also a rythym to your words that I have a difficulty describing, but that I recognize.

It's not a bad thing to stand out from the crowd that way, I promise.