"We're not a chat room...."

[Lancecastor]

Welcum to.....Casa Del Castor!

9/19/02

When this thread started, it was intended to talk about how The Sticky doesn't reflect the reality of the Forum. (see below)

But that got boring....and pretty soon it became more, well.....chatty....in here.

So, for those of you who start at the beginning, what lies ahead is quite a dog's breakfast.....it's kinda like the cafe/bar & grille at my palatial summer retreat, Casa Del Castor.

Enjoy!
Lance

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



The Sticky contains the following lines:

"We’re not a chat room and don’t wish to be a place where chat room type BDSM dialogue occurs within our threads and permeates our discussions.

We want you to feel free, however, to express your fears and voice your concerns in an open way. "

These two sentiments seem contradictory to me.

There is dialog permeating most every thread here.

Is dialog only okay if it's about fears and concerns?

Can we chat about this?

Would it help if I said I was afraid?

Is it okay if I say I'm not afraid, but kinda dig grrls who are (sometimes)?

Is there going to be a New Improved Sticky....or is bigger, colored type the extent of it?

So many questions....
Lance

 

[MissTaken]

Regardless of what the sticky does or doesn't say, if you are unhappy with the board as it has been flowing in the last week or two, be specific. Not pointing fingers at poster, but is there a trend here that you are uncomfortable with?

We continue to have our serious BDSM discussions.

We do have dialogue and some flip comments as if between comarades.

We are having fun and sharing information. I feel like there is a good mix at the present time.



Lance, this thread appears to be another pot shot at the mods.



Miss "Please say it isn't so* Taken

 

[Hot4Heels]

I take it that the "whip me harder baby" threads DONT belong here and DO belong over at the playground.

Nothing to do with the bantering that goes on here.

 

[Lancecastor]

Just Chatting....

...MissT, nothing nefarious afoot.

I've been quite happy of late with the way things have been going here, actually.

But since you asked.....I have noticed that my Evil Nemisis, Queen Cym, She of Opinions Most Harsh About Lance, has reappeared.

I could feel her presence in my bone(r) as it shrivelled and withered away over the weekend....something I first mistook for normal Swimming Shrinkage.

But I digress.....you see, after all the constructive talk and generally good Etiquette here of late, the Sticky has been edited recently not for Content, but Color, by Her Cymness.

Zzzzzzzzz.

Plus, Her Royal Moderate-ness just about eviscerated PB in the thread about the kind of mail we receive here as individuals...a clear sign that it won't be long before her Self Proclaimed Majesty of Not Giving A Fuck (About Men In Particular) will be in full flight.

Cymageddon, if you will.

So, seeing as my PM box and the Threads are still mysteriously empty of a Full & Proper Apology for Her Bitchiness' last great blast of bullshit my way....

I thought it might be prudent, and fair, to take this opportunity to get my licks in early this time, before I am gang raped by She & They.

Pot shot? Hardly.

A shameless pre-emptive first dig, yes.

Guess I should have waited a few days, eh? Damn, I've missed Her.



Lance

Regardless of what the sticky does or doesn't say, if you are unhappy with the board as it has been flowing in the last week or two, be specific. Not pointing fingers at poster, but is there a trend here that you are uncomfortable with?

We continue to have our serious BDSM discussions.

We do have dialogue and some flip comments as if between comarades.

We are having fun and sharing information. I feel like there is a good mix at the present time.



Lance, this thread appears to be another pot shot at the mods.



Miss "Please say it isn't so* Taken

 

[A Desert Rose]

Isn't this considered "CHAT"?
Some one posts, some one responds..... looks like chat to me.

Back away from your keyboards, slowly.

And Lance, you simply have no control over yourself, do you?
LMAO.

Rose

 

[MissTaken]

OH well, I knew I would be sorry I asked.

Damn, Lance.

You sucked me right in!

 

[morninggirl5]

Re: Just Chatting....

...MissT, nothing nefarious afoot.

I've been quite happy of late with the way things have been going here, actually.

But since you asked.....I have noticed that my Evil Nemisis, Queen Cym, She of Opinions Most Harsh About Lance, has reappeared.

I could feel her presence in my bone(r) as it shrivelled and withered away over the weekend....something I first mistook for normal Swimming Shrinkage.

But I digress.....you see, after all the constructive talk and generally good Etiquette here of late, the Sticky has been edited recently not for Content, but Color, by Her Cymness.

Zzzzzzzzz.

Plus, Her Royal Moderate-ness just about eviscerated PB in the thread about the kind of mail we receive here as individuals...a clear sign that it won't be long before her Self Proclaimed Majesty of Not Giving A Fuck (About Men In Particular) will be in full flight.

Cymageddon, if you will.

So, seeing as my PM box and the Threads are still mysteriously empty of a Full & Proper Apology for Her Bitchiness' last great blast of bullshit my way....

I thought it might be prudent, and fair, to take this opportunity to get my licks in early this time, before I am gang raped by She & They.

Pot shot? Hardly.

A shameless pre-emptive first dig, yes.

Guess I should have waited a few days, eh? Damn, I've missed Her.



Lance

Count this as my pre-emptive quote in case you decide to edit.

 

[Lancecastor]

"Whip Me Harder Baby" protocol

I take it that the "whip me harder baby" threads DONT belong here and DO belong over at the playground.

Nothing to do with the bantering that goes on here.

A good question, Hot4Heels...

It seems to me that anything of the "Whip Me Harder Baby" (WMHB) variety inherently "belongs" here, unless it is a WMHB post that evidences the need for Therapy, in which case you should "look elsewhere".

"Elsewhere" means, of course, the General Board, where all good therapy begins.

If the WMHB post results in "chat" back and forth, it has to go to a "chat room" somewhere....perhaps the Playground, as you've suggested.

However, if the WMHB post is of a "sharing" variety, or is part of a discussion of the longing, abuse, victimization or lonliness you and others like you feel about never having had a BDSM experience IRL....well, you'll have lots of luck anf thousands of posts racked up here in no time.

*Hugs* to you for sharing; your words will carry me through the inner pain I feel.

Lance "Sincerly" Castor

 

[CarolineOh]

Re: Just Chatting....

...MissT, nothing nefarious afoot.

I've been quite happy of late with the way things have been going here, actually.

But since you asked.....I have noticed that my Evil Nemisis, Queen Cym, She of Opinions Most Harsh About Lance, has reappeared.

I could feel her presence in my bone(r) as it shrivelled and withered away over the weekend....something I first mistook for normal Swimming Shrinkage.

But I digress.....you see, after all the constructive talk and generally good Etiquette here of late, the Sticky has been edited recently not for Content, but Color, by Her Cymness.

Zzzzzzzzz.

Plus, Her Royal Moderate-ness just about eviscerated PB in the thread about the kind of mail we receive here as individuals...a clear sign that it won't be long before her Self Proclaimed Majesty of Not Giving A Fuck (About Men In Particular) will be in full flight.

Cymageddon, if you will.

So, seeing as my PM box and the Threads are still mysteriously empty of a Full & Proper Apology for Her Bitchiness' last great blast of bullshit my way....

I thought it might be prudent, and fair, to take this opportunity to get my licks in early this time, before I am gang raped by She & They.

Pot shot? Hardly.

A shameless pre-emptive first dig, yes.

Guess I should have waited a few days, eh? Damn, I've missed Her.



Lance

Just saving this one for the record.

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Re: Just Chatting....

Count this as my pre-emptive quote in case you decide to edit.

Damn you, foul temptress!

Lance "Damn it's hard being evil in a room full of pure evil!" Castor

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Re: Just Chatting....

Just saving this one for the record.

Is that like "first post"?

Are you chatting at me?

Now that I have all your attention....can we get a Sticky drawn up that:

1. Tells it like it really is about this place (mostly a support group for women);

2. Sets out something less ambiguous and false-sugar-filled for newbies so they dont get mugged as quickly;

3. Attempts to encourage the many Lurkers to post instead of coming just for the public floggings ?

Seriously....

 

[Persephone36]

Re: Re: Re: Just Chatting....

Is that like "first post"?

Are you chatting at me?

Now that I have all your attention....can we get a Sticky drawn up that:

1. Tells it like it really is about this place (mostly a support group for women);

2. Sets out something less ambiguous and false-sugar-filled for newbies so they dont get mugged as quickly;

3. Attempts to encourage the many Lurkers to post instead of coming just for the public floggings ?

Seriously....

LOL, I posted without putting my comments in. Itchy trigger finger.

And seriously Lance -- if there is no change to the Sticky what are you going to do? Make a big huff every day? Learn to live with it? Leave the board? What?

1. First off there are plenty of men on here. And we're as supportive of them as the women. That's just a silly statement to make. What difference does it make who one is being supportive of, gender wise. You might chose not to be supportive of women -- what would that make you then? You want us to all judge like that -- judge you included? Should we all get together analyze exactly *who* is being supported by number and gender for every post? Is being supportive of Wanderer, who's a man, to be valued more?

2. What newbies are being mugged for pete's sake? Have you been paying attention at all the last two weeks?

3. And considering the fact that you do much of the flogging of others here, what do you have to say for yourself?

I can't take you seriously since you made all these grandiose statements about etiquette -- and then proceed to break a heck of a lot of them because of your personal issues.

These sort of judgments are too simplistic for you Lance. I *thought* your intellect is past them.

Sad to see you wasting time when you could be a supportive and positive influence. But as long as you choose to roll around in the mud -- it's going to be hard for me at least, to take you as much more than a troll.

 

[DRxBlue]

Uuuuhh...hi Lance!

We haven't really met. i have skimmed through a number of your posts and come to a few preliminary conclusions, but i'm willing to let my opinion of you start right here.

i really appreciate how nice you've been to one of my dearest friends, Ebonyfire. She speaks of you most highly. And i have read some quite witty rejoinders in various debates, which indicate that you are not exactly unarmed when it comes to a battle of wits.

BUT! (you knew that was coming right?) i have also seen you launch endless tirades and throw tantrums that would embarrass a 3 year old, then claim that you were only defending yourself.

If you think that cym (another very dear friend) is your biggest worry.

my Evil Nemisis, Queen Cym, She of Opinions Most Harsh About Lance

i'm not sure, but i may be able to top that, if you refuse to use a little restraint, decorum and "Netiquette".

As to the subject of this thread. i should think that the term "chat room" is by now quite well defined. In a "chat room" environment it is not uncommon for people to branch off from subjects, hijack threads, have flirtations and even cyber sex. All kinds of things are allowed, if not encouraged.

Lit has plenty of space for that kind of fun, but the BDSM forum has been designated from the beginning as a place for more serious discussions. It has tried to develop a feeling of community for those of us who have this subject in common.

Is that what you really wanted to talk about? Does it make sense?

See ya,
Blue

 

[Lancecastor]

Step Away From The Shrink Wrap...

Isn't this considered "CHAT"?
Some one posts, some one responds..... looks like chat to me.

Back away from your keyboards, slowly.

And Lance, you simply have no control over yourself, do you?
LMAO.

Rose

Well, "this" possibly is chat, ADR, because we're not talking about Pain & Loss....it's the Laughter that is the differentiator, I think...

Control? Oh, I'm completely in control here, my dear.

Lance "Mastering His Domain*" Castor

*thanks to Artful... and Seinfeld.... for that one.

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Uuuuhh...hi Lance!

Hey DRxBlue;

Everything you say makes perfect sense.

Except for that tantrum/tirade bit...hardly endless, and certainly provoked in my view.

I like to think I have a good sense of Netiquette; that sense tells me that it's okay to say I'm pissy at not getting an apology from Moderator Cym if I think I'm due one (and I do), just as you're entitled to suggest I'm a 3 year old who might get verbally spanked by the good Doctor if I don't leave your friend Cym alone.

A large portion of my umbrage with ModCym arose in fact from her possibly improper revalations and totally badassed treatment of a mutual friend of Ours, DrxBlue. Ixnay on that.

The rest of it comes from her general heavy-handedness, all too often at the expense of proper or even-handed discussion within the spirit and letter of the (hypocrisy-laden) Sticky She penned.

So, given that She's back and we've presumably gone through the "Oh how I missed you, *hugs*, threads" (which thankfully I missed, as that *hugs* stuff disgusts me)....I thought it might be a good idea to pick things up where She & I left off.

Because I've been here, counting the days, waiting to hear what She has to say for herself when she blew back in here as if nothing happened after her gigantic self-absorbed hissy fit at me and all the trolls that appeared in her absence. Netiquette, my ass.

I'd like to talk to her about it. Not her minions. Her.

Meanwhile....good to cross posts with you, DrxBlue; you too come highly recommended on the Underground PM Network.

Cheers
Lance

We haven't really met. i have skimmed through a number of your posts and come to a few preliminary conclusions, but i'm willing to let my opinion of you start right here.

i really appreciate how nice you've been to one of my dearest friends, Ebonyfire. She speaks of you most highly. And i have read some quite witty rejoinders in various debates, which indicate that you are not exactly unarmed when it comes to a battle of wits.

BUT! (you knew that was coming right?) i have also seen you launch endless tirades and throw tantrums that would embarrass a 3 year old, then claim that you were only defending yourself.

If you think that cym (another very dear friend) is your biggest worry.



i'm not sure, but i may be able to top that, if you refuse to use a little restraint, decorum and "Netiquette".

As to the subject of this thread. i should think that the term "chat room" is by now quite well defined. In a "chat room" environment it is not uncommon for people to branch off from subjects, hijack threads, have flirtations and even cyber sex. All kinds of things are allowed, if not encouraged.

Lit has plenty of space for that kind of fun, but the BDSM forum has been designated from the beginning as a place for more serious discussions. It has tried to develop a feeling of community for those of us who have this subject in common.

Is that what you really wanted to talk about? Does it make sense?

See ya,
Blue

 

[P. B. Walker]

Re: Just Chatting....

...
Plus, Her Royal Moderate-ness just about eviscerated PB in the thread about the kind of mail we receive here as individuals...a clear sign that it won't be long before her Self Proclaimed Majesty of Not Giving A Fuck (About Men In Particular) will be in full flight.

That was actually all my fault... I didn't quote who I was replying to. And after I looked at why she jumped all over me.. i saw that I posted something right under her post and it did look like I was replying to her post.

That was totally my fuck-up... .no need for an apology from anyone else... I'm sorry about that.

PBW

 

[CarolineOh]

Re: Re: Uuuuhh...hi Lance!

Hey DRxBlue;

Everything you say makes perfect sense.

Except for that tantrum/tirade bit...hardly endless, and certainly provoked in my view.

I like to think I have a good sense of Netiquette; that sense tells me that it's okay to say I'm pissy at not getting an apology from Moderator Cym if I think I'm due one (and I do), just as you're entitled to suggest I'm a 3 year old who might get verbally spanked by the good Doctor if I don't leave your friend Cym alone.

A large portion of my umbrage with ModCym arose in fact from her possibly improper revalations and totally badassed treatment of a mutual friend of Ours, DrxBlue. Ixnay on that.

The rest of it comes from her general heavy-handedness, all too often at the expense of proper or even-handed discussion within the spirit and letter of the (hypocrisy-laden) Sticky She penned.

So, given that She's back and we've presumably gone through the "Oh how I missed you, *hugs*, threads" (which thankfully I missed, as that *hugs* stuff disgusts me)....I thought it might be a good idea to pick things up where She & I left off.

Because I've been here, counting the days, waiting to hear what She has to say for herself when she blew back in here as if nothing happened after her gigantic self-absorbed hissy fit at me and all the trolls that appeared in her absence. Netiquette, my ass.

I'd like to talk to her about it. Not her minions. Her.

Meanwhile....good to cross posts with you, DrxBlue; you too come highly recommended on the Underground PM Network.

Cheers
Lance

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Just Chatting....

These sort of judgments are too simplistic for you Lance. I *thought* your intellect is past them.

Damnit. You're right.

Never mind....new thread!
Lance

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Re: Just Chatting....

That was actually all my fault... I didn't quote who I was replying to. And after I looked at why she jumped all over me.. i saw that I posted something right under her post and it did look like I was replying to her post.

That was totally my fuck-up... .no need for an apology from anyone else... I'm sorry about that.

PBW

No way...it wasn't your fault, PB, it was mine.

I was simply feeling your mistaken pain and loss....then, to top it off, I started to feel those old feelings of hurt, pain, anger and loss when Cym ignored me and her friends started calling me names.

And your new AV, sans smile, made me feel sad inside, and I was in my pool of sadness and loss all over again.

I'm sorry, man.

It was me.

I have no right to expect any apologies from the grrls here.

All I can hope for is maybe...maybe...that one day they'll see my inner child, the happy little boy in me....and accept me for who I really am.

*sniff*

*Hugs* to you, BigGuy. I'm sorry.

Lance "Kinder, Gentler" Castor

 

[Persephone36]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Just Chatting....

Damnit. You're right.

Never mind....new thread!
Lance

Good, I hope you were responding to me seriously because I think you can be better than the stuff you just threw out tonight.

A lot of people had great weekends. We're happy to be sharing that -- there's nothing wrong with spreading a few hugs around. If it's not your thing -- that's fine. I can respect that. But don't get down on us for simply being happy for each other.

And hopefully -- as you said, new thread.

P.

 

[DRxBlue]

If it IS you're admitted intention to continue hostilities from right where they left off, might i suggest you put up an "Ultimate Showdown" thread, an arena for your combat, and have one spot for ALL the unpleasantness to occur.

Then those of us who really benefit from hugs and sympathy and heart, warming kitty cuddliness, can do so. While you and your fellow tough guys can have your space too.

Pretending that you don't understand the difference between a "chat room" and what this board was intended to be, to launch a "pre-emptive strike" and break the "cease fire" seems like needlessly convoluted subterfuge.

If you wanna fuckin' FIGHT! Go ahead but call it that!

just a thought,
Blue

 

[Lancecastor]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Just Chatting....

Really, you're right...I can indeed do much better than that.

I'm just pissy because I've received no apology for being mugged by a Moderator in full view of the Community.

And I'm disappointed that upon Their return, it's the same shit, different day, all over again.

But if it comes down to Me being the only one who cares about the shabby way people get treated here, so be it. I'll look out for myself. Fuck the Sticky. (hmmm,that kinda sounds like fun!)

I had a lovely weekend, by the way....well, except for the hornet in my throat....how was yours?

*Hugs*
Lance

Good, I hope you were responding to me seriously because I think you can be better than the stuff you just threw out tonight.

A lot of people had great weekends. We're happy to be sharing that -- there's nothing wrong with spreading a few hugs around. If it's not your thing -- that's fine. I can respect that. But don't get down on us for simply being happy for each other.

And hopefully -- as you said, new thread.

P.

 

[P. B. Walker]

Re: Re: Re: Just Chatting....

No way...it wasn't your fault, PB, it was mine.

I was simply feeling your mistaken pain and loss....then, to top it off, I started to feel those old feelings of hurt, pain, anger and loss when Cym ignored me and her friends started calling me names.

And your new AV, sans smile, made me feel sad inside, and I was in my pool of sadness and loss all over again.

I'm sorry, man.

It was me.

I have no right to expect any apologies from the grrls here.

All I can hope for is maybe...maybe...that one day they'll see my inner child, the happy little boy in me....and accept me for who I really am.

*sniff*

*Hugs* to you, BigGuy. I'm sorry.

Lance "Kinder, Gentler" Castor

Hugs back at ya big guy... you crack me up sometimes... I'm just crying here. Keep at it dude... you'll win someday.

PBW "Keep up the good fight"

 

[DRxBlue]

Pretty COOL actually!

You got a HORNET in your throat! Having been a singer since i could speak, that thought horrifies me...(shiver)

Thanks a lot, man. i know that Eb is a great judge of character. i'm really glad to meet you.

Shake?(or would you prefer a hug?)
Blue


P.S.P.B.
i like your new av! i didn't think you looked unhappy...more thoughtful

 

[Persephone36]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Just Chatting....

Really, you're right...I can indeed do much better than that.

I'm just pissy because I've received no apology for being mugged by a Moderator in full view of the Community.

And I'm disappointed that upon Their return, it's the same shit, different day, all over again.

But if it comes down to Me being the only one who cares about the shabby way people get treated here, so be it. I'll look out for myself. Fuck the Sticky. (hmmm,that kinda sounds like fun!)

I had a lovely weekend, by the way....well, except for the hornet in my throat....how was yours?

*Hugs*
Lance

You're pissy at the moment??? NOOOOOOOO!

I'm *shocked* and I never would have guessed!

Yeah -- somehow I read between the lines on that, lol. I'm an usually smart woman.

I'm sorry to hear you had a hornet down your throat -- god, did you have to go to the hospital for that. Sounds horrific.

I had an excellent weekend -- thank you for asking.

Goes to show that one can meet a person from LIT -- and have a *rockin'* good time together.

And respectfully -- cut the hugs junk to me Lance, k? It only reads as bitchy sarcasm. And again -- I think you can be more clever than that. (At least with me, lol.)

P.