Wanted: Mistress Advice from Doms and Subs

[my_lil_secret]

I have a very difficult subject, and I need some professional insight. Or just insight, period. I'm way out of my comfort zone with him.

First off, I'm female 5'1", and he's 6'. So he's huge in comparison to me, and he's bi. I'm bi too. He has only one rule, that I can hurt him anywhere but his 'junk'. When he's with men he's usually the dominant. He did have one guy that was able to dominate him good, once. The size difference did it for him (the guy was short like me), and the guy never let him cum. The guy would cum and call him a faggot, but never let him cum. Faggot is a huge turn on, when I call him this. I don't understand it.

I've tried force, he wants more mental oppression. He says he's not much of a masochist, but boy is he a sadist. Typically our relationship is Him Dom, me Sub. Noncon and Daddy/little are our favs.

But we're both switches, and I'd like to start having sessions with him. I just can't understand what makes him tick, at all. He doesn't want a lot of pain-- says never crop him in the stomach or the cock. I need some advice on what will make him twitch.

I'd like to know how to force orgasm in men (without eliciting pain) possibly after they've already cum once, and I'm looking for some insight on what I could do to get into his brain. What I could do that would drive him insanely hot for me..

 

[edal1959]

Research sensual domination or sensual sadism. From your description of the session he had with the guy, sounds like tease and denial might rock his boat. The name calling suggests he may like a bit of humiliation play. Try some things out, and then debrief him after the session (the next day, so he has time to think about it). The key is to communicate, try some things, and communicate some more.

 

[Netzach]

I'm smelling more of a denial or chastity situation rather than a forced orgasm one? The hint being that the guy who got into his head never let him get off...a lot of guys are into intense scenarios and lose interest the second they lose a load, so it's all about keeping the urges going.

The whole "faggot bottom hole" thing is hot for a lot of people. I might watch some gay SM porn with particularly mean tops and see if you can't channel some of that dynamic a little bit, you might find it a turn on to just ignore the fact that you're not some muscular bear and proceed as if you were.

Hurt anywhere but the tackle is a reasonable and common enough limit. There are tons of other places to hurt someone, if you like sexualizing pain a lot go for the tits. Pain sounds less important to him than assertion.

Make him talk too, if you're not sure about something it's his job to explain himself. Interrogate him, you can make it sexy instead of all "checklist".

 

[my_lil_secret]

thank you, I will be looking into all of this.

to be honest I find it difficult to think about not allowing him to cum. It's like my ultimate present when he does. I also like to please. But I think you are absolutely right on, he likes the denial. He said he used to leave the sessions and go get off on his own. I think that's what was most puzzling to me, why someone would want sexual acts without the gratification. I enjoy the same thing and I don't even understand myself. I get off hardest when I'm alone after a session.

any favorite derogatory names or interrogation questions?.