Video Recomendation

[mblanton]

I Need a Video Recomendation...Please

I was wanting to get some videos for my wife. Something geared towards females that will show some techniques and positions.

 

[Halo_n_horns]

I was wanting to get some videos for my wife. Something geared towards females that will show some techniques and positions.

http://www.bettersex.com/Default.asp?cookie_test=1

 

[kkoozz]

online shop

Try eBay.

 

[mblanton]

Sorry....I'm not looking for a place to shop, I'm hoping someone will suggest specific titles. We have a hard time communicating about sex and I thought a video might be a good place to start. I am looking for something informative, not just hard core porn.

Thanks,

Mike

 

[M's girl]

I was wanting to get some videos for my wife. Something geared towards females that will show some techniques and positions.

Who exactly do you want to learn from it? You or your wife? I know there is porn out there that is especialy aimed at women and there's plenty sex-guides ('how to' movies) too (like the series from porn star Nina Hartley). I bought "Constance" with Katja Kean because it was recommended as a typical porn movie made for women. Haven't watched it yet though so can't tell you if it's any good.

May I suggest you also take a look in my thread (have no idea how to put a link here, help!!) but it's in the HT Café and called "Women and porn (question for the ladies)". You will find what other ladies want to see in porn and some suggestions from me about titles.

See you there? (Djeez, I should have gone into the advertisement business after all )......

 

[M's girl]

We have a hard time communicating about sex and I thought a video might be a good place to start. I am looking for something informative, not just hard core porn.

Sorry, had not looked at this one well enough before posting the (my) former one. Okay... I would say Nina Hartley. I am assuming (based on nothing really) that since you have a hard time talking about sex she might also be shy and insecure to do it. Just assuming here... So NOT starting with hardcore porn is a VERY good idea. The porn that I consider to be aimed more towards women, is that to me because it pays attention to foreplay, the woman (....) and the whole entourage (decor etc), but it is still hardcore porn (Suze Randall etc.).

I have a few DVD's by Nina Hartley and I like her. She is a (former?) porn star but seems to know exactly what women want (which is probably NOT what she portaits in her films). I find it that much more cool that she made this series as well to show the other side. Feels to me like sort of making up for what she 'took down' in porn movies.

Now don't get me wrong. I love to watch porn and am very much into hardcore stuff. But let's face it: what happens on screen is 95% fairytale material. That's OK though, as long as everyone realizes that. The problem, I think, is that too many men (and women) start to believe that thát is the standard. Especially for women that can be very intimidating.

IMHO it is good to start with a DVD like Nina's "Making Love To Women". It will show your wife that you care to learn about how women experience sex. If she has a hard time talking about it she can comment on things that were said in the film and agree or disagree ("that works very well for me too" or "hmmm you shouldn't do that to me, I know it doesn't feel right", things like that...)

How do I know? You wouldn't say so if you read my thread and replies in general but this comes from a woman who is still learning how to be more vocal (during sex and talking about it!) herself.... Writing (and certainly sort of incognito, like here on LIT) is sooooo much easier.

Which reminds me of something that could help you too. Maybe she's more comfortable putting her thoughts (about sex ánd intimacy - the two are very much connected for most women) on paper. You could keep a diary together and write to each other. M and I are frequently on IM (yahoo) during the day when we are away from each other (work) and I dare to "say" a lot more there than in RL, although I'm getting better all the time ... See, it takes practice too.

OK, I'm babbling.... I'll stop.
Good luck. And good fun with Nina!

M's Girl

 

[Lust Engine]

My personal suggestion for two titles would be some of Andrew Blake's earlier works, Hidden Obsessions and Night Trips. They're almost shot in kind of a dream state sort of way but very sensual. There's lots of things (somewhat attractive stars too!) in both of these flicks to enjoy although it is starting to look a little more dated now. I've always considered either one of these a great primer for couples porn.

 

[M's girl]

My personal suggestion for two titles would be some of Andrew Blake's earlier works, Hidden Obsessions and Night Trips. They're almost shot in kind of a dream state sort of way but very sensual. There's lots of things (somewhat attractive stars too!) in both of these flicks to enjoy although it is starting to look a little more dated now. I've always considered either one of these a great primer for couples porn.

Good call. Blake is good and sophisticated. Although in this case it might be a bit too much hardcore to start with? But Blake is definately always on my wishlist too. I must say I'm starting to think that he's bending towards lesbian porn more often these days? Am not sure, but the titles that I've come across lately...?

 

[Lust Engine]

Good call. Blake is good and sophisticated. Although in this case it might be a bit too much hardcore to start with? But Blake is definately always on my wishlist too. I must say I'm starting to think that he's bending towards lesbian porn more often these days? Am not sure, but the titles that I've come across lately...?

True. mblanton did ask for something more technique oriented and last I checked none of the Blake movies are anything I'd consider along that genre. They are pretty hot and saucy though- or at least his earlier stuff. You are right though- I do think Blake is starting ot make more artsy lesbian porn flicks now that don't do much for me. It's almost an hour & a half worth of eye candy (as gorgeous as it may be) without any climaxes reached.

 

[M's girl]

..... You are right though- I do think Blake is starting ot make more artsy lesbian porn flicks now that don't do much for me. It's almost an hour & a half worth of eye candy (as gorgeous as it may be) without any climaxes reached.

Eye candy..... That's what it is. Nicely put. Lesbian scenes don't do much for me eighter although I don't mind looking at them, but not a whole movie for certain. I will appreciate it mainly because, in some cases, some attention is finally directed to the woman's pleasure, but still... Also... in some cases you would say those women would know how to eat each other out (now if that is done well that is a big turn on) but no... they start fooling around with dildo's etcetera! LOL Is that really what you guys want to see? And if so, is that because it makes you feel good because you think it's because they miss a man? I'm always wondering. I know M does not get it eighter (or so he says )... haha

 

[Lust Engine]

Eye candy..... That's what it is. Nicely put. Lesbian scenes don't do much for me eighter although I don't mind looking at them, but not a whole movie for certain. I will appreciate it mainly because, in some cases, some attention is finally directed to the woman's pleasure, but still... Also... in some cases you would say those women would know how to eat each other out (now if that is done well that is a big turn on) but no... they start fooling around with dildo's etcetera! LOL Is that really what you guys want to see? And if so, is that because it makes you feel good because you think it's because they miss a man? I'm always wondering. I know M does not get it eighter (or so he says )... haha

I can't even think of the last male porn star that's even been in an Andrew Blake movie! He's definitely taken his form of porn down the softer, touchy feely route. While I'm all for a woman feeling sensual and exploring that- it should achieve climax somewhere down the pipe, don'tcha think?? It's almost like a compilation movie nowadays.

I will give it to him that he does hire some absolutely stunningly gorgeous women in all of his features. Some of the sets are done beautifully as well. So visually he's great but on the sensuality & evocative side of things, he lost me about seven movies ago.

Hmmm...I hope that we haven't hijacked this thread or anything but to the original poster- what exactly are you looking for in regards to showing techniques & positions? Are you looking for a movie (plot, actors, dialogue, etc..) or an instructional video??

 

[Epona's Chylde]

Sorry, I can't really help with this question...does she have a problem with mainstream porn? Personally, I think "women's porn" is boring as fuck.

 

[M's girl]

I can't even think of the last male porn star that's even been in an Andrew Blake movie! He's definitely taken his form of porn down the softer, touchy feely route. While I'm all for a woman feeling sensual and exploring that- it should achieve climax somewhere down the pipe, don'tcha think?? It's almost like a compilation movie nowadays.

Well, let me see... ['diving' into IKEA's PS cabinet to get old Blake video's out]... uhm... "Hidden Obsessions" and "Sensual Exposure" definately have men in them.

Hmmm video's..... they should go to the museum really....

 

[Lust Engine]

Well, let me see... ['diving' into IKEA's PS cabinet to get old Blake video's out]... uhm... "Hidden Obsessions" and "Sensual Exposure" definately have men in them.

Toss Night Trips, Paris Chic, Delirious & Wet into that lot as well as far as having man meat doing its thing with the ladies. Those are all flicks he did in the 90's. Nothing this decade has shown Blake to having a stud muffin in his flicks.

And I was all set on starring for his movies as well too. Damn!

 

[M's girl]

And I was all set on starring for his movies as well too. Damn!

Poor you, now what are you to do now?

 

[mblanton]

Thanks for all the great information so far. Let me try to give everyone a little information about me. I've been married for 10 years and lately (last few years) sex has become, well, boring. We don't communicate well with each other and we rush through it (sex usually lasted 10 minutes)...it just isn't fun. Sexually I am a very open person, but my wife has always been very inhibitted when it comes to sex.

We got the better sex video volume I and have watched half of it so far. After watching the 1st half and talking about the material as we were watching we made out for like 30 minutes, then she masterbated herself to orgasm while I held and caressed her. She gave me oral (not a simpathy blowjob)....the kind that makes everything fuzzy and white and hard to concentrate. Last, but not least we had intercouse with her on top. It was one of those nights that I will remember for along time to come. I don't remember when we have smiled and laughed so much togehter. It was like playtime for to kids and we're both in our mid 30's. It was great.

We have decided to set aside 1 night a week that will be our night to play so to speak. I would like more, but I am willing to let her work at her own pace. I would like to keep using videos, because they seem to help. After we go though the better sex series maybe we can graduate to some harder stuff. We'll have to see what happens.

Thanks for the information so far and keep it coming.

Mike

 

[M's girl]

We got the better sex video volume I and have watched half of it so far. After watching the 1st half and talking about the material as we were watching we made out for like 30 minutes, then she masterbated herself to orgasm while I held and caressed her. She gave me oral (not a simpathy blowjob)....the kind that makes everything fuzzy and white and hard to concentrate. Last, but not least we had intercouse with her on top. It was one of those nights that I will remember for along time to come. I don't remember when we have smiled and laughed so much togehter. It was like playtime for to kids and we're both in our mid 30's. It was great.
Mike

Sounds like a HUGE step 1 to me! Keep going! Also, having fun together, outside, but certainly also IN bed is sooo important. It relaxes you, brings you closer together and sets the mood for intimate things.

Haha, I'm actually happy for you! Go figure... I don't even know you

 

[Epona's Chylde]

Thanks for all the great information so far. Let me try to give everyone a little information about me. I've been married for 10 years and lately (last few years) sex has become, well, boring. We don't communicate well with each other and we rush through it (sex usually lasted 10 minutes)...it just isn't fun. Sexually I am a very open person, but my wife has always been very inhibitted when it comes to sex.

We got the better sex video volume I and have watched half of it so far. After watching the 1st half and talking about the material as we were watching we made out for like 30 minutes, then she masterbated herself to orgasm while I held and caressed her. She gave me oral (not a simpathy blowjob)....the kind that makes everything fuzzy and white and hard to concentrate. Last, but not least we had intercouse with her on top. It was one of those nights that I will remember for along time to come. I don't remember when we have smiled and laughed so much togehter. It was like playtime for to kids and we're both in our mid 30's. It was great.

We have decided to set aside 1 night a week that will be our night to play so to speak. I would like more, but I am willing to let her work at her own pace. I would like to keep using videos, because they seem to help. After we go though the better sex series maybe we can graduate to some harder stuff. We'll have to see what happens.

Thanks for the information so far and keep it coming.

Mike

I'm glad to hear things are going well for you..but I'm a bit shocked that you've been married this long and are just now getting around to things watching her masturbate or her on top.

I was letting my b/f watch me masturbate back when I was a virgin!!!!! And I always loved oral. Within one month of losing my virginity, I had tired about every position out there!!!!

I feel really sorry for women who are inhibitied like that. They don't know what they are missing out on. I feel doubly sorry for the men that love them and have to deal with them.

Geez, and the same women will wonder why their man cheats....


Personally, I have the "sexual compatibility" talk before I EVER have sex with someone...if they can't keep up with my freak factor, its over.

 

[M's girl]

I feel really sorry for women who are inhibitied like that. They don't know what they are missing out on. I feel doubly sorry for the men that love them and have to deal with them.

Geez, and the same women will wonder why their man cheats....

I agree but not to the extend of that I think they should wonder why their man cheats. Sorry, I don't.

Communication is the key word here and although Mike (I take him as an example although I don't know or think if/that he has been cheating, I just assume he did not) is taking the matter to a next level now, he could have done that 9 years ago as well. I just guess there was something that held him back. He said he was bored and if this is what he did to break through the boredom I think that's great! Other men go cheat on their wife without trying what Mike has done and I don't think there is any excuse for that! Because, as you can see in Mike's case, she's responding and things (ahum... ) are looking up. They have just started. I think there's lots more waiting for them.... Mike, for one, will be far (FAR!) too busy to even have the time to think about cheating...

 

[Epona's Chylde]

I'm not saying that being sexually bored is a valid reason for cheating and I'm not condoning it necessarily (but then again, I don't believe in monogamy at all...I prefer open relationships.)

What I am saying though, is that a man is a sexual creature and (right or wrong) a lot of men will cheat if they are not sexually satisfied.

They LOVE their wife but they don't love their sex life....so they get their fulfullment elsewhere.

I don't think its right but it is a fact of life. Personally, I think people shouldn't get involved with someone who isn't sexually compatible.That's just my opinion though. I discuss sex usually on the first date...no point in wasting my time or his.

There are certain sexual things that are "deal breakers" with me. No matter how much I like him, if certain sexual criteria aren't met, I'm not going to pursue dating him.

 

[M's girl]

What I am saying though, is that a man is a sexual creature and (right or wrong) a lot of men will cheat if they are not sexually satisfied. They LOVE their wife but they don't love their sex life....so they get their fulfullment elsewhere.

I don't think its right but it is a fact of life. Personally, I think people shouldn't get involved with someone who isn't sexually compatible.That's just my opinion though.

You are probably right about the cheating. I am a VERY monogamous person myself and I don't judge, but it's just not my thing. Your statement about men that are not satisfied is probably true but I've also heard about men who's sexlife could be considered wonderful and they still cheated.

I guess it boils down to sexual compatibility then, like you said. How wonderful would it be (and I'm serious, not trying to make a joke here) if we could be more like you and discuss sex so early on ánd be so frank about it! That would save a lot of people a lot of heartache and hard times. But I don't see it happening on a large scale any time soon and until then it is my opinion that if you are clear on a monogamous relationship, you don't go look for thrils outside of that...

 

[Epona's Chylde]

The monogamous mind set is one that I won't try to understand...

But I do believe in trust. And its wrong to violate trust.

Men cheat for many reasons. We can't lump them into one big pile and call them all assholes.

Some men cheat because they don't respect their spouse and just don't give a crap. These are usually men who sleep with a different woman every weekend, just for the sex. They have no remorse and don't think that what they are doing is wrong.

There are also men who cheat because they are deeply unsatisfied in their relationship but scared to leave...(because of finances, kids, etc)...so they pursue a secondary relationship.

I'm not saying its "right", but I understand it. It doesn't make him a bad person, (because he still loves the wife, respects her, and feels horribly guilty for what he's doing) but it does make him a "weak" person.

I've been "the other woman" in a situation like that. Although lying to his wife was wrong, I understood why he did it. She was a good, sweet person, but she just didn't understand him and he was too weak-willed to do the right thing and walk away from her.

As for discussing sex openly and frankly, I can't understand why people don't do this. I know women who will ask "do you want kids" on the first date, but not "Do you eat pussy?" Uh, HELLO, if he doesn't eat pussy, Im not interested in marrying him and having kids!!!!!!!

Vanilla sex doesn't cut it for me and I've learned the hard way not to fall for a guy who isn't going to satisfy my kinky heart. Easiest way to avoid this is to be upfront.

 

[M's girl]

..... but I do believe in trust. And its wrong to violate trust.

As for discussing sex openly and frankly, I can't understand why people don't do this. I know women who will ask "do you want kids" on the first date, but not "Do you eat pussy?" Uh, HELLO, if he doesn't eat pussy, Im not interested in marrying him and having kids!!!!!!!

I think in the end we agree and think alike, we're just wired differently, and that is OK. Of course it's a matter of trust in the first place....

I had to laugh about your comment about discussing sex. You are so and totally right. And I consider myself to be fairly open minded and everything but I could at the very best hint at it if and when I would feel very flurtatious and bold. Have never asked a man if he would be willing to eat me out on the first date... not even the second, although in some cases, I knew what the answer would be already by then....

 

[Epona's Chylde]

I have a list of rules that I normally share with any guy who asks me out...They're a bit blunt but if he reads them and is still interested, he might just be the right kind of guy for me


Epona's Rules for dating:

1.I don’t do one-night stands. Period.

2.Sex with me is a privilege, not a right. You’ll get it when and if I decide you’re worthy, which will be absolutely no sooner (and quite possibly later) than the third date.

3.Kinky sex is earned by proving to me that you are trustworthy, genuinely interested in me, and talented at vanilla sex. Expect to have vanilla sex with me several times before we pull out the ropes, the handcuffs or the floggers.

4.If you are just trying to get laid, and not interested in a relationship, let me know ahead of time. I already have several fuck buddies and am not particularly interested in acquiring more, but if I really like you, I may add you to the list.

5.Monogamy should never be assumed. We become monogamous when and if we formally agree to such an arrangement. Until then, I won’t ask who else you’re dating or fucking and I expect the same respect from you.

6.If you’re squeamish about blood, get over it. I’m horny as hell on my period and I expect to get fucked at that time.

7.Don’t ask for oral sex unless you enjoy reciprocating. I love sucking cock and I only date guys who love eating pussy.

8.Relationships are about appreciating another person. It is NOT about meeting someone and changing them to fit some standard of perfection you have in your head. Don’t ask me to lose weight, cut my hair, get a better job, learn to cook better or change the way I dress. If you don’t like me for who I am, don’t date me. End of story. You don’t change me, I don’t change you. If you want to date a size 3 supermodel with a big bank account, then that’s who you should have asked out in the first place.

9.Don’t ask me to get rid of my friends, my family, or my pets. They were here before you and they will be here after you.

10.Don’t ask me to financially support you. I take care of myself, you should be able to do so as well.

 

[M's girl]

I have a list of rules that I normally share with any guy who asks me out...They're a bit blunt but if he reads them and is still interested, he might just be the right kind of guy for me

Wow! Very clear. Nice..... Does it work? May I ask?