Variations on a Theme

[Rybka]

I offer a new game or challenge. It consists of taking a poem by another and rewriting it as if it was your own. It differs from our "Same Title" challenges in that the idea this time is not to have a dozen different poems with only the title in common, but rather two (or more) different perspectives/styles of the same basic poetic theme/work.

My muse has been pretty comatose since I had a bout with the flu in late November. One of the exercises with which I have been trying to wake it up is to take a work that I wish I had written and rewrite it as if it really were mine. - Sometimes the rewritten/converted poem is almost unrecognizable. Sometimes it is hardly changed. Sometimes I just alter the emphasis or play with the spacing. (Does that surprise anyone?) The latest poem that I have done this exercise with is annaswirls' how does one throw away a flower?. ©

I of course asked Anna's permission before I would show it to anyone. She responded thusly:

I think that your thread could be very neat! My initial response was Cool! Of course, then I had this moment of doubt, hoping that it did not cause any hurt feelings to see one's poem reworked--- you know they are like our babies sometimes.

Following that analogy,

if someone takes your kid and gets them dressed up for a play at school, lets say, a pumpkin suit, it is cute.

If you send your kid to school wearing cut off shorts and a long hair cut and they come back wearing khakis and with a nice dapper hair style, now that is a different feeling you might get.

Does this make sense?

I trust you and believe that you would be doing this to have fun, to play, to exercise, but I just want to offer my two cents (not that you asked!) about the thread, to make sure when you start it that it is set up as an exercise in creativity, not in editing...... because I know that this is not what you intend, and I would hate for it to go that way.

I am honored that you have found my poems to be fun to play around with, and my answer is sure, go ahead. I think it is important that anyone who posts there ask permission from the writer, as you have.

I am already thinking of one I want to play with lol.

Have fun!

Anna

I will start the exercise off with my interpretation of Anna's poem. Feel free to comment on my rendition of her excellent poem and (with her permission) offer another, or find some other poem that you wish you had written, get permission (If it is by a Lit. poet or someone you know) and rewrite it as if it was a child of your own creative juices. - Please remember that this is not an exercise in editing, nor parody, but in honoring a work that you admire by showing how you would have made it your own.

how does one throw away a flower?

On my dusty dresser-
cut flowers in pottery vases
lined in descending order of decay
like moments of stop frame photography.

Petals and pollen fall to the floor.

If I had written Anna's lovely succinct poem it might have looked something like this (I have a heck of a time doing spacing on this forum!):

        Throwaways?

On a dusty dresser
cut flowers in water glasses
lined in decaying order
moments of stop
                       time
                photography

Petals and pollen
                    fallen

 

[Lauren Hynde]

This sounds very familiar!

Fuck With My Poem

 

[BooMerengue]

My bad! I misunderstood- sorry!

 

[Rybka]

Before this thread gets hijacked (If it already hasn't.), I must state that I didn't intend for authors to offer up a poem for 'fucking with'. Rather I wanted the rewriter to choose one (written by another) that they like enough to wish they had written (my highest accolade), and then write it as they would have if it was original to them, not in humor, but in homage.

Regards, Rybka

 

[obcy]

Variations on "how does..." by annaswirls

 

        * * * * . . .
 
        on my dresser
        a vase with flowers
        and a photograph
        of a dresser
        and a vase without flowers
        and a photograph by the vase
        of a dresser
        and a vase with flowers
        and a photo by the vase
        of a dresser
        and a vase without flowers
        and a photo by the vase
        ...
        ...
        i am thirsty

 

Regards,

 

[Angeline]

Before this thread gets hijacked (If it already hasn't.), I must state that I didn't intend for authors to offer up a poem for 'fucking with'. Rather I wanted the rewriter to choose one (written by another) that they like enough to wish they had written (my highest accolade), and then write it as they would have if it was original to them, not in humor, but in homage.

Regards, Rybka

Have a look at this thread on derivative poems that I posted some time back. It has some examples from famous and infamous (e.g., me) poets.

I like this idea, Rybka, and agree with you that it's an hommage. Other poets like the late Ted Berrigan, the great writer from the 2nd generation of the New York School of poets (e.g., Kenneth Koch, Ron Padgett, etc.) advocated this as a way to keep writing when the spirit isn't moving you.

 

[Senna Jawa]

To write variations (not rewrites) was a way to honor the poets of the past (or the contemporaries too) two thousand years ago too, and more or less, with different intensity, always.