Use of comma for movement after dialogue

[elsol]

Question: Appropriateness of using a comma in certain instances of action post dialogue.


Examples:

"I fucking hate her!" she said slamming her hand against the table.


"Oh please!" he said dismissing her words with wave.


----


I prefer no comma after said... but some people are correcting me to use a comma making these.

"I fucking hate her!" she said, slamming her hand against the table.

"Oh please," he said, dismissing her words with a wave.


---- Any rules of thumb here... the comma seems incorrect to me.


Sincerely,

ElSol

 

[snooper]

... Any rules of thumb here... the comma seems incorrect to me. ...

It is neither right, nor wrong!

Punctuation is a set of signposts to mark meaning or pronunciation. You put one in here, or not, to indicate whether you want the reader to think a slight pause.

To find where you need commas, just read the piece aloud. Where you pause for a moment, put a comma. Where you pause for a little longer, put a full stop. Where you pause for breath, put a new paragraph.

In your two examples I would put one. In here I would not:

"FIRE!" he shouted rushing out of the room.

That is because I want the reader to feel the urgency. No time to pause for anything.

 

[BlackShanglan]

While understanding snooper's point on the flexibility of language, the "rule" is to use a comma before a participle phrase (verb in the "ing" form acting as a modifier). That's probably why people are suggesting you use the comma. It's not the dialogue that's the issue - at least not in your examples. It's the verbal that follows it. That said, modern trends are toward allowing elimination of the comma as a stylistic device; it's hazy territory. Many would say that the following sentences are both punctuated correctly; others would say only the first.

He ran across the bridge, yelling like a lunatic.

He ran across the bridge yelling like a lunatic.

The verbal phrase is the participle ("yelling") plus its modifying terms. They all, as a phrase, modify "ran."

Shanglan

 

[brightlyiburn]

Comma rules have changed, actually.
It depends on the impact you're going for.
I've found reading something and paying close attention to the commas helps me decide how I want to do things.
Generally I find stories that stick commas everywhere they could concievably be to be completely annoying. More and more authors are dropping those extra commas.

In your case, I would use a comma. If there is an action after speaking, use a comma. If there is an adjective describing how the sentence was spoken, don't use a comma.

 

[BlackSnake]

I disagree that comma rules have changed. Citing Strunk Jr. and White's "The Elements of Style" if the interruption to the flow of the sentence is but slight, the commas may be safely omitted.

 

[snooper]

I disagree that comma rules have changed. Citing Strunk Jr. and White's "The Elements of Style" if the interruption to the flow of the sentence is but slight, the commas may be safely omitted.

For the umpteenth time, Strunk and White is a book for journalists about how to write for newspapers. It does not set out to advise writes of literature.

 

[BlackSnake]

For the umpteenth time, Strunk and White is a book for journalists about how to write for newspapers. It does not set out to advise writes of literature.

I think its a really cool quick reference guide for the $5.95 I paid.

BTW, Strunk taught at Carnell.....*Chuckles*

 

[brightlyiburn]

I disagree that comma rules have changed. Citing Strunk Jr. and White's "The Elements of Style" if the interruption to the flow of the sentence is but slight, the commas may be safely omitted.

I fail to see how that proves that the comma rules haven't changed. In fact, that supports that comma rules have changed. Used to be taught that no matter what there had to be a comma, but not anymore.

 

[BlackSnake]

I fail to see how that proves that the comma rules haven't changed. In fact, that supports that comma rules have changed. Used to be taught that no matter what there had to be a comma, but not anymore.

I guess it depends where you were taught. As far back as the sixth grade commas were to be use to signafy a pause in a sentence, before a conjunction introducing an independent clause, and in a series of two or more terms with a single conjunction. Rules are still unchanged. Nothing here indicate change.

 

[snooper]

IBTW, Strunk taught at Carnell.....

If you mean Cornell, that's no great recommendation. Even I have lectured there!

 

[BlackSnake]

If you mean Cornell, that's no great recommendation. Even I have lectured there!

LMAO....I take it that, there is no love lost there.

 

[snooper]

I take it that, there is no love lost there.

I didn't say that, merely implied that lecturing there is no great distinction.

To get back to the topic of this thread, the comma in your posting is just plain wrong! Nobody pauses for breath there, and it does not clarify to the meaning.

 

[flyer333]

If it sounds good...

I have no traditional higher level education in English. I used to read copious volumes of history books in my younger years, but the web has since displaced such reading. I would be hard pressed to differentiate a noun from a verb, and forget that partici-thing somebody mentioned in an earlier post.

I just inherently know what sounds natural to me. I think it's because all the reading that I did in my past. With no studying I successfully CLEP'ed 6 hours of English Writing just by that feeling of what sounded good

 

[Seattle Zack]

elsol, I would say that the commas are needed in your two sentences. However, a better alternative might be to eliminate the "he said/she said" thing altogether.

"I fucking hate her!" She slammed her hand against the table.

"Oh please!" He dismissed her words with a wave.

 

[Captain Midnight]

Eats, Shoots and Leaves

The book Eats, Shoots and Leaves, by an Egnlish author, is a big bestseller in hardcover and is available for everyone who reads the English language. She writes from a "stickler"'s point of view, setting rules for every major punctuation mark. I'll look in my copy to see how she would treat the sentence in question.

 

[bellr1nger]

While understanding snooper's point on the flexibility of language, the "rule" is to use a comma before a participle phrase (verb in the "ing" form acting as a modifier). That's probably why people are suggesting you use the comma. It's not the dialogue that's the issue - at least not in your examples. It's the verbal that follows it. That said, modern trends are toward allowing elimination of the comma as a stylistic device; it's hazy territory. Many would say that the following sentences are both punctuated correctly; others would say only the first.

He ran across the bridge, yelling like a lunatic.

He ran across the bridge yelling like a lunatic.

The verbal phrase is the participle ("yelling") plus its modifying terms. They all, as a phrase, modify "ran."

Shanglan

But in the second example who is yelling?

 

[minsue]

But in the second example who is yelling?

The bridge, it would seem.

 

[Winemaster]

the comma's

Hoping there aren't too little



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