Topless Jen Chapter 1

[ShirtlessMike05]

Topless Jen

Chapter 1: Topless at the Beach

This is the first part of what I hope to be a multi chapter story about a girl named Jen. Here she is about 18 years old and is new to the whole world of exhibitionism and sex but has a strong desire to go topless in public.

Jen has sort of dirty blonde hair and big blue eyes with dark eyebrows. She is average height but is slim because she stays in shape. Jen has small but firm breasts and has big pink nipples. Her pussy is shaved. She has long slender legs and usually bare feet with pink toenails.

This first chapter of the story has Jen going to the beach with her friend Crystal whos this sort of wild person herself but isnt quite as daring as Jen is with things like going topless. Shes mostly a thonger mean she likes wearing thongs and showing off her ass and lower bits. Crystal wants to encourage Jen to go topless and expand her limits. I want to focus on Jen and her innate desire to want to go topless in public and have fun doing it.

This is totally a work of fiction. The location where she lives is supposed to be a beach town. Enjoy the story and look forward to further adventures of Jen in the future.

Chapter 1: First Time Topless

Jen woke up in the morning at 7am. She rubbed her eyes as she sat up and looked down at her naked body. Her pale white breasts and shaved pussy stood out in stark contrast to her slender tanned body. During the summer Jen almost always wore bikinis so besides her breasts and pussy the rest of her was entirely in the sun. It didnt take Jen long to get out of bed as she didnt have any covers on over her since it gets so hot in the summer. Jen felt so good being naked and unrestricted from clothing at home, especially when she slept. Her bladder felt full from her long sleep so she scurried into the bathroom to releive herself. When she got out of the bathroom she heard her phone ring and went to pick it up. Crystal, Jen's best friend was on the other end.

"Hey girl, what have you got planned today?"

"Nothing really, just was going to relax here at home. i dont have to work for a few days" Jen answered.

Jen had a small office job that she did during the week to pay for the appartment she lived in and for some spending money.

Crystal wasnt impressed and was not about to let her best friend just lay around all day, especially since she had something better in mind.

"How about we go down to the beach and get some sun?"

Jen always liked to go to the beach on her days off.

"Sure, ive got this new blue string bikini I want to try out."

"Great, im going to wear my white bikini with the thong bottoms" Crystal told Jen mischeviously.

Jen had often thought of wearing a thong on a public beach but feared people seeing her ass and pussy even though she enjoyed being naked in private so she opted for a full string bikini instead.

"That will look great on you Crystal." Jen answered.

"You should try it sometime girl."

"Maybe sometime, im gonna stick with these ones for now"

"Oh okay, your loss. See ya in a bit." Crystal said before hanging up the phone.

Jen has a smile on her face as she walks to her dresser. She opens the dresser and inside are lots of different brightly colored clothes. If anything Jen definitely has a thing for flashy clothing. Most of them are bikinis because since she lives near a beach town whenever shes not going to work or someplace formal she wears one of her favorite bikinis.

She pulls her blue bikini out and holds it up to her naked body in the mirror. Since she is always active and likes to run alot Jen has a slim figure. Jen takes the bottoms and sticks her feet inside as she slides them up her slender legs. She pulls them up to her waist over her pussy and makes sure they are straight. Jen doesnt want to accidentally flash her pussy at anyone. Her bikini bottoms are so small they barely cover her pussy in the front and in the back cover just her ass leaving her entire legs bare. Jen models them topless in the mirror looking at her slender body.

She notices her small white breasts with her soft pink nipples that stand out from her tanned torso. If it were left up to her Jen would prefer to just forego the bikini top and go topless so she could rid herself of her tanlines at least on her breasts but being relatively new to this town since she moved out of her parents home at 18 she doesnt want to take any chances of being arrested for indecent exposure.

So Jen reluctantly takes her bikini top and slides the cups in place over her breasts which barely cover her areolas and nipples and ties the strings behind her back and neck. Its a smaller bikini than she wore when living with her parents but now that shes on her own she loves it because she can show more with it and thats why its her favorite bikini. This means of course much of her boobs on the sides are still white but she hopes to change that soon.

Jen knows Crystal will be there soon to pick her up and take them to the beach so she muddles around trying to decide what else to wear. Since Jen and Crystal will probably spend most of the day at the beach and not do anything else she decides not to wear a shirt over her bikini and just wear the top. She does decide to wear some jean shorts over her bottoms on the ride to the beach though not wanting to take any chances with the bottom half. Jen likes these jeans because they are so small and barely cover her ass in the back and her crotch in the front leaving almost all of her legs bare.

Before leaving Jen decides whether she should wear any shoes or not but knowing she wont be wearing them very much anyways just opts to go barefoot. Whenever possible Jen loves to go barefoot because she hates shoes and only wears them to work and the few places that wont let her in without any footwear. She only has one pair for work and the rest are just flip flops or sandals.

Soon Crystal arrives at the door and knocks on it. Jen grabs her small purse with some money in it and other necessities. She answers the door and open it. On the other side Crystal stands there in her white thong bikini. Jen is astonished.

"Wow Crystal, thats all you wore here?" Jen asks.

Crystal gives her a funny look and says "Sure why not? We're just going to the beach."

"Besides youre looking pretty free yourself. Youre the one who has been wearing a shirt and shoes the past few weeks besides the time you spent at the beach."

Jen answers "Well I didnt want to push my luck until I was sure about things around here but people seem pretty liberal."

Crystal just shrugged her shoulders "Yeah pretty awesome isnt it? You could probably just skip wearing the shorts and just wear the bikini. Im in my thong after all."

"Thats okay, not this time I would rather have something to put on in case I lose my bottoms. You know how I feel about my privates being exposed in public."

"Whatever floats your boat girl. You ready to roll?" Crystal asks hurriedly.

"Yes, lets go" Jen says as she closes her door and follows Crystal downstairs to her car.As Jen walks along the floor she loves the feeling of the carpet against her bare feet. She feels so excited knowing that she is going outside finally just wearing her bikini and her favorite shorts and nothing else.

When they get outside the two bikini clad girls hop into Crystal's blue convertible. Jen is amazed at the sight of Crystal's car.

"When did you get this?" Jen asks Crystal curiously.

"I got this last year when I moved here. My parents wanted to get rid of it since they have this new SUV now."

"Thats cool. Must be fun to ride around and feel the warm air and the sun on your body." Jen said.

"It sure does. Alot of the time I like to go to the beach or out shopping in it." Crystal said excitedly.

Soon Crystal and Jen were off driving along the road towards the beach. The warm air whooshing past them as Crystal drives the car fast down the street. Jen loves the feeling of it against her body and feels it as the wind tugs against her bikini. She has to grab it to hold it in place so it doesnt come loose and blow away. Part of her wishes her top would come off so she could have an excuse to go topless but she is still nervous about getting in trouble with the cops.

Crystal's bikini is more full on top so she doesnt have as much trouble keeping it on as she concentrates on driving. Jen envies her a bit but likes the freedom her bikini offers even though she has to constantly adjust it to keep her firm white tits from popping out. Crystal sees Jen trying to adjust her bikini and attempts to get her mind on something else.

"So Jen meet any cute guys here yet?"

"No, not yet. I havent been here long enough to meet any." Jen says calmly.

"We'll have to do something about that. Maybe youll run into some at the beach. Should be some real studs there." Crystal tells her.

Jen shrugs her shoulders and catches her bikini just as one of her perky nipples almost pops out. She quickly readjusts it and says "Maybe, all I really want to do is relax and enjoy the beach."

"Dont worry, we will have a good time there together. I promise." Crystal says as she takes her best friend's hand before she grabs her bikini to adjust it again.

"You really should just leave your top alone, its not like your boobs are gonna pop out suddenly and even if they do, who cares, just go with it." Crystal tells her nervous friend.

"I will I just dont want to get in any trouble with the law." Jen says as she winks her big blue eyes.

"Dont worry about them. Not enough of them at this beach anyways and in any case ill keep an eye out for you." Crystal tells her reassuredly.

"We're almost there." Crystal exclaims as she pulls off the road and into a small parking lot. Theres only a few cars in it and not any people. Crystal and Jen both sigh and breathe in the cool ocean breeze as Crystal turns off the convertible and opens the door. As Jen gets out Crystal looks at her and asks "Now that we're here do you want to leave your shorts in the car?" Jen looks at her nervously, she knows she wants to wear as little as possible but is still skittish about having so little covering her bottoms.

She looks at Crystal and sees her get impatient and decides "what the hell" and drops her shorts. She steps out of them and leaves them in the trunk of the car. Now theres no turning back as Crystal locks it.

"There, feel better now? Nothing to worry about the trunk will be locked so nobody will steal your shorts." Crystal tells her.

They both grab their purses and some towels as they walk down the stairs to the beach. When they reach the beach the two see lots of beachgoers laying out in the sun and splashing around in the water. Most are wearing bikinis and in the guys case just speedos. Alot of the women have thongs on but none are topless yet.

Crystal looks at Jen and says "See, all these girls are wearing thongs. You couldve done it too."

Jen seeing all the thongers feels a little better but still is glad at least "this" time that she has her full bikini bottoms on, even if they are just strings with a couple of small patches on them. She wishes there were some topless women but since its a public beach she isnt surprised. Crystal and Jen lay out their towels and sit down on them.

Crystal sticks her head back and smiles as she enjoys being at the beach. Jen decides to lay down on her stomach to start getting a tan. Crystal watches as Jen lays there and says "eager to get your tan today?'

Jen looks over at her and says "yeah I want to be able to keep this golden brown tan of mine"

"Im surprised you have one considering how little youve gone without the shirt outside since you got here."

"Ive still gone to the beach in my bikini a few times and I like to sun out by the pool at my apartment alot so I havent worn the shirt the whole time just out doing errands and stuff." Jen says.

"Bet youre glad to realize that you dont need it anymore like you did before when you lived with your parents" Crystal says to Jen as she continues to lay on her towel.

"It does feel good to be out on my own so now I can just wear the bikini top wherever I please and not bother with a shirt unless necessary."

"Lets hope it doesnt become necessary anymore. You look better in the bikini."

"I feel much better. I prefer wearing a bikini top during the summer when its hot out rather than a shirt. I would go topless more places if I thought I could." Jen tells Crystal.

"That would be a sight to see for sure." Crystal said
"I dont think I could do that. Im more of a thonger myself."

"Oh well maybe someday." Jen sighs

"Why not right now? We're on the beach and nobodys around. Just untie your top and lay there. Youve done that before." Crystal tells her.

Jen looks around and doesnt see too many people. Most are further down the beach or splashing in the water. So she reaches behind her and unties the strings on her back and her neck and lets them fall to her sides. Her back bare and tan except for the thin lines where her bikini strings covered.

Crystal looks over at Jen as she lays there looking at the ocean with her torso bare. She notices the thin lines on Jen's back.

"Oh my! girl! You havent got much time out in the sun without a top have you? Need to do something about those tan lines." Crystal tells Jen.

"I havent really got around to tanning outside without a top yet. Im still getting used to being back in my bikinis most of the time." Jen says as she lifts up off the towel slightly to look at Crystal. Her small firm breasts hanging from her body with her soft pink nipples poking out at the end.

"Seems like youre getting into the swing of things with going topless."

"Yeah it feels good to finally be without the top even if its just to lay here and tan." Jen says as she pulls the bikini top from under her and sets it next to herself.

Crystal looks impressed with how Jen is so casual about going topless when before she never wore anything less than a bikini outside. Crystal wishes she had the nerve to go topless, it took her quite a while just to get up the guts to wear thongs in public. She decides to up the ante a bit.

"Hey Jen, want to go for a swim?" Crystal asks Jen curiously.

"Yeah sure, ill grab my top." Jen says as she turns to her side and covers her small titties with her arm as she reaches for her bikini top.

Crystal decides this is not the reaction she was hoping for and tries to say something before Jen loses her stride.

"Dont bother, just go topless. Its only a quick dip." Crystal tells her.

Jen feels nervous inside. She knows this is the response she was always hoping for having someone actually urge her to take the plunge and go topless but at the same time she wonders how people will react to her going topless in public.

Before she can change her mind Jen stands up and thrusts out her breasts proudly with her nipples pointing straight out, hard with anticipation. Jen tries not to think of the people around her as she walks towards the sea. Crystal smiles as they walk calmy down to the ocean. One of them in a white bikini with a thong and one of them topless with only a small blue bikini bottom on. Jen fights the urge to put her hands over her breasts to cover her perky pink nipples but keeps them at her sides. She doesnt want to show any hesitation.

They finally reach the water and Jen quickly jumps in until her breasts are below the water. Crystal starts splashing around in the water and almost gets knocked over by a wave. When she gets back up she has to readjust her bikini top so her breasts dont pop out. Even though Crystal has a more full bikini top she also has slightly bigger breasts than Jen so she has more trouble keeping them in because they bounce around alot while Jen's are smaller and more firm. Jen looks at Crystal and laughs as she tries to keep her breasts covered.

"Why dont you just remove the top and go bare like me?" Jen asks her friend.

"Oh no, im not adventureous like you, the most extreme I can do is wear a thong but topless is too much for me. This bikini top is pretty daring as it is."

"Youre the one who encouraged me to bare all here and now im topless with my tits hanging out and my full perky nipples for all to see." Jen says as she pulls her slender body above the water so her pale white breasts are exposed.

"Thats because I knew you love that and you have the body for it and wouldnt mind not wearing a top at the beach." Crystal tells her.

Jen looks at her and puts her hands on her sides as she stands there looking at her teasing Crystal with her ample breasts almost in her face. While she is doing this Jen doesnt notice this huge wave hit both of them and knock them down. Crystal catches herself but Jen being smaller and more petite gets slammed by the wave and falls in the water. She gets up and looks at Crystal as she tries to get the hair out of her face and the water from her eyes. Jen takes Crystal's hand as she stumbles and tries to catch her balance.

"Are you alright?" Jen asks Crystal as she stands there with a concerned look on her face. Crystal rights herself and looks at Jen with a shocked expression in her eyes. Jen cant understand why shes looking at her that way.

"Whats wrong? Why are you look at me like that?" Jen asks as she crosses her arms in front of her under her breasts still leaving them bare.

"Jen I dont know how to tell you this girl but......youre naked."

"What?" Jen looks astonished as she gazes down and realizes that Crystal is right. Her entire body is bare down to her feet. Jen's shaved pussy is exposed for all to see and her bikini bottoms are at her feet.

"Oh my god!" Jen shouts as she immediately takes a hand and puts it on her pussy covering her little white slit with her hand still leaving her untanned boobs completely exposed.

"Girl you should pull your bottoms up before the next wave hits and you lose them." Crystal says worriedly.

"Right......" Jen says sheepishly as she thinks about how shes gonna do this without giving everyone a show. Of course shes already given anyone who can see her a show since shes been standing there for the past few seconds with her pale white titties and her completely shaved pussy totally exposed for anyone to see. She knows she doesnt have all day as the next wave approaches and Jen can see its a big one and will probably make her lose her bottoms completely and then she would be naked, something which she just cannot handle. So horrified she moves her trembling hand from her throbbing clit and reaches down to grab her bottoms.

Theyre wet and water logged so it takes some effort to pull them up but finally she gets them up and over her hips and finally gets her pussy and most of her ass covered. Some of her crotch in the front is still exposed but since she shaved down there her slit is still covered so she doesnt worry about the rest of her white areas being shown and of course since she doesnt have her bikini top her breasts remain uncovered.

Jen immediately puts her hand on her chest to contain her beating heart as she tries to calm down from her first nude exposure in public. Just after she got her bottoms safely up the next wave hits, luckily its smaller than the last one and only shakes her up a bit but she still grabs her bottoms with her other hand to make sure they stay up. Crystal was prepared and doesnt even flinch during that wave.

Jen looks at Crystal with her hand still over her chest. "I think thats enough fun in the sea for one day." Crystal looks at her and agrees, not wanting to shock her friend with another ordeal of that nature.....at least for now.

With luck noone saw her little nude moment and Jen walks back with Crystal to her towel. While they walk Jen looks around nervously, being consciously aware more now how exposed she really is and how vulnerable she is. She is happy to be topless but at the same time knows how close she is to being completely naked. Secretly it was a thrill for her flashing her white pussy with her pink clit exposed like that but on the outside she is trembling because those are her most intimate parts and she is just not ready to take that leap yet.

Safely at their towel, Jen sits down and pulls her knees up to her breasts as she wraps her arms around them. She looks at Crystal and says "that was the most humilating experience today."

"Yeah that was pretty intense for me too." Crystal tells her. 'I mean I just looked over at you and saw that everything was out there clear as day and you could easily tell your breasts and pussy from everything else since theyre still so white."

"I really need to spend more time topless getting rid of my tanlines." Jen says.

Crystal looks at her and smiles. "I think we can take care of that."

"Really?"

"Yes, to start I think we should put your bikini top in the car so you can spend the day topless and not get tempted to put it on." Crystal says as she takes Jen's bikini top and folds it up.

Jen looks at her nervously as she takes away her only other peice of clothing she has besides her shorts which are in the car. She knows that Crystal is trying to push her limits and that once she puts the top away Jen will be commited and wont be able to cover her breasts for the rest of the day.

"I really do want to go topless and its something ive been waiting for a long while to do its just this is a big step for me." Jen says.

Crystal tells her "Dont worry, going topless is perfectly legal here, I checked and lots of girls do it. I havent seen any yet today but im sure more will come in the next few days."

Jen just shrugs her shoulders and lays down on the towel on her back as she sticks her breasts out and her now hard nipples point straight up. "Im going to get some rays and rest a bit here."

"Thats okay, im gonna go to the car and put this away and then we can get a bite to eat." Crystal says as she trots off with Jen's top.

Jen cringes a bit as she doesnt even know what Crystal means by that but she puts it out of her mind as she gets some sleep. When she wakes up, Jen looks around for Crystal. Shes nowhere to be seen. Jen gets up on her feet with a million thoughts going through mind about Crystal leaving her here topless in just her bikini bottoms and having to walk all the way home with only a tiny bikini on. She keeps looking around and finally sees Crystal waving to her and gesturing her to come across the beach to where she is.

Jen runs topless across the beach to where Crystal is and brought her purse with her since she had to walk so far and didnt want anyone to take it. "Good thing you brought your purse." Crystal says to Jen as she takes her hand and walks her to the street near the boardwalk.

"I just didnt want anyone to take it since I had to walk all the way here and I wasnt sure what we had planned." Jen tells her.

"I told you we could grab a bite to eat after I went back to the car."

"Why didnt you just let me keep my top then?" Jen exclaims.

"Because you wont need it and besides im trying to help you with your tan."

"Crystal, the beach is one thing but if im going to get lunch with you I cant just walk in with my boobs hanging out like this, ill get thrown out." Jen says as she cups her bare breasts in her hands and they wobble a bit.

"Sure you can, its by the beach and besides im in my thong." Crystal says impatiently wanting to get some grub.

"Thongs are one thing, my nipples are here for all to see."

"Oh stop being such a baby, you know youve always wanted to do this." Crystal looks at her with a smile full of mischeif.

Jen knows she is right so before she loses her nerve she follows Crystal across the street. Jen can see everyone looking at her bare breasts and nipples that are now hard as rocks. She tries to look confident and get across the street quickly as possible.

Soon they arrive at the restaurant which is actually a little snack shop with a indoor eating area. Jen sees two girls in bikinis and a shirtless guy walk out. She feels a little better but to her theres a difference between a shirtless guy and her being topless. Jen knows she cant back out now so she reaches out and opens the door.

A big gust of wind from the a/c blows on her naked torso as she opens the door and she wraps her arms around herself as she realizes how cold it is inside. Now she definitely wishes she kept her top, not that it would do much about the cool air inside. It reminds her how exposed she is. Still the cool air feels good since its so hot outside. Jen quickly gets used to the cool breeze inside and puts her arms down leaving her body on display for everyone inside. Crystal comes in behind her and quickly guides Jen to the counter.

The cashier a lady in her 30's stands there in awe taking in the topless beauty before her. She cant beleive a topless woman finally came into her store. The woman looks Jen up and down noting her tan body that stands in stark contrast to her still pale white tits with her soft pink nipples that are now harder and more pronounced because of the air inside and the fact that this woman is staring at her as she bares all.

"Wow, never thought someone would have the guts to come in here like that." The cashier told Jen. You look beautiful.

Jen blushes a bit and says "well actually I was afraid that youd ask me to put a top on or leave."

"Put a top on? Of course not, this is the beach and ive got no problem with you topless in here. In fact alot of girls come in here not wearing much more than you are now." She points at two girls sitting at a table wearing bikinis that are so small the tops barely cover their nipples. "If you ask me those tops are silly, they show so much the girls might as well just go topless and leave their nipples uncovered."

"I always thought so too and in the end when you think about it its really quite silly." Jen smiles as she leans forward so her breasts hang out in front of her.

"Youre gonna be a trend setter girl." Crystal tells her very topless friend.

"My name is Teri, So what can I get you hon?" Teri asks Jen and Crystal.

"We'll have a couple of sandwiches with some fries and sodas." Jen says as she reaches down to get her money and forgets she isnt wearing any pants and thus doesnt have pockets.

"That will be $14 hon." Teri tells Jen.

Jen fumbles around in her purse for a few minutes all the while her pale breasts jiggling around slightly in front of her. Finally she pulls some money out and hands it to Teri.
The lady hands her some change and Jen just to be a little naughty sticks the money in her bikini bottoms.

"Nice place to put it, itll be real safe there." Teri smiles as she gets a breif glimpse of Jen's bare pussy.

Jen normally doesnt do that but since Teri was so nice to her and accepting of her topless state she figured shed show how much she appreciated that. Besides shes sure that Teri has seen alot more in her day.

She still cant beleive that she is in the middle of the little restaurant without any top. Jen scurries off to a table with Crystal and sits down. The floor tiles cool beneath her bare feet. Jen pulls the money out of her bottoms and puts it in her purse. Theyre sitting right behind the girls in the bikinis. Jen can hear them talking as they eat.

"Did you see that topless chick that came in here with her friend? I cant beleive she came in here without a top." the girl in the pink bikini said to her friend.

"I wish I had the nerve to do that, totally." The other girl in the tiny red thong bikini said.

"Well why dont you?, it is the beach after all and that other skinny chick came in here not even wearing one. I dont even think she had a top with her to put on."

"I cant do that, my boobs are too big, everyone will see them with my huge areolas and nipples."

"Girl they can see all of that anyways your bikini top is a joke, it doesnt even cover anything." The girl in the pink bikini told her friend.

"I guess youre right, ive just never exposed my breasts in public before." the red thonger told her as she removed her bikini top and stuffed it in her purse. Her huge boobs popped out of their barely concealing top. They were more tan than Jen's were as they were bigger and more exposed in that top but still quite a bit of them were still white as day. She immediately put her hands over her large nipples.

The girl in the pink bikini undid her top and removed it. Her breasts being smaller than her friends huge melons they were still quite big compared to Jen's. She put her bikini top in her bag. Both of them now sat there topless with just their tiny bottoms on, especially the one in the red thong who might as well have been naked. Teri looked over at them and gave them an approving nod.

The girl in the red thong continued to hold her huge breasts out of fear someone might see. Her friend thought she was nuts.

"Woman, put your hands down. Your bikini covered less than your hands do and you look embarassing." She told her busty friend. Her friend complies and puts her hands down so her huge brown nipples are on display.

"Good, you cant eat that way anyways." The pink girl says as she chows down on her sandwich totally unfased by her ample tan breasts with her tiny nipples hanging out there in front of her as she eats.

Jen looks back from hearing all the commotion and sees the two girls in the bikinis now topless and eating their meal. She smiles knowing now that shes not the only topless person here.

Crystal looks up from her meal and sees the two girls behind her topless friend and notices too that theyre also both quite topless.

"See I told you that youd be a trend setter today." Crystal says as she puts her hand on Jen's bare shoulder.

"I guess youre right, im really getting into this topless thing." Jen smiles as she proudly sticks her breasts out not caring who might see them.

The two girls behind Jen notice her sitting there behind them and excited about her brazeness with going topless get up from their seats and come over to Jen's table.

"Wow girl! That took some guts. We didnt think anyone had the nerve to just walk in here without their bikini top on with their tits and nipples bare like you." The girls both tell Jen.

Jen smiles at their approval and says " I didnt have a top with me and I was hungry so I thought I might as well go for it. Seems like you got brave and took the plunge too." Looking at the two topless girls and loving how despite their bigger breasts and more prominent nipples both of the girls seems to be so comfortable now that they werent wearing their tops anymore.

"Yeah I dont know why we didnt do this years ago."

"Hey, would it be possible for us to sit and eat with you gals?" The pink bikini girl asks Jen.

Jen smiles and says "Sure, have a seat." She scoots over and lets the pink girl in while Crystal moves over on the other side so her big boobed friend in the red thong could sit next to her.

"Did you even bring a top with you to the beach today?" The red thong girl asks Jen.

"Yes but my friend had me put it in the trunk of her car so I could enjoy being topless all day without the temptation to put it on so now im completely topless and couldnt put one on even if I wanted to which I can say honestly now I dont." Jen says as she cups her breasts and holds them together.

"What are your names?" Crystal asks the two girls.

"Oh my name is Kathy and this is Jill." the pink girl says to her friend.

"Nice to meet you two." Jen says. "What brings you here?"

"We're just here to enjoy the beach and do some shopping." Jill tells Jen.

"Same thing with us, although im not sure how much shopping we'll do." Jen says as she opens her arms and shows her bare breasts.

"Oh dont worry about that. No shop here is gonna hassle you about that. We've seen a few girls go into some of the shops topless we just never got the courage to do it ourselves until now." Kathy said to Jen.

"Actually now that you inspired us to remove our tops we might just continue our shopping bare breasted and not even put our tops back on." Kathy tells her.

"I dont know about that..." Jill says kind of sheepishly as she tries to hide her breasts a bit.

"Oh cmon itll be fun and besides where else can you show your breasts everywhere without anyone caring? You already took your top off in front of these two fine ladies and one of them is already bare." Kathy tells her squeamish friend.

Jill reluctantly agrees and so they decide after their meal to do some shopping. Jen looks at Crystal as she eats and gives her kind of a curious look. Crystal stops eating and looks at Jen wondering why she is staring at her like that.

"Whats wrong? Why are you staring at me like that?"

"Oh I was just wondering if youd like to join in on us and go topless since we're all doing it?" Jen asks quizzily.

Crystal doesnt know what to do. She has three topless girls looking at her in her white two peice bikini and suddenly feels out of place.

"I dont usually do the topless thing....but when in Rome." Crystal says as she unties her bikini top and puts it on the table.

Jen likes what she sees. Crystal has medium sized breasts, not as small as Jen's but not as big as Jill's or Kathy's. Before Jen can take Crystal's top she puts her hand on it.

"Only while we're here on the beach and then im putting it back on." Crystal says to Jen. She knows better than to argue with Crystal about it now but thinks she will convince her friend to go topless more in the future.

The girls finish their meals and thank Teri then they take their purses and walk outside. When they open the door Jen is the first to feel the heat hit her for the first time since they walked in to the snack joint.

"Damn its gotten hot out here. Good thing I got you girls to take your tops off." Jen tells her friends.

"Youre right, it feels alot better now that we're all bare, thanks Jen." Kathy says as she looks at the 3 of them and enjoys how pretty they look with their breasts loose without being restricted by any cloth.

They walk down the street a ways watching other people go by them on the sidewalk and take double glances at them when they realize all 4 of the girls are topless without a top in sight. Several cars honk their horns as they go down the street. Jen grabs her breasts and shakes them as one car drives by a guy yells out the window at her. She jumps and stick her arms in the air joyfully at the guy's excitement seeing her topless.

"I love being topless!" Jen exclaims. The others look at her like shes a changed woman.

"So, ready to burn all your tops and go topless completely from now on?" Kathy asks with a curious eye.

"I dont know if id go quite that far...yet but I would definitely leave the tops at home most of the time." Jen says as she holds her breasts together and smiles at the girls.

They all laugh as they continue walking past a few stores until they reach a bikini shop with some interesting suits in the window.

"Wow, I like that thong in the window!' Jen says as she sees a yellow thong bikini hanging there. She has been wanting to get up the nerve to wear a thongi in public since she started almost wearing bikinis exclusively in the summer but because of her bottom-phobia she just hasnt got up the courage to do it.

"If you like that thong so much you should go in and buy it." Crystal tells her. Jen's friends all look at her like theyre eager to go in and look around too.

"Its interesting we're all topless and here we are going to shop for bikinis. Thats certainly a twist." Jen says as she crosses her arms over her body leaving her small breasts bare.

"Lets go in and see what else theyve got." Kathy says to Jen and the others. "Ive been wanting to get another bikini to go along with this one."

Jen grabs the door and they walk inside. The shopkeeper looks up and is surprised to see 4 topless beauties walking in at the same time. He knows this is his lucky day.

"Hello ladies, can I help you today? We have an excellent set of bikini tops on sale."

"Oh thats okay, we're just fine topless. We really want to see what bottoms you have on sale. Specifically what thongs you have." Jen tells the shopkeeper.

"Excellent and my name is Joe by the way."

"Nice to meet you, Joe." Crystal tells him.

Joe leads the 4 bare breasted ladies over to the window and pulls out a couple of bottoms for them to look at. One of them is the yellow one Jen was eyeing.

"Here, we have this lovely yellow thong that is really good for those of you who love minimal swimwear which I can tell from you very busty ladies that you do." "Also we have this beautiful green bikini bottom in case you want a little more coverage of your....assets!" Joe says with a smile.

Jen takes the yellow thong and holds it up and places it against her blue bikini bottom. The thong seems to fit quite nicely over her shaven patch. She smiles as she is eager to try it on. Kathy looks at the green bikini and loves how shiny it is. They both look at Joe.

"So ladies have you made your decision?" Joe asks the two girls.

"Yes we have, I want to try on the yellow thong and Kathy there wants the green bikini." Jen tells him holding her hands behind her back totally unconcerned about the fact that her chest is totally bare in front of Joe.

"Wonderful choice ladies. We have a single changing room back here. Since we're such a small store we only have one room. You ladies can go in one at a time.

Kathy looks at Joe and asks "Do you have any matching tops for this bikini?"

Joe looks at her puzzled seeing her bare breasts hanging there. He stays professional though and says " Well yes we do, but theyre sold seperately. We have the tops over there on the wall."

Kathy walks over and looks at the tops. When she sees the prices her heart sinks. "Damn, theyre too much! Oh hell im already topless and I really dont need one down here anyways so ill just get the bottoms." Kathy walks back to the changing rooms.

Jen walks up to Kathy and says "If you help me get this thong ill help pay for a top for you. Im not going to buy a top with mine since I like going topless and wont need it."

Kathy ponders her suggestion. As much as Kathy enjoys going topless she thinks she should at least have a matching top in case she goes somewhere she feels like wearing a full bikini.

Its a deal." Kathy says as she shakes Jen's hand.

"Wonderful. Kathy you can change first." Joe hands her the green bikini and she goes inside to change.

While Kathy is changing Jen decides she wants to try on the yellow thong. She gets adventurous and asks Joe. "Would it be alright if I just changed back here? Nobody's here and I want to try my new thong out and I figured itd go faster this way?" Jen looks at him with her cutest puppy dog eyes.

"Umm...well normally girls dont change on the floor here but since nobody else is here and I could never turn down eyes like that......sure you can change here. Just do it in the back of the store so nobody sees you naked."

Jen smiles as she quickly pulls down her blue bikini and slips it off her long legs leaving her completely naked with her small clit in full view of everyone in the store. She turns her back to the front of the store so if anyone comes in all they see is her ass and dont get a full frontal. Jen is still afraid of anyone besides her friends here and maybe the store owner Joe seeing her pussy.

Crystal having been looking around the store for bikinis didnt notice the most recent series of events. She looks to the back of the store and sees her 3 friends with Joe talking but then something catches her eye, one of them seems to be missing her bottoms. Crystal gasps in shock.

"Jen! Youre naked! In the store!" She looks at Jen and eyeballs Jen's bare pussy as she turns around in response to Crystal's comment and stands there with her pale white breasts hanging out and her throbbing clit standing out against her white crotch.

Jen quickly puts her hand between her legs to cover her pussy.

"Crystal, im trying on my new thong!" Jen says as she tries to hide her nudity from the front window.

"Shouldnt you use the changing room for that? Everyone can see your clit."

"Thats why I had my back to the window so people would only see my ass. I dont want them to see my naked pussy anymore than you do." Jen told her. "Kathy is in the changing room trying on her green bikini. There was nowhere else to change."

Jen quickly takes the thong and slides it on. She pulls it up her legs and slides the string along her ass and into her crack as it rides up her butt. She tries to pull up the patch in front to cover her slit. The front comes up shorter than she thought and it barely covers her pussy but luckily since she shaved it the material covers her pink clit from view.

She turns around and models it for them all to see. Jen has to keep adjust it to ensure the front stays over her pussy. Besides the small patch in front she is essentially naked.

"Damn girl! That thong doesnt cover much, might as well be naked." Crystal tells her. "I mean I wear thongs but damn that thing is breif. Hey Jen I thought you didnt like thongs since they show off too much of your ass and almost your pussy?"

"Well im not too crazy about anyone seeing my ass and certainly not my pussy but id rather them oogling my ass than my pussy. I wanted something daring to wear places I couldnt go completely naked." Jen told her.

"I certainly couldnt wear that, im too big for it and my pubes would be all hanging out if I did." Jill tells the two of them.

"You could always shave like me."

"Nah, I like my red bikini just fine."

Joe walks over and looks at Jen in her new thong. He likes what he sees and enjoys the fact that Jen is almost naked except for a small patch of fabric over her clit.

"Do you like your new thong?" Joe asks Jen.

"I really do. It does require some attention in the front to make sure my pussy isnt exposed but its really comfortable and I think the color goes well with me. I want to buy it." Jen says as she adjusts it just before her clit pops into view again.

"Well I need to scan the tag on the side so if you want to buy it youll need to remove it for a moment so I can read the barcode." Joe tells her.

"Damn!" Jen says as she had hoped Joe could complete the purchase and let her walk out of the store with the thong without her needing to remove it. Jen shrugs her shoulders and turns around to take it off for Joe. She just hopes that he can scan it quickly or she can just put her blue bikini back on.

Jen removes the thong and hands it to Joe leaving her naked in the store again. She looks for her blue bikini and cant find it. Jen almost panicks as she fears having to stay naked in the store.

Jen remembers she put the bikini in her purse. It would take her too long and too much fumbling around to get it out so she just stands behind the counter and decides to remain naked until Joe finishes the transaction and then hopefully she can put the thong on, at least until she can change back into her blue bikini bottom.

"Aw damn!" Joe spurts out as he tries to scan the thong. Jen looks at Joe across the counter with her hands on her hips not caring that her pussy is in full view of Joe. "Whats wrong?" Jen asks him.

"Im missing a peice of this bikini." Joe says as he fumbles around inside of a box. Finally he pulls out a bright yellow string bikini top that matches the thong and hands it to Jen.

"I dont want the top, just the thong!" Jen says excitedly to Joe.

"Im sorry miss but its part of the package." Joe tells her as he takes the top and scans the code on it too.

Jen sighs and just hopes it doesnt cost too much. Joe hands the bikini top back to her and tells her itll cost $28 for the whole thing. Jen really wants the thong and while she doesnt want another top since she probably wont be wearing one anytime soon she realizes that buying it is the only way for her to get the thong. Finally she agrees.

Before Joe rings up the final purchase though he suggests Jen try on the bikini top. Jen looks down in dismay, she doesnt want to put a top on but figures the sooner she tries it on the sooner she can get it off her boobs and leave them bare again.

Jen hangs the bikini top over her chest as she wraps the strings around her and ties them behind her. She pulls the cups over her pale breasts and soft pink nipples. Then she adjusts it so everything is in place. Once again the top is just a bunch of strings with two small cups over her breasts and unlike her blue bikini top this one doesnt even cover her areolas completely, it only goes over her nipples and even then just barely. She thinks to herself "what a joke! This bikini doesnt even cover everything and yet I have to buy it with this thong in order to get it. I couldnt even wear this anywhere besides here because it doesnt even cover whats legally required in most places. Im just lucky I live where its legal to go topless everywhere." Jen continues to ponder the bikini as she stands there naked with her pussy exposed and the only thing shes wearing is this ridiculous bikini top that only covers her nipples!

Jen decides to accept the bikini top just so she can get the thong and hopefully she can find someplace to rid herself of the bikini top. Jen takes it off and puts it on the counter for Joe so he can finish her purchase. She reaches into her purse and pulls out two $20 bills and gives them to Joe. He punches up the purchase and gives her the change and her receipt. Joe cuts off the tags and hands Jen the bikini top and thong. She quickly puts the thong on and pulls it over her pussy so noone sees it. Then she stuffs the top in her bag. Joe looks at her odd.

"Areint you going to wear the top?"

"Ill wear it later when we leave the beach." Jen tells him. In reality she has no intention of wearing the top but isnt about to tell Joe that. "I like my breasts and nipples being bare now. Thanks for the top and thong though."

"Youre welcome sweetie, come back anytime." Joe tells Jen as she turns her back to him and smiles as Kathy comes out in her green bikini. She has both the top and bottoms on. Jen and her friends give Kathy the thumbs up and she goes back in to change and comes back out topless wearing her pink bikini bottoms again. Kathy goes over to Joe to pay for her bikini. Jen gives her some money so she can buy the top. She mumbles to herself "at least that bikini had a full top that actually covers something."

Kathy asks Jen "How do you like your thong?"

"Its great Kathy, ive always wanted one like this I also got a top with it. They came together so I had to buy both."

Jen didnt tell Kathy about how little the ugly top Joe tried to swindle her into buying with it actually covered though.

"Oh well, its not like youre gonna wear it anyways, you seem quite happy going topless." Kathy told her.

"I might wear it later." Jen lied to Kathy in front of Joe, mostly for his benefit since he was in earshot. She would tell Kathy the truth later.

Crystal and Jill rolled their eyes knowing damn well Jen was never gonna put that ugly top on ever again. They all thank Joe and walk out topless. Jen quickly pulls them down the street and hurries to the nearest trash can and takes the yellow top and dumps it inside. She smiles as she thrusts her breasts out proudly and is so glad to be topless again.

"I am never wearing a bikini top again..." Jen says happily.

"damn right youre not." Crystal says to her.

"Well I dont know about Jill and me. We love going topless with you gals but I dont know if we're ready to give up wearing tops at the beach completely or not." Kathy says as she holds her breasts nervously.

"Thats okay, im not a big topless person either. Jen is the real topless trooper here." Crystal says as she cups one of Jen's boobs and squeezes it gently.

"Im proud of my breasts and want to be able to show them off everywhere the guys can." Jen says confidently as she puts her arm around Crystal.

"So I take it you didnt like the top Jen? Kathy asks.

"No, I didnt. I only said I did in the store so I wouldnt upset Joe."

"I understand, that top was ridiculous anyways. What a ripoff!" Kathy told her.

"Hey gals want to head down to the music store?' Jill asks.
"Sure, but first I want to find someplace to change out of this thong." Jen says as she scampers over to an alley between the stores and quickly slides her thong off leaving her naked again out in broad daylight as she looks for her blue bikini and when she finds it she slips it back on quickly.

Crystal and her new friends stand guard as Jen changes behind an old dumpster. When Jen walks out Crystal tells her. "its a shame you didnt want to keep that thong on, then we couldve matched."

"Nah, I like the thong but its too big of a step for me today and besides I dont want to have to be constantly adjusting the thing inside the store while im looking around." Jen tells them as she pulls up her blue bikini seeing that she didnt fully adjust it when she put it on and her clit almost came into view.

"I dont know why you bothered hiding to change. You were practically naked as it was you couldve just whipped that thing off and put your bikini on and nobody wouldve known the difference. With that white patch down there anyone from far away wouldve just thought you had a bikini on."

"Im still nervous about people seeing me totally naked in public."

"I dont see why, youre already topless and you dont have much down there for anyone to see."

"Still being naked is alot different than just being topless." Jen tells her as she scratches her nipple because it was itching.

"Not really, I do it all the time."

"What do you mean?" Jen asks her friend.

"Sometimes when im at the beach and they dont have a changing room I just change out of my wet thong in the parking lot and quickly put on a new one. I brought a few just in case this one gets really yucky. I dont like riding in my car wearing a wet swimsuit. Sometimes I change the top too but i usually wait until im in the car for that. Im not as much a trailblazer there as you are. I prefer being bottomless more but theres no way im doing that out here like you do with your breasts."

"Why not? I thought you said being naked was the same as being topless."

"Being topless on the beach is legal. Being fully naked isnt as far as I know except if youre changing quickly and then the cops usually dont care." Crystal tells her.

"Oh okay, I understand." Jen tells her.

"Youll see later when we go home."

Jen wonders what she means by that but doesnt have time to ponder it now. "Hey ladies, are you done in there yet? We wanna go to the music store." Jill yells at them as Crystal and Jen come down the alley with Jen's thong stuffed in her purse.

"Yeah we're ready." Jen tells them as she lifts her hand to cover her eyes from the sun. The four of them walk topless and barefoot down the street to where the music store is. Its one of these huge stores that has a little bit of everything in it. Not as many people go in wearing swimsuits. Some guys are shirtless and a few ladies have bikinis on but alot of the people are clothed and are wearing shoes or at least flip flops. This makes Crystal nervous and she grabs her bikini top out of her purse and puts it on. Jen looks at her in shock.

"Crystal, what are you doing?" Jen asks as she watches her friend pull the cups of her top over her tanned breasts.

"I told you im not a big topless person. I went topless with you in the snack shop because everyone else was and in the bikini shop it just seemed normal but.....this is just uncomfortable for me." Crystal says as she adjusts her bikini top to cover her nipples.

"Me and the other girls are topless and I dont even have a top to put on!" Jen says as she points to the still very topless Kathy and Jill.

"its okay Jen, if Crystal would feel better we can always grab our tops from our purses and put them on." Kathy says as her and Jill look for their tops.

Crystal puts up a hand before they can put them on. "No its alright, I dont mind you three being topless I just dont feel up for it in here."

"Just as well since I dont have a top anyways..." Jen says as she looks at Kathy and Jill who seem to still be thinking about what to do and finally just decide to go topless anyways.

The three of them with the now fully covered Crystal walk towards the entrance to the music store. When they reach the entrance they go to open the door but a guard outside stops them.

"You cant come in here without a top on, ladies!" The guard says sternly.

Damn! Kathy and Jill think as they fumble around for their tops in their bags and quickly put them on.

Jen looks at him hysterically..."What the hell am I supposed to do? I dont even have a top!" Jen covers her breasts with her hands in disgust and goes and stands up against the wall. "i guess ill have to wait for you gals out here...have fun." Jen says as she stands there with her arms over her chest to satisfy the guard.

The girls look at her sadly, wishing they could convince the guard to let her in. They turn to go in. Just after they do Jen still stands there pouting with her arms over her breasts when the guard starts laughing...

"ha ha ha! ooooh you fell for it! They always fall for the ol you cant come in here without a top gag!" The guard laughs uncontrollably and looks at Jen as her jaw hangs open.

The guard walks over to Jen and says "Its okay miss, you can come in like that. I was just messing with you."

Jen lowers her arms and says to him "Thank you! I was almost afraid I wouldnt be able to go in with my friends. Im new to this whole topless thing and I wanted to see where I could go without a top so and I thought I might have to come back some other time with a top on."

"Nah! We dont get them that often but every now and then some topless chick comes in to buy some cds or whatnot and nobody bats an eye." The guard tells her.

"Sometimes we play that joke on them when theyre an easy mark. We dont do it to everyone because we dont want to piss the wrong person off."

"Go in and have fun. Its an unofficial rule but usually when a topless chick comes in we give her a discount because she had the guts to come in here with her breasts uncovered."

"Thanks! Im your girl then, I love being topless and dont plan on wearing one when I come here." Jen tells the guard excitedly as she rushes to the door to enter with her friends.

Jen feels the cool blast of the air conditioner as she enters the store. By now she has gotten used to that but her nipples still stand at attention every time. She finds her friends by the rack with the new cds on it. They look over at her astonished to see their bare breasted friend inside.

"Jen! Its so good to see you in here. I guess you talked that guard into letting you come in here with your tits uncovered." Crystal said to her as she gave her a big hug so glad to see her that she didnt care that she was topless.

"Nah, it was just some joke the guard plays on some topless girls who come in. Actually they give discounts to women who come in here without their tops on." Jen told her friends.

"Really?" Kathy asked as she overheard their conversation.

"Yes its true." Jen said as she shook her tits. "Means another reason im gonna keep coming her bare breasted so I can get stuff cheap." "You three should take your tops off so you can get a discount."

"Sorry, me and Jill are done being topless for today. After that scare at the door it was just too much. Maybe next time sweets. You can stay topless though, doesnt seem like you mind. Im glad that guard didnt scare you."

"Wouldnt matter if he did, I hadnt any top to put on anyways. Even if I had one I wasnt about to put it on just to satisfy him. I dont want to put a top on here. Im getting used to being topless. Im almost forgetting I dont have one on." Jen said as she looked down at her breasts that were getting slightly pinker from her tan but were still quite white compared to the rest of her that was a dark brown.

"Cmon you topless woman you, lets go find some cds!" Kathy took Jen's hand and they walked through the store. Three girls in bikinis and one in a small blue bikini bottom. Crystal walked behind Jen and thought she would make things more exciting since Jen thought Crystal should go bottomless in public more.

When Jen was looking at some music on a rack, Crystal quickly grabbed at Jen's bikini and pulled it down, exposing her cute white ass. Jen was still looking at the cds like nothing had happened. Crystal was surprised Jen didnt feel the breeze or sudden movement of her depantsing her in the store but was curious to see how long it would last before she noticed and pulled her bottoms up. Jen actually turned and stepped out of her bikini and walked away from it, exposing her pussy to the whole store. Luckily for her most of the people were walking by quickly or looking the other way. Jen walked to another rack as Crystal picked up Jen's bikini and stuck it in her purse. Jen continued to look at some country cds with Kathy and Jill in another aisle looking at some rock cds.

Crystal walked up to Jen and asked her how she was doing. Jen told her that she found some cds by some of her favorite artists and was going to buy a few. She thought she felt something funny as someone walked by her and Jen looked down as she was going through her cds when she noticed something weird. She moved the cds and found herself looking right at her pussy! Jen shrieked and immediately put her hand between her legs to cover her bare pussy!

"OMG! Im naked! Where is my bikini? How long have I been bottomless?" Jen asked Crystal desperately, almost with tears in her eyes. Jen now had one arm across her breasts and another with hand over her pussy.

"Damn! I need to find my bikini! I have to get dressed!" Jen panicked as she tried to look around on the floor without uncovering her bits.

Now Jen wishes she had her top or at least something to put on, not that it would help with her bottom, her pussy would still be bard and she would still be naked. Jen really didnt give a damn about her top at that point and uncovered her breasts so she could put both hands on her pussy as she continued to look for her bikini.

Crystal felt really bad now as a harmless prank turned into something more serious. She wanted to end this before it got crazy and they all got kicked out. People were starting to come over and see what was going on and some store employees started to notice too.

She wanted to do something before anyone saw her friend naked. Topless was one thing, there were still some shirtless guys here and several girls in bikinis so Jen's bare breasts werent a problem but naked is another thing. If anyone saw her pussy, theyd all be in trouble.

Crystal handed Jen her bikini saying she found it on the floor. Jen quickly lifted her leg to slide it up so she could get it to cover her pussy before anyone saw that she was naked. Just before she could cover her pussy though a store employee came by and saw her bottomless state.

"Hey, you cant be naked in here!" The employee said to Jen.

"Im so sorry! I dropped my purse and when I went to get it my bikini fell so after I picked up the purse I was trying to pull my bottoms up when you arrived." Jen tried to explain to the angry man.

He looked at her questioningly. The guy wasnt sure if he bought her story or not but didnt want to cause a scene in the store as more people were coming by to see what the ruckus was. So he just said "okay ma'am, just be careful next time. Its okay if you come in here topless but we dont want any nudity in here otherwise we'll have to ask you to leave."

"Thank you! Im sorry I wont cause anymore trouble." Jen said as she tried to collect herself think about what just happened. She wanted to talk to Crystal and find out how it happened.

"How did my bikini fall without me noticing it? I didnt even know I was naked for so long. "

Crystal felt a rock in her gut. She knew what she did but wasnt sure if she wanted to mention it in here or not in fear of what her friend would say. Jen kept looking at her with no intention of changing the subject until she got an answer. Crystal finally decided to spill the beans and tell her.

"I remember how dissapointed you were at almost not being able to come in here topless so I thought id see how far I could push things since you thought I should go bottomless more so I kind of pulled down your bikini to see how long itd take for you to notice you werent wearing it. Honestly I thought that youd notice it right away and just pull it up and see it was a harmless prank. I was actually quite surprised when you just stepped out of them and walked away."

"I almost got thrown out of here for real! You know how I dont like having my privates exposed in public! I understand what you were trying to do though. You just wanted to heat things up a bit. Dont worry youre my friend, I forgive you. Sometimes I do wish I could go bottomless and just walk completely naked through here but im content now just being topless and being able to have my breasts uncovered."

"I think we should just find Kathy and Jill so we can buy our cds and go before we overstay our welcome." Jen told Crystal as they walked around a few aisles until they found their other two bikini clad friends.

"Hey girls. Where were you? Some big ruckus happened a few minutes ago. There was this big crowd and someone mentioned something about a naked girl." Kathy explained.

"Oh dont worry, that was me. Crystal tried to pull a prank on me by depantsing me in the store. I managed to get them back on but not before giving a few people a show. Anyways I just want to get these cds before anything else happens."

"Alright hon. Im just glad youre okay, you too Crystal." "Im real glad we met up with you two, especially you Jen. Ive never met someone who is so confident and enthusiastic about going topless as you are. Youre a real inspiration to us." Kathy told them both.

Since Jen was the only one of their group still topless and that was the only way to get the discount she took all their cds to the front of the store with some money that Kathy and Jill gave her for their stuff and she walked up to the counter with all of it. The cashier was very happy to see her.

"May I help you miss?" the cashier asked Jen.

"Yes id like to buy these cds. I heard that topless women get a discount. Am I topless enough?" Jen asks as she shakes her bare breasts in front of the cashier.

"Oh most certainly miss and yes we do give discounts to topless women. I heard about a topless woman being in here and in fact even heard a rumor that someone was naked in the back of the store for a short time. Is that true?" The cashier asked Jen.

Jen gulped not sure weither to tell him or not. He didnt seem upset about it though and figured he probably knew more than he was letting on so she thought she better come clean with him. "Yes I was naked for a brief time. My friend pulled my bikini down as a prank and I walked around shopping without realizing I was naked and showing my pussy off. I do apologize for any inconvience I caused your store."

"Not at all miss, on the contrary. We have never had a naked woman in here before. We havent even had a topless woman for a while. Some young perky girl came in topless with her friends a while back but nothing like you. I'm going to give you a 50% discount on everything youve purchased here today."

Jen's eyes went wide. "Really?"

"Yes of course miss. We encourage our customers to come as they are and be comfortable so they can enjoy themselves and want to purchase things in our store. So few people come into our store anymore and we have troubles turning a profit so we have to do something to get people incentive to come here. So we give discounts discreetly to people who come in wearing little or nothing, usually topless women or in your case fully naked!"

"Ive never been to a store that does this." Jen said astonished.

"Its not something we publicly announce but we need to do something to get by."

"Thank you, ill be sure to let my friends know." Jen said as she pays for her cds, which were a grand total of $19.95, not bad for almost 10 practically newly released cds.

"Just curious, if you have that rule why did that other employee get upset because of my nakedness?"

"Oh that was Benny, hes new here, I apologize. He was not aware of our new rules. I didnt think he would say anything but it seems someone mentioned your lack of clothing to him and he decided to take it upon himself to investigate. I promise you we will update him on the rules so this sort of unfortunate thing doesnt happen again. Good day to you."
The cashier put the change in her hand and kissed it.

"Youre welcome." Jen took the change and walked towards the front door where her friends were.

"So howd it go?" Kathy asked Jen as she walked up.

"it went great, we got a 50% discount because I was naked in the store." Jen told her.

"What about that nasty employee?" Crystal asked Jen.

"Dont worry about him, hes a new guy. He was unaware of the unofficial rules here and thought it was against the rules for me to be naked in here. The guy at the desk is gonna have a talk with him to update him on the rules here so there shouldnt be anymore problems."

"Thats wonderful. Do you think youll come here again naked?" Kathy asked

"I dont know, im definitely going to come back again topless. I get a discount either way so I guess it just depends on how I feel. Im still kind of nervous of being naked in public that much with my pussy exposed like that but you never know. " Jen told her.

"I guess its a thrill enough just going topless in a place like this. Letting all these guys see your bare torso with your breasts and nipples exposed. Thats quite a rush!" Kathy says to Jen as they walk outside.

"Yeah, im more of a topless chick." Jen tells her showing off her firm titties.

The guard outside the door waves bye to them and wishes them a good day, hoping theyll come back again.

Crystal asks Kathy and Jill. "Hey ladies wanna join me and the topless wonder here for a quick dip in the sea?"

"Thats tempted but me and Jill have to get back home, we're roomates and we need to do some errands and stuff. Heres our number, call us later and maybe we'll plan something together." Kathy gave Crystal her number and gave both her and Jen a big hug.

"It was great meeting both of you and I hope we see you topless around town Jen" Jill said as Kathy and her walked to their car.

"Have a good one, bye." Kathy yelled before they got in the car and drove away.

Jen waved bye and made sure to wiggle her tits towards them as they drove away. Finally when they were gone Jen dashed across the beach towards the ocean. When she got there she jumped in letting the waves just roll over her. She had to be careful not to let her only peice of clothing wash away but she enjoyed the feel of the cool water on her body. Crystal jumped in too and splashed around with Jen for a bit. Crystal even got a bit naughty and slipt her thong off under the water and walked around a bit bottomless under the waves. She knew noone could see her so she wasnt worried about being naked.

Suddenly a huge wave hit them and Jen got tossed around in the water and Crystal had to desperately try to hold on to her thong which was trying to get washed away. Finally before their luck changed Crystal put her thong back on and Jen adjusted her bikini bottom before they both got out and walked towards their towels to pick up their stuff for the long walk back to their car.


After they spend their day at the beach, Jen and Crystal walked back to the car sitting in the parking lot. Crystal opens the trunk and puts the towels they brought inside and gets Jen's shorts out.

"Here you go Jen, I figured youd want to wear these on the way back. I know how you are with your bottom." Crystal says as she hands the shorts to Jen. Crystal then slips her thong off and looks for another one in the trunk.

"My god Crystal, youre naked!" Jen says as she looks at her friend, bottomless with her pussy and ass bare for all to see.

"I do this all the time. Now you know what I meant earlier." Crystal says still naked and finally fishes her thong out of the trunk and slips it on. Jen notices that it doesnt cover much but at least her pussy is covered even though her ass is still out there since the string just goes up inside her crack.

Jen decides she better get her "bottoms" on so they can leave. She takes the shorts and tries to slide them on but realizes her bottoms are still wet.

"I cant wear these over my bottoms, theyre soaked." Jen says.

"So take them off."

"Well show me where the restrooms are and ill be right back."

"Im sorry hon, there are no restrooms. You have to change into your shorts here." Crystal explains to her.

"I cant do that, ill be naked again."

"Noone will see you, itll be real quick and besides all you gotta do is just face the car and the only thing people will see is your pale ass. They can already see most of that anyways."

Jen stands there and ponders what Crystal has told her. She can either quickly slip the bottoms off and put the shorts on, breifly exposing her smooth clit and white ass for a few seconds or she can just slip the shorts on over her wet bottoms and be uncomfortable the rest of the trip.

"Cmon girl, hurry up and decide or youll just have to put the shorts on over the bottoms or just go naked. Theres no way youre wearing those wet things in my car like that."

"Oh hell" Jen says as she quickly slides the bottoms off her hips and down her slender legs, bringing her pussy into view again. She struggles to get the bottoms off as she wiggles her ass in the air for all to see reminding her that shes naked and everyone is getting a show. Theres not too many people around but still Jen doesnt want them to see anymore of her lower bits anymore than necessary.

Jen puts her hand between her legs to cover her pussy as she takes her shorts and tries to pull them up her legs. She knows she will have to remove her hand to finish pulling the shorts up so she quickly pulls it away and brings the shorts up over her hips finally covering her ass and pussy from view. Jen sighs with releif and puts her wet bottoms in a bag as she goes to grab her bikini top when Crystal slams the trunk door.

"What are you doing? I need my bikini top!" Jen tells her friend.

"No you dont, you wanted to be topless and get rid of your tanlines and thats what im gonna help you do."

"Thats alright for the beach, even the snack shop or other stores on the boardwalk but if we're gonna drive home in your convertible I need to wear a top." Jen says practically begging Crystal to let her in the trunk for her bikini.

"Why? Its legal to go topless here and youve always wanted to do this. Everyone else wears bikinis and nobody bats an eye. So stop worrying and lets go." Crystal puts her foot down and gets in the car.

Jen knowing she is defeated gets in the car as she puts her back to the seat. She loves the feeling of the leather on her bare torso. It feels so much better without those bikini straps getting in the way. Jen smiles as she realizes that its actually better this way.

"You know I actually like this. Ive never been topless in a car outside before." Jen says confidently as she leans back and puts her arms behind her head as she thrusts her chest out and feels the cool wind as it goes past her bare nipples.

Jen looks at her friend as they drive away from the beach and go down the street through the town. Now that she has been topless almost all day Jen starts to feel really relaxed and doesnt even care as they drive by and countless people can see her bare breasts and soft pink nipples.

"Are you hungry for some dinner?" Crystal asks Jen as they continue to drive.

"Sure, can we stop by your place and have something?"

"I dont have anything to eat hon. Would you like to stop by and get something?"

"Some fast food would be nice. Can we go through the drive thru?"

"Nah, I thought we would just sit and eat it there."

"Crystal! Im not dressed for that. Im topless! This isnt the beach, they wont let me in without a shirt."

"Of course they will its still a beach town, lots of girls eat at these places in their bikinis."

"With bare breasts?"

"Maybe not but youll be a trend setter again."

"Well its not any worse than anything else ive done today." Jen says as they pull up to the restaurant which is a small burger joint and they get out of the car. One of them wearing a two peice bikini and one bare from the waist up with just some breif jean shorts on with bare feet. Jen looks around to see if anyone is watching her as she walks towards the entrance.

Jen thinks about how excited she is to go topless into a real restaurant this time. Its someplace thats not near the beach so its not as normal for a girl to come in wearing what shes got on. Jen feels a bit more nervous wearing the shorts and being topless since going topless in the bikini is more normal where its not everyday you see a topless girl just wearing shorts going around town. She figures its better that shes topless than bottomless though. Jen would freak out if anyone in there saw her pussy.

When they get to the door Jen gets a little scared because she sees the small sign on the door that says "No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service." She turns towards Crystal and covers her breasts with her hands.

"See I told you they wouldnt let me in without a top on." Jen exclaims.

Crystal just rolls her eyes and tells Jen "those places put up those signs all the time. Its policy. Nobody here is gonna actually bother you about what youre wearing."

"You mean what im *not* wearing." Jen uncovers her bare white tits to prove her point.

"Well im hungry so you can either come in and eat with me or stay out here with your bare titties and wait till im done and ill grab you something. Youre always talking about enjoying finally being topless in public well now you are so just go with it." Crystal tells her.

Jen looks down and can feel her stomach rumbling as she puts her hand on it. Her desire for food overwhelms her fleeting desire to cover her breasts. Besides Crystal is right Jen does love being topless in public.

Not wanting to bother with her scant top just to grab a bite to eat she hurries and opens the door and walks brazenly inside. Again Jen feels the cold air from inside hit her body as she enters. Her nipples are like rocks once again.

"Wow, your nipples sure do get hard fast." Crystal tells her as she looks at her friend and sees her pink nipples stick out from her smallish breasts like daggers.

"Imagine what itd be like in the frozen food section at the grocery store!"

Jen places her nipples between her fingers and rubs them and sure enough they feel quite hard.

"Maybe ill have to try that sometime." Jen says to Crystal.

Crystal thinks about all the interesting ways that could work out as she walks with Jen further into the restaurant.

As she walks towards the counter the light hits her and the whiteness of her breasts really stand out from the rest of her tanned body. She looks down and really notices this and realizes how out of place she looks but she likes it because shes always wanted to be able to go topless to places she normally wouldnt.

When Jen gets to the counter she waits for the person to come take their order. Soon a guy walks up and does a double take as he sees a topless girl standing in front of him. He cant beleive his eyes and his jaw just drops. He is amazed by how small and firm her breasts look and he loves her tanlines. He quickly regains his composure though.

"Ma'am are you okay? Where's your top?" He asks her genuinely concerned.

"Oh, we just came from the beach, I took my top off to work on my tan. I hope its okay that im topless in here. if its a problem we can go somewhere else." Jen tells the man worriedly as she goes to cover her breasts.

The guy quickly tries to calm her before she leaves and he is denied his chance to serve a goddess. "Oh no its fine ma'am. We get lots of beachgoers here, we dont have any rules about shirts or shoes or things like that despite the sign on the door which we had to put there despite our lack of a dress code.. Many guys come in shirtless and barefoot and alot of girls come in wearing bikinis although I have to say youre the first to come here topless. I just thought since you were topless you were in some sort of trouble. Especially since you dont look like you usually go topless." The guy said as he pointed to her tanlines.

"Youre right I dont usually go topless until now but thats why im working on my tan because I want to go topless more." Jen told him. She uncovered her breasts and let the guy look at them.

"Wow, thats a releif. Most girls wouldnt be caught dead in here topless unless they were in some sort of trouble." He told her.

"You dont need to worry about little ol me im just here to get my....meal" Jen said as she winked at him and shook her breasts at him teasingly.

"Very well ma'am, what would you like?"

"A couple of burgers and some fries with two cokes. You can call me Jen."

"Right away ma'am.....uh Jen." The cashier said hysterically as he was still trying to get used to a topless chick in his place.

"Whats your name?" Jen said as she leaned on the counter smiling at the guy with her breasts hanging bare just mere feet from his face.

"My name is Jake." He said as he rung up her order. "The total comes to $8.75" Jake said to Jen as she was still leaning on the counter, her lovely tan topless body glowed in the soft lights on the ceiling.

"Wow, what a discount." Jen said as she handed Jake the money.

"Well youre special customers, we dont usually get such pleasant people in here." Jake handed her the change and receipt with her cups. Inside one of the cups was a paper. Jen pulled out the paper and read it. The paper had Jake's number on it, 555-9788.

"Thats my number, whats yours?" Jake asked. Jen wrote hers down on another paper he gave her and she handed it back to him.

"Im gonna have to keep that handy for later." Jake said as he slipt the paper in his pocket. Jen took the paper Jake gave her and stuck it in a better place, right in her bikini bottoms! Jake liked that, especially since he thought he saw a breif hint of her pussy as she did it, for all he knew it was intentional.

"You really worked that guy over, hes kinda cute. You should call him later." Crystal said as she teased Jen by playing with her nipple. It was her way of driving Jen nuts.

"Maybe I will."

Jen and Crystal went to fill their drinks as their food was put on the counter for them. They took the trays and walked to a table. Most of the people in the restaurant were beachgoers so alot of them had swimsuits on so Jen wasnt too uncomfortable being topless in a place like this although she secretly wished there were more normal people here so she could push her boundaries a bit but she was already doing that since this was the first place off the beach she had been topless and most girls dont go bare in a restaurant like this. Jen is no ordinary girl though.

Jen and Crystal sit down to eat their meal. Crystal looks at Jen and envies her sitting there topless wishing she had the courage to do that.

"How do you feel being topless here away from the beach Jen?"

"Its a bit unsual but I like it and im getting very comfortable going topless, even places away from the beach now. You should try it. You did well with going topless in the snack bar and the bikini shop. We even got Kathy and Jill to try it."

"They were cool, I hope we run into them again. Maybe we'll get them to go topless again with us. About me though I dont know I mean it was cool going topless in the snack bar and the bikini shop because it was on the beach and there was other people doing it like you and Kathy and Jill but now that its just us and we're away from the beach its just a bit odd for me. Im not like you ready to whip the top off at a moment's notice and just go bare on top for hours on end going everywhere without a car in the world that they can all see your tits." Cathy explained to her.

Cathy smiled as she reached down and slipt her thong off leaving her bottomless in the seat across from Jen.

"What are you doing? Youre bottomless! Your pussy is bare inside of the restaurant."

"So what? Nobody can see it under the table and ill put it back on before we leave. Besides what do you care? Youre here with your tits hanging out, I want my pussy and ass to have same freedom. We all get comfortable in our own ways." Crystal told her as she breifly flashed her pussy at Jen to show her she was really naked under the table.

"So where do you want to go tommorow?"

"I was thinking of going to this cool amusement park they have in the city near the beach. I heard about it the other day."

"Thats awesome, we should wear our bikinis there. Itll be another day of fun in the sun." Crystal tells her.

"Just make sure you remember your thong." Jen says as she points to Crystal's naked bush under the table.

"You gonna wear your bikini top there this time?" Crystal asks her.

"I dont know, those places are usually lax about those sorts of things so I might do that or just go topless. Ill have to see when we get there. At most ill wear the bikini top and I can always take it off later." Jen says.

"I guess thats better than nothing." Crystal tells her as she strokes her pussy under the table. She notices how wet she is and realizes that being essentially naked in the restaurant has gotten her more excited than she thought.

The two girls finish their meal and Crystal slides her thong back on When they get up Crystal leaves a small puddle on the seat from her juices when she was so excited whilte naked. Crystal figures itll be a nice souvenir for whoever comes to clean the tables. The two throw their trash away and go back out to the car. When they get in the car, Crystal immediately slides her thong off and puts it on the seat as they drive away. Jen looks over and sees Crystal's bush. Besides her bikini top, Crystal is naked from the waist down.

"Wow, youre naked Crystal! You must be really getting into the whole bottomless thing." Jen says as she looks at her friend.

"I try to go without the thong whenever I can, obviously I cant go the same places bottomless that you do without a top though." Crystal tells her as she looks at Jen's bare breasts.

"Since your pussy is already bare, why do you even bother with the top? It looks silly without the thong on." Jen cups her breasts in my her hands.

"Besides the fact that I like the support my top offers, it allows people driving by to think im fully clothed when really im naked on the bottom. If I was topless everyone would know I had nothing on down there." Crystal spreads her legs as she continues to drive.

"Thats interesting, everyone seems to love it that im topless. I think its more sexy to be topless than fully naked because it gives people a sense of wondering whats under the bikini down there instead of just having it all hang out and leave nothing to the imagination." Jen says as she holds her breasts together and rubs her bare nipples.

"You are just too much, girl." Crystal tells her as they get close to Jen's appartment. They pull into Jen's appartment and Jen hops out to go back and get her stuff out of the trunk. Crystal gets out with her not bothering to put her thong back on. Jen sees her.

"Hey Crystal your bush is showing, areint you worried about someone seeing you?"

"Not really, everyone here knows you go topless alot and theyve seen me in my tiny thong before so its not like theres anything they havent seen before."

"I do think I should take the top off though. Its one thing to have it on in the car but yeah I think out here it does look a little ridiculous without the thong on." Crystal unclasps her top and throws it in the car. Now she is fully naked.

Luckily we are here in the back so noone will see us from the street. Lets get your stuff out of the trunk. They open the trunk and get Jen's towel and her beach stuff out and Crystal hands her the bikini top.

"Guess you really didnt need that today huh?" Crystal tells her as she hands the small string top to Jen. Jen looks at it and holds it up to her now almost tanned breasts.

"I guess I didnt, maybe next time ill just leave it here and go topless the whole time. Seems like everything worked out better that way." Jen took the bikini top and shoved it in her purse.

The two ladies walked in to her building and up the stairs, one of them topless in just a tiny pair of bottoms and one completely naked. When they get to her door, Jen unlocks it and walks inside. Crystal follows her in.

"Do you want anything to eat or drink?" Jen asks her as she walks into the kitchen. She slides her bikini bottoms off and puts them on the chair. "I dont need these anymore." Jen says as she continues to walk naked to the fridge.

Crystal walks in and says "I guess ill have a soda." She sees Jen standing naked there and is excited. "Finally got out of those bottoms and naked like me huh?"

"Since we're here and its just us girls I didnt see any sense in wearing them. I like being naked at home although I think its more fun being topless outside."

"You look great naked Jen but yeah I can see the appeal of going topless outside." Crystal tells her as she continues to look Jen's naked body over.

"I love it that you completely shaved your bush off down there."

"Yeah it feels great not to have any hair down there. It feels like im really naked and from far away you cant even tell I dont have something on down there, especially with the tan."

Crystal notices how white Jen's ass and pussy are compared to the rest of her body, including her breasts which are now becoming more tan although theyre still whiter than the rest of her.

"So what are you gonna do the rest of the day?" Jen asks her friend.

"Oh probably just do some errands and then go home. What are you gonna do?"

"Just take a shower and watch some tv for a while and then go to bed." Jen tells her.

"Make sure you put the thong on if you go anywhere though."

"Oh dont worry, I will." Crystal says to Jen.

"Im sure we're gonna have some fun tommorow."

"Yeah another day of us wearing our bikinis and doing crazy stuff together. Although im sure youre gonna just be topless and barefoot again. With as little as you wear you might as well go naked."

"I dont think I could do that there, im gonna be lucky just to be able to go topless. Being fully naked on those rides would be kind of pushing it."

"Ill be lucky if I can get in wearing my thong." Crystal tells her.

"If you cant just wear regular bikini bottoms or shorts like me." Jen tells her.

"I think its sexy going topless wearing the shorts sometimes instead of the bikini bottoms because then you realize more that youre topless and theres a certain mysteriousness to the whole thing."

"I do think im going to go nude under the shorts though. Itll be fun knowing that those shorts are the only things between me and being naked."

"Then you could always just take the shorts off in the car and go naked, although unlike me you wouldnt have a top on so everyone would know you were naked."

"I think ill just keep the shorts on. As much as id like to go naked in the car I dont want anyone to see my pussy."

"Well see ya tommorow girl. I hope you sleep well." Crystal takes her soda and kisses Jen on the cheek before she walks out naked back to her car and drives away not even bothering to put her top or thong back on again.

Jen hops in the shower and quickly rinses off thinking about her day and realizing how hard her nipples are and how moist her pussy is because her clit is just throbbing from the excitement of her day. Never has she been topless that long and in so many places in one day. Jen vows never to put a top on again for the rest of her time off unless absoulutely necessary.

When Jen gets out she doesnt bother to put any clothes on she just dries off and plops herself down on the couch to watch some tv. After a few hours of watching tv she gets up and goes into the bedroom to get some sleep for her big day tommorow.

To Be Continued

 

[Mr_Frobenius]

Mike:

Interesting story.

I like the girls having real emotions and not just doing whatever is hot.

I Canada it is legal for girls to go topless but sadly few do, and those who try it get hassled by the police. They don't get charged with a crime because then they could fight the charge in court and win.

We live in a funny world were the news can show us dismembered bodies and unspeakable violence, but if someone exposes a breast then all hell breaks loose.

Just my two cents. I think I would like to live in the community you describe. ;-)

Mr_Frobenius

 

[RedJohnny]

This is a lengthy piece, so congratulations on putting something this long together. It takes a lot of work.

Plot aside, this needs a lot of editorial work. At the most basic, there are numerous issues with grammar and capitalization (there are more than half a dozen mistakes in the first paragraph alone). A simple spell checker will catch most of them, and proofreading will catch things like using "because since." If you have MS Word or another word processor with a grammar checking function, that will catch many of the grammar issues.

Once you get past those mechanics, you're consistently shifting between tenses - moving from past tense (she went, she said, she did) to the present tense (she smiles, she goes, etc.), and it's a little jarring. This is something you could do if you wanted to shift into the first person (as opposed to the third person omniscient narrative that you're using) and tell the story as the person is experiencing it. However, if there isn't a narrative or stylistic reason for the shift, then you should try to be consistent.

Moving past that, the sentence and story-telling structure is simplistic in a way that doesn't really pull the reader along. The characters move the plot forward a little, and then you step in as the narrator and provide an explanation or some additional information, and the narration almost becomes another character in the story. In some works, that's an important element to the story because of the narrator's relationship to the characters and the events, but in this case it makes me feel like I'm watching an old Dukes of Hazard episode where the action freezes and the narrator steps in to provide some exposition.

For example:

==================

"Great, im going to wear my white bikini with the thong bottoms" Crystal told Jen mischeviously.

Jen had often thought of wearing a thong on a public beach but feared people seeing her ass and pussy even though she enjoyed being naked in private so she opted for a full string bikini instead.​

===================

You could have said something like, "Jen blushed excitedly at the idea. 'God, I wish I had the guts to do that! I just couldn't show off my ass the way you do. A string bikini is as far as I can go in public.'" rather than giving voice to the narrator. Giving a little insight into her reaction and having her say it gives the reader much of the same information.

A business writing class I once took had us use an application to rate the academic level of every piece of writing we did. If it came out at higher than a 5th grade level we had to rewrite it, because that is the level where people are confident that most business people will understand what you have written. Writing fiction, on the other hand, is very different. With fiction you use more complex sentence structure and vocabulary to pull the reader into the world you've created and give us insight into the characters. With every sentence you write, you should ask "So what?" - i.e., is the sentence necessary? Does it do what is required at this point in the narrative?

Working from the first paragraph, again:

==========================

Jen woke up in the morning at 7am. So what? Is it important that she woke up at 7?She rubbed her eyes as she sat up and looked down at her naked body. Her pale white breasts and shaved pussy stood out in stark contrast to her slender tanned body. During the summer Jen almost always wore bikinis so besides her breasts and pussy the rest of her was entirely in the sun.This sentence isn't really necessary. It didnt take Jen long to get out of bed as she didnt have any covers on over her since it gets so hot in the summer. So what? Why is this information necessary?Jen felt so good being naked and unrestricted from clothing at home, especially when she slept. Her bladder felt full from her long sleep so she scurried into the bathroom to releive herself.Why is this relevant? When she got out of the bathroom she heard her phone ring and went to pick it up. Crystal, Jen's best friend was on the other end.​

===========================

Consider something different (note, there are many, many writers on LitE who are far better than I am. I'm not offering this as THE way to do it, just as an example of a different way to do it that focuses more on the characters.)

===========================

The early morning sunlight streamed in through the window onto Jen's naked body. As she woke she stretched languorously on top of the covers made unnecessary by the summer heat.

Across the room, her cell phone chirped into life singing,

Can we talk about tomorrow and the promise that it brings
I want to be your Crystal Baller, I want to show you everything

to announce her best friend, Crystal.

Easing off the bed, she caught her reflection in the bathroom mirror. She posed for a second, admiring the deep bronze skin and the contrast with the tiny alabaster triangles around her nipples and her freshly shaved pussy. A flash of motion in the window behind her made her realize how exposed she was to street traffic, even though she was on the second floor. "They'd just think I was in a white bikini. If they only knew." The thought sent a shiver of warm excitement through her, but Third Eye Blind quickly brought her back.

Can we talk about tomorrow and the promise that it brings
I want to be your Crystal Baller, I want to show you everything

"Hey, Crys."

"Hey girl, what have you got planned today?"
​

===================

The idea is that the narrative and her own thoughts explain things and set up the story, rather than just stating things like "It didnt take Jen long to get out of bed as she didnt have any covers on over her since it gets so hot in the summer." (Which brings up the word "since." It appears 40 times, almost always as a synonym for "because" (e.g., "Since she is always active and likes to run alot Jen has a slim figure. ") rather than the temporal reference (e.g., "It's been five days since I got paid.") You might consider listing out all of the sentences that include the word "since" so that you really get an idea of how they play through the piece.) Even the ringtone serves a purpose.

[Added 9/15] The length of your story is a big reason why all of this editing work would be desirable. If someone is reading LitE for a short stroke piece, they're probably willing to forgive more literary sins; however, if someone is going to invest the time in reading a piece this long, they are probably going to give up after the first few paragraphs if the writing isn't reasonably grammatically correct (no one's asking for perfection) and interesting. [End 9/15 addition]

This is a fun story. Good luck with it!

 

[Mrtouf]

If you post a long piece here on the forum it can help to use indenting, so that all the lines are a bit shorter.

[INDENT][INDENT]All your story text goes here.[/INDENT][/INDENT]

Sorry I can't be any more help at the moment.

 

[ShirtlessMike05]

Interesting story.

I like the girls having real emotions and not just doing whatever is hot.

I Canada it is legal for girls to go topless but sadly few do, and those who try it get hassled by the police. They don't get charged with a crime because then they could fight the charge in court and win.

We live in a funny world were the news can show us dismembered bodies and unspeakable violence, but if someone exposes a breast then all hell breaks loose.

Just my two cents. I think I would like to live in the community you describe. ;-)

Mr_Frobenius

Thanks, yeah the girls are real free spirited and outgoing. They like doing what is fun and not just doing something because its hot.

I was really going for the kind of place where its legal to go topless but few do so it would still be interesting and youd get some looks and shocked comments but like aside from the police taking a second glance or asking the girl if shes alright theyre not gonna arrest her or anything because the case wouldnt hold any water in court.

Nobody really bats an eye about someone going topless in the town in this story but yeah theyre still real people and even though they get their kicks out of seeing violence and stuff on tv they really dont like it in public and will do something about it if like someone is getting hurt or theres like a real law being broken.

I really was trying to go for the kind of community alot of people would like to live in.

Michael

 

[KillerMuffin]

You might wanna change "she's about 18 years old" to "she's 18 years old" before the mods come sniffing along and you're suddenly wondering where your thread went.

 

[ShirtlessMike05]

This is a lengthy piece, so congratulations on putting something this long together. It takes a lot of work.

Thanks about the length. I didnt want it too long that it would take forever to read because it is only the first chapter of a bigger story but I did want it long enough that you could enjoy it and it wouldnt be over in like just a few minutes. Ive read too many interesting stories that are over real quick and just rush through everything and I would really like to read more about whats going on.

Plot aside, this needs a lot of editorial work. .

It is actually a work in progress version so theres gonna be alot of spelling and grammar issues. To tell the truth at first I was mostly focusing on the story and then I was gonna go back later and really freshen it up and do the spell checks and all of that. I just wanted to put it on here and see what everyone thought of it before I really got going into it in case they just thought it was a total flop or something.

Once you get past those mechanics, you're consistently shifting between tenses - moving from past tense (she went, she said, she did) to the present tense (she smiles, she goes, etc.), and it's a little jarring.

I do want to try a first persona narrative to the story. I just didnt want to confuse anyone and make them think I was the person in the story because im a guy and this character is totally fictional.

Moving past that, the sentence and story-telling structure is simplistic in a way that doesn't really pull the reader along. The characters move the plot forward a little, and then you step in as the narrator and provide an explanation or some additional information, and the narration almost becomes another character in the story.

Im not sure who will be reading it so I kind of want it simple but yeah I do intend to add some more details to make it more interesting and pull the reader along.

You could have said something like, "Jen blushed excitedly at the idea. 'God, I wish I had the guts to do that! I just couldn't show off my ass the way you do. A string bikini is as far as I can go in public.'" rather than giving voice to the narrator. Giving a little insight into her reaction and having her say it gives the reader much of the same information.

Alot of that is just for my benefit while im editing the story. Im gonna do that though since im gonna go more for a first person narrative.

Michael

 

[ShirtlessMike05]

You might wanna change "she's about 18 years old" to "she's 18 years old" before the mods come sniffing along and you're suddenly wondering where your thread went.

Of course, for the record Jen is 18 years old. She has been for the past few months as of the beginning of the story. I made sure I didnt write anything about anyone that isnt over 18.

 

[ShirtlessMike05]

Jen actually is supposed to look younger than she is because I wanted her character to have the innocence and youthfulness of a teenager but still be at the legal age for a character in a story on this site. I plan on using that younger appearance she has in some ways in the story because some people wont know she is as old as she actually is.

Her friend Crystal is supposed to be a little bit older than her like 19 or 20 and shes a bit more experienced with things than Jen and thats why she tries to encourage Jen to push her limits and try new things.