Too many adjectives and adverbs in my writing…ugh! You?

[FifthEstate]

Stephen King would hate my stories! I didn’t used to be cognizant of it, but I am now and I still can’t correct it. They sound good when I’m writing and not even that bad when I’m editing, but I hate them after the story publishes. I know I can go back and edit later, but I never seem to do it. Anyone else have this problem and what do you do about it?

 

[NotWise]

I try to depend on verbs and keep my prose plain, and it usually is.

I have a problem I must confess. Even though I don't use a lot of adjectives, I fall into a situational pattern of using a single adjective immediately before a noun. I think it's a timing and rhythm thing for me that I have to catch and control.

 

[MillieDynamite]

Sometimes, I rework them with the single goal of reducing the adverbs. I'm not as bad with adjectives as adverbs. They said that the use of adverbs is lazy writing. I believe it is more from the rapidity with which I write. Wait a moment, is rapidity an adverb? No, it's a noun. Good!

 

[Bubo_bubo]

I tend to write quite wordily, and then I go over it with my editing wordbrush-cutting shears. It's often easier to pair down overly wordy prose than to sex up dry Hemingway-like prose.

 

[oggbashan]

My problem? Too many unusual (and British ) words. According to Grammarly, I use more unique words than 99% of Grammarly users...

 

[SimonDoom]

I like NotWise's idea, and it's one I've tried to follow. Focus on the verbs. If you choose your verbs more carefully, you cut back on the need for words to modify them.

That said, while I think it's a good idea to edit adjectives and adverbs, I don't think one has to be obsessive about it. They have their place.

 

[burgwad]

If getting rid of adverbs/adjectives feels good, then that's the right call for you. But there are defensible writers who make the other call. David Foster Wallace, Vladimir Nabokov, and Rachel Cusk--granted, maximalists all--are a few writers off the top of my head whose work makes a strong case for extending equal affection to all parts of speech.

• Wallace combines his prodigious obsession with words with a bona fide case of synesthesia, and gets results you will not find anywhere else.
• Nabokov is Nabokov: better at his third language than any of us will ever be at our first.
• And Cusk is the greatest living writer you may not have heard of. Her work is lucid and painterly and conversational.

While adverbs and adjectives serve as crutches for lazy writing, they can turn more carefully tuned prose positively bionic.

EDIT: Let me also add that these are writers who have no qualms writing with a pronounced style. Anon would 1-bomb them to hell and back.

 

[MillieDynamite]

I hate the overuse of the verb was. Was he happy? Was she sad? How was it that not a moment of happiness lifted his spirits in the last ten years, that was the question? ENOUGH with was already! And yet you cannot eliminate that fucking word entirely.

 

[TheWorldBuilder]

My problem? Too many unusual (and British ) words. According to Grammarly, I use more unique words than 99% of Grammarly users...

How on Earth can a larger vocabulary and using the correct form of English ever be considered a problem?

 

[MillieDynamite]

Uncommon words can cause issues. I'm not sure how Grammarly interprets unique words. The proper way to interpret them is they occur only once in the story, making their use Unique.

 

[stickygirl]

One's choice of adjectives or adverbs needed to paint your canvas is entirely up to you. Your choice of words defines your style as a writer and being overly constrained ie looking over your shoulder at how other people compose, can stifle the process. If you find you write in a conversational way then later tighten up on adverbs in editing, then that's your style too. No one has to stick to a formula - just make sure the spelling is correct

 

[ElectricBlue]

- just make sure the spelling is correct

also, commas .

 

[oggbashan]

How on Earth can a larger vocabulary and using the correct form of English ever be considered a problem?

Comments complain that they have to use a dictionary or search on the internet which interrupts their reading...

 

[AwkwardlySet]

I write in English directly, yet I am not a native English speaker... Imagine the chaos that follows when I unconsciously put the dynamics of my own language into English. I pity all those 'proper English' people when they start reading my stories

 

[EarlyMorningLight]

Comments complain that they have to use a dictionary or search on the internet which interrupts their reading...

*wanking

 

[BobbyBrandt]

also, commas .

My grandson was extremely lazy with using proper punctuation in his junior high school English classes. I played the Jim Stafford song "My Girl Bill" for him one day and his laziness with using punctuation immediately disappeared.

 

[oggbashan]

*wanking

Unlikely with many of my recent stories.

 

[FifthEstate]

also, commas .

Grammar and punctuation aren’t an issue for me…and yes, I fully agree.

 

[JGittes]

Adverbs are my downfall. I've developed a checklist of 53 words, not entirely adverbs, and use the find function in Word to list all their occurrences. I immediately eliminated 95% of them, changed the sentence to eliminate another 3%, and the remaining 2% had the impact I initially thought every occurrence had.

It's damned tedious, though.

 

[oggbashan]

also, commas .

Grammarly insists on far more commas than I would normally use.

 

[SimonDoom]

Grammarly insists on far more commas than I would normally use.

I agree. It's very strict. It tends to insist that independent clauses should always be separated by a comma. I think in fiction it's OK for it to be optional sometimes. Getting rid of commas sometimes gives the writing a pleasing sense of rushing along, while putting the comma in slows things down.

For instance:

I grabbed her dress and I pulled it off her.

Grammarly would insist that you write

I grabbed her dress, and I pulled it off her.

Because it's two independent clauses joined by the conjunction "and."

I go both ways on this but sometimes I prefer the former.

 

[DarkRaven13]

Damnit, another thing I need to think about as I write. Adverbs. Adjectives. The word "was." Y'all are killing me. I am already having a hard enough time as it is - and some of you know I overthink things. You do understand what this conversation is doing to me right? Right? RIGHT?

 

[Kumquatqueen]

Stories on Lit (or stories in general) are trying to evoke a mood. It's not a case of wanting to transmit info to the reader as succinctly as possible.

So while work writing generally needs all adjectives removed unless there's evidence and footnotes defending them, a story generally wants some. And a few adverbs. Just apply carefully, rarely clumping more than one together, and not using too many fancy ones, or you sound like an excited fourteen year old girl writing fanfic for the first time.

When I edit, half my ands and buts become full stops. My first drafts always have long run-on sentences. Anyone would think I was tired and drugged up when I wrote them...

 

[FifthEstate]

Adverbs are my downfall. I've developed a checklist of 53 words, not entirely adverbs, and use the find function in Word to list all their occurrences. I immediately eliminated 95% of them, changed the sentence to eliminate another 3%, and the remaining 2% had the impact I initially thought every occurrence had.

It's damned tedious, though.

I will try that or something similar.

 

[Bazzle]

I use too many commas and not enough full stops.

As I have got 20 odd stories on here, its taking me time to reedit them all!

I can never remember what adverb is...