titles, titles, and all the rest

[Senna Jawa]

Karma Dog used to carry a thread in which he was collecting attractive titles (or titles about which he could crack a joke ). Too bad that he is not active these days on our board.

In this thread post the titles of poems, where the title is in your opinion artistically attractive. First of all think about your own poems, then about poems posted on Literotica, and finally about any poems. We may consider this thread as an informal competition, with the rules, if any, established later (I would simply decide the issue except that I may like to propose a few titles too, which would render me useless as a referee). I am thinking about two stages. The first one would result in a healthy bunch of good titles. Then we may decide which of these titles, besides being great on their own, are contributing the most to their poems, which of them are integrated with the restr of the text. They should add and complemet the poems instead of explaining them or outright stealing an effect frommthe poem. Ok, okeedockee, go for it!

 

[Lauren Hynde]

I'll bite.

Still Born Soldiers

 

[Icingsugar]

I'll bite.

Still Born Soldiers

Where do that link go?

/Ice - will bite soon...

 

[Lauren Hynde]

Oops.

 

[Icingsugar]

Titles are IMO mainly about making the title a part of the poem, so that a reader is in the intended mindset when starting the read.

I usually cringe at most of my own titles, but those two I think works well with the content.
Signal to Signal
Hyper Poetry


And form the top o' my head, here are some from Lit poems with titles that added value to the poems...
Kodiak Moment (hale)
just add starlight (smithpeter)
Trans Dermic Words (lin)

More to come. I'll scout.

 

[Guest]

In this thread post the titles of poems, where the title is in your opinion artistically attractive.

I don't know about artistic but, to me a title should grab a person's interest first. Some of mine that I was happy with .......

Reflections on a Ham Sandwich

Peeling Onions makes you Cry

Hippocratic Hypocrite

A House Divided

and Between the Covers

....now I'll go and search through the poems for other's titles that appeal o me.

 

[Senna Jawa]

c'mon!

Should I close my informal competition?

C'mon virgins and perverts and macho guys and wonder women and bi-s and whatever-- don't be shy or cowards or whatever. Only those who have posted here can expect poetic Nirvana.

 

[perks]

mine:
the whore's lament

spirit unfinished

rubáiyát junky

others:
maritime licks

counting cadence

the Stylization of Self

poetic crimes

have to say, while some of these are not my favorite poems, the titles lend themselves the best, anyway.

 

[Senna Jawa]

now or afterwards?

On another forum, when I recently conducted a small competition, I was even more informal, because I would comment on the entries right away, during the competition. Should I do the same here? Or should I wait till I decide to close it?

 

[jthserra]

A Few Titles...

A few titles of mine:


The Sensuous Art of Sushi

Fish, Watermelon and Despair

To Show in the Kentucky Seahorse Derby

More Than Raindrops on Tiny Lives

Moonlight on the Rocks


several not posted at lit:

"The Wine Stained Napkins of Summer"

"The Porridge King"

"Chronic Exhumations"


Some titles I liked by others here:

Möbius Strip by Lauren Hynde

it's not just the title... I am captivated by this poem. The structure of the poem, the powerful cycle within and a perfect title.


Home Schooling for the Dead by RisiaSkye

wow... impact!


As far as Senna Jawa poems...

a stroll across some grammar

logarithmic in a compact car




An interesting thread, titles can be such an integral part of a poem. A good title is so much better than: untitled1, untitled2 etc. Of course I always fear that my poem will not live up to the title...


jim

 

[perks]

Re: now or afterwards?

On another forum, when I recently conducted a small competition, I was even more informal, because I would comment on the entries right away, during the competition. Should I do the same here? Or should I wait till I decide to close it?

It's yo' game, playah.


btb, jthserra, do you title before or after?

Icingsugar will get a kick out of this. I always title after I write, I was told that "the title is the frosting to your cake". The cake has to taste good, but if the frosting is all kinds of fucked up, no one is going to get to it, well, maybe the real foodees will.

 

[Rybka]

Re: Re: now or afterwards?

It's yo' game, playah.


btb, jthserra, do you title before or after?

Icingsugar will get a kick out of this. I always title after I write, I was told that "the title is the frosting to your cake". The cake has to taste good, but if the frosting is all kinds of fucked up, no one is going to get to it, well, maybe the real foodees will.

Perks, then you cannot enter any of the "same title" contests. Actually, I do both. At times I have written to a title I really like, ("Piper at the Edge of Dawn" for example), but more often I draw the title out of the mostly completed work and then tweak both to fit. (Another title I liked was "Orgamised Religion".)

Senna, why call it a competion? Keep it a running themed thread like Karmadog's, and comment as you feel like it.

Regards, Rybka

 

[perks]

Re: Re: Re: now or afterwards?

Perks, then you cannot enter any of the "same title" contests. Actually, I do both. At times I have written to a title I really like, ("Piper at the Edge of Dawn" for example), but more often I draw the title out of the mostly completed work and then tweak both to fit. (Another title I liked was "Orgamised Religion".)

Senna, why call it a competion? Keep it a running themed thread like Karmadog's, and comment as you feel like it.

Regards, Rybka

ahhh, you're right, and I have been in those challenges. Okay, I mostly title afterwards, except when I'm doing lit challenges. <which happen to be some of my best work, so I shouldn't discount them at all>

Ohhhh Orgamised Religion? was that you? I'll have to check you out next.

 

[perks]

Cordelia brought up Rybka's Quantum Mechanics in another thread, I think it's a perfect title for commenting.

 

[Lauren Hynde]

the link

Quantum Mechanics


And I say go for it. Whenever you feel like it.

 

[Rybka]

Titles of a Fish

A few people have begun to read and comment on some of my older poems. I thank them and invite others to follow suit.

(In reference to my short humorous poems, I would like to explain once more that some of the humor is not original with me and I never have claimed that it is. When I wrote most of them I was under the influence of Senna style minimalism. They were written as exercises; attempts to say something (tell a joke) in a poetic format and in as few words as possible.)

*********

In answer to Senna Jawa's title challenge, here are some of mine that I like best:

*Snow Showers*
One of the few titles with non-letter beginnings that mama kitty let stand. I assume that this is because the asterisks are a physical image of the theme in this poem.

Acerbic Acid
I thought this a very appropriate title and have been surprised at how little response and comment it has drawn.

A Song of the SeaSon
A double meaning title. (needs 3 votes)

BUTTERFLY BOOTS
What else could I call it? The memory of a friend and an E that still needs 2 votes.

Celestial Mechanics
Its a bit like "Quantum Mechanics" (which you can't get to from here)

EMOTIONAL MULCH
The title comes from the first strophe.

Homemade Memory Soup
My favorite title of all my Lit. posted work.

Lawyer In the Morning
This title had to be; in order to understand the poem

Of Words And Bones
Another poem derived from the memories of a friend, and the title from her words.

Pull Only The Weeds
I like the way this title expands the body of the poem.

Stripers and the Strega Kid
Part of a trilogy, this poem's title was adopted from a Jean Shepherd story and the nickname stuck in real life.

What Has Got Rot
This, of course is a play on words that reflects the theme of the poem.

Wounded Eyes
I just like the phrase and image it creates. The poem is dated now (1999) and yet still needs 2 votes.

Well those are my favorites out of the 175 poems I have posted here on Literotica. Now I will go look for others'.


Regards, Rybka

 

[Rybka]

Titles 3 by Others

Here is one by Denis Hale that I like: Fucking The Black Hole
and on the same site: To Water a Garden, Lewdly by Julie Walczesky
and Microsoftly by Manjaro

 

[champagne1982]

Well it's the title that grabs me. Like a song's words though, I can never remember the title, but if it's a wonderful poem, then its song remains with me.

I only have a couple of titles that are grabby by my standards:

Ulalations and Undulations -- When I read this poem I can hear the Arab mourning women or even an Imam calling the faithful, all laid over the whining hum of the orchestra and jingly rhythms of the bells.

Why Mormons Don't Dance -- I get many comments on this title. My only defense is that the word "Mormon" suits better than "Hutterite".

Agonies -- This title is an illustration of what this experience can feel like.

Now I'm going to try to remember which titles I find most evocative.

 

[jthserra]

answering perks question: Do I title before or after I write the poem

I guess the answer is yes... I title before and after, and sometimes in between. It will vary, depending upon the poem and the inspiration.

A lot of my poems are playing with words, odd words or ones with varying or ambigious meanings that I stumble across reading and in the dictionary. Usually that poem title will be the word, so the title was chosen prior to writing.

In other cases, what inspires a poem is a phrase that comes to me... if the phrase is suitable for a title, then again I started with the title.

and then there are others where I am finished with the poem and I develop a title.


jim

 

[Rybka]

XTAABAY

A poet who has gone unnoticed by many of the Lit. family is my friend Xtaabay. She is on an extended field trip in Mexico collecting data for her dissertation and consequently has not been around to submit new work nor to list her favorite titles, so I will list some of my choices. These are just my choice of titles. Xtaabay is an excellent poet and I invite you all to go read more of her writings (and give her a Christmas vote in her absentia).

So here are my title choices from Xtaabay's posted work. Click the link to read the poem and see how the title fits in.

"My hair will be long"

Clouded Stranger

Contrast in Cranberry

In the Midst of Captured Image

Meandering Spider

Of Candles and Darkness

She Sifts Stardust

Spinning Color



Regards, Rybka

 

[Senna Jawa]

I'll bite.

Still Born Soldiers

This is a very strong title, especially journalistically/politically, but it is also very strong poetically.

It's a pity that the cliched poem was nothing, didn't do anything. It didn't add anything to the title nor to the existing huge body of pacifistic or simply human poems about the war.

(I've written one pacifistic poem when I was young, younger than Lauren , and another one ten years later, both in Polish. They were not too long, not too short. The first one was titled, I think, "to the young ones". It was an appeal to them, something like: this world will be green in bloom, if only you, on your unamputated legs, will not march across the graves. The second one tried to go to the core of the issue. It said that while thousands are dying, millions are cheering and rejoicing. There was a bit more to that poem, it had addressed the macho thingy too ).

 

[Senna Jawa]

Titles are IMO mainly about making the title a part of the poem, so that a reader is in the intended mindset when starting the read.

Signal to Signal
Hyper Poetry

Kodiak Moment (hale)
just add starlight (smithpeter)
Trans Dermic Words (lin)

Title "Signal to Signal" is ok, and no more, nothing special (and the poem itself is embarrassingly bad; BTW, replace "it's" by "its"). Title "Hyper Poetry" is poor (and the poem is pretty weak).

"Kodiac moments" (by Denis Hale) is a very nice title, and the poem is fine too (save for a few weaknesses). And the poem and the title work together ok. Not better than ok because no additional value is produced by their composition. If value of each is say 10 and 10, then arithmetic total is 10+10=20, but in the case of compositions (be it an engine or a poem) yuo wish for 10+10=200. You're happy when 10+10 > 20. In the given case of Denis' piece we get 10+10=19 or so, less than 20. Why? Because the poem just uses the title's goodies instead of spanning space together with the title. hus the poem weakens the impression from the title alone by kind of talking about ther title. (In the case of "Still Born Soldiers" we had 10+1=2--the poem is murdering the title).

If I had to compare "Kodiac..." title with "Still Born Soldiers", I would not choose one over the other. "Kodiac..." is more poetic. "Still..." is stronger, more forceful.

A few words about Denis' title. "Kodiac" strongly associates with Kodak and kodak, i.e. with photography. There is also Kodiac Island in Alaska, and there are kodiac bears. All this is well reflected in the poem. On the top of it poetry lovers must hear also "Zodiac" in "Kodiac", which makes for a nice impression.

This title also works nicely as a total, "Kodiac moments". We hear the click of a photo camera, we identify that moment extracted (caught) from the time continuum.

The cheap "just add starlight" is a horrible title (and the poem is pathetic).

The last title mentioned by Ice, "Trans Dermic Words" (by lin), is interesting while of course unpleasant (and "words" makes it somewhat less interesting). The poem itself is nothing special, it is quite naive. However it reads pleasantly (but for a couple of places) and it works well with the title. The title gains after reading the poem.

 

[Icingsugar]

Senna in da house! I've kind of missed this side of you lately.

Ignoring the fact that you deliver personal impressions and opinions as irreputable facts (I've gotten used to that by now ), there was a few constructive comments here that I wish to reply to.

A few words about Denis' title. "Kodiac" strongly associates with Kodak and kodak, i.e. with photography. There is also Kodiac Island in Alaska, and there are kodiac bears. All this is well reflected in the poem. On the top of it poetry lovers must hear also "Zodiac" in "Kodiac", which makes for a nice impression.

This title also works nicely as a total, "Kodiac moments". We hear the click of a photo camera, we identify that moment extracted (caught) from the time continuum.

Never thought ofd the Zodiac, but not that you mention it, it is yet a cool dimension to it.

I'm sure that you have heard of the expression "Kodak moment", coined in the era of commersial slogans we live in. Having that in mind, a Kodiak Moment both gives you the cold hard facts abot the scene of this narrative poem, we're in Kodiak, we are having a snapshot moment, there is even photography involves. Also, extracting the essence of the Kodak slogan into the poem, it tells of a short snapshot of something a little brighter and more perfect than the world before and after really is. That is to me the essence of the slogan, and therefore it works very well for me, still without telling me too much of what will discover through the read. That is why I thought it was a good title, in fact the clearly best of the ones I listed.

The last title mentioned by Ice, "Trans Dermic Words" (by lin), is interesting while of course unpleasant (and "words" makes it somewhat less interesting). The poem itself is nothing special, it is quite naive. However it reads pleasantly (but for a couple of places) and it works well with the title. The title gains after reading the poem.

Though I agree with you that "words" is not nessecary (What is a poem without words?), this and your numeric explanation made me realise that we look at titles in slightly different ways. A title for me is the window to the poem, it is there to make you want to start reading. So it should say enough, but not so much about the content that the poem then doesn't give the reader a plethora of additional experience. As such this one also works very well as a teaser for me, the poerty consumer.

If I have a title that ties a poem together perfectly, and leaves no surprises inside, then doesn't that make the poem redundant?

/Ice

 

[Maria2394]

hey senna

while I am sure that most of my poetry won't stand up to your definitions, I will submit a couple of titles for you to chew on

my favorite titles of my own would be

1) hiding behind trees in december

2) More Mia More

3) Nothing New in Smutville

( the above poem is about the irrelevence of OLD old news and why in the world is everyone so damned concerned with the weather all the time? its not like anything we do can actually change it.. maybe its just me...but I dont think so..)

4) transcriptus absurdus ( my halloween poem)

other peoples titles I love would be

1) all the ones, by steve porter

and of COURSE, Julie's sonnet, by steve porter

2)Dopplers Illusion , by annaswirls

3) butterfly boots, by rybka

4)Undress Blues, by neonurotic

5) masochistic whore , by neourotic

( i think that neo is excellent at choosing titles, and in my opinion, his stuff rocks...I love seeing him with a new poem

9) state park toilet, by smithpeter

10) Eating the full moon, by angeline

there are lots more, but those are my favorites