Time transitions

[rikaaim]

I've always had a tough time showing the progression of time. I hate to say that the next day is, "The following day Jan..." I just don't like doing that. Or one of those, "In the morning Frank..." But, is there really anyway to show that a day has passed without just saying it? I can describe the sun rising or the moon setting, but I really only like to do that in the beginning of a story if it must be. If I tried to continue in such a mode, then I would quickly run out of ways of describing the changing sun and moon. Also, I could not use this method for showing a leap in time of multiple days, weeks, months, etc...

Any advice on this transition of time?

 

[Guest]

I asked this same question awhile ago in Time In Stories. The replies were very helpful.

 

[rikaaim]

I asked this same question awhile ago in Time In Stories. The replies were very helpful.

Oo Ooo..thank you. I shall promptly tally forth. Or some shit like that. Thanks for the link.

 

[rikaaim]

I see where the thread is going, and I'm going to continue to read, but I have a more specific question. My story revolves around nothing but night time. Specifically the same setting and situations, just a different night and actions. I'm writing a non-Lit story that involves a spouse coming home and night after night wondering and pondering--things. In the meantime the marriage is struggling and again the ponderings revolve around that. This ties into the other thread I started about the computer blurts. Basically, I want to show the actions of the home degrading, the thoughts of the main character through the written words, and later on show what occurs as consequence. So, for the first bit of my story I just want to show this night life and what's going on in the home. Any thoughts on how to just keep night going on without sounding trite and repeptative?

Anything I don't really want to do is come out and say that three years later they saw each other again. If the situation involves two characters. Maybe for this case I'll just use a dated journal deal. That would seem to solve everything. Yes indeed.

 

[Colleen Thomas]

I break the stories with a centered ***

Anytime a reader sees that they know I am either jumping forward in time or, in a larger work, jumping to toher major characters. I have found it to be a very good device for showing the passing of time without trying to fill the void with descritption or tryihng to make something worth writing about occur in every lapse.

 

[elsol]

"Tell" the reader the time a couple of times, and then trust them to get the point.


Sincerely,
ElSol

 

[Weird Harold]

So, for the first bit of my story I just want to show this night life and what's going on in the home. Any thoughts on how to just keep night going on without sounding trite and repetative?

Anything I don't really want to do is come out and say that three years later they saw each other again. If the situation involves two characters. Maybe for this case I'll just use a dated journal deal. That would seem to solve everything. Yes indeed.

I think how to show how much time has passed depends on how important the amount of time is to the story.

If you end one scene with a drunken couple heading to the bedroom and begin the next with, "John woke up to a stray beam of sunlight stabbing through his eyelids and igniting the fires of a major hangover in the back of his head." the reader can usually figure out that at least one night has passed in the meantime. I's only necessary to (immediately) clarify the amount of time that has passed if it is NOT one night and it's important to the story that more than one night has gone by.

If you show a couple who is NOT drunk going to bed and the main character wakes up in the next scene with a hangover, the reaer is going to very quickly realize that it is later than the next morning because the characer didn't have any reason to expect a hangover when last seen.

If you show a couple heading for the bedroom in one scene and wake a character up with an exuberant three-year-old pouncing on the bed for for a morning cuddle -- especially if there were no children when the last scene ended -- the reaer should quickly realize that three years, a pregnancy and possibly a wedding got left out between the scenes.

If a character is last seen at the pool and dealing with potential sunburn, and is next seen complaining about having to shovel snow or rake leaves, it's pretty easy to guess at least a couple of months have been skipped over.

It all goes back to the Show, don't Tell commandment and involves the advice of Don't underestimate the reader's intellignece.

You can change the weather, season, location, clothing, and almost any bit of scenery and the reader will generally assume a time lapse consistent with the change of scenery. It is only when the general assumption of elapsed time won't accord with the elapsed time you inend that you need to mention time at all.

If you need to pinpoint the new time, you can use holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries to "Show" the time without "Telling" it.

Instead of, Three years later, John arrived at her door with a bouquet of flowers. use dialogue to reveal the time lapse: "Happy third anniversary, Honey," John said, thrusting the bouquet through the small gap the security chain allowed..

Note that I didn't add "when jane opened the door to his knock" -- that's unimportant timing information that is implied by the fact there was a gap to shove the bouquet through. It's also part of the point -- Don't try to over control the timing, let the reader figure it out for themselves.

 

[rikaaim]

I think how to show how much time has passed depends on how important the amount of time is to the story.

Don't try to over control the timing, let the reader figure it out for themselves.

That's a lot of great advice. It certainly helps with the future issues I was thinking about, but my specific present issue remains.

How about some ideas for just passing a story by day by day, but omitting the day? I want it to go from one night to the next. The main character comes home, does the evening thing, goes to bed. Then skip the whole next day to when she comes home again. I have some ideas of my own that I've been trying out, but I've been getting some great answers and would love some more ideas.

 

[Weird Harold]

How about some ideas for just passing a story by day by day, but omitting the day? I want it to go from one night to the next. The main character comes home, does the evening thing, goes to bed. Then skip the whole next day to when she comes home again. I have some ideas of my own that I've been trying out, but I've been getting some great answers and would love some more ideas.

The ideas I gave earlier apply.

Change the weather -- Show relief at getting into the air-conditioning, or putting an umbrella aside to drip-dry. Deal with high winds messing up the hair one day and high humidity causing it to friz the next.

Schedule house-hold tasks -- Bring home groceries on Mondays, do laundry on Fridays, Clean on Wednesdays, etc.

Use the Television -- Give your character some "must see TV" preferences. One day, "I have to be done with this in time for Farscape" and the next, "Damn. Theres' nothing worth watching today"

Even for a recluse, like me, no two days are exactly the same; although I do lose track of what day it is occasionally because unlike your character, I don't leave the house every day.