This is driving me insane...

[NoJo]

There's a smell exactly like fresh cum outside the window of my apartment, which is on the third storey. Really.

 

[Guest]

There's a smell exactly like fresh cum outside the window of my apartment, which is on the third storey. Really.

_____

It's probably fresh cum.





Outside the window of your third story apartment.







Really.

 

[NoJo]

Do pigeons cum?

My theory is that it's some kind of waterproof sealant on the guttering. Or cum.

 

[MathGirl]

Huh

I never realized it had an odor. Or course, I've led a sheltered life.

 

[Guest]

Re: Huh

I never realized it had an odor. Or course, I've led a sheltered life.

_____

You're kidding, right?

 

[MathGirl]

Re: Re: Huh

_____

You're kidding, right?

No, not at all.

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: Re: Huh

No, not at all.

______

Well, the least you could do is ask him to drink some pineapple juice before your next facial.

 

[Lovepotion69]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Huh

______

Well, the least you could do is ask him to drink some pineapple juice before your next facial.

I don't get facials. Can I get some pineapple juice though?

/LP

 

[Guest]

Do pigeons cum?

My theory is that it's some kind of waterproof sealant on the guttering. Or cum.

______

You could ask you super if they did any work recently and complain about the odor.

He could also mention that the wild orgy that took place several days ago, and a few floors up, involved a mass ejaculation "game" by several guys wanking out the window above your apartment aiming at the street hookers below.

(Of course, that is only a theory.)

 

[Guest]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Huh

I don't get facials. Can I get some pineapple juice though?

/LP

_____

Sorry. I only do facials, Lovepotion.

I could run to the store to pick up some pineapple juice, though.

 

[Lovepotion69]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Huh

_____

Sorry. I only do facials, Lovepotion.

I could run to the store to pick up some pineapple juice, though.

I'm gonna be finished with the carton I'm drinking now, so another would be great.

Well, I never tried a facial anyway. I guess everything is worth trying at least once...

/LP

 

[SlickTony]

My husband used to sell sealants. If any of 'em had smelled like fresh cum I'm sure he'd have remarked about it. 'course it could simply be a different brand than what his company wasy carrying.

 

[SlaveMasterUK]

There's a smell exactly like fresh cum outside the window of my apartment, which is on the third storey. Really.

Dare I ask how you discovered this disturbing fact?

Ax

 

[gauchecritic]

Apparently, due to rising costs and a world recession and the organic lobby many building suppliers have taken to using fresh cum as a sealant, just be thankful they didn't use the fanny batter rendering.

(This anecdote will only be intelligible to the British contingent here on Lit but let me assure you it is really really funny)

Gauche

 

[SlickTony]

Ok, so we know they're not using Sonneborn or Master Builders...

 

[NoJo]

Smell seems to have pretty much gone... I think it may have been some rotting garbage in the bins in the street below... anyway, thanks for your support in these difficult last few days. In a way I sort of miss it...


As Rex Harrison sang in My Fair Lady:

I've grown accustomed to that smell...
Like wanking off, or going down...
Although it started off as hell,
It's strange enough to tell...
I've grown accustomed to that smell.

 

[MathGirl]

Poultry

Good grief! Another poet. Errr... doggerelist.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

I think it may have been some rotting garbage in the bins in the street below...

Imagine how easy it is to confuse the smell of rotten garbage with the smell of fresh cum...

 

[NoJo]

It was actually more of a smell of fruit that's overripe. You know like when you dig into the fruit basket and pull out an orange that's starting to mould. A sort of tangy, chemical, sweet, fruity smell. There, SF: Does that sound a little nicer?

 

[SlickTony]

Yeah, well I'm familiar with that smell, especially as people gift us with oranges periodically and I tend not to put them in the fridge because our kitchen is so small it's a hassle to get the door open all the way so you can open the fruit drawer. But I've smelled past-due oranges and I've smelled cum and I don't think they smell that much alike.