This feeling called love (closed)

[Lady_Mornington]

The young woman was sitting by the same table as she always did. Her head tilted slightly to the side, a paperback held in her left hand, a glass of latte in her right. She never seemed to finish her drinks, at least not while they were still hot.

Linnéa used to stop by the 'Café Italia' at least once a day, picking up a coffee before heading to work. The last couple of days she had taken to coming in for another as she finished. It was not that the place was anything special. The drinks rather bland if one was to he honest. It was rather the proxemity to her office that had prompted her patronage of the same. That and the woman seated by the window.

She had noticed her only a few days ago, sitting alone and reading. Her face showing the intense concentration she had devoted to the book at hand, a small furrow creasing her brow as she had expertly turned the page, using the thumb of her left hand. Linnéa had thought she looked sad. The delicate features seemingly shadowed by some grievance. Yet she was exceedingly beautiful, so much that she had kept coming back, hoping to steal a glance of her.

It was not that Linnéa swung that way. She was engaged to be married and thinking herself to be content with it. Her fiancee held a position with one of the City's prominent financial instiutions. A stock broker probably not the ideal match for a woman such as herself but Christian had proved that even a person working in such a dog-eat-dog world could still be capable to love. She found herself thinking about him, he had been away on business for a week and had phoned to tell her that he's probably need to stay a few days more. He had promised her that when he returned they'd go away for the holiday they never seemed to find time for. A week in Tuscany with exquisite cuisine, wines to match it and lovemaking. It sounded good, Linnéa had to agree, but she had become jaded, knowing Christian would surely be caught up in some new project, again having to postpone whatever plans they might have made.

And now she was at the Café Italia, drinking a glass of wine and flicking through a magazine in an attempt to distract herself from the woman sitting but a few feet away from her. She had found herself thinking about her, her heart beating a tad faster as the clock neared five. She knew it was silly a thing to do, and even bordering on stalking. Yet she couldn't bring herself to stay away, even though she knew she'd hardly muster the confidence to approach her. Besides what would she say to her? "Hello I'm besotted by you". She chided herself, thinking it was only because Christian was away and that she was feeling lonely she was doing what she did.

 

[MelancholyBaby]

Laura never needed to wear her watch when she visited the Café Italia. Her time to leave, a little after five, was easily signaled by the setting sun and the line of people that would form around the cash register. That was her signal to head home. Eventually Laura’s life would become more structured and she would need to carry a timepiece but, for now, the café’s zeitgebers would do very nicely. She closed the book she was reading and brought herself slowly back into world. Well, at least into the little world of the café.

Joining the rest of the world would take time. That is what everyone told her; that it would get easier every day, that the pain would lessen as time went on. They were not only foolish but wrong as well. It didn’t lessen, it didn’t get easier. Laura brought the mug to her lips, frowning a bit as the lukewarm liquid pooled in her mouth. She swallowed quickly, forcing the taste from her mouth. She would need to get another before she headed home; she was much too lazy to brew a pot of coffee later. She reached for her purse from the chair across from hers, sliding her book inside before extracting her wallet. Laura stood up to move to the end of the line when she noticed her.

Laura had seen the woman before, she was not sure how many times or how frequently but she definitely remembered her. The line wasn’t moving fast and gave Laura time to examine her. She was attractive and put together. She was a woman that, in any other situation, would have intimidated Laura. Yet for some reason here in the quaint Café Italia Laura didn’t feel intimidated; instead, she felt drawn to her. The line moved slowly and during that time Laura was careful to look away as the woman would look up and around. The last thing she needed was to be in the incredibly awkward position of staring at another woman.

Laura turned slightly, her eyes scanning over the other patrons of the café. The man, there, the one with the double espresso…she should have been examining him instead; or the even the new male barista who was still learning how to properly steam milk. Not a woman. Laura stole a few more glances at her before she finally reached the front of the line. And then it happened.

“Two medium Chai teas with skim milk, to go,” she murmured to the barista, handing him a ten dollar bill. She felt her face flush as she knew what she had just done. Dropping her change into the tip jar she moved down the counter. Typically she watched the creation of her drink but today all she could do was send quick glances in the direction of the woman. And finally it was finished; the two cups presented to her.

Laura’s heart beat wildly in her chest as she walked back to her table and collected her things, slipping her coat on and stuffing the pockets with her gloves. Slinging her purse over her shoulder she picked up the two cups again and made her way toward the woman’s table. Laura stood awkwardly for a moment while she looked down to see what magazine she was reading. It was one of Laura’s favorites, too. A small wave of relief washed over her, giving her strength to speak.

“Hi. I accidentally ordered an extra tea…would you like it?” Yes, a lie, an obvious lie. But right now it was the only thing that Laura could think to do.

 

[Lady_Mornington]

“Hi. I accidentally ordered an extra tea…would you like it?”

Linnéa felt her heart skip a beat as she heard the question. Feeling how a blush coloured her cheeks as she looked up for the first time daring to meet her gaze. She had watched the woman intently as she had made her way to the bar, for a moment standing only a few inches from herself. Her mouth suddenly parched, having to cough in order not to croak out the reply. Not able to remember the last time she'd ever been as nervous as this.

"Oh are you leaving, I mean...you...Yes I'd like that thank you.."

She wanted to die then and there, her nervousness so readily discernable and the way she had displayed her disappointment must clearly make her think her a nutter. Reaching for her wallet, offering to pay for the tea receiving a shy smile in response. Linnéa found herself returning it, equally shyly. The woman had made no intention to leave but remained standing next to her table. Once again she bit her lip, but willing herself to sound confident as she spoke again.

"I'm sorry, where are my manners. Why don't you sit down..." the last words almost a shade begging and she cursed herself silently, God I don't even want to know what I come across as....

"Yes why not, I'm Laura." She had smiled again, the way that bespoke sorrow and gave her face a look of classic beauty. She tilted her head slightly to the side as she extended her hand. They sat in silence for a few seconds, none of them knowing what to say, the situation at the same time akward and throughly enjoyable, at least as far as Linnéa was concerned. Laura had looked at her, seemingly piercing what ever pretences she may have had, silently asking the questions that Linnéa herself had been rehearsing a thousand times.

Something in her posture, the way that she looked at her, at the same time so very open but also very guarded. It seemed to Linnéa that although Laura was being friendly enough, there would be sides to her that she'd never allow showing. Perhaps it was the wine, or the the smile she'd offered as Linnéa had introduced herself that prompted her to reach out, gently touching her fingers. Blushing as she did, the gesture seemingly vulgar, but the way that Laura had responded, had reinforced her. They talked for an hour or so, their teas forgotten, and when the waitress asked if she could get them anything more they were holding hands. The realisation both scaring her and making her feel more elated than she'd done for a very long time.

Standing outside the 'Café Italia', not quite knowing what to say. The intimacy they shared seemed to have disappeared as soon as they had left, leaving a hollow in Linnéa's chest. Neither herself nor Laura seemed to be eager to part company, but none knew what to say to make the moment last. Laura was about to say something, her bodylanguage hinting that she'd be leaving, taking her hand and giving it a squeeze with the words "I'll see you around won't I?"

Linnéa had nodded and on a spur, had leaned closer, embracing her and pressing her lips to her cheek, inhaling the scent of her perfume and feeling the warmth of her skin.

"I don't want you to leave..."

Spoken in a nothing but a whisper...

 

[MelancholyBaby]

"I don't want you to leave..."

Linnéa’s voice was soft; there was an almost plea-like gentleness to it that warmed Laura’s heart. She would not be honest enough to admit it, but she didn’t want to leave either. There was something about Linnéa that, even in the short time they knew each other, felt infinitely familiar and comforting. There was something else, too; a sort of affection that was so sudden that it frightened Laura, especially after what had just happened. She would proceed, but with caution.

Laura closed her eyes briefly as she took in the scent of Linnéa’s hair and the soft brush of her lips on her cheek. No, she didn’t want to leave. “I won’t leave, Linnéa.” Laura eased her way from the embrace, her eyes meeting her new friend’s and then lowering shyly. A couple stepped between the duo; excusing themselves as they entered the coffee shop. Laura began walking away from the door, motioning for Linnéa to follow.

“Have you eaten? I’m famished. I don’t remember eating today, but then again I’m a bit absent-minded.” Laura smiled easily as the two began walking toward an unknown destination. “Would you like to get something to eat somewhere? I’m open to suggestions; I’ve not lived here long so I’m not sure where the best food is.” Laura realized she was rambling a bit and closed her mouth, silently praying that Linnéa would take her up on her offer.

“I’m used to take out these days,” Linnéa said. “I work near here so there are a few places I frequent.”

“You work around here,” Laura interrupted, excitedly. “I live around here.” She pointed to an upper over the building next door to the Café Italia. “That is me. Right there. What a small world!” Laura blushed as she realized how juvenile she sounded. “I’m sorry to interrupt. I am so rude sometimes. You were saying?” Laura looked over at Linnéa just then, noticing how the chilly air had made her cheeks rosy and how she could see her warm breath against the cold night. She looked beautiful then.

“You’re fine,” Linnéa said, smiling. “There is a little place a few blocks away that has great sandwiches. Another place about a mile away that makes good salads, and an Italian place next to that.” Laura’s hand brushed against Linnéa’s gently; subtly. “I guess it just depends on what you like.” Laura squeezed Linnéa’s hand as she spoke the last few words. She hadn’t meant to. She waited for her to pull away, the cozy atmosphere of the café gone, surrounded by a bitterly cold night. But she didn’t. Instead Linnéa squeezed back.

“Tell you what, new friend. Let’s grab a bottle of wine and then go to my apartment and we can order something in. Watch movies or talk or…I don’t know, make cookies or something.” That sounded utterly ridiculous and reaching, Laura was sure of it. “You just can’t say anything about the décor. It’s sort of ‘girl gets back on her feet’ chic.” They chuckled together and Laura realized she had revealed more to Linnéa than she meant to. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust her, but it was too soon and too new and, quite frankly Linnéa was too…female.

But they were holding hands.

And her heart was reaching.

And if there was one thing Laura knew with absolute certainty, it was that her heart would force her to follow its lead.

“So what do you say, Linnéa? Shall we?”

 

[Lady_Mornington]

Linnéa was a bundle of nerves, but it didn't feel strange, rather the opposite. Laura's hand squeezing her own the closeness of her on the almost empty street, the fact that she had kissed her cheek only a few moments earlier.

Tell you what, new friend. Let’s grab a bottle of wine and then go to my apartment and we can order something in. Watch movies or talk or…I don’t know, make cookies or something.”

"I'm terribly bad at baking cookies Laura, but I could make us dinner if you want to." There was still a shyness in the way she spoke, desperately wanting Laura to approve of her yet not wanting to sound too needy, Squeezing Laura's hand again and adding with a smile "so we'd better get two bottles of wine, we can't make dinner without drinking you know."

Laura had nodded and pulled her closer as another couple had passed them, holding hands seemingly oblivioius to the rest of the world. She found herself looking at them as they passed and saw that Laura did the same. They were still holding hands and she wondered for a moment if they thought about the same thing.

"Sounds like an idea, there's a Safeway down the block, you pick the groceries and I chose the wine." She had looked at Linnéa in the way that made her heart race, tilting her head slightly to the side, a small smile on her lips. Not daring to speak, too afraid that she'd stammer Linnéa responded with a nod.

The supermarket was almost deserted, the lull between the daily shoppers and the rush of closing time. Laura had walked ahead of her, basket in one hand but not letting go of her hand. Choosing two bottles of Cianti "after all they had been at the Café Italia" making Linnéa giggle. Not so much at the pun but at the way that she had dared phrase the reason to their newfound friendship or liason. Linnéa wasn't sure what to call it but it felt good. Yes better than anything she'd experienced during the last year.

Picking up the groceries she needed, "Got to stick to the general Italian theme" but not divulging the menu. Linnéa enjoyed cooking, but with Christian spending so much time away there had been few occassions when she could put her skill to use. Cooking for one never felt satisfactory enough.

As they left the Safeway the weather had changed, rain pouring down in heavy drops, making the street vitually deserted, yet Laura had pulled her out into the downpour, tilting her head and let the rain cascade against it.

"Feel that Linnéa, it makes you feel like your skin is being reborn." Then she had laughed, the pearly laughter that had sent her heart racing even faster than it already did.

Her flat was homely, the furniture a mixture of old and well-worn and new IKEA-esqué. True to her promise Linnéa hadn't said anything about it although silently finding it to be more homely than ever her own flat would be. None of them seemed keen on letting go though, their hands finding eachother as if they feared the parting.

She had brought her Ipod, as Laura had excused her lack of a suitable music. Plugging it into her stereo and whilst Linnéa busied herself with the cooking and Laura opened the first bottle.

"Got to try it in case it's poisoned, wouldn't want that to happen to my chef."

She had given her a wink as she poured the wine, standing in close attendance as Linnéa made the pesto and the tomatosauce to go with the risoni they'd bought. All to the sound of Jarvis Cocker retelling Sheffield dreams and Brett Anderson's sexually ambigious tales of the England that no one cared to mention.

They had talked, discussing everyday issues at first. Linnéa told her about herself, born in Sweden to a British father and Swedish mother, an only child going to university studying history and ending up as a Ph D student and now managing to secure a position as a junior lecturer. Laura had been more guarded and she had not pressed the issue. It was enough to be here with her now. When she excused herself it struck Linnéa that the void she had left felt unproportionally large and she had to focus on the cooking not to look over her shoulder every other second. It was scary how such a recent acquaintance could influence her so thoroughly.

"She's an auburn-hair girl, from a town of Spanish sand, and she went through junior high with a radio in her hand, and she never talks to the country kids, she just moves with the time like her mother did"

Sarah Cracknell of Saint Etienne was whispering the lyrics as Laura returned, placing her arms around Linnéa's waist and leaning her head on her shoulder. The gesture prompting her to lean back, to feel more of her body pressed against hers.

"It smells wonderful Linn, and good thing cause' I'm starving."

Then a small giggle and her lips pressing against Linnéa's cheek, making her blush as well as gasping her hand going to rest on her hip. Not daring to say anything lest she broke whatever magic that existed between them

 

[MelancholyBaby]

"It smells wonderful Linn, and good thing cause' I'm starving." Just smelling Linnéa’s creation was making Laura’s stomach growl. The wine had made her a bit more like her old self, chipping a thin layer of rock from the walls she had erected to protect herself. Laura’s arms felt comfortable around Linnéa’s slender waist, she was the perfect size. Honestly, Linnéa was perfect in many ways. Laura placed her head on Linnéa’s shoulder, watching as she cooked. Cooking was like art to Laura, an art form that she wasn’t very good at. She had watched Linnéa and admired the way she knew what to do, even in the kitchen of a stranger.

Laura didn’t understand, and perhaps she wasn’t even aware of what she was doing, as she placed her lips softly against Linnéa’s cheek. Maybe it had been the way that Linnéa had leaned back toward her, connecting their bodies. Or perhaps it was the wine. But it was something.

Linnéa’s skin was soft. Her complexion was enviable. Laura could see the soft curl of her eyelashes, the angle of her cheek, her profile. Linnéa was beautiful to her.

“I will clean up,” Laura murmured against her cheek. Laura’s arms tightened a bit around Linnéa’s waist, pulling her closer. Then the annoying timer on the stove went off. It must be time for dinner. Laura pulled away but as her face moved back across Linnéa’s ear she whispered “Thank you.”

Laura hurried out of the kitchen then, busying herself with setting the table. Her actions toward Linnéa were too forward and there was no excuse for them. She silently chastised herself. Linnéa would think she was a…but what if Linnéa did think that? She may be right. Laura didn’t know but she promised herself she would lay off the wine and off of Linnéa.

Linnéa entered the room, holding a dish of steaming food that was their dinner. Laura’s heart leapt a bit. It was the first time for this at her apartment, whatever this was. “Is there anything else you need from the kitchen, Linn, anything else to be brought out, let me help,” Laura’s eyes met Linnéa’s and held them for a moment.

“No, it’s alright. Sit down and I’ll be right back.”

Laura felt a bit sheepish at a stranger doing all this work in her home. What an extraordinary person Linnéa was. Laura filled her plate while Linnéa was gone, unable to wait. She was blowing gently on the first bite to cool it when Linnéa approached the table.

“You’re cheating, Laura,” she said playfully.

“I can’t help it if you’re such a good cook that I am unable to wait until you get here to begin eating.” Laura smiled.

“You haven’t even tried it yet, silly.”

Laura remedied that just then, taking her fork into her mouth and tasting Linnéa’s creation. She chewed slowly, savoring the rich flavor. “Yes, I have,” she said smartly. "And it is excellent. Now sit down and eat!” Laura had refilled Linnéa’s glass while she was in the kitchen.

“I bet you cheat at cards, too.” Linnéa winked, her face bright and beautiful.

“I most certainly do not cheat at cards. I would win if I knew how to cheat at cards, Linn.” She took another bite; Linnéa’s cooking the best she had had in years. Even better than Michael’s. “You only are saying that because you have a guilty conscience because you cheat at cards.” The two burst out laughing. It was silly laughter. It was comfortable laughter. “Seriously, Linn, do you think, sometime, you could show me how to make this?”

“Of course, Laura. I’d like that.” Her voice was soft. Laura loved the way Linnéa said her name. There was something familiar and comforting about it. She would recognize it in a room full of people.

“I would like that, too. Thank you for coming over, Linn.” Laura stopped. “You don’t mind if I call you Linn instead of Linnéa, do you? I’m sorry, I should have asked first.” Laura lowered her head, examining the little bit of dinner she had left on her plate.

“No, I don’t mind. I like it when you call me Linn for some reason.” Laura lifted her head and smiled, hers returned by Linnéa’s smile. “And thank you for having me over.”

“You are welcome anytime, dear,” Laura said. And she meant it.

 

[Lady_Mornington]

Even though Laura had promised to attend the washing-up they ended up doing it together. Neither of them seemed to keen to part even for the few minutes that it would take. Standing close to each other, Laura washing and rinsing and Linnéa putting it on the rack. Their hands touching from time to time, bringing colour to Linnéa's cheeks although Laura seemed so very natural about it. On the stereo Jarvis Cocker was making the observations of failed relations and the lyrics reminded Linnéa of Christian. Right now it seemed that the song could be about her. It made her pause, putting down the plate and turning her face away from Laura, not wanting her to see how rattled she'd been by the it.

And every touch reminds you of just how sweet it could have been
And every time he kisses you, you get the taste of saccharine.
It's not easy to forget me, it's so hard to disconnect
When it's electronically reprocessed to give a more life-like effect
A bad cover version of love is not the real thing

And that was it, Christian was the bad cover version of love, the thought hitting here with almost physical an impact. Worldessly reaching out to Laura.

"Hey Linn what's the matter." She spoke softly as she held her, resting Linnéa's head on her shoulder, her left caressing her hair, her right arm wrapped around her waist.

She couldn't phrase it in words as she hugged Laura tighter to herself. Knowing that instant that she'd give up everything for the woman now holding her if she wanted her to.

"I guess I'd better go." She whispered the words, still holding on to Laura, the action belying the words.

"No you're not Linn," Laura disentangled herself, giving her an intent look. "I will not let you wander of alone, not before you tell me what's wrong." Her eyes boring into Linnéa's. "Besides it's pouring down outside." Laura had added the last with a smile.

She braved herself to smile but she couldn't bring herself to tell her what had rattled her so much. "I'm sorry Laura, I guess it was nothing really." Squeezing her hand again as Laura gave her one of her a knowing looks, obviously seeing right through the shallow explanation Linnéa had offered.

"OK but I don't think you should go home to an empty apartment in your current state, not that there's something wrong with you" She had added with a wry smile "but in case this 'nothing' turns into 'something' you'd better stay where I can see you."

She had smiled again and it struck Linnéa that although Laura may look delicate, fragile even she was in possesion of seemingly an immense reservoir of strenght. Linnéa had never been good tackling emotionally related issues, she hated confrontations as did Christian. On the surface their relationship sported no blemishes, they never fought or argued, mainly because none of them could face up to it. Instead they pretended that differences of opinion did not exist and she in particular tended to overlook every broken promise of his. Laura on the other hand struck Linnéa as being the kind of person who addressed troubles as they arose and although it frightened her, it still held a certain appeal.

"And we still have a movie to watch. I've been putting up with your horrible Britpop for hours now so it's time you got a dose of proper culture." Her comment accentuated to sound even more disapproving as they sat down. "They don't make movies like this anylonger," Laura had rummaged through her collections of DVD:s settling for 'Breakfast at Tiffany's', a film Linnéa was vaguely familiar with but had never seen.

Truth to tell she couldn't focus on the antics of Holly Golightly as portrayed by Ms Hepburn. Laura on the other hand seemed transfixed, nudging her to "you have to look at this" or "this is really the best scene". The enthusiasm she displayed was heartwarming, and resembled her own passion for music, seeing perhaps where Laura found her inspiration. The grand dames of a Hollywood of the past; Rita Hayworth, Bette Davies, Audrey Hepburn and Marilyn of course. The way she could quote the lines as well as singing along to 'Moon River' was endearing.

Linnéa hadn't paid too much attention to the film though, she sat next to Laura, legs tucked up benath her and Laura's arm placed around her shoulders, feeling her eyelids grow heavier by the second, and as the credits rolled across the screen she was asleep.

"If you're going to sleep I'd better get you tucked in."Laura had whispered to her, gently disentangling herself and looked at her. The words making her heart race, of course she wanted to stay, although she'd never dreamt of asking. Nodding, not daring to say anything lest her voice betrayed her but willing herself to say something "It's ok I could crash on the coach." She had blushed as she blurted out the thoroughly dishonest offer. "Nonsense, and if you do you'll freeze to death, the landlord turns of the heat at midnight so the only reasonably warm place is in the bed. And given that you're practically pint-sized there will be more than enough room." They had both giggled, Linnéa was not that much shorter than Laura.

She got to borrow a spare tooth-brush as well as one of Laura's t-shirts, getting undressed in the bathroom, not quite knowing what else to do. She felt a bit embarressed as she slid the bra off, but braced herself. It was not like they were going to...Linnéa didn't finish the thought, knowing that if she was to be honest with herself the idea of making love to Laura had crossed her on a number of times already.

Laura was in bed and pulled the covers back, making room for her. Finding herself to lay close to her, and resting her head on Laura's shoulder, her leg gently draped across hers.

"I love you"

The words reapeated themselves in her mind as she looked at her.

"I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you"

But never crossing her lips....

 

[MelancholyBaby]

Laura closed her eyes. It was a futile gesture; there was no possible way she would be able to sleep. The warmth and comfort of Linnéa’s body, while welcome, was a bit too welcome. It was as if her entire world had been turned upside down in a matter of hours. Linnéa was everywhere. When Laura closed her eyes she saw her. When she opened her eyes she was there beside her. She could smell Linnéa, could feel her head resting on her shoulder. Laura could not escape her. She wasn’t sure she wanted to.

Laura was aware of how close they were together, how only the thin layer of their nightshirts separated them. It felt perfectly natural for her to sleep next to Linnéa, comfortable. It had been some time since she had slept with another person, and never before had she slept with another girl. The room was cold and Laura pulled the blankets up further around them, unconsciously moving closer to Linnéa.

It was silent, darkness hung like a heavy curtain in the sparsely decorated room. Laura’s eyes darted toward Linnéa, watching the gentle motion of her diaphragm as she breathed. She could hear her breathe; she could feel her breath upon her shoulder. She looked vulnerable just then and Laura wanted more than anything to wrap her arms around her and protect her from the cruel world. She saw Linnéa stir and Laura realized she was still awake.

“Linn,” Laura whispered. “Are you still awake.”

“Yes.”

“Maybe we didn’t drink enough wine to make us sleepy.”

“We’ll have to try harder next time.” Linnéa spoke of next time. Maybe she didn’t mean it like that. Laura was counting on a next time and hoping for many times after that.

“We will have to set a good example for each other.” It was silent again, an awkward silence this time. “Linn,” Laura said, her voice barely audible, “Do you sometimes feel like you’re alone? That you’re outside of the world looking inside through a glass window? That you really don’t, I don’t know, touch it? That even when you are close enough to something, when you think you have it…it’s not really there?”

“Yes, Laura.” She knew too well.

“I thought I had something before. It was perfect and beautiful and joyful. It was the kind of thing I dreamed of as a girl, we were going to have a fairy-tale wedding with white roses and orchids and a beautiful dress and a tall white cake with pink flowers on it, for me.” A lump formed in Laura’s throat and she struggled to swallow it. She felt Linnéa draw closer, instinctively knowing that is what Laura needed.

“I wanted to be everything to him, for him. I was for a little while. Then he met another woman. He said she understood him.” Laura’s voice grew more agitated. “He said she made him feel different than any woman had made him feel. Including me.” She paused. “He was the only man I ever loved. He’s helped me out, he helped me get this apartment and such. But he doesn’t want me the way I wanted him.”

“I’ve been alone for awhile now. I’ve had time to think, maybe. It wasn’t familiar. It was all I knew. I tried hard to mold myself to what he wanted, to what my family and his family wanted. I thought if I could just work a little harder, be a little better that I could be everything he wanted and I would be so happy. I lost sight of myself somewhere along the way.”

Linnéa propped herself up on her elbow as she listened to Laura, able to see the outline of her face in the dark, the hint of tears in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Laura.” Linnéa reached over and gently pushed a lock of her stray brunette hair from the side of Laura’s face and tucked it behind her ear.

Laura smiled weakly. Linnéa’s touch was comforting and gentle and soothed her. “I guess that is what I mean about having nothing. I thought I had something before but I didn’t. And now,” she paused; “Now I don’t have anything. Not even nothing I can pretend is something.”

“That’s not true,” Linnéa said, stroking Laura’s arm softly. “You have me. And we’ll get you a cat to keep you company when I’m not here. We’ll call him ‘Cat’ just like in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Or her. Maybe we should get a girl cat like us. Who can understand guys anyway? Boy cats are probably no different.” She smiled. Laura’s heart melted at the way she smiled. It was genuine and warm and all the things a smile should be. “So what do you say?”

Laura felt little tears form in her eyes. She fought hard to not let them overspill her eyes. “I’d like that. You’re awfully sweet, listening to me carry on like this.” Laura looked briefly away from Linnéa.

“Nonsense. You’d do the same for me.”

“You’re right, Linn.” Laura’s hand found Linnéa’s fingers and entwined them with her own. “I would do the same for you.”
“Good, then it’s settled.” Linnéa slid back under the covers but before she could Laura turned around to face her. They lay on the bed, facing each other, their knees touching, one a tangent to the other.

“Goodnight, Linnéa.” Laura leaned over and brushed Linnéa’s forehead gently with her lips.

“Goodnight, Laura.”

As Laura watched Linnéa’s peaceful descent into sleep her mind wandered. A song stuck in her mind. It was insistent, repeating itself over and over like a one track CD on repeat.

If you’re lost you can look
And you will find me
Time after Time
If you fall I will catch you
I will be waiting
Time after Time

“Yes, Linnéa,” she whispered to the sleeping woman beside her, “I will catch you.”

 

[Lady_Mornington]

Linnéa didn't usually sleep well. Prefering the sofa to hers and Christian's kingsize bed, given the infrequency with which he shared it with her. Now however, laying next to Laura she slept peacefully. They had moved in unison. as she turned so had Laura, keeping her arm protectively around her waist, the warmth of her body soothing and reassuring.

She had woke up just before seven in the morning, feeling loath to leave the bed for the first time in a long time. Laura had stirred, murmuring a protest as she gently disentangled herself from her embrace. The sight was so endearing and she could not resist to gently press her lips to Laura's forehead.

Walking to the kitchen and finding her bag, checking the mobile phone for any messages or missing calls. She wasn't too surprised that there were none to be found. The nagging thought that had occured to her the previous night returning: She could not go on like this. It may be that Laura thought of them as merely being friends but she didn't. She was in love with the woman peacefully sleeping in the next room and the feelings she experienced everything she had ever felt for Christian. She would tell him, she'd break their engagement and move out. That would be the most honest thing to do. Finding the ring on her left hand and gently pulling it off her finger, not wanting to carry the reminder of him on her person.

"Hey Linn, is something the matter?" She turned around a bit startled to see Laura standing next to her. Her hair a bit dishevelled and seemingly only half-awake. Even so she could still see the ring in her hand and the connotations it carried. "Do you want to talk about it?" Laura had spoken quietly as she placed her hand on Linnéa's arm.

"No, not now at least." Linnéa had tried a smile but it felt horribly false. Still Laura didn't press the issue. Instead she made a show at looking at the clock, which she didn't carry. "Look I'm sure it's horribly early and I don't have a time when I need to be somewhere and neither do you." She had winked conspiratorically at Linnéa, who had found it impossible not to laugh at the show she'd put on.

They had gone back to bed, laying next to each other once more, close enough to make the tip of Linnéa's nose brush against Laura making both of them giggle. None of them had said anything, seemingly afraid that by doing so they'd break the fragile moment they shared.

"About the ring, Linn. I'm probably the last person you ought to ask about such things but it seems to me that everything isn't hunk-dory between you and your boyfriend." She had been as straightforward as usual.

"No it isn't Laura." She had taken a deep breath before continuing "It hasn't for a long time to be honest, you told me last night that you tried to change and if you just tried a bit harder it would work out. Well I've tried and it doesn't work out."
She had sought Laura's hand as she spoke, feeling tears burn in the corners of her eyes. The reassuring squeeze did however prompt her to continue, knowing this was the leap of faith.

"When I first saw you I knew you were special, more than that. And well, everything that happened yesterday made me realise on thing Laura. That I've never felt so secure with another person as I do with you and, " She closed her eyes and squeezed Laura's hand for comfort "that I think I love you."

Biting her lip, fearing she'd ruined everything with her outspokenness.

 

[MelancholyBaby]

"When I first saw you I knew you were special, more than that. And well, everything that happened yesterday made me realize one thing Laura. That I've never felt so secure with another person as I do with you and that I think I love you."

Laura’s face flushed and she closed her eyes, clearly moved by Linnéa’s honest and brave revelation. She brought her other hand to Linnéa’s hand and placed it over her small one, stroking gently. Laura could only imagine how hard it must have been for Linnéa to speak those words. Laura had the difficult task of trying to respond to them.

“Linn, sweetheart,” Laura said, gently caressing her friend’s hand. “I am flattered. I truly am. You are special to me, too, I…” Laura’s voice drifted off, the hardened and hurt part of her interfering with her words. “I want to see you happy. If you’re not happy with him…life is too short to go around not being happy. I saw the happy Linn yesterday. Today. That is who I want to see, always.” The last word was much softer than the rest. “I’m glad you feel secure with me. I feel I can be myself with you. Perhaps that is the greatest and only compliment we can give each other just now.”

Laura hoped that she had not hurt Linnéa’s feelings. She could tell how vulnerable she was as she watched her face, her teeth clutching at her lips, her eyes squeezed tightly shut. But Laura could not bring herself to say the words. It wasn’t that she couldn’t identify them. That was the problem, she could. She just couldn’t bring herself to admit to herself that she did. Laura couldn’t make herself vulnerable again yet, so soon. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Linnéa. For some reason, she trusted her new friend more than she had trusted Michael. But she still couldn’t afford to take that chance. She couldn’t hurt that way anymore.

Laura would try her hardest to make sure Linnéa did not hurt. She would be there for her. She would watch sad movies and eat Ben and Jerry’s with her at night and she would run with her the next morning to work it off. She would learn the words to Linnéa’s brit-pop songs and sing them to her. She would buy her silly just-because-you’re-special cards and hold her when she cried. It was her duty. It was her pleasure.

Linnéa had moved her head ever so slightly at Laura’s last words. They were, of course, not exactly what she wanted to hear, but it was all Laura had to offer at this moment. Laura removed her hands from Linnéa’s and reached for her, pulling her closer, the closest they had been together. She felt the staccato breathing, hinting that Linnéa was crying. Laura pulled her closer, her head buried in the hollow between Laura’s neck and shoulder.

“Don’t cry, sweetheart. I’ll be here for you.” Laura stroked her head gently while her other hand held Linnéa directly above the small of her back. She kissed the top of her head, little short kisses there, smelling the clean smell of her shampoo. “If you need a place to stay you can spend the night here as long as you don’t mind sharing the bed with me. All I ask in return is that you be my friend. And that you don’t make fun of my lack of domestic abilities.”

Laura heard Linnéa giggle and she squeezed her tightly. “You know what, Linnéa? I’m gonna sing for you. Usually you have either have to get me drunk or have tickets to witness this, but for you, Cherie, I’ll make an exception.” Laura scrambled up from the bed and stood in front of it, clad only in her panties and nightshirt which barely covered her thighs. She took a minute clear her throat dramatically before beginning.

“You'll never get away from me.
You can climb the tallest tree.
I'll be there somehow.

True, you could say, "Hey, here's your hat."
But a little thing like that
couldn't stop me now.

I couldn't get away from you,
even if you told me to,
so go on and try.
Just try and you're gonna see
how you're gonna not at all
get away from me.”

Her act was a bit over dramatized but it made Linnéa smile so it was worth it. “Yes, I’m a dork,” Laura said as she crawled back into bed. “That’s from Gypsy. You know, about the stripper. Mama Rose and Herbie sing that one.”

“You’re so sweet, Laura,” Linnéa said, reaching her hand to touch Laura’s. “You’re cold. Come here.” Laura scooted toward her and the two huddled together for warmth. Before long they were sleeping again.

Laura didn’t know what time it was when she awoke again. The sun had illuminated the room; a ray had fallen across Linnéa’s face. She was so precious. Her boyfriend must have been the stupidest guy on earth ever. Laura tiptoed out of the bedroom and into the kitchen where she began to brew a pot of coffee. She returned to the bedroom and nudged Linnéa gently.

“Hey sleepyhead.”

“Hi,” Linnéa said, dreamily; sleep still clouding her eyes.

“Do you want to go get something to eat? My treat?”

“Ok,” Linnéa said, closing her eyes and cuddling into the pillow.

Laura chuckled and pulled the covers off her, tickling her gently under her arms. “Get up, get up!”

“Ok, ok,” Linnéa said between giggles. “You’re awfully insistent.”

“C’mon, I’ve got to show you how to work the shower in this place,” Laura called after her as she made her way into the bathroom. “You’ve almost got to start the water five minutes before you get into the damn thing.” She turned, handing Linnéa a towel. “And don’t take too long, not for my sake, but because the hot water doesn’t last too long.”

“Thank you, Laura,” Linnéa said softly.

“We’re probably about the same size so help yourself to any of my clothes…in the closet there or the drawers. And holler if you need me.” Laura smiled and closed the door behind her.

 

[Lady_Mornington]

She was still embarressed, and if she was to be perfectly honest with herself, feeling a bit slighted. Linnéa felt like she had laid herself open to Laura, and she would have liked her to respond in kind. Still, Laura had not rejected her and the way she had responded had reinforced her initial feeling that there was more than friendship to their relation.

Wrapping herself in a towel and walking to the kitchen where Laura was standing by the stove, by the look and smell of it making scrambled eggs, singing to herself as she stirred the pot.

"Smells wonderful Laura" she moved to stand behind her and wrapping her arms around her waist, resting her head against her shoulder and continuing in a whisper "I'm sorry about the things I said. I guess I came across like a bit of a stalker."

"No you didn't sweets." Laura replied without moving. "I just wasn't prepared for it." She turned around to look at Linnéa placing her hands on her shoulders. "I know that you wanted to hear but..."

Laura bit her lip seemingly unsure how to continue and once again Linnéa felt the blush rise on her cheeks. She wanted to tell Laura that she needn't say anything but the words didn't form.

Come to my arms tonight
Just you and me together under electric light
And she will dance in the poison air
And we can stay together
Two hearts under the skyscrapers
Theres a time bomb in the high rise
Theres a blue suburban dream
Will I see you up in paradise
Or have you come to catch me?

Brett Anderson's voice on the stereo and without thinking Linnéa moved closer her lips pressed against Laura's.

It felt...different, so very different from anything she had experienced. Not the mere physical sensation rather the notion that the person personfied everything that Linnéa had thought been missing in her life.

Stepping back, unwilling to break the embrace yet with a small smile on her face as she let the towel drop to the floor.

 

[MelancholyBaby]

Laura froze as she felt Linnéa’s lips meet hers. They were firm and light. They were perfect. It was the first time Laura’s lips had met those of another woman but it seemed like the time was right. She was unsure of what to do, how to respond. She kept her hands on Linnéa’s shoulders and luxuriated in the innocent graze of their lips on each other’s. She resisted the urge to further the kiss as much as she wanted to. Laura’s body was responding but she couldn’t act on the new sensations that were racing through her veins.

Laura wouldn’t further things but she was afraid she lacked the strength to pull away. She didn’t need to. Linnéa took a step back, letting the towel drop from around her body.

“Oh my god, Linn…” was all she could manage as she struggled to keep her eyes on her friend’s face and not roam downward to gaze at her body. A smile danced on Linnéa’s lips. Her curiosity got the best of her and Laura’s eyes began to descend down her body. She was built perfectly, slender, but not bony. Her breasts were not large but beautifully shaped and firm, dark pink nipples adorning them, erect from the coolness of the room. Laura wondered briefly what they would feel like under her hands, under her lips. Her eyes continued, delighting in the flat plane of her stomach, the gentle curve of her hips. Laura felt the warmth from the stove near her back and ripped her eyes away from Linnéa, turning quickly.

“The eggs,” Laura muttered as she stirred them quickly, hoping that they had not burnt while her mind was on other things. “They’re ok,” she said finally, turning back to face Linnéa, hoping she was still there. “Linn…you’re beautiful. You really are. Inside, too. And I’m not just saying that to get into your pants.” By now Linnéa had wrapped her body in the towel again. The poor thing was probably shivering with cold. It was always freezing in the apartment but there was not much she could do about it. Laura wrapped her arms around Linnéa, pulling her closer, trying to warm her.

She was in such a difficult position right now; trying desperately not to reveal how attracted she was to Linnéa because she was afraid, yet not wanting to appear too cold or standoffish to push her away. Eventually Laura would have to make a decision. She would be brave or she wouldn’t.

“Thank you, Laura. I think you are beautiful, too.” Laura’s arms wrapped around her tighter. Michael had told her she was beautiful all the time. Laura hadn’t believed him. But she believed Linnéa.

“Thank you, you’re sweet. But not nearly as beautiful as you.” Laura backed away a bit, turning again. “I am trying not to mess these eggs up. My culinary skills are a bit lacking.” Her spatula moved gently in the pan. “I think these ones will be edible though. Hurry and get dressed before you freeze and when you get back I think they’ll be done.” Laura turned around and batted Linnéa playfully on her behind. “Go on or there won’t be any left for you!”

Linnéa laughed and hurried toward the bedroom. Laura watched her descent down the hallway, admiring her shapely legs and the way the towel would sometimes ride up a bit and expose a bit of her derriere. There was no question that Linnéa was a beautiful woman. And Laura was a very confused one.

She slid two pieces of bread in the toaster and waited for them to brown, keeping her eyes on the eggs while she waited for Linnéa’s return. She hoped her friend wouldn’t be put off by the simplicity and disorganization of Laura’s life. Linnéa just seemed so perfect and put together and polished. That just wasn’t in Laura’s nature. She didn’t know why she was so desperate for Linnéa’s affection. She knew she had it now but she wanted so much to keep it.

Laura noticed the toast pop up and as she buttered it she heard Linnéa’s footsteps down the hall. “Am I too late?”

 

[Lady_Mornington]

There was no way Linnéa could hide the blush as she returned to the kitchen. She had punched herself for acting so rashly as she did, yet there was no denying the way she felt for Laura.

Seeing Laura seated by the table, idly flicking through a magazine as she entered, and shooting her a radiant smile as she sat down opposite from her. "You'll love the eggs, I've outdone myself this time." The smile and small laughter so infectious and making Linnéa's heart skip a beat.

Helping herself to a serving, hearing Laura coo for praise of her culinary skills, knowing she would have to address the issue of the kiss sooner or later.

"Look Laura, I'm sorry about..."

She felt the blush colouring her cheeks yet again, it felt thoroughly awkward.

"It was foolish of me to assume that you would feel the same and I..."

Linnéa was interrupted as Laura got up and moved to kneel in front of her. Taking her hands in hers and giving her a squeeze.

"Don't apologize Linn. Don't ever apologize."

She looked at her as she spoke, their fingers entwined.

"Let's just see what happens shall we. No promises at this point."

She got up and with a second's hesitation she leaned forward kissing her.

 

[MelancholyBaby]

The kiss had evolved from the first one. It was not as chaste, more exploratory, still perfect. Laura’s lips were soft on her friend’s, opening slightly, gently sucking Linnéa‘s bottom lip between her own. Laura could feel the soft whimper that she had drew from her new friend, it urged her to continue. Still, Laura’s head was spinning and she was a bit shaken by the desire that Linnéa had aroused in herself. She broke the kiss and moved her head away slowly.

“You didn’t have to stop.” Linnéa‘s voice was soft, a request and an answer at the same time. Her eyes searched Laura’s and she could see the beginnings of desire that had developed in them.

“I know, Linn. This is just all really new to me. I have never kissed a girl before you and I’m just trying to figure this all out.” Laura sat back down, her eyes lowering onto the bit of eggs and toast left on her plate. She had no plans on finishing breakfast. It would remove the taste of Linnéa from her lips.

“Me either.” The simple exchange was augmented by all of the things the two had not verbalized. Laura should have told Linnéa how she had never had feelings like this for another person before but she could hardly admit that it was true to herself, let alone tell Linnéa how she was feeling. How was it so easy for Linnéa to be so honest, to put herself out there? To be rejected or accepted but to not know what was going to be the result. Laura was not as brave.

“Do you have anything you need to do today, Linn?” Laura stood up, picking up her plate and carrying it to the sink. “As much as I enjoy your company I don’t want to interfere with your life. I don’t have much of one right now, but eventually I’ll have to get a job and will have to do the work thing.” She walked back over to the table, taking Linnéa’s offered plate and returning to the sink before finally sitting down at the table. “Oh…and that outfit you picked looks adorable on you. Of course, I think anything would. Not that you would need to wear something to be adorable. Not that I looked. I mean…” A blush colored Laura’s face heavily. Linnéa could only reply with laughter.

 

[Lady_Mornington]

"Tell you what Laura, if you don't have anything planned for the rest of the weekend I have an excellent idea."

Linnéa smiled shyly. She desperately wanted to spend more time with Laura and further she felt that she needed to get away from the empty apartment that was the only thing she had to go back to. Laura gave her one of the familiar stares, her head tilted slightly to the side and the eyes expressing both interest and just a hint of pleased surprise.

"No I haven't got anything planned Linn, but don't expect me to go skydiving or something like that."

"I promise, just something relaxing, no dress-code either."

Linnéa left Laura to clear away their breakfast, calling her mum on her mobile. Her parents owned a beachhouse a few miles north, and they were usually more than ready to let her use it whenever it took her fancy. This time proved no exception. Linnéa saw no point in divulging whom she was inviting and mum didn't ask, probably assuming that it would be Christian. Arranging to meet up later to get the keys and to pick up her mum's car, seeing as she didn't own one herself. She found Laura seated by the table, sipping from an enormous mug of coffee.

"So what have you concocted now Linn?" Laura looked up and smiled at her as Linnéa took a seat next to her and shyly took her hand.

"Oh nothing special, just a weekend by the beach. Roasting marshmallows on the open fire and watching the sunset from the patio."

She gave Laura's hand a squeeze as she continued "You can bring your pink gown and pretend to be a rich heiress like the ones in your old films. You know having Martinis for breakfast and wearing diamond necklaces."

"And who would you be then?" Laura smiled mischeviously as she squeezed her hand.

"The mistreated maid? No I'll be your equally glamorous friend who shares the Martinis and commiserate that it was indeed better in the past. Now go pack sweetie and I'll meet you outside the flat in an hour or so. I got to pick up the car and say hi to mum."

She leaned forward to kiss Laura on the cheek, savouring the sensation of her skin against her lips.

 

[MelancholyBaby]

Laura’s lips seemed curved into a permanent smile as she thought of the invitation, spending the weekend with Linnéa, being somewhere new and enjoying the beginning of their relationship. She couldn’t remember a time when she had met a woman who she had been so comfortable around. She wanted to kiss Linnéa, to take her lips away from her cheek and place them on her lips but she resisted. She didn’t want the drive to the beach house to be awkward. Laura wanted to make sure of her feelings completely before complicating a friendship in its infancy.

“Alright, I’ll be ready in an hour. And…thank you.”

She watched as Linnéa made her way out, closing the door behind her. Laura hadn’t been on a trip in forever, she didn’t know the first thing about packing. It was a good thing she didn’t have very many things. She went through her day, replaying in her head what she used on a typical day. Toothpaste, hairbrush, panties, socks…she moved from her bathroom to her bedroom collecting everything. She gazed at a pale pink dress that hung in her closet. She remembered Linnéa’s words… “You can bring your pink gown…” It was going with her. Hopefully her new friend would remember her gown as well.

Laura felt herself grow increasingly nervous as the minutes passed. Finally alone she could level with herself. She was bisexual. She had to be. She was feeling things for Linnéa that in the past she had only felt for men. Ok, so that had been established. As to what to do about it, she wasn’t sure. She still wasn’t comfortable trusting anyone. Yet Linnéa seemed like she would be careful with her heart. But her new friend had Christian…

She would keep it light and friendly. If something happened it would happen. Laura couldn’t help but think that Linnéa returned had similar feelings. Confident she had packed everything she would need she stacked up the few items near the door, placing the pink gown in a garment bag. She remembered her bathing suit at the last minute and while she rummaged for it she found an oversize pair of sunglasses. These would need to come, too. She put them on and, looking at the clock, realized that Linnéa would be waiting for her downstairs. She carefully maneuvered herself and her luggage down the stairs. Laura wasn’t sure what kind of car her friend would be driving. She perched herself on her suitcase and watched as cars and people made their way down along the street. She finally saw Linnéa. She got up quickly and moved toward, kissing one cheek and then the other.

“Hell-o dahling, it has been too too long since I’ve seen you! How haaave you been?” Laura giggled and her eyes twinkled below the sunglasses as she embraced her friend, excited to get to know her better.

 

[Lady_Mornington]

Linnéa felt like the subway was going at snail's pace. Sitting by the window of the grubby car as the stations flashed by her eyes. She had phoned ahead to her father, asking to lend the beach house and the car for the weekend, but not giving any closer information as to whom she'd be taking, or even that she was going there with someone. Her parents were good in that way, never really asking her about her private life if she didn't invite them to do so.

Telling her father that she would most probably just try and get some writing done and that the relative quiet by the sea would be condusive to her research. She almost blushed when he bestowed her an all-too knowing glance but refrained from making any comments about it. Giving her a kiss on the cheek as she got into the driver's seat of the SAAB and pulling away from the house.

God there was so many things that needed attending, getting her clothes, something suitable for every possible occasion, and picking up some wine as well as vermouth and vodka. They were going to have Dry Martini's after all.

The traffic seemed to be more dense than ever, and more times than one she found herself swearing at other drivers. Nerves taking their toll on her as she finally managed to find an empty spot to park the car in, only a few minutes walk from her own flat. She packed in a hurry, forgoing to place her clothes with the usual delicacy she usually employed and more or less throwing them into her bag. Getting some of her favourite cd:s and deposing them in the bag before hurrying down and getting back behind the wheel. God Laura was probably wondering where she had gone.

It was not with little guilt that she finally pulled up outside Laura's flat, finding her sitting on her bag outside the gate displaying her usual self-assured manner. Like there was nothing out of the ordinary sitting on her suitcase with a pair of slightly too big sunglasses on. It made Linnéa's heart beat faster as she pulled up and got out to receive the greeting, the lingering feeling of Laura's lips on her cheek making her blush.

"Oh I'm so sorry Sweetie but you know traffic was a right terror." She giggled as she helped Laura put her bag in the back and with the grace and dignity that would have made most royals green with envy got inside the car.

"We need to get some wine and food but I guess we could stop outside of town or what do you think?" reaching over to take Laura's hand as they reached the freeway. "God I'm so nervous about all this, you'll tell me if I start going nuts OK?" She smiled at Laura as she felt her friend squeezing her hand. And adding in a softer tone "I'm so glad you came"

 

[MelancholyBaby]

"I'm so glad you invited me." Laura smiled, the corners of her mouth darting up more eagerly than she wished them to. Perhaps Linnéa, her eyes more or less glued to the road, wouldn't notice the overeagerness that seemed to accompany every movement Laura made. "I'm very excited." She looked down, feeling her connection with Linnéa deepen as their hands remained together, their fingers interweaving. There was a new dimension added just then as she was able to see their closeness and not just feel it.

"I'm so glad you're driving. I'm a terrible driver. Too cautious. Afraid of crossing traffic; left turns, pedestrians...I always think I am going to hit them. Since I'm not really good at driving in the city I don't have a car. I miss it sometimes, but not very often." Laura looked over at Linnéa, her eyes tracing her friend's profile, committing the curve of her nose and the silhouette of her eyelashes to memory. As her eyes continued to her lips Laura felt a near overwhelming urge to kiss the softness she saw there. She moved her eyes away, thankful that Linnéa would not be able to see them hidden behind her oversized sunglasses.

She closed her eyes and let herself settle into the seat. It was almost as if she didn't need to really say anything just now at all, that whatever Laura had to say to Linnéa flowed out of her from the connection of their hands. She felt enveloped, a warm blanket of comfort seemed to wrap around her chilly soul. Laura knew that at this moment she was exactly where she needed to be. She could only hope that Linnéa felt the same way, although that was a lot to hope for.

"How much longer is it, darling," she murmurred, Laura's head moving lazily in Linnéa's direction.

 

[Lady_Mornington]

Smiling as she felt Laura's gaze on her as well as the touch of her hand on hers. There was something liberating about the way Laura could make a drama of the most mundane of conversations, and Linnéa could easily see her girlfriend taking the stage with any of the icons of yesteryear. Yes there was something distinctly Hepburn-esque about Laura and even though Linnéa had never been an afficionado of the films from that particular era, she did see the resemblance.

"It's not too far Sweets, but we need to stop to stock up on supplies. Can't have two fine ladies such as ourselves eating like peasants."

Blushing as she had spoken, the mock-haughtiness didn't come easy to her, but she received a smile in return for her less than sterling efforts.

"Sometimes I feel really stupid when being with you Laura-" She kept her eyes on the road as she spoke next "I mean you are really savvy and street smart and I'm practically the geek." She smiled self-depreciatory as she headed down one of the ramps leading of the freeway.

Almost immediately the scenery changed, the outskirts of the city long passed and replaced by the soft rolling hills and the hint of ocean at the horizon. Turning again to Laura and reaching for her hand.

"I know I sound silly and probably coming across as being off my rocker but I don't quite know what I would do if you hadn't come with me." She gave her friend's , no her girlfriend's, hand another squeeze before pulling up on the parking lot of a small store.

"Well my dear I fear that we will have to mingle with the commoners today, it's my maid's day off and all" Smiling again as she got out of the car and on a whim walked around to hold the door open for Laura.

 

[MelancholyBaby]

Laura took Linnéa's outstretched hand and stepped gingerly from the car. She hadn't had a car door held open for her in such a very long time. It was chivalrous, but a little odd coming from another woman. Still it was a charming act, and the sort of offbeat and cute thing that she knew she would come to expect from her new friend. "Thank you, sweetie," she whispered, kissing Linnéa softly on the cheek.

"I suppose we will have to cook. I mean, you will have to cook. That is if you want to have something edible." She giggled as the two of them hurried into the store. "I will help you with anything that doesn't involve heat or sharp objects." The store was small, a middle-aged woman looked up as the two women entered the store. She nodded slightly to acknowledge them before looking down at the newspaper she was reading.

Laura wondered what the two of them would look like to others. Did it matter? If she was deliriously happy then what would disapproving whispers or stares do to break the trance-like spell of a new love? She didn’t know. Everyone had always approved of her choices before. ‘He’s a nice boy,’ they would say or, her father’s personal favorite, ‘He’s got a good head on his shoulders.’ Laura was sure Linnéa had a good head on her shoulders except she was a she instead of a he.

She blinked, finally realizing that she had been staring intently at a box of egg noodles before Laura turned to find Linnéa browsing the wine and liqueur. She walked a few paces to join her, resting her head on Linnéa’s shoulder. “So,” she said, her voice dripping with mock haughtiness, “What do you think we should add to our wine cellar?”

 

[Lady_Mornington]

Only listening in with half an ear as Laura went on about cooking, or her own self-professed lack of culinary skills. Truth to the matter Linnéa was still savouring the small sign of affection that Laura had bestowed on her. It was not the first relation she had entered into, and by now the word relation seemed to be the appropriate term, but she couldn't recall when last she had been so thoroughly taken by another person. In comparison to Christian, and God knew that she must face up to that, there was a vitality about Laura that was infectious. Always a well-placed word or a just a raised eyebrow at the ways that the world behaved. To Linn's mind Laura was the epitomy of all the traits she herself lacked. Laura was sassy, she knew how to behave with people and she never seemed to care what any other person might say or think.

"Sure, I'll cook" she mumbled the reply as she contemplated the menu for the coming weekend. There was a certain appeal in cooking for someone who took such an obvious pleasure in the food, as well as the fact that it was being served for her. Smiling as Laura returned to her side and delivered the question regarding wine in much the same mock-haughty tone that Linn had come to associate with her.

"Oh I don't know, a few bottles of red, one or two white and a lot of booze" She nodded as if she was imparting some delicate secret. Stacking up the shopping basket that Laura had taken from her hands with the food as welll as the wines before heading to the check-out and paying using one of Christian's credit cards. "He can as well pay for some of my pleasures as well" she found herself thinking as she helped Laura pack the groceries and lugging them back to the car.

"There's only a short drive now, and if the weather holds we might just go for a walk on the beach to work up an appetite" She looked across at Laura and once again reached out to take her hand. "And then we'll have something nice to eat and sit on the patio and look at the sunset." Giving Laura's hand yet another squeeze.