The wonder of it all. ( Put on your thinking caps, folks)!!!

[FlamingoBlue]

At some point in our lives we discover that we are sexual beings interested in discovering more about the subject of sex. So, how do we learn? Not by taking classes, at least not in the U.S. So, what do we do to become more knowledgable? We ask our peers who know little more than we do. Parents, for the most part are unwilling to frankly discuss the topic when we are at an age to learn.

Where are the schools that teach courses on sexual intercourse? How do we get the information to become great lovers?

I think that God must have a great sense of humor. We, males and females, are born with body parts that arouse our feelings. If we touch them and experience those feelings, we look forward to doing it again. And then we learn that it feels even better when it involves someone else, too, who we can touch and who touches us . Then we find out that "society" has placed limits on sexual touching.

As we get older and begin to understand the "rules" we are still confused by the yin and yang of sex. So, what to do??

Any suggestions as to how we might make sex an easier topic to understand? Is the next generation doomed to live in the dark as many of us did??

blue

 

[SimplySouthern]

I, for one, would have found sex not only a more enjoyable topic to discuss but also to research if it didn't have such a "stigma" attached to it. Many people have this sex-is-wrong attitude and leave me feeling insecure about my own sexuality after talking with them.

If talking about sex and having your questions answered were a little more accepted, I think that people would ask more questions and share more information, and thus, learn more.

As far as that goes, I am afraid it is nothing more than a pipe dream, so I won't hold my breath until it happens.

 

[Expertise]

Do a Columbus

Research as many texts as possible, gather intelligece from reliable sources, figure out the logistics then set off for the undiscovered country.

The analogy works but please make sure you can differentiate between the orient and the caribean... it could save some embarassment

 

[Passionnee]

Whoa so many questions, I could spend the whole day writing Blue.

As for the next generation, I am scared a bit, with all the medias, internet. Some kids are learning stuff about sex real young, and not sure they are learning it the right away. As a chat monitor here, I would catch at least 4-5 kids per day, average age 14, playing in the family room. For those who don't go to chat,the family room consist of incest mainly.

So those 14 years old go learn stuff, from men and women around 40 and up. That's scary. Let's just say that some are real perverts. IMHO some may be learning to fast the wrong way.

I don't know if it's the same in the states, but here in Quebec, they start to do sex ed at an earlier age, around 12, when for me it was around 16.

Will stop could go for hours...

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

I detest "sexual stigma!" Fuck everybody!

I mean what is relay wrong - with feeling good? Somebody please give me a logical answer.

Before the advent of AIDS and disregarding the obvious - other longstanding/traditional sexually transmitted diseases, non-consensual sex, sex with children, unwanted pregnancy and other possibly physically and emotionally abusive and painful things - "some but relatively few" perverts align themselves with........

Nothing is wrong with sex. Group sex, single sex, married sex, non-married sex, sex with toys, sex with boys, sex with girls - any thing you can imagine.....

I know it - it's all okay - it all feels good.

What real harm could it do it every adult, every adult who wanted to, hell, every adult who didn't want to - right now - whipped down their pants, pulled up their dresses and fondled, fooled around with, stuck it to, or simply watched - each other have some form of sex? Some form of fun? What real harm would that do?

(Well, maybe a few heart attacks is all.)

But to the contrary - I think the world would be a far, far better place. At the very least - we'd all see each other's secret package.

I say that there's nothing wrong with any of it, other than some folks can't/won't ever feel these pleasures because they are stigmatized via some mentally handed down tradition that has long ago seen it's day.

Fuck everybody! That's my motto and I know, I know - the world would be better off for it.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

PS - as far as "those kids" learning stuff.....

Ya know - it all depends - on "what" they learn. And hey - that's up to the teachers and parents. If "those kids" are learning "the wrong stuff" it's our fault.

 

[Juliangel]

It will start with parents who decide their children are worth the discomfort if talks.

Note I said talks and not the talk. It should be done in stages, I started when each of my boys turned 8 with discussions about respecting their bodies and holding girls hands. Also the understanding that one day she may want to hold your hand and the next she may say no and that no means no.

My older son is now 11 and I have discussed kissing with him and even though I am not ready for it this summer we have to start the basic sex talks because he is going into middle school and I know they talk about it there. I would rather have him learn it from us than from the kids Passionnee was talking about.

I have told them that masterbation is normal just not to be done in the livingroom in front of everyone(yes this was a problem during baseball season) The mood would hit but hte desire to not miss the game would take over, that is kind of difficult for mom to deal with.

I also know my missing Victoria Secret catalogs are under my sons mattress but he does not know that I know where they are.

 

[FlamingoBlue]

Thank goodness for Sparky....

Fuck everyone, huh. I tried that once and it just didn't work out.

blue

 

[Passionnee]

Re: PS - as far as

Ya know - it all depends - on "what" they learn. And hey - that's up to the teachers and parents. If "those kids" are learning "the wrong stuff" it's our fault.

Don't get me wrong, I think it's awesome they change it to 12 instead. And I know my generation is more cool about talking about sex to their kids then my folks were with me. I would love to be the one doing the sex ed to my kids. NOT some pervert on a chat line.. That's what I meant.

 

[Sparky Kronkite]

Yes I'm with you passion....

The scariness of our children learning from other uncontrolled sources of information - and no other source - is great.

That's why I think parents and teachers should tactically strike and strike early - with a balanced sexualy education. Before the perves get to them.

And ya know - then, if the perves do get to them - they've got some base line of info - a base line of what might be wrong, of what is wrong.

I'd rather mold my clay first - before someone else does.

 

[Never]

That which was now is not.


[Edited by Never on 01-11-2001 at 11:34 PM]

 

[Andra_Jenny]

I am not pointing fingers or placing blame and do not want to sound too old, but today's entertainment ain't "Leave it to Beaver," but even then my siblings, neighbors and I all experimented with sex from 11 or 12, and some of the girls especially even younger because they wanted to keep up and do what we were doing. My first ideas of sex came about in dreams. I would then act them out and they felt good.

 

[Skitten]

It is true that there is not enough education about sex taught in schools. That is why it is our job as parents to do it. And not waiting until you find out, you start talking to them early as early as you feel they will understand. And for the younger ones try not going into to much detail. If you talk to them now and they know that you are willing to discuss it with them, I believe that they will come back to you when they have questions.

I think the reason people don't like to talk about it is because they are scared. Scared of what their kids might do if you openly discuss it. My feelings are if you discuss it, and don't get upset when they tell you something that is going on sexually with them. They will be more willing to come to you than they would have been if you never brought the subject up. And it is very important that we do because it is more serious now. There are more STD's than when we were their age and if we don't educate them they will learn either the hard way of from some pervert who just want to hurt them.

 

[FlamingoBlue]

This one got buried, too.

blue