The Stupor Bowl

[Freya]

Ok, so I'm going to watch it on Sunday with the new guy and some other friends. I don't want to look like a complete nincompoop, but I know nothing about football, and frankly care even less than that. Who should I cheer for and why?

 

[lilminx]

Ican't help you, hon. I don't even know who's playing.

 

[Guest]

Not Raders. The other one.

 

[clit_licker30]

Just drink and eat a lot, then when your friend makes a gesture, copy him.

For a primer, watch the channel that replays all the past Super Bowls this week. It is one of the ESPN channels.

It might be a good idea to find out who your friend is betting on or pull for. Go spend $50 on a jersey of the Bucs or Raiders.

 

[mbb308]

Silver and Black

Reasons to root for the Raiders:

1) I will be, for what it's worth.

2) They will win.

3) Their old vets will swing the balance of the game in their favor by virtue of their experience.

4) Tampa deserves to loose because they jacked the Raiders' former coach.

5) Tampa's just happy to be in the game - they've already won as much as they thought they could by beating Philly in the cold last week.

 

[plasticman33]

Read my av!!

 

[Freya]

Just drink and eat a lot, then when your friend makes a gesture, copy him.

For a primer, watch the channel that replays all the past Super Bowls this week. It is one of the ESPN channels.

It might be a good idea to find out who your friend is betting on or pull for. Go spend $50 on a jersey of the Bucs or Raiders.

Well, surprisingly enough, I like to be difficult, and so had planned on cheering for the opposite team as him, but I need intelligent comments I can make so I actually look like I know what I'm talking about, instead of just being a general pain in the arse.


*writing down Mbb's notes for later*

 

[plasticman33]

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers have Gruden, he was Oaklands coach last year and has turned the Bucs around this year. He knows the strenghs and weaknesses of the Raiders better than anyone. He'll design plays to exploit them.

Tampa has a questionable offensive line, but held their own against the Eagles last week. Their defense is one of the best in the NFL.

Although Oakland is favored to win, I still predict the Buccaneers by two touchdowns!

 

[Problem Child]

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers have Gruden, he was Oaklands coach last year and has turned the Bucs around this year. He knows the strenghs and weaknesses of the Raiders better than anyone. He'll design plays to exploit them.

Tampa has a questionable offensive line, but held their own against the Eagles last week. Their defense is one of the best in the NFL.

Although Oakland is favored to win, I still predict the Buccaneers by two touchdowns!

Plasticman picked the Jets in a blowout.

He's also advising buy heavy in Enron, Worldcom, East German defense industry stocks.

 

[plasticman33]

Plasticman picked the Jets in a blowout.

He's also advising buy heavy in Enron, Worldcom, East German defense industry stocks.

LMAO! You're just upset because you followed my advice!

 

[Lancecastor]

Say "shotgun" a lot when the ball is snapped and you'll do fine....most Canadian guys haven't got a fucking clue about football anyway.

Watch their beers and get new ones quietly without being asked.

Cook something that can be prepared quietly and eaten without napkins, utensils or plates.

Be aware in advance of whatever TittyGrrl will be on the halftime show and which new beer, car and music commercials are going to premiere.

That's all you need.

Lance

 

[clit_licker30]

If you truly don't know anything about football, you are going to have to cram.

You can start here: http://sportingnews.com/

 

[Freya]

Say "shotgun" a lot when the ball is snapped and you'll do fine....most Canadian guys haven't got a fucking clue about football anyway.

Watch their beers and get new ones quietly without being asked.

Cook something that can be prepared quietly and eaten without napkins, utensils or plates.

Be aware in advance of whatever TittyGrrl will be on the halftime show and which new beer, car and music commercials are going to premiere.

That's all you need.

Lance

Jesus Lance - I'm not his friggin wife. Cook? Get beers? *snort*

LOL! Besides, we're going to a legion hall to watch it, so none of that would be necessary. Why would I say shotgun?

Isn't Shania singing in the stupor bowl this year?

CL - I'm not really interested enough to actually study up on it. I just wanted something more intelligent to say than "Wow, I do like it when they pat each other's asses".

 

[clit_licker30]

CL - I'm not really interested enough to actually study up on it. I just wanted something more intelligent to say than "Wow, I do like it when they pat each other's asses".

They don't pat on the ass anymore. You are really a lost
cause.

And "shotgun" is a formation when the qb takes the snap without being under the center. The qb is generally 5 yds behind the center when the ball is snapped. Most of the time when a team is in the "shotgun" it is a passing down.

The defense likes to "blitz" on downs that the offense is in the "shotgun". Sometimes the defense will blitz while being in their "nickle" package. But the defense will probably be in "man" coverage when that happens.

See how easy this is going to be?

 

[Freya]

They don't pat on the ass anymore. You are really a lost
cause.

And "shotgun" is a formation when the qb takes the snap without being under the center. The qb is generally 5 yds behind the center when the ball is snapped. Most of the time when a team is in the "shotgun" it is a passing down.

The defense likes to "blitz" on downs that the offense is in the "shotgun". Sometimes the defense will blitz while being in their "nickle" package. But the defense will probably be in "man" coverage when that happens.

See how easy this is going to be?

I think I'll just get drunk, and play darts or pool instead. Blech!


Why don't they pat each other on the ass anymore? I know that they aren't allowed to do those funky dances when they get a touchdown.

 

[clit_licker30]

I think I'll just get drunk, and play darts or pool instead. Blech!


Why don't they pat each other on the ass anymore? I know that they aren't allowed to do those funky dances when they get a touchdown.

LOL

I don't know. I just haven't noticed it in quite awhile. The good news nobody will remember much after the game anyway.

Have fun!

 

[caligula]

Hey I like both teams, just remember to say that Tampa has the best defense and Oakland has the best offense. Smile alot and be sexy, the guys will give a damn about your football knowledge, hah!

 

[Rubyfruit]

Smile alot and be sexy, the guys will give a damn about your football knowledge, hah!

This has always been my experience as well.

And make sure to get him a cold one whenever he needs it.

And food.

Suck him off in the upstairs bathroom during half time.

Have fun!

 

[RosevilleCAguy]

Ok, so I'm going to watch it on Sunday with the new guy and some other friends. I don't want to look like a complete nincompoop, but I know nothing about football, and frankly care even less than that. Who should I cheer for and why?

The Raiders are the good guys and my team from childhood.

Think of them as the Redwings of Yank Football.

The Buccaneers are evil. Rumor has it that Roy roots for them.

 

[Freya]

This has always been my experience as well.

And make sure to get him a cold one whenever he needs it.

And food.

Suck him off in the upstairs bathroom during half time.

Have fun!

Jeez Rubes, you and Lance need to get married - you'd be a perfect pair.

Cooking and serving beer to my man like a good little wifey-poo isn't really my style. Now the sucking off in the bathroom I did already consider.


Hey Yank - why do I think you're playing reverse psychology with me? You wouldn't do something like that, now would you?

 

[Guest]

 

[Freya]

Forget the game.... just make it back for all the commercials

Ok. Why?

 

[Guest]

 

[Freya]

They're the best part.....

Well, unless there's some good broken bones, where the leg bends in on itself and flops all over the place. That would beat the commercials even.

 

[RosevilleCAguy]

Hey Yank - why do I think you're playing reverse psychology with me? You wouldn't do something like that, now would you?

Not moi. I'm about as subtle as a sledge hammer. A 20 pounder at that.

Go Raiders.