S
Strangebuddy
Guest
"Motivation. That's the key to everything. Whether you're working on vertical integration, gaining the trust of shareholders, or even just trying to get your employees to do their job, knowing what motivates you and the people you work with is the key to successful management."
Jake scanned his audience, a few dozen of the nation's brightest high school students. Most were paying rapt attention to him, though not for the reasons he wished. Most of the brats in front of him were hoping to score a scholarship or even one of his company's youth scholar internships...they were too busy preparing to shake his hand and ask their pre-planned questions while dropping their names until they started to sound like political adverts.
"If you know what someone wants, if you know what gets them up in the morning and what they want to do with their paycheck, you can get them to move mountains. All you have to do is tie it back to their work and how doing what you want will benefit them in pursuing that motivation."
Jake stepped out from the podium, letting his 6'3 frame be fully revealed to the students, a few of whom blushed as he shot a bleached smile at them and stretched his toned arms, whose muscles were barely concealed under the sleeves of his $10,000 suit.
"For example..."
"Oh shit!" A mousy voice suddenly squeaked out.
Jake stopped to find the source of the squeal and saw a corpulent young woman reaching fruitlessly for a pen she had just dropped, which bounced and rolled down the stadium seating, until it rolled in front of Stargaze's youngest CEO, who smartly stepped on it to stop it's path.
"Excuse me, dear, would you mind coming down here?"
The girl's eyes couldn't have possibly been wider as she stammered out her answer.
"I-I."
Jake sighed, "Come on, use those things that got you in the door to come down here."
"What?"
"You know, legs?"
The girl's face went beet red, and she bolted down the stairs to the laughs of her peers. She stepped up to Jake and nervously reached out for her pen, which Jake handed back with a sly smile on his face. The girl looked ready to cry and she kept her eyes focused on the ground, as though she might stare a deep enough hole into the floor that she could crawl in there and hide from the jeering.
"So Kassie, what would you say your motivation is right now?"
"I-wait, you know my name?" The girl forced back a wave of snot and tears and looked up at Jake, "I guess...it's to get back to my seat."
Jake let out a polite chuckle, which all of the brown-nosers copied, "that's more of a short-term goal but if it's all right, I'll tell your "colleagues."
He cleared his throat and motioned for the girl to take a seat at the table, next to a middle-aged woman who smiled warmly behind her black dress.
"You see Kassie's motivation is to be a leading force in the pursuit of protein synthesis, one of the pillars of the StarGaze's pharmaceutical business model."
"But isn't this a management conference?" a voice came from the crowd, jeering.
Jake shot a look which silenced the speaker immediately, "Yes...but let me explain for her." He crossed over to Kassie, who was practically devouring her bottom lip as she nibbled on it, "Companies like StarGaze throw out internships and opportunities for business majors and people interested in becoming business majors like they're tootsie rolls at a parade but we fail to promote or even encourage potential scientists until they've already graduated...and that's a mistake."
He then did something no one expected. The CEO knelt in front of the high schooler and bowed his head, "I'm sorry. That ends today."
He then took the girl's hand in his, "I read your paper and it's brilliant. We'll have to work on its cost-effectiveness of course and work on the distribution and resource allocation but your theoretical device is feasible and I'd love for you to work with us on developing it."
"Thank you" The girl said, beaming, "I thought nobody was reading it."
"Only dumbasses aren't. I always read through the fringe science papers in hopes of finding something interesting and your work is revolutionary. I was wondering though, have you considered using an amniotic evaporator to improve absorption?"
The girl smiled, "I actually was just thinking about it last night. I also thought of a new gel based growth area to speed up production."
"That's incredible!" Jake crowed, his enhusiasm growing, "Now, what about the issue you noted about.."
"Umm, what's going on?" A boy said, standing up.
Jake sighed, "short version: the only reason I bothered doing this panel was because I knew Kassie would be here. I knew none of you were really paying attention and just wanted to kiss my ass so I would invite you to one of our internships. Kassie, who I might add worked her ass off to learn enough about business management in just a few months to get selected, was here so she could present her paper to me personally, since she hadn't gotten any response. Now unless any of you have any information on how to safely produce specific chain sequences on anywhere near the scale Kassie her e is proposing, you can piss off."
#######
"Piss off?" The woman from the panel said, after Jake had finished talking to Kassie an bid her goodbye, "That'll tick some people off."
Jake shrugged and ran his fingers through his sandy-blonde hair, "Fuck em. I played nice with the other groups because they had some drive...those fuckers had silver spoons wedged so far up their ass that I'm surprised they didn't die of metal toxicity. Besides, I know their type. They wanted me to humiliate that poor girl and probably were doing so before I even came in the room."
"Personal experience?" The woman said, smoothing her dress out. She giggled at his frown, "no need to answer, you've told me stories about the "mega douchebags," and the "Ultra-bitches" you had to deal with."
Jake sighed, "Not 'bitches'...bitch. I don't even think those little bastards are that bad."
"I don't know, it sounds like you're exagerrating whenever you tell me about...Jess was it?"
Jake turned to her, "She was a monster, Jan." He began to visually shake in anger as he remembered a long series of abuse, "If I ever even saw her again, I don't know what I'd do."
Jan smiled and reached into her purse, withdrawing her smart phone. She unlocked it and put the screen up to Jake's face, "Well, then, let's find out, shall we?"
Jake looked at the scanned paper, which was a CV for one Jess Knightley. At first, Jake didn't want to believe it but all of the details matched. She had even included the honors award that only their high school gave out.
Jan watched her boss with a look of fascination, her answer ready for for his obvious yet unspoken question.
"I added an algorithm to the selection process which would hotline an applicant if she shared a common background with any member of management...you know, to weed out people who were "old friends" or family members. If you like, I can send her rejection letter on some stationary that has the words "fuck you" around its borders."
Jake didn't say anything for a while, just letting his thoughts merge, "No, is it an important job? Is she qualified for it?"
Jan shot back a wary look, "It's a lower mid-level job in our investments and Acquisitions department, not essential but it does offer the opportunity to advance in a few years. Like most of the applicants, I'd argue she's actually overqualified...though it's pretty clear she's desperate for it, based on the sweat that was all over the corners of her CV, then again, our New York Office is where she applied. If she's jobless in NYC, she's pretty much screwed without this."
"Tell you what, have her come in for an interview on Friday, 9'oclock...no wait, have her meet us at the penthouse office on 11th, I think we should make her interview memorable, don't you?
"Memorable?" Jan said, her tongue moving over her bottom lip, "this wouldn't be like that time we made those embezzling secretaries have a memorable...disciplinary staffing, would it?"
"Oh no." Jake said, smiling fiendishly, his dark green eyes igniting with thoughts of what Friday would bring, "this will be much more prolonged...and severe."
Jake scanned his audience, a few dozen of the nation's brightest high school students. Most were paying rapt attention to him, though not for the reasons he wished. Most of the brats in front of him were hoping to score a scholarship or even one of his company's youth scholar internships...they were too busy preparing to shake his hand and ask their pre-planned questions while dropping their names until they started to sound like political adverts.
"If you know what someone wants, if you know what gets them up in the morning and what they want to do with their paycheck, you can get them to move mountains. All you have to do is tie it back to their work and how doing what you want will benefit them in pursuing that motivation."
Jake stepped out from the podium, letting his 6'3 frame be fully revealed to the students, a few of whom blushed as he shot a bleached smile at them and stretched his toned arms, whose muscles were barely concealed under the sleeves of his $10,000 suit.
"For example..."
"Oh shit!" A mousy voice suddenly squeaked out.
Jake stopped to find the source of the squeal and saw a corpulent young woman reaching fruitlessly for a pen she had just dropped, which bounced and rolled down the stadium seating, until it rolled in front of Stargaze's youngest CEO, who smartly stepped on it to stop it's path.
"Excuse me, dear, would you mind coming down here?"
The girl's eyes couldn't have possibly been wider as she stammered out her answer.
"I-I."
Jake sighed, "Come on, use those things that got you in the door to come down here."
"What?"
"You know, legs?"
The girl's face went beet red, and she bolted down the stairs to the laughs of her peers. She stepped up to Jake and nervously reached out for her pen, which Jake handed back with a sly smile on his face. The girl looked ready to cry and she kept her eyes focused on the ground, as though she might stare a deep enough hole into the floor that she could crawl in there and hide from the jeering.
"So Kassie, what would you say your motivation is right now?"
"I-wait, you know my name?" The girl forced back a wave of snot and tears and looked up at Jake, "I guess...it's to get back to my seat."
Jake let out a polite chuckle, which all of the brown-nosers copied, "that's more of a short-term goal but if it's all right, I'll tell your "colleagues."
He cleared his throat and motioned for the girl to take a seat at the table, next to a middle-aged woman who smiled warmly behind her black dress.
"You see Kassie's motivation is to be a leading force in the pursuit of protein synthesis, one of the pillars of the StarGaze's pharmaceutical business model."
"But isn't this a management conference?" a voice came from the crowd, jeering.
Jake shot a look which silenced the speaker immediately, "Yes...but let me explain for her." He crossed over to Kassie, who was practically devouring her bottom lip as she nibbled on it, "Companies like StarGaze throw out internships and opportunities for business majors and people interested in becoming business majors like they're tootsie rolls at a parade but we fail to promote or even encourage potential scientists until they've already graduated...and that's a mistake."
He then did something no one expected. The CEO knelt in front of the high schooler and bowed his head, "I'm sorry. That ends today."
He then took the girl's hand in his, "I read your paper and it's brilliant. We'll have to work on its cost-effectiveness of course and work on the distribution and resource allocation but your theoretical device is feasible and I'd love for you to work with us on developing it."
"Thank you" The girl said, beaming, "I thought nobody was reading it."
"Only dumbasses aren't. I always read through the fringe science papers in hopes of finding something interesting and your work is revolutionary. I was wondering though, have you considered using an amniotic evaporator to improve absorption?"
The girl smiled, "I actually was just thinking about it last night. I also thought of a new gel based growth area to speed up production."
"That's incredible!" Jake crowed, his enhusiasm growing, "Now, what about the issue you noted about.."
"Umm, what's going on?" A boy said, standing up.
Jake sighed, "short version: the only reason I bothered doing this panel was because I knew Kassie would be here. I knew none of you were really paying attention and just wanted to kiss my ass so I would invite you to one of our internships. Kassie, who I might add worked her ass off to learn enough about business management in just a few months to get selected, was here so she could present her paper to me personally, since she hadn't gotten any response. Now unless any of you have any information on how to safely produce specific chain sequences on anywhere near the scale Kassie her e is proposing, you can piss off."
#######
"Piss off?" The woman from the panel said, after Jake had finished talking to Kassie an bid her goodbye, "That'll tick some people off."
Jake shrugged and ran his fingers through his sandy-blonde hair, "Fuck em. I played nice with the other groups because they had some drive...those fuckers had silver spoons wedged so far up their ass that I'm surprised they didn't die of metal toxicity. Besides, I know their type. They wanted me to humiliate that poor girl and probably were doing so before I even came in the room."
"Personal experience?" The woman said, smoothing her dress out. She giggled at his frown, "no need to answer, you've told me stories about the "mega douchebags," and the "Ultra-bitches" you had to deal with."
Jake sighed, "Not 'bitches'...bitch. I don't even think those little bastards are that bad."
"I don't know, it sounds like you're exagerrating whenever you tell me about...Jess was it?"
Jake turned to her, "She was a monster, Jan." He began to visually shake in anger as he remembered a long series of abuse, "If I ever even saw her again, I don't know what I'd do."
Jan smiled and reached into her purse, withdrawing her smart phone. She unlocked it and put the screen up to Jake's face, "Well, then, let's find out, shall we?"
Jake looked at the scanned paper, which was a CV for one Jess Knightley. At first, Jake didn't want to believe it but all of the details matched. She had even included the honors award that only their high school gave out.
Jan watched her boss with a look of fascination, her answer ready for for his obvious yet unspoken question.
"I added an algorithm to the selection process which would hotline an applicant if she shared a common background with any member of management...you know, to weed out people who were "old friends" or family members. If you like, I can send her rejection letter on some stationary that has the words "fuck you" around its borders."
Jake didn't say anything for a while, just letting his thoughts merge, "No, is it an important job? Is she qualified for it?"
Jan shot back a wary look, "It's a lower mid-level job in our investments and Acquisitions department, not essential but it does offer the opportunity to advance in a few years. Like most of the applicants, I'd argue she's actually overqualified...though it's pretty clear she's desperate for it, based on the sweat that was all over the corners of her CV, then again, our New York Office is where she applied. If she's jobless in NYC, she's pretty much screwed without this."
"Tell you what, have her come in for an interview on Friday, 9'oclock...no wait, have her meet us at the penthouse office on 11th, I think we should make her interview memorable, don't you?
"Memorable?" Jan said, her tongue moving over her bottom lip, "this wouldn't be like that time we made those embezzling secretaries have a memorable...disciplinary staffing, would it?"
"Oh no." Jake said, smiling fiendishly, his dark green eyes igniting with thoughts of what Friday would bring, "this will be much more prolonged...and severe."