the psychology of forced-bi fantasies

[PaxNurgle]

If this is the wrong place to talk about this then I apologize.

I just wanted to share ideas on femdom and the idea of forced bisexuality and cuckold play- not just to share specific fantasies- because I know this is not uncommon, but the whole dynamic behind it.

I realize this is probably not as uncommon a fetish as people might think- having a hotwife or dominant female partner that you submit to sexually in an intimate setting (or perhaps in all aspects of life beyond just the bedroom) and not only allowing her to cheat on you, but becoming an active participant in it. And then not only watching her be serviced by another man, but having her order you to submit to her lover- sexually- as well.

While common, I know this is clearly not for everyone, and in fact will be a turnoff/hard limit for many.

Some say it's a sign of latent homosexual or bisexual tendencies, but for me it is not that. I am not sexually attracted to men at all, and would actually be repulsed by the idea of having sex with a man- unless my female dominant was with me and ordered me to.

Because, for me it is 1) an ultimate act of submission, and a turn-on to submit to my domme's fantasies to such a degree- because verbal degredation/humiliation are part of my kinks, so to speak. and 2) it is partly an act of voyeurism to see a woman to whom I am intensely attracted to, be pleasured by another man (and know, or believe, that perhaps he can pleasure her better than I can.) And 3) with her having multiple partners, she can get to experience more variety and not feel "trapped" in a stale monogamous relationship. So this is all part of it for me.

Just wondering your thoughts on this- I hope I am not out of line and I don't want to just turn this into a wank-fest thread.

 

[OdysseusMan]

Yes...

I couldn't have said it any better...good points...

 

[bushyTrail]

Thanks for sharing this: not being myself into either of these things, I've been wondering about their meaning for those who practice them.
I wonder though, do you get any pleasure from the sex with the other man too, or it comes from the mere knowledge of what you are doing?

 

[PaxNurgle]

I get pleasure from basically, seeing my lover satisfied, and being willing to go through something like this for her. I do not enjoy the act of sex with another man per se- ESPECIALLY without any woman around, as the thought would otherwise make me uncomfortable. So, it is the knowledge of what I am doing, for her.

 

[Jada59]

I don't personally "get" the cuckold thing, in that it's not for me. But two men together? Oh yeah! I have never seen this in real life though. I do have gay friends but somehow I wouldn't feel right asking to watch them and I doubt that they'd let me.

My former FWB was bit but during the time we were together, he never found another guy.

I do get off on the idea of the guy I'm with sucking another guy's cock or even jacking him off, especially if I got to assist but... That will probably remain a fantasy because I can't really envision it happening for real.

 

[dashd]

I don't know about others, but the idea of forced bisexuality is a turn on for me because it's such a "taboo" activity and not having control of the situation relieves me of "responsibility". I've discussed a willingness once to suck a cock for my wife and was chastised for even suggesting it so for now it remains a fantasy. I have on rare occasions gotten my wife to feed me my own cum.

 

[Ginlover]

Not femdom but forced bisexuality a massive turn off for me. Girl girl is a hard limit. In virtual play a Dom kept pushing the idea. I made it clear again it’s a limit I’m not interested in. He dropped it. Recently he did it again and I went from really turned on to stopping play because he shared picture of his partner, pushing to know how it made me feel. No we won’t be playing again after that. To me forced bisexuality can only sit with pre agreed consent like CNC.

 

[SissySalina]

This makes perfect sense, it is the act of servitude to Her and has nothing to do with him.
It is doing something that normally would not occur just to satisfy and demonstrate the devotion to Her. It is the ultimate feeling.

 

[liqueur]

I've been out of touch these past few months. I'm hoping to resurrect this very worthwhile discussion topic. I think the dynamics that underlie it are only dimly understood. By me, at least But it fascinates me.

... ideas on femdom and the idea of forced bisexuality and cuckold play- not just to share specific fantasies- because I know this is not uncommon, but the whole dynamic behind it. ....

Some say it's a sign of latent homosexual or bisexual tendencies, but for me it is not that. I am not sexually attracted to men at all, and would actually be repulsed by the idea of having sex with a man- unless my female dominant was with me and ordered me to.

For me, there's both. I love cock, and I love being submissive to cock almost as much as I love being submissive to a woman. So where both are blended together, the increase in erotic intensity is almost exponential. The role play is such a big part of this. I don't mean playing out some pre-agreed scenario, I mean the general "suspension of disbelief." Being "forced" is—for me— so much more arousing than simply sucking or being fucked of my own volition. Consensual non-consent, as someone already noted above.

Not to put too fine a point on it, being in some way manipulated into that situation is, for me, even more arousing than being physically forced, though either is intensely arousing. Interestingly, I was aroused by fantasies about this for many years before I discovered I actually liked cock for cock's sake. Some might insist that that's evidence of the "latent tendencies" idea. Others might say it's a form of habituation. To either, I say "maybe..." But really, I think in my own psyche, it's two separate and very different dynamics at play.

... for me it is an ultimate act of submission, and a turn-on to submit to my domme's fantasies to such a degree- because verbal degredation/humiliation are part of my kinks, so to speak.

YES!

... partly an act of voyeurism to see a woman to whom I am intensely attracted to, be pleasured by another man (and know, or believe, that perhaps he can pleasure her better than I can.)

Yes again—but particularly, the latter half of that statement. For me, actually being present is much less important than being made to know that another man is more "manly" and more able to satisfy than I am

her having multiple partners, she can get to experience more variety and not feel "trapped" in a stale monogamous relationship. .

I love a woman who knows what she wants, and isn't afraid to take it—wherever, whenever, and with whomever she wants it

 

[midlifecrisispanties]

I came to realize that I'm genuinely bisexual, so it is a bit different for me. But the idea of "doing" another man because she ordered me to, directed what I was to do, and how to do it; is a frequent subject of ours during a release session. I've relayed some of my fantasies on the boards.

But I agree that the fantasy is enhanced by the thought of it being something she orders me to do.

 

[yukonnights]

If this is the wrong place to talk about this then I apologize.

I just wanted to share ideas on femdom and the idea of forced bisexuality and cuckold play- not just to share specific fantasies- because I know this is not uncommon, but the whole dynamic behind it.

I realize this is probably not as uncommon a fetish as people might think- having a hotwife or dominant female partner that you submit to sexually in an intimate setting (or perhaps in all aspects of life beyond just the bedroom) and not only allowing her to cheat on you, but becoming an active participant in it. And then not only watching her be serviced by another man, but having her order you to submit to her lover- sexually- as well.

While common, I know this is clearly not for everyone, and in fact will be a turnoff/hard limit for many.

Some say it's a sign of latent homosexual or bisexual tendencies, but for me it is not that. I am not sexually attracted to men at all, and would actually be repulsed by the idea of having sex with a man- unless my female dominant was with me and ordered me to.

Because, for me it is 1) an ultimate act of submission, and a turn-on to submit to my domme's fantasies to such a degree- because verbal degredation/humiliation are part of my kinks, so to speak. and 2) it is partly an act of voyeurism to see a woman to whom I am intensely attracted to, be pleasured by another man (and know, or believe, that perhaps he can pleasure her better than I can.) And 3) with her having multiple partners, she can get to experience more variety and not feel "trapped" in a stale monogamous relationship. So this is all part of it for me.

Just wondering your thoughts on this- I hope I am not out of line and I don't want to just turn this into a wank-fest thread.

I don't personally "get" the cuckold thing, in that it's not for me. But two men together? Oh yeah! I have never seen this in real life though. I do have gay friends but somehow I wouldn't feel right asking to watch them and I doubt that they'd let me.

My former FWB was bit but during the time we were together, he never found another guy.

I do get off on the idea of the guy I'm with sucking another guy's cock or even jacking him off, especially if I got to assist but... That will probably remain a fantasy because I can't really envision it happening for real.

I chose the parts in BOLD above because I think taken together they point to an important issue we often overlook. Like most human traits, both dominant/submissive and heterosexual/homosexual reside on a spectrum. These, as so much of who we are, are innate (inborn, natural) parts of our personality. In the case of a cuckold, there is obviously a very strong need toward submissiveness. That this becomes sexualized is not all that unusual. People sexualize any number of things. Most of these "fetishes" are incomprehensible to others.

As Pax made clear, he isn't innately bisexual. It's the submissive itch that fuels the willingness and ability to service a man — but in the emotions, it's the submission to the wife that brings the thrill.

The point I think is important is this; We all understand the spectrum of sexuality concept. The spectrum of Dominant to sub is very much the same kind of concept. In fact, I think the D/s personality spectrum plays as important of a role in our sexuality as hetero/homo does.

 

[freakyguy41]

I don't get sexual satisfaction from my submission when satisfying another male... it's all about the need to submit... particularly at my wife's instruction...

 

[maxlow999]

I do find it to be highly arousing to think about the topic of forced bisexuality, but maybe not so much as a cuckold thing but more of a submissive way of pleasing a woman. Letting her take control.
I often fantasize about her encouraging me to try it. Her teasing me about wanting to do it or her making me do it.
I really have no interest in men, just the cock as an object to submit to under her control. My interest is limited to oral pleasure though.
I am not really sure where this fixation will ever go.

 

[OlderBtm4U]

It’s been enlightening to read the posts here.
Thank you, everyone.

 

[eroticspank]

I don't personally "get" the cuckold thing, in that it's not for me. But two men together? Oh yeah! I have never seen this in real life though. I do have gay friends but somehow I wouldn't feel right asking to watch them and I doubt that they'd let me.

My former FWB was bit but during the time we were together, he never found another guy.

I do get off on the idea of the guy I'm with sucking another guy's cock or even jacking him off, especially if I got to assist but... That will probably remain a fantasy because I can't really envision it happening for real.

I have had this recurring fantasy where my gf is like Jada59 above, she is very turned on by two men together and I end up in a situation with another man because of her and at her direction. We end up doing it in front of her while she watches and or assists.

I am not turned on by men or even Bi, the scene is powerful to me because it is something that is very pleasing to my gf. Like above, I can't really envision it happening for real, so it stays a fantasy.

ES

 

[phil1955]

This would be a pretty easy to make happen if the woman is willing to play with the other guy. Probably would not be that hard finding a man willing to just play with a guy while the woman just watches.

 

[ChasBozwell30]

i think fantasies simply broaden and deeper as you get older. a lot of it becomes as much psychological as physical. i definately have bisexual and submissive fantasies, reinforced by events in my life, and sexual experimentation, and i find the more i discover about it, the more thrilling and exciting it is.

Im attracted to men and women, and have submissive fantasies regarding either, it's not simple, but it is fun x

as for the forced bi element, i love the idea of being made to live out my fantasy, of being controlled, unmade and remade, it's alost beyond words...

 

[Richelieujuniour]

i’ve been with quite a few couples, I’m not bi, and I haven’t really had any gay experiences, per se…

However, I remember the first time that I walked in on the couple whose wife I just fucked inside the guy cleaning up“ I was quite young, and a bit disgusted, Really grossed out to be perfectly honest…

Since then, I realized that almost all of them do this… Some guys or by and using their wives to get near a hard penis, others, enjoy your senior filiation and realist video… And over the years I’ve currently not to be repaired by it, but the kind of get off on the fact… That said one and three will try and grab her suck my dick and I almost always lose my erection…

I can fix a lot of things, but not that!

 

[PaxNurgle]

I'm not sure if I lost some of the meaning of your post through Google (mis-)Translate, but what I think I'm getting is, if you are a "Bull," like in your case where you are screwing another man's wife, it can be a bit of a turn-off to be involved in a forced-bi cuckold scenario if that is not your thing as well. In other words, the wife should have either discussed the whole scenario with you first ahead of time, to make sure you were into it, or else, if you were not, she should have sought after a man who was either openly bisexual or at least comfortable with the idea of "topping" both the wife and cuckold husband, and who was into the whole power trip of it.

Just like being the cuckolded hubby is certainly not for everyone (it's for only a select few, actually), being the bull in these scenarios probably isn't everyone's cup of tea either.

 

[Richelieujuniour]

I'm not sure if I lost some of the meaning of your post through Google (mis-)Translate, but what I think I'm getting is, if you are a "Bull," like in your case where you are screwing another man's wife, it can be a bit of a turn-off to be involved in a forced-bi cuckold scenario if that is not your thing as well. In other words, the wife should have either discussed the whole scenario with you first ahead of time, to make sure you were into it, or else, if you were not, she should have sought after a man who was either openly bisexual or at least comfortable with the idea of "topping" both the wife and cuckold husband, and who was into the whole power trip of it.

Just like being the cuckolded hubby is certainly not for everyone (it's for only a select few, actually), being the bull in these scenarios probably isn't everyone's cup of tea either.

You understood me completely (even though I don’t really think of myself as a ‘bull’)! Thanks for the clarification!