Sparky Kronkite
Spam Eater Extraordinare'
- Joined
- Aug 15, 2000
- Posts
- 8,921
Here in NYC you get to see some really unique stuff.
I just witnessed a, get this shit, an - An Afro-American, White-faced Mime Puppeteer, performing with Clown Puppets, that Sculpted Balloon Animals to Abba and Carpenter's songs. All on a folding cardboard stage made of Wonder Bread boxes.
Get it? "White" bread!!!! Abba, the Carpenter's? Man this guy is a genius. I smell Letterman.
And while we're at it - "ART," that is, "art" - in all caps and censorship too - let's not forget censorship - let's talk.
My long time plan - and soon to be implemented too.
I've been planning, thoroughly planning, no shit - the grand artistic creation of my life-time. I've decided that, since I hate fucking censorship so much - I would create the most offensive "piece" of art - ever created.
And oh what a piece it would be.
It will primarily be described as "sculpted collage" and will include all aspects of "modern and traditional audiovisual media." There will be traditional aspects - paint, stone, clay, plaster, etc.. And it will have modern electronic aspects - computers, TV, radio and sound, etc.. It will offend "all the human senses." I will look repulsive, sound horrid, smell despicable and even taste bad. Violence, War, Torture, Sex, Bestiality, Necrophilia, - all negative human emotions - historic nasty's, like Hitler, Billy the Kid, Bonnie & Clyde and Roseanne and Cathy Lee - will all have their faces immortalized within it's artistic greatness.
It will include all the elements of all things human find repulsive. It will include all non-PC fundamentals and beyond - relative to all races, religions and beliefs. It will include all this as equally as possible, as I would want to offend all people equally.
I envision it a huge pile, a curled pile - one big giant piece of shit - with all these TV monitors, computers, speakers, paintings and other sculpture - stuck in the side of it.
All as offensive as could possibly be conceived.
It's working title? Universal, Steaming Pile of Dung.
When it was (as it inevitably will/won't be) "not allowed to show," I'd take it all the way baby!!! Supreme Court!!!! Me and Larry Flynt! (He'd be only one of my many sponsors.)
I tell yah - I'd be uber famous. Star of all the talk shows. When they asked me - why? Why did you set out to create this massively repulsive…… thing?
I'd just turn to the camera and smile and say, "Because I could! You fucking idiots."
Hah - brilliant!!! Because I could.
Every head in America would scratch and think to themselves - "What? Who is this guy? Sparky who? Huh? Dear, where's my clicker? Where's my clicker? Commies are coming back!! I tell ya…………. Margaret, God Damn It!!! Where's my clicker!"
And that's the kind of shit I really love. That was my goal in the first place. Art, I love it. If it don't make you scratch your head….. well its artistic value is in question. If art doesn't make you scratch your head "and think" it's really just an ornament now isn't it.
I just witnessed a, get this shit, an - An Afro-American, White-faced Mime Puppeteer, performing with Clown Puppets, that Sculpted Balloon Animals to Abba and Carpenter's songs. All on a folding cardboard stage made of Wonder Bread boxes.
Get it? "White" bread!!!! Abba, the Carpenter's? Man this guy is a genius. I smell Letterman.
And while we're at it - "ART," that is, "art" - in all caps and censorship too - let's not forget censorship - let's talk.
My long time plan - and soon to be implemented too.
I've been planning, thoroughly planning, no shit - the grand artistic creation of my life-time. I've decided that, since I hate fucking censorship so much - I would create the most offensive "piece" of art - ever created.
And oh what a piece it would be.
It will primarily be described as "sculpted collage" and will include all aspects of "modern and traditional audiovisual media." There will be traditional aspects - paint, stone, clay, plaster, etc.. And it will have modern electronic aspects - computers, TV, radio and sound, etc.. It will offend "all the human senses." I will look repulsive, sound horrid, smell despicable and even taste bad. Violence, War, Torture, Sex, Bestiality, Necrophilia, - all negative human emotions - historic nasty's, like Hitler, Billy the Kid, Bonnie & Clyde and Roseanne and Cathy Lee - will all have their faces immortalized within it's artistic greatness.
It will include all the elements of all things human find repulsive. It will include all non-PC fundamentals and beyond - relative to all races, religions and beliefs. It will include all this as equally as possible, as I would want to offend all people equally.
I envision it a huge pile, a curled pile - one big giant piece of shit - with all these TV monitors, computers, speakers, paintings and other sculpture - stuck in the side of it.
All as offensive as could possibly be conceived.
It's working title? Universal, Steaming Pile of Dung.
When it was (as it inevitably will/won't be) "not allowed to show," I'd take it all the way baby!!! Supreme Court!!!! Me and Larry Flynt! (He'd be only one of my many sponsors.)
I tell yah - I'd be uber famous. Star of all the talk shows. When they asked me - why? Why did you set out to create this massively repulsive…… thing?
I'd just turn to the camera and smile and say, "Because I could! You fucking idiots."
Hah - brilliant!!! Because I could.
Every head in America would scratch and think to themselves - "What? Who is this guy? Sparky who? Huh? Dear, where's my clicker? Where's my clicker? Commies are coming back!! I tell ya…………. Margaret, God Damn It!!! Where's my clicker!"
And that's the kind of shit I really love. That was my goal in the first place. Art, I love it. If it don't make you scratch your head….. well its artistic value is in question. If art doesn't make you scratch your head "and think" it's really just an ornament now isn't it.
