The "I don't want to talk about AI" thread, and the new topic is: food, and why we love it

[Five_Inch_Heels]

View attachment 2569234

No pointy ears?

 

[Bamagan]

And now for something completely different*: I have one story languishing in pending for a not-inconsiderable amount of time. I uploaded another about five minutes ago and it's already approved.
Literotica works in mysterious ways.

*Okay, only a little different, and only in the context of this specific thread.

Edit: If the blazing quick turnaround time doesn't strongly suggest an automated system pass of some kind, I also asked for a specific publish date which was not granted. I'm not upset about that, it barely matters in the long run, but in the past Laurel has pretty much always obliged such requests. It isn't a long story, just 8k words or so, but I can't believe it got more than a glance from human eyes, if that. Again, not complaining, but it's a weird data point considering all the angst here lately.

Carry on!

 

[StillStunned]

Quickly steering this thread away from a potential mire...

We’re getting properly into cold season on these latitudes, so I’ll share my favorite flu cure:

Light a candle at the foot of the bed. Get into bed and under the covers. Drink booze of choice until you see three candles. Go to sleep, and in the morning the flu will be gone. (Or perhaps overshadowed with a hangover so bad you stop noticing the flu. Same same but different.)

My go-to cure is half a bottle of the cheapest port. Repeat as necessary. And if you wake up feeling awful, at least you got some enjoyment out of it.

And for safety reasons I prefer placing a cat at the foot of my bed instead of a candle.

 

[TheLobster]

There have been 180 stories published today, which is more than usual and probably around the "norm" from several months ago, so perhaps something in the process finally got uncorked.

My guess is that the rest of the staff is finally getting the hang of doing the reviews without Laurel.

Quickly steering this thread away from a potential mire...

Too late!

 

[Bamagan]

Quickly steering this thread away from a potential mire...

Beware the rodents of unusual size... unless you're Shagrat in name and deed.

 

[StillStunned]

Beware the rodents of unusual size... unless you're Shagrat in name and deed.

He likes them big and bouncy!

 

[Bamagan]

He likes them big and bouncy!

That's what drives him to the strongest orc-gasms, I hear.

 

[MillieDynamite]

Let's not talk about colds and allergies, please, between them and the walking newmonia, opps, I mean penamonia, it's been a rough, fucking year.

 

[Five_Inch_Heels]

So, Rush, in concert?

New drummer?

Anika Nilles?

 

[SamanthaBehgs]

Let's not talk about colds and allergies, please, between them and the walking newmonia, opps, I mean penamonia, it's been a rough, fucking year.

I know what you mean about rough years. Let's instead talk about something wonderful that has happened to us in the past year. Pick something small, or big, who cares. It's not the size that counts, right?

I'll pick one first. The ratings on my first and second stories here are WAY higher than I expected them to be. I mean, I know I don't have a lot of views and I didn't expect to, that's not the *why* for my writing. But it's still kinda nice.

 

[iwatchus]

Mine is easy. I started writing here seven and a half months ago and realized I was addicted to it. Then I discovered the forum and made the closest friend I have met in years. Among several people on here I now consider friends. And I very rarely make friends.

Some shitty things happened this year as well, but, right now I will take the good over the bad.

 

[Lifestyle66]

Let's not talk about colds and allergies, please, between them and the walking newmonia, opps, I mean penamonia, it's been a rough, fucking year.

Now there's a subject: Rough fucking years!

My wife is at the ending days of her latest set of hormone pellets (every 90-days). Those give her energy, help her sleep better, and increases her libido. And in the ending week or two of the three months prescription, the hormones are wearing off, and she starts getting lethargic and irritable. Just a week ago, we got into a BIG fight, so bad that I was debating heading out and not returning.

But things between us cooled a little. And Saturday evening, we attended a party (planned months in advance) with a live band and some dancing. I could tell by the way I had to catch her to keeping her from falling during a spin-out that she had one drink too many. But she was having fun. When we arrived home, SHE suggested I put on a porn video, then it got interesting. She should have been tired and crashing when we got home. But NO! She dared me to keep up with her demands to change positions on the living room floor and to "smack my ass!"

My wife NEVER admits to being wrong or saying she's sorry. But she has her ways of showing it.

Once her latest set of pellets kick in, I need to find the right paddle to please her (and she agreed) for the next time she has to NOT apologize. (My left wrist doesn't bend as well as it used to, and I don't want to just smack one side too much.)

It's a promising start to a very rough-fucking year!

 

[MillieDynamite]

@StillStunned, I do not choose to select what we talk about. This is not something a person, such as I, Millie Dynamite, is comfortable doing for others. Ask Nicely, Nicely, or the Professor, or Waldo Wincheste. Mayhaps or perchance you can catch Nathan Detroit and Harry the Horse down at the delicatessen partaking of cheesecake or a roast of beef sandwich. Dave the Dude, the horse-player Regret, might also be there, and you can check with them what they would prefer for a gabfesting. But I, nor my household, would presume even to suggest you go for Mindy's for a meal or snack. Ain't none of my beeswax.

Oh, maybe I read too much Damon Runyon the other night.

Edited to remove contraction. Runyon did use no stinking contractions.

 

[Five_Inch_Heels]

And now for something completely not altogether indifferent.

 

[MillieDynamite]

Yes!

And now for something completely not altogether indifferent.

 

[SamanthaBehgs]

@StillStunned, I do not choose to select what we talk about. This is not something a person, such as I, Millie Dynamite, is comfortable doing for others. Ask Nicely, Nicely, or the Professor, or Waldo Wincheste. Mayhaps or perchance you can catch Nathan Detroit and Harry the Horse down at the delicatessen partaking of cheesecake or a roast of beef sandwich. Dave the Dude, the horse-player Regret, might also be there, and you can check with them what they would prefer for a gabfesting. But I, nor my household, would presume even to suggest you go for Mindy's for a meal or snack. Ain't none of my beeswax.

Oh, maybe I read too much Damon Runyon the other night.

Edited to remove contraction. Runyon did use no stinking contractions.

Why did your post just make me nostalgic for a good deli sandwich with a pickle from a barrel?

 

[Erozetta]

One of my kitchen favourites is a big chopper that I got for ridiculously cheap on a whim at the markets one day. It came with a warning that if the chopper should be accidentally dropped, one should not attempt to catch it with hands or feet, which seems like solid advice.

Nothing fancy, just a single piece with dimples on the back of the blade for one's fingers. It does the job and it feels good in the hand. I wouldn't recommend it for peeling spuds though.

As suggsested, carrying convo over:

Can confirm. Let it fall. One should not make an attempt to catch sharp objects.

Sincerely,

Someone who often yells "Oww" from the kitchen then quickly, "I'm okay" so my husband doesn't come running. (He now just yells back, "How bad are you bleeding?")

 

[StillStunned]

Someone who often yells "Oww" from the kitchen then quickly, "I'm okay" so my husband doesn't come running. (He now just yells back, "How bad are you bleeding?")

One time when I sliced my hand open with my Bloody Breadknife the wife took one look at all the blood and said, "I'm not cleaning that."

Who needs self-harm if they spend any amount of time in a kitchen?

 

[Erozetta]

One time when I sliced my hand open with my Bloody Breadknife the wife took one look at all the blood and said, "I'm not cleaning that."

Who needs self-harm if they spend any amount of time in a kitchen?

My husband absolutely would clean it up and has cleaned it up.


It's a different kind of experience between expecting it and not. Kinda like no pleasure is derived from a paper cut and paper cuts are immune from my "It takes a hell of a lot to actually hurt" ability.

 

[onehitwanda]

Someone who often yells "Oww" from the kitchen then quickly, "I'm okay" so my husband doesn't come running. (He now just yells back, "How bad are you bleeding?")

I have two very well-stocked first aid kits that made a Doctor friend sit up, stare at me, and go "Wanda, what the fuck, that's more than we have in our Triage ward."

Also, there's nothing quite like the particular note of the scream someone gives when they've just cut their finger off.

(The two stories are connected)

 

[onehitwanda]

paper cut

I have cold chills.

 

[Erozetta]

I have two very well-stocked first aid kits that made a Doctor friend sit up, stare at me, and go "Wanda, what the fuck, that's more than we have in our Triage ward."

Also, there's nothing quite like the particular note of the scream someone gives when they've just cut their finger off.

(The two stories are connected)

I've managed to get my hands on surgical glue for my first aid kit.

My husband has nearly passed out while I held bits of my finger together to glue it back together. No scar or anything. And even better, no ER bill!

 

[Statius]

I

As suggsested, carrying convo over:

Can confirm. Let it fall. One should not make an attempt to catch sharp objects.

Sincerely,

Someone who often yells "Oww" from the kitchen then quickly, "I'm okay" so my husband doesn't come running. (He now just yells back, "How bad are you bleeding?")

n our house it's "how bad did you burn yourself' with the occasional how much blood is there?

 

[onehitwanda]

I've managed to get my hands on surgical glue for my first aid kit.

My husband has nearly passed out while I held bits of my finger together to glue it back together. No scar or anything. And even better, no ER bill!

In a pinch, normal craft superglue (cyanoacrylate) works very well. There's also a reason I keep my knives very sharp - clean cuts area easier to fix than ragged gashes.

Also, and I don't know how this works, but I am the most squeamish person on earth. Give me the anticipation of seeing blood and I will pass out - 100% guaranteed. Put me in a situation where someone is bleeding and I can somehow just pack it all away, deal with the crisis, and then melt down and cry-puke in private later

 

[Erozetta]

I

n our house it's "how bad did you burn yourself' with the occasional how much blood is there?

hahah.

The other day I touched a baking sheet that had been in an oven at 350 degrees for two hours because I wanted to adjust it on the table a little. I had a potholder in my other hand. It took me a second to be like, "Oh, that hurts, stop touching the goddamn pan!"

I'm a good cook and a great baker. I'm also a fucking clutz.