NightyKnight
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The Holidays
- Thread starter NightyKnight
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TE999
How 'bout a kiss, baby
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1) Make sure his Life Insurance is paid up.
2) Have 911 on your phone's speed dial.
3) Be prepared to tell the kids Daddy's only playing after he hits the ground.
4) Set up an e-Bay site to sell his tools.
5) Open an account on e-Harmony.com just in case. Children need a father.
2) Have 911 on your phone's speed dial.
3) Be prepared to tell the kids Daddy's only playing after he hits the ground.
4) Set up an e-Bay site to sell his tools.
5) Open an account on e-Harmony.com just in case. Children need a father.
NightyKnight
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NightyKnight
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Handley_Page
Draco interdum Vincit
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Tell him to wear safety clothes/equipment:
A hard hat is a vital item and safety boots (steel toe-caps, etc.,) are also very good.
Advise him to:-
The Instructions are often written for people like him: This is not to say he's clueless, merely lacking in practice.
Good Luck.
A hard hat is a vital item and safety boots (steel toe-caps, etc.,) are also very good.
Advise him to:-
READ THE INSTRUCTIONS
The Instructions are often written for people like him: This is not to say he's clueless, merely lacking in practice.
Good Luck.
patientlee
I won't tell!
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Just wait until he decides he needs a compressor and a nail gun
We have had enough trouble with a staple gun.
NightyKnight
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Handley_Page
Draco interdum Vincit
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Been there, done that. It's a hammer that he seems to have the most trouble with.
Directions HP? Where are the directions on a hammer?
Come on folks, don't let my hubby suffer by being the only one who gets laughed at today. I KNOW some of you other gals have some whoppers to tell, so fess up! We'll call it, "I really love my husband, but..."
Well, strangely enough, a new hammer in this country (UK) comes with a warning label.
Bramblethorn
Sleep-deprived
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I bought a new kitchen chopper a while back and it came with a warning along the lines of "if you drop this, do not try to catch with your foot". Seems like sound advice.
Sadly, one of my partner's friends lost her father to Home Handyman syndrome. His wife told him repeatedly "you're seventy, don't climb up on the roof, we'll get somebody in to clear the gutters" but he was stubborn, and... yeah :-/
Of course it's not always amateurs. There's a new building going up near our place, and some of the workmen were up high in the scaffolding without safety harnesses. I believe they got a surprise visit from WorkSafe the other day.
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lovecraft68
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I'm very good with cars, but around the house if it can't be done with a screw gun or a hammer we have someone else come over.
The head of the sample making department at work lives a couple of miles down the road and he's made a pretty good sum of money off me over the years doing side jobs for us.
The head of the sample making department at work lives a couple of miles down the road and he's made a pretty good sum of money off me over the years doing side jobs for us.
patientlee
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Ok. I'll play.
Hubby was on a ladder. He fell. He ripped his shorts. And his leg. I was upset that he ripped his good shorts. Skin heals. Denim doesn't.
Hubby was on a ladder. He fell. He ripped his shorts. And his leg. I was upset that he ripped his good shorts. Skin heals. Denim doesn't.
NightyKnight
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patientlee
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OMG! That just reminded me of the first time my cousin got on a horse - ripped his jeans right off his body when he got thrown, but that's one for another day.
Sounds like a good one though!
NightyKnight
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FYI, it wasn't a staple gun, it was a hammer tacker. When I was hanging insulation, I hit my thumb instead of the overlapping paper and stapled this stud to the stud in the wall. Bigger problem was the pliers were just out of reach and I had to yank my thumb free.
NightyKnight
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patientlee
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Okay, thanks. Note to self, hammer tacker goes back to store before Christmas morning.
It's good advice.
StrangeLife
Eater of beef
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Men do not read instructions!
And we never ask for directions either. It's a genetic thing...
Men do not read instructions!
And we never ask for directions either. It's a genetic thing...
Unless it's naked or has pictures (preferably both) it only good as a fire starter.
patientlee
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Men do not read instructions!
And we never ask for directions either. It's a genetic thing...
I had originally written something about it being MEN who needed instructions, but I didn't want to piss off the menfolk. (Not you, Doopey.)
MSTarot
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Construction worker advice 101
If you don't know what you are doing you need to be the 'helper' not the person doing the work. Yes, you can save money but the pain possibilities are endless.
If you insist on doing it yourself learn the injury statistics for whatever your doing.
In my trade it is a given you're going to have at least 2 major (See go to the emergency room) injuries for every ten years you work. That is with well trained personnel, doing the job in the most safe way possible. 2 every 10.
We are not the most dangerous trade either. There are many that are worse.
Also soft pampering of injuries leads to more of them. You kind of want all that attention so you hurt yourself again.
Next time he smashes his thumb and the fingernail turns black get a pair of vice grip pliers and a finishing nail. Clamp it on then heat it red hot. Touch the top of the fingernail with it and it will burn through in a second. The blood under the nail is released and with that the throbbing goes away. He can then tape it up and go back to work.
He wont hit it a second time that night.
(Yes, I've done it. It is every bit as grizzly as it sounds but it does work.)
BY the way unless he is a licensed Electrician you can say it was justified to give him a pop with a taser or stun gun. Just to let him know what he's going to be feeling when he tries to wire up that ceiling fan.
(twenty years as a mason= dislocated left thumb, severely torn ligaments in left ankle falling off scaffold, compressed disk in my back from lifting too heavy, and a piece of grinder blade had to be surgically removed from my right arm after the blade exploded.)
MST
If you don't know what you are doing you need to be the 'helper' not the person doing the work. Yes, you can save money but the pain possibilities are endless.
If you insist on doing it yourself learn the injury statistics for whatever your doing.
In my trade it is a given you're going to have at least 2 major (See go to the emergency room) injuries for every ten years you work. That is with well trained personnel, doing the job in the most safe way possible. 2 every 10.
We are not the most dangerous trade either. There are many that are worse.
Also soft pampering of injuries leads to more of them. You kind of want all that attention so you hurt yourself again.
Next time he smashes his thumb and the fingernail turns black get a pair of vice grip pliers and a finishing nail. Clamp it on then heat it red hot. Touch the top of the fingernail with it and it will burn through in a second. The blood under the nail is released and with that the throbbing goes away. He can then tape it up and go back to work.
He wont hit it a second time that night.
(Yes, I've done it. It is every bit as grizzly as it sounds but it does work.)
BY the way unless he is a licensed Electrician you can say it was justified to give him a pop with a taser or stun gun. Just to let him know what he's going to be feeling when he tries to wire up that ceiling fan.
(twenty years as a mason= dislocated left thumb, severely torn ligaments in left ankle falling off scaffold, compressed disk in my back from lifting too heavy, and a piece of grinder blade had to be surgically removed from my right arm after the blade exploded.)
MST
patientlee
I won't tell!
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Construction worker advice 101
If you don't know what you are doing you need to be the 'helper' not the person doing the work. Yes, you can save money but the pain possibilities are endless.
If you insist on doing it yourself learn the injury statistics for whatever your doing.
In my trade it is a given you're going to have at least 2 major (See go to the emergency room) injuries for every ten years you work. That is with well trained personnel, doing the job in the most safe way possible. 2 every 10.
We are not the most dangerous trade either. There are many that are worse.
Also soft pampering of injuries leads to more of them. You kind of want all that attention so you hurt yourself again.
Next time he smashes his thumb and the fingernail turns black get a pair of vice grip pliers and a finishing nail. Clamp it on then heat it red hot. Touch the top of the fingernail with it and it will burn through in a second. The blood under the nail is released and with that the throbbing goes away. He can then tape it up and go back to work.
He wont hit it a second time that night.
(Yes, I've done it. It is every bit as grizzly as it sounds but it does work.)
BY the way unless he is a licensed Electrician you can say it was justified to give him a pop with a taser or stun gun. Just to let him know what he's going to be feeling when he tries to wire up that ceiling fan.
(twenty years as a mason= dislocated left thumb, severely torn ligaments in left ankle falling off scaffold, compressed disk in my back from lifting too heavy, and a piece of grinder blade had to be surgically removed from my right arm after the blade exploded.)
MST
That was gross.
That was gross.
Sorta glad I'm an accountant..
Only think we have worry about is being indicted!
