The Golden Days of A Brutal U.P. Critique

[WickedEve]

Suggesting that you drop a "the" or two, and changing the order of two words, and other minute changes is NOTHING! Toughen up poets!

Below is part of a brutal Unmasked Poet critique that I received last year.

I won’t attempt to torture a confession from this poem. Although I am tempted to try, how else could I pay back this rhyme for the agony I went through reading it?
I have become spoiled by Eve. She makes me smile cry and think at the same time with much of her work.
Yet here all I can manage akin to a state of being or bodily expression is a groan.

The last stanza sputters and gasps in my opinion. While quick the ending is not merciful. I am left without a ride, wounded, battered and dazed. I am now far too fatigued, someone please call the NTSB, a calamity of this magnitude certainly falls within their jurisdiction.

Wicked, on this one you lost me.

He said something about gouging his eyes out in a critique for another poet. tee hee hee But most of us took his comments like true poets! We cowered in the corners of the thread, whimpering our pathetic thank you's. Those were golden days when a critique left you trembling.

The reason for this thread? Just reminiscing.

 

[Blarneystoned]

William Wallace..haha

I will speak to ye of William Wallace..now history will say that I am a liar..but history is written by those who have hanged heros.


Have you ever read poems written by slaves....they arent grammatically correct..and the english is not very good...yet it exudes the historical time and their every day life...Im sure if the slave owner had edited it...it would seem like life was a bowl of cherries.

Much the same if you read the historical text written by early American writers some educated some not...take Mark Twain for instance..Would Huckleberry Fin and Tom Sawyer have seemed so real?

Someone who speaks about gouging their eyes out when the read someones work ..should have their eyes gouged out for they have no business critiquing anything and are probably just some coffee house moron....I suggest watching Good Will Hunting...How do you like dem apples ?

Blarney

 

[WickedEve]

Blarney, please don't fuck with my reminiscing.

 

[Blarneystoned]

Now that was funny...haha

Go ahead grandma reminesce all you want...haha

 

[WickedEve]

Thank you, sonny. Now go fetch my rheumatism medicine!

 

[daughter]

A year later

WE--

You came to the boards with talent. Made it your business to learn about the craft. Helluva combination: talent and skill.

You've grown. The beginnings were okay. What you write now is the envy of plenty.

Thanks for putting up with those mean, nasty critics. LOL

Peace,

d

 

[WickedEve]

Re: A year later

WE--

You came to the boards with talent. Made it your business to learn about the craft. Helluva combination: talent and skill.

You've grown. The beginnings were okay. What you write now is the envy of plenty.

Thanks for putting up with those mean, nasty critics. LOL

Peace,

d

I'm wicked but daughter is the wicked witch of poetry!
D, I really feel fortunate to have been here when you and U.P. were. I try to remember what it's like to be new on a board, and to never have had a poem critiqued. I want to be gentle, and not scare newbies away, but I don't want to let them think that everything they write is perfect. Shoot, I'd still be writing About My Panties poetry if U.P. and you hadn't spanked and encouraged me in the beginning. (yes, I said spank. I'm such a spank slut.)

 

[perks]

I have to agree, Eve, I too miss those days. When it was about the writing.

When we wanted UP and daughter to tear it up, so we could be better. When it was more about style, class and rhythm.

They knew we had heart, intensity, longing. We wanted them to mold it, shape our clay.

Fuck, I miss the reality of it.

 

[Goodguy2]

Okay

Will some of you critique the poem I just posted under the Yum and Cum post? Be mean and nasty. I can take it.

GG

 

[perks]

Re: Okay

Will some of you critique the poem I just posted under the Yum and Cum post? Be mean and nasty. I can take it.

GG

I'm rusty, but I'll take a stab at it.

 

[daughter]

perky baby

I miss your crazy ass. You know where we are.

Let me know when you post something new here, I'll spank you. LOL

Seriously, things were a lot more interesting when we talked about the poetry and weren't overly concerned about tender feelings.

Granted I'm candid, but I don't want your blood. I simply want my peers to think more about writing and craft. Poetry is literature and literature is written for an audience. When you write for yourself, it's a journal entry. Don't get offended because someone isn't balling simply because you did when you wrote it.

It's futile to debate feelings. Feelings alone won't make a work worthwhile. What makes us think that because something has a feeling that it's enough for the reader? The writer has to have the skill to elicit emotion in a reader. It isn't an automatic.

Who would waste time writing critiques if he wasn't interested in the first place? I don't. If I take time to write it's because you got my attention. What is offensive in that?

Glad to see you on the board, pb.

Peace,

d

 

[perks]

Re: perky baby

I miss your crazy ass. You know where we are.

Let me know when you post something new here, I'll spank you. LOL

Seriously, things were a lot more interesting when we talked about the poetry and weren't overly concerned about tender feelings.

Granted I'm candid, but I don't want your blood. I simply want my peers to think more about writing and craft. Poetry is literature and literature is written for an audience. When you write for yourself, it's a journal entry. Don't get offended because someone isn't balling simply because you did when you wrote it.

It's futile to debate feelings. Feelings alone won't make a work worthwhile. What makes us think that because something has a feeling that it's enough for the reader? The writer has to have the skill to elicit emotion in a reader. It isn't an automatic.

Who would waste time writing critiques if he wasn't interested in the first place? I don't. If I take time to write it's because you got my attention. What is offensive in that?

Glad to see you on the board, pb.

Peace,

d

miss you too, gurl. did you ever switch everything over? I'm so lost, but I'm back, you'll need to email me so I can figure everything out again.
I've posted in yum n cum too. Something small to get my poetry legs back.

tear it up gurl, you know I'd do the same, lol. Remember? haahaha

 

[daughter]

We moved

perky--

My link is active. It'll take you where you need to be.

I'll check out the poem. Give till the weekend. I need to get back to work (Occasionally, I have to earn the dollar) LOL

Peace,

d

(((z lurking out. back to the grind)))

 

[perks]

Re: We moved

perky--

My link is active. It'll take you where you need to be.

I'll check out the poem. Give till the weekend. I need to get back to work (Occasionally, I have to earn the dollar) LOL

Peace,

d

(((z lurking out. back to the grind)))

do you remember my password?

 

[daughter]

LOL

check your pm box.

((shaking my head with laughter))