"The Dog Who Ate the Lube," By Me

[CHNOPS]

Once upon a time there was a dog, we'll call him, "Sonny's dog." Once upon the same time, there was a nice, handy pump-bottle water-based lube next to a particular couple's bed. We'll call the couple, "Sonny and Sonny's wife." We'll call the lube, "lube."

One day, ("today"), the dog ate the lube.

Ate it. Chewed the bottle, licked the lube. He left untouched one (1) Hitachi Magic Wand, which is why this story is not called, "The Dog Who Sonny's Wife Beat to Death with a Broken Hitachi Magic Wand."

I have rejected the obvious solution of fucking the dog's mouth, FYI, you sick fucks.

The End

Please comment and vote!!! I want to win the contest!!!

 

[Super-Surprise]

 

[Disgustipated]

Once upon a time there was a dog, we'll call him, "Sonny's dog." Once upon the same time, there was a nice, handy pump-bottle water-based lube next to a particular couple's bed. We'll call the couple, "Sonny and Sonny's wife." We'll call the lube, "lube."

One day, ("today"), the dog ate the lube.

Ate it. Chewed the bottle, licked the lube. He left untouched one (1) Hitachi Magic Wand, which is why this story is not called, "The Dog Who Sonny's Wife Beat to Death with a Broken Hitachi Magic Wand."

I have rejected the obvious solution of fucking the dog's mouth, FYI, you sick fucks.

The End

Please comment and vote!!! I want to win the contest!!![/QUOTE

 

[Bert Notorius]

 

[Joeybagadonuts]

I hope you plan to keep that lubed up dog outside for a few days.

 

[Disgustipated]

Is that a male pretending to be a bitch?

 

[CHNOPS]

Is that a male pretending to be a bitch?

LOMFL.

 

[Bert Notorius]

 

[CHNOPS]

I hope you plan to keep that lubed up dog outside for a few days.

Professor Google reveals that the eating of lube is practically a second career for both dogs and toddlers, and that they neither vomit nor die.

The only other effect I expect, happens outside anyway.

 

[Bert Notorius]

 

[Aquagal]

Hopefully his sphincter is tight.

 

[QueenLevitra]

Oh geez...

 

[warrior queen]

Hahaha
Beat post so far today!

 

[Bert Notorius]

 

[parodyluvr75]

I gave it 5 stars.

 

[QueenLevitra]

I gave it 5 stars.

All the dogs are named Ralph.

 

[CHNOPS]

All the dogs are named Ralph.

Not yet, anyway.

 

[parodyluvr75]

Not on the couch, I hope.

 

[QueenLevitra]

Not in your bed, they prey.

 

[Sinny]

You forgot to post the brand name of said lube. That is an important detail. I simply cannot vote for this story.

 

[Colonel Hogan]

Professor Google reveals that the eating of lube is practically a second career for both dogs and toddlers, and that they neither vomit nor die.

The only other effect I expect, happens outside anyway.

I suggest you keep vigil at your back door for any animals of any species loitering around with an obviously happy face.

And possibly walking a little funny.

 

[Joeybagadonuts]

Professor Google reveals that the eating of lube is practically a second career for both dogs and toddlers, and that they neither vomit nor die.

The only other effect I expect, happens outside anyway.

I'm sure that he wants to continue to please you by taking care of business outside but considering the circumstances, he might not be able to keep from disappointing you.

At least he didn't eat your stash of gurlie mags.

 

[KingOrfeo]

"Lube? Sorry, honey, the dog ate it. Now bend over."

 

[Phelia]

Four stars. Wanted to give you a five, but I only came twice. And it was a little wordy.

 

[CHNOPS]

Poop #1: Normal.