The Bridal Shower Thread

[shereads]

Welcome to the Luckster-Vella Bridal Shower, a virtual orgy of presents, punch and pulchritude for penny-pinching pornsters. Gift-giving is mandatory but free. Limericks are encouraged.

The shower is being held at this exquisite private retreat at Fes, Morocco, Palais El Ghalia:

http://storage.chatropolis.com/userfiles/shereads/palais.jpg


Nice, isn't it? Check this out: their produce lives better than my family.

http://storage.chatropolis.com/userfiles/shereads/04.jpg


If we were allowed inside, the room below is where I would have set out the buffet. What a fabulous catering space!

http://storage.chatropolis.com/userfiles/shereads/palais2.jpg

Unfortunately, Palais El Ghalia rents for around US$12,000/week. So we'll be partying behind the pool house in this classic, partially-restored 1961 "Bambi" travel trailer by Airstream:

http://storage.chatropolis.com/userfiles/shereads/bambi-I.jpg

Vella and Lucky, I hope you like vintage Airstream trailers as much as I do, because it's your wedding gift. Good luck towing it back to the USA. Getting it to Morocco was a bitch. Getting it onto the palace grounds almost got me torn apart by dogs. (Bring wieners.)

Here's a room that would have been perfect for belly-dancing and charades, as I tried to explain to the caretaker, Mustafah, an inexplicably hostile eunuch.

http://storage.chatropolis.com/userfiles/shereads/partyroom.jpg

We have unlimited access to the palace grounds and gardens until Mustafah makes his rounds and notices the trailer, the nude conga line, the Elvis impersonators and the life-sized ice sculpture of the wedding couple. So post your gift or limerick and help yourselves to punch and cucumber sandwiches.

 

[Dar~]

Who doesn't need . . .
http://www.early2bed.com/Merchant2/graphics/products/phpink.jpg

You've also been entered to win . . .[size=+12]A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF LUBE!!!!!!!![/size]

 

[Colleen Thomas]

The gift I give is my hope that everything in their lives only gets better and my promise to be there, should either of them or both of them ever need me.

 

[matriarch]

The gift I give is my hope that everything in their lives only gets better and my promise to be there, should either of them or both of them ever need me.

Ditto.

 

[impressive]

I want all AH irregulars to send me (or post here) a JPG with your Lit "autograph." I'll make a collage and we'll put it on t-shirts for Lucky & Vella! (Anyone else who wants one will have to buy it through our CafePress site for the anthology.)

 

[TheEarl]

I have no scanner, so I present a mouse-based sig.

The Earl

 

[shereads]

The gift I give is my hope that everything in their lives only gets better and my promise to be there, should either of them or both of them ever need me.

That's nice. Not as nice as a vintage 16-foot travel trailer, but it's the thought that counts.

 

[shereads]

I have no scanner, so I present a mouse-based sig.

The Earl

Oh, Earl. Every couple gets half a dozen of those. Or am I thinking of toasters?

 

[TheEarl]

Oh, Earl. Every couple gets half a dozen of those. Or am I thinking of toasters?

You wait till you see what I'm actually making for them. It'll get some kind of reaction out of you; I guarantee it.

The Earl

 

[impressive]

I have no scanner, so I present a mouse-based sig.

The Earl

Can you make your lines a bit thicker? I'm afraid it won't show up.

 

[shereads]

Ditto.

Two of the same thing?

 

[lucky-E-leven]

Woo Hoo! I love showers!

I can see that gorgeous hand-carved swing getting some serious action!

http://storage.chatropolis.com/userfiles/shereads/palais2.jpg

Oh, and Sher, if the Airstream's rockin', don't bother knockin'! (How many people can you fit in there, anyway?)

I'd tell you all where we registered, but I'm much more interested in seeing what you come up with on your own.

 

[shereads]

Oh, and Sher, if the Airstream's rockin', don't bother knockin'! (How many people can you fit in there, anyway?)

One regular person or two newlyweds.

I'd tell you all where we registered, but I'm much more interested in seeing what you come up with on your own.

Have you and Vella selected a squeaky president's head yet? I hope it's not Taft. Squeaky president Taft's head is harder to find than the limited-edition Sid Vicious Beanie Baby.

 

[sincerely_helene]

I've known you both now for well over a year
The two crazy lesbians who first welcomed me here
One was a blonde, cute and seemingly shy
The other a brunette with a tattoo on her thigh

Since that first moment, I've grown quite attached
And I can't think of two people more deserving
Or better matched

I was greeted with warmth, and humor, and wit
(Not to mention the occasional glimpse of a tit)
And for all of your kindness, I am eternally beholden
If friendships were showers, your's would be golden



Congratulations, Vella and Lucky
Sincerely Helene,
(oh, and also the duckies.)

 

[minsue]

If friendships were showers, your's would be golden

Am I the only one that really, really wants to see a Hallmark card with that sentiment now?

 

[shereads]

I've known you both now for well over a year
The two crazy lesbians who first welcomed me here
One was a blonde, cute and seemingly shy
The other a brunette with a tattoo on her thigh

Since that first moment, I've grown quite attached
And I can't think of two people more deserving
Or better matched

I was greeted with warmth, and humor, and wit
(Not to mention the occasional glimpse of a tit)
And for all of your kindness, I am eternally beholden
If friendships were showers, your's would be golden



Congratulations, Vella and Lucky
Sincerely Helene,
(oh, and also the duckies.)

They're lesbians?

 

[shereads]

Am I the only one that really, really wants to see a Hallmark card with that sentiment now?

Harlot.

 

[shereads]

~ Ode to Vella & the Luckster ~

Some will admire their pluck
And others will envy their luck
But none will disparage
The wisdom of marriage
Who know how these two love to sleep late on the weekends, and cuddle.

 

[Dar~]

I gave your poem a 1, becuase it all flowed so well until the end . . ,maybe you should go back to kindergarden.
-Anonymous

 

[Guest]

Ohmigod

Sher, youve outdone yourself.
a fabulous venue. one that couldnt be topped by the best topper...if you know what i mean.
I love all the gifts so far and im tickled pink... (flogged red) by all the poems ...golden showers not withstanding.... ROFLMAO
personally love the trailer. ive been saving up for tassled curtains this whole time. how did you know?!

 

[cloudy]

Sher, youve outdone yourself.
a fabulous venue. one that couldnt be topped by the best topper...if you know what i mean.
I love all the gifts so far and im tickled pink... (flogged red) by all the poems ...golden showers not withstanding.... ROFLMAO
personally love the trailer. ive been saving up for tassled curtains this whole time. how did you know?!

I have some old tires I picked out especially for your yard around that trailer. They're big ol' knobby ones! They'll be so purty with some flowers in 'em.



Oh! And there's this:

Oh I'm picking out a thermos for you
not an ordinary thermos for you
but the extra best thermos you can buy
with vinyl and stripes and a cup built right in

I'm picking out a thermos for you
and maybe a barometer too
and what else can I buy
so on me you'll rely
a rear end thermometer too

 

[SensualCealy]

Not that the two of you need anything to spice up your life, but as you get older you may need assistance when it comes to different possitions.

I hope you like it, since it's from Ikea it took me a hell of a long time to put the damn thing together! (you guys are so worth every minute of it!)

I cant top the poems so I wont even try.

To two Golden friends SALUTE!!!
Love ya both,
C

 

[shereads]

I hope you like it, since it's from Ikea it took me a hell of a long time to put the damn thing together! (you guys are so worth every minute of it!)

Are you sure that's a chair? I have a kitchen appliance like that.

Speaking of which...FONDUE POTS ARE BACK! Just in time for this wedding. Actually, they were back and now they're almost gone again, but that just means they're collectible.

 

[Guest]

Cloudster! i love that song. too funny. btw, could you toss in a few pink flamingos? i know they're hard to find but they would go fab with the tires. ive also been looking into half bathtubs that i can turn on its side for the mother mary statue. perfection!

Cealy, sweetie... im verklempt... i love that chair! you did a wonderful job finding it and i just know that itll go with everything in the house!

Sher, fondue pots? we would love one in avacado color, please. one can never have too many fondue pots or crock pots either.

 

[SensualCealy]

Vella, and Lucky, Im sure you could change the chair pad to fit what ever decor you have in the bedroom. This chair isn't to be put in the living area, just thought Id clarify that!
Here are some of the ways you can use it, sorry input Vella/ Lucky for the guy!

Enjoy!
C