Thanksgiving time

[omahaman2]

Thanksgiving is nearing !!
To all the wonderful playgrounders

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[Bridget69]

My Thanksgiving was last month.

 

[omahaman2]

My Thanksgiving was last month.

hope you had a good one,
to those celebrating next week

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[Cathleen]

The very same to you Oman and everyone celebrating next week.

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[CherryPop22]

Wow, I forgot it was only next week. Im glad im not cooking

 

[Arden]

I'm cooking for 12 this year, and I can hardly wait!

Wishing the happiest of holidays to You and Jenny... and everyone else at Lit!

 

[omahaman2]

Thanks everyone for the wishes!
I would like everyone to know
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You all have touched our lives in a special way!

 

[omahaman2]

http://www.chameleon-systems.com/ChewieNet/humor/Thanksgiving.jpg

 

[DLL]

This is the season that we find
Our hearts turning towards home
For I don’t count the many miles between us
Instead I count the many memories we have shared
And I look forward to the many memories
that we will share in our tomorrows
DLL

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!!!

Heres to loving families, good friends and true loves

 

[omahaman2]

SORRY ABOUT THIS!!

What key has legs and can't open doors?
A Turkey.


Gobbler said, "Doctor, help me! I can't stop acting like a turkey!"
"I see," said the doctor. "How long have you had this problem?"
"Let me think a second. Mom laid the egg in 1954..."


What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children?
If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
Pilgrims!

Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.

If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for?
Their AGE

Why can't you take a turkey to church?
Because they use such FOWL language

What are the feathers on a turkey's wings called?
Turkey feathers

What's the best dance to do on Thanksgiving?
The turkey trot

Can a turkey jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes - a building can't jump at all

What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus?
Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving

How can you make a turkey float?
You need 2 scoops of ice cream, some root beer, and a turkey

What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?
Plymouth Rock

Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?
The outside

Why did they let the turkey join the band?
Because he had the drumsticks

Why did the police arrest the turkey?
They suspected it of fowl play

What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner?
The turKEY

What did the turkey say before it was roasted?
Boy! I'm stuffed!

Where did the first corn come from?
The stalk brought it

Why did the Indian chief wear so many feathers?
To keep his wigwam

What happened to the Pilgrim who was shot at by an Indian?
He had an arrow escape

How did the Mayflower show that it liked America?
It hugged the shore

 

[69Muffin]

Wishing everyone here a very happy Thanksgiving.

This time of year is meant for reflecting on things that we have to be thankful for. I know that over the last year and a half I have realized that I have SO much to be thankful for and I wish the same to all of you.

http://a764.g.akamai.net/f/764/1052/1h/www.1800flowers.com/800f_assets/images/flowers/images/shop/catalog/1812z.jpg

 

[wtexcat]

I hope everyone has a Great Thanksgiving

But some birds may not

http://www.smilesr4u.com/thanksgiving.htm

 

[tonitits]

I hope everyone has a Great Thanksgiving

But some birds may not

http://www.smilesr4u.com/thanksgiving.htm

That's a great website. Thanks for posting it!

 

[tonitits]

I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving next week. For those that will not be with their families I hope you have someone that you can share it with and give thanks to all that we have. I am so thankful for all my wonderful friends I have met here. Thanks Oman for creating this thread for us to be able to say "Thank you" to all the great folks here.

(((((((((((Jenny and Oman)))))))))))) (((((((((((((Lit friends)))))))))))

 

[69Muffin]

A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious, and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music, and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary.

Finally, John was fed up, and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot
yelled back. John shook the parrot, and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, threw up his hands, grabbed the bird, and put him in the freezer.

For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."

John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, the bird continued, "May I ask what the turkey did?"

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

 

[Icey*Fire]

Tis Thanksgiving

My eyes viewed
The sea of Autumn
That lay before us,
And I pondered the hearts
Of the first Pilgrims.

Surely, they must have stopped
All their busys and chatter,
Their new adventures and clatter,
To give thanks for safety
And the magnificence
Of Autumn’s attire.

The crimson, golden glistening
Of the Cottonwoods and Aspens
Glow and shimmer
Their skirts of leaves
Before their last hurrah
And Winter’s barren slumber.

The golds, the reds, the yellows
As diamonds;
Wave this time of year,
As beautiful then, as now.

And the harvest,
So delicious;
As the season’s beauty.

Beauty all around
For all eyes to see, this majesty.
Beauty all around
As much as the sand upon the sea.
What perfect peace,
This Autumnal harmony.

And we give thanks
Upon America’s banks.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL!!!
Icey

 

[omahaman2]

http://www.andrewliu.com/Humor/Pictures/Pictures2/Thanksgiving.jpg

 

[omahaman2]

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[JennyOmanHill]

Turkey time again

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[omahaman2]

10 SIGNS THAT YOU WENT NUTS ON THANKSGIVING

1.Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the Lazy- Boy recliner.

2.Your after dinner moans are loud enough to signal Dr. Kevorkian.

3.You get grass stains on your butt after a walk, but never sat down.

4.Your " Big Elvis Super-Belt" won't even go around your waist.

5.You receive a Sumo Wrestler application in your e-mail.

6.You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday.

7.Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy.

8.That rash on your stomach turns out to be steering wheel burn.

9.Your wife wears a life jacket at night, in your water bed.

10.Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called twice.

 

[Darkknight2010]

10 SIGNS THAT YOU WENT NUTS ON THANKSGIVING

1.Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the Lazy- Boy recliner.

2.Your after dinner moans are loud enough to signal Dr. Kevorkian.

3.You get grass stains on your butt after a walk, but never sat down.

4.Your " Big Elvis Super-Belt" won't even go around your waist.

5.You receive a Sumo Wrestler application in your e-mail.

6.You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday.

7.Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy.

8.That rash on your stomach turns out to be steering wheel burn.

9.Your wife wears a life jacket at night, in your water bed.

10.Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called twice.

lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[omahaman2]

http://cards.webshots.com/resources2/4/5721.jpg

 

[omahaman2]

Top Ten Thanksgiving Turkey Pickup Lines

10. "Are those breasts real?"

9. "Wanna go back to my place and get sauced?"

8. "Have you lost weight or did they just start carving you already?"

7. "Fancy a pluck?"

6. "I did my share of flocking around when I was younger, but now it's time to settle down, not lose my head, and find a hen who wants me for more than my p*cker."

5. "It takes me four and a half hours to really get cookin'.'"

4. "Aren't you tired of being cooped up here?"

3. "Hey baby, wanna help me get the juice out of my baster?"

2. "PLEEEAAASSSEEE!! I'm honestly gonna die Thursday!"

And the number one turkey pick up line is !!

1. "Is that your pop-up timer, or are you just happy to see me?"

 

[omahaman2]

You Might Be A Redneck This Holiday If:

You've ever had Thanksgiving dinner on a Ping-Pong table.

Thanksgiving dinner is squirrel and dumplings.

You've ever re-used a paper plate.

If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Cool Whip on the side.

If you've ever used your ironing board as a buffet table.

Your turkey platter is an old hub cap.

Your best dishes have Dixie printed on them.

Your stuffing's secret ingredient comes from the bait shop.

Your only condiment on the dining room table is ketchup.

Side dishes include beef jerky and Moon Pies.

You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge.

The directions to your house include "turn off the paved road".

You consider pork and beans to be a gourmet food.

You have an Elvis Jell-o mold.

Your secret family recipe is illegal.

You serve Vienna Sausage as an appetizer.

 

[omahaman2]

Help Lines Hear Thanksgiving Horror Tales By BETSY TAYLOR, Associated Press Writer

ST. LOUIS - Concerned about cooking that Thanksgiving turkey? Just keep in mind that if you don't slice the bird with a chain saw, stomp on it to make it fit in a pan or lose it in a snowdrift, you'll already be doing better than some other Americans.

Cooks who have questions about how to prepare the seasonal feast have long been able to call help lines, offered by turkey producers, schools or others looking to provide assistance. But sometimes, the turkey traumas on Thanksgiving have even the experts stumped.

Mary Clingman serves as director of the Butterball Turkey Talk Line in Downers Grove, Ill. It expects to take more than 100,000 inquiries through Christmas.

Some past callers stand out.

"We got a call from a guy last year whose turkey wouldn't fit in his pan. He wrapped it in a towel and stomped on it until it did," Clingman said.

Another caller cut a turkey in half with a chain saw, then worried that oil on the saw might have transferred onto the turkey. A woman in Colorado who left her turkey outside to keep it frozen realized she couldn't find it when more snow fell.

And one phone call began: "You don't know anything about kitty litter, do you?" Clingman said a woman called after her husband poured kitty litter on the bottom of a new grill in hopes of absorbing drippings. Fortunately, the grill hadn't been lit yet, so the turkey was pulled off and cooked more conventionally, she said.

Kathy Bernard with the U.S. Department of Agriculture (news - web sites)'s Meat and Poultry Hotline in Beltsville, Md., said a caller last year wanted to make her bird inside a roasting bag, but didn't have one, so had improvised.

"She pulled a dry cleaning bag off her husband's suit, and it melted onto the bird," Bernard said.

Chris Whaley, a spokeswoman for Perdue in Salisbury, Md., said people should keep in mind that the Thanksgiving meal can be as simple or as complicated as they'd like it to be.

"I do believe it's reassuring to know not everyone's done it perfectly over the years," she said.