Isabella Thorne
Saucy Ambassador of Tarty Foreign Affairs
- Joined
- May 5, 2000
- Posts
- 3,084
THANKSGIVING LESSONS FROM A DOG FROM A DOG
1. Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joy ride.
2. Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.
3. When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
4. When it's in your best interest, always practice obedience.
5. Enjoy it when someone wants to rub your tummy.
6. Take naps and always stretch before rising.
7. Run, romp, and play daily.
8. Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.
9. Be loyal.
10. Never pretend to be something you're not.
11. If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
12. When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently.
13. Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
14. Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
15. Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
16. On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
17. When you are happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
18. No matter how often you are criticized, don't buy into the guilt thing and pout. Run right back and make friends.
THE TURKEY SHOT OUT OF THE OVEN
by Jack Prelutsky
The turkey shot out of the oven and rocketed into the air.
It knocked every plate off the table and partly demolished a chair.
It ricocheted into a corner and burst with a deafening boom,
then splattered all over the kitchen, completely obscuring the room.
It stuck to the walls and the windows, it totally coated the floor,
there was turkey attached to the ceiling, where there'd never been turkey before.
It blanketed every appliance, It smeared every saucer and bowl,
there wasn't a way I could stop it, that turkey was out of control.
I scraped and I scrubbed with displeasure, and thought with
chagrin as I mopped, that I'd never again stuff a turkey with popcorn that hadn't been popped.
TALKING TURKEY
What does a turkey say?
"Gobble, gobble, gobble?" ....... Not always!
What does ...
A jewelry-lovin' turkey:
"Bauble bauble bauble"
A dyslexic turkey say?
"Boggle Boggle Boggle"
A turkey in the shoe repair shop say?
"Cobble cobble cobble"
A turkey who was an old-time movie fan say?
"Gable, Gable, Gable!"
A turkey with a sore throat say?
"Gargle Gargle Gargle"
A turkey with a sore leg say?
"Hobble hobble hobble."
A football turkey say?
"Huddle, huddle, huddle"
A dieting turkey:
"Nibble, nibble nibble."
A one-legged Cockney turkey
"'Obble 'Obble 'Obble"
A turkey who argues a lot:
"Squabble squabble squabble."
What does Dr. Seuss' turkey say?
"Tweedle beetle paddle battle puddle wobble hobble gobble."
Then there was the dizzy Turkey who just went...
"Wobble Wobble Wobble!"
_________________________
If the President calls ...
get his name! lol
1. Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joy ride.
2. Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.
3. When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
4. When it's in your best interest, always practice obedience.
5. Enjoy it when someone wants to rub your tummy.
6. Take naps and always stretch before rising.
7. Run, romp, and play daily.
8. Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.
9. Be loyal.
10. Never pretend to be something you're not.
11. If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.
12. When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently.
13. Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
14. Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
15. Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.
16. On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.
17. When you are happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
18. No matter how often you are criticized, don't buy into the guilt thing and pout. Run right back and make friends.
THE TURKEY SHOT OUT OF THE OVEN
by Jack Prelutsky
The turkey shot out of the oven and rocketed into the air.
It knocked every plate off the table and partly demolished a chair.
It ricocheted into a corner and burst with a deafening boom,
then splattered all over the kitchen, completely obscuring the room.
It stuck to the walls and the windows, it totally coated the floor,
there was turkey attached to the ceiling, where there'd never been turkey before.
It blanketed every appliance, It smeared every saucer and bowl,
there wasn't a way I could stop it, that turkey was out of control.
I scraped and I scrubbed with displeasure, and thought with
chagrin as I mopped, that I'd never again stuff a turkey with popcorn that hadn't been popped.
TALKING TURKEY
What does a turkey say?
"Gobble, gobble, gobble?" ....... Not always!
What does ...
A jewelry-lovin' turkey:
"Bauble bauble bauble"
A dyslexic turkey say?
"Boggle Boggle Boggle"
A turkey in the shoe repair shop say?
"Cobble cobble cobble"
A turkey who was an old-time movie fan say?
"Gable, Gable, Gable!"
A turkey with a sore throat say?
"Gargle Gargle Gargle"
A turkey with a sore leg say?
"Hobble hobble hobble."
A football turkey say?
"Huddle, huddle, huddle"
A dieting turkey:
"Nibble, nibble nibble."
A one-legged Cockney turkey
"'Obble 'Obble 'Obble"
A turkey who argues a lot:
"Squabble squabble squabble."
What does Dr. Seuss' turkey say?
"Tweedle beetle paddle battle puddle wobble hobble gobble."
Then there was the dizzy Turkey who just went...
"Wobble Wobble Wobble!"
_________________________
If the President calls ...
get his name! lol
