Tell us the story of your worst sexual encounter.

[vrosej10]

There always seems to be tales of the good stuff on Literotica. How about we try to write about the worst most unsatisfying sexual experience we can think of or have ever had? Around 100 words should do it. Second hand tales of sexual woe are ok too.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Oh! Me!

Back in 1972 I had a neighbor who picked up a honey hitch-hiking on the Interstate. He brought her home. While he was in the bathroom applying deodorant and cologne, his honey shit on top of the bed-spread.

I had a buddy named Bruno. His ship docked in New York and he and a pal took liberty. They went to a tavern and met a couple of local gals. They bought them dinner, wined them, traded a little spit, and danced. Later the gals agreed to get a motel room with Bruno and friend.

So they get a cab and head for a motel. The friend and his date are rolling around the back seat; Bruno and his date are in the front with the cabbie. All of a sudden his friend yells BRUNO THIS BITCH HAS BALLS! Bruno checked his date, same problem. The cabbie slams on the brakes and the guys kick the gals out of the cab.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

Through a friend of a friend, I met a really smokin' hot guy, who kind of looked like Patrick Dempsey. After our party, he stayed over and things got intimate. All the while we were talking and fooling around, he kept asking me about my ex-boyfriend. It finally slipped out that the love of his life had cheated on him with my ex and then she blabbed about how big my ex's dick was. Apparently, this guy then had some obsession with finding out whether or not it was true. He was upfront and asked if I would give him my honest opinion. So, I fucked him and it was ultra boring. His dick wasn't bigger than my ex's, who was average at best. I told him the truth and sent him home. I called my ex, he came over and we had a good laugh about it.

I have actually had a lot of bad sexual encounters for all my whoring around. Only about one in three turned out to be exceptional.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I have actually had a lot of bad sexual encounters for all my whoring around. Only about one in three turned out to be exceptional.

Your odds go up when you switch to women, just saying...

There was one man who was so angelically beautiful that I kept trying again and again, hoping I could get him to last longer than 30 seconds... I heard he'd solved that problem later in life at least.

And there was the time I found myself in a cab with a very famous rock star, his very famous guitarist, and the guitarist's groupie of the night. My rocker kept making promises about all the wonderful things he was going to do to me at the hotel, but I had been watching him drink and down pills for two hours. I said; "I'm going to put you to sleep, baby!" and everyone went "oooh..." and yep, he dragged my clothes off, kissed me frantically as we fell into bed....

And then I wriggled out from under his passed-out ass and used his hotel phone to make some calls. I call it a half-notch on my gun. I don't know what he calls it!

 

[impressive]

It involved a "surprise" threesome. I didn't know a third had been invited. I didn't want a threesome at that moment, especially not with the person invited. Turned me off like a bucket of ice water on a campfire. So, the sex part never actually happened -- at least, not with me present.

Can't think of anything worse. Even the one I walked away from mid-fuck was better than that.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

My last two experiences went from bad to bad.

The first one, I had been making out with my girlfriend for hours. By the time we got to the sex I was so worked up I finished as I pushed inside her. I tried to keep going, but I was done. A slinked out the door crying a few minutes later. We broke up the next week

Then, twelve years later, I was out at the bar when one of the women I play poker with got drunk and started hitting on me like crazy. I drove her home, she invited me to bed, we made out, she passed out, woke up, made out, passed out, woke up, had sex, but I never finished. I was having blood pressure problems and could only get half hard, she was (and I do hate saying this as much as I love saying it) loose as a goose, so I didn't even know for sure I was in her at first, and then we switched from cowgirl to missionary and my back gave out. I never did finish. Then the sun came up, my mother called me a couple of times, she had to start working, and I left feeling great about getting laid for the first time in over a decade, but terrible about being the worst sex I ever had, and the second worst I ever gave.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

Your odds go up when you switch to women, just saying...

For the record, I was only talking about straight sex. Come to think of it, I've never had a bad encounter of the lesbian kind. Getting into girls' pants was sometimes more work than I had the attention span for. Otherwise, smooth sailing.

 

[ericahope]

Come to think of it, I've never had a bad encounter of the lesbian kind.

Is there such a thing as bad gal/gal sex? I'm not that experienced in the matter, but I've never had a bad experience with another woman.

Erica

 

[impressive]

Is there such a thing as bad gal/gal sex?

Yes. Have had a couple girl encounters that you could not PAY me to repeat. Most, however, are overwhelmingly yummy.

 

[lesbiaphrodite]

Yes, you can definitely have a bad lesbian experience. I've had a few of them and was revolted. However, as Impressive rightly points out, the overwhelming majority have been positively incredible...mouth-watering.

 

[TE999]

I was home on leave and a bud of mine set me up with a cute little thing that was (according to him) hot to trot. Perfect. I didn't have a place with any privacy...and neither did she...so after a nice dinner, we parked on a dirt road in the boonies, jumped in the back seat and commenced to arouse each other. It was late summer in Florida...hot and humid...soon we were naked and sweating...quickly becoming the wrong kind of hot...rolled down the windows and became a mosquito buffet...rolled up the windows...and it's a sauna again...at 10:00 at night no less...we fucked and scratched, scratched and fucked until we both got off...then got dressed and attempted to leave...the car's stuck. Two hours later we were incredibly mosquito bit, but finally got it free and I took her home. We exchanged letters for a while...then tapered off...and quit. I heard she married a guy who drove a Pepsi delivery truck. I hope she's happy.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Is there such a thing as bad gal/gal sex? I'm not that experienced in the matter, but I've never had a bad experience with another woman.

Erica

I'm pretty sure I was not the best lay for at least one girl in my time... I've tried to make up for it since then though.

And I am sure that some guy will tell a story about his worst lay and it will turn out to be me, because honestly, we all have our lesser moments. Right?

 

[The_Fool]

Yes. Have had a couple girl encounters that you could not PAY me to repeat. Most, however, are overwhelmingly yummy.

You said you'd never tell. Wait...you said girl encounters. My Bad....

 

[Safe_Bet]

I've been pondering this all day and I have to honestly say that I have NEVER had bad sex. The worst was great and the best, I barely remember anything after losing my voice from the screaming. I asked Amy and she said almost the same thing (course she had BETTER have said that... or else! )

 

[TE999]

I've been pondering this all day and I have to honestly say that I have NEVER had bad sex. The worst was great and the best, I barely remember anything after losing my voice from the screaming. I asked Amy and she said almost the same thing (course she had BETTER have said that... or else! )

That's why all the cool girls are lesbians, right?

 

[SimonBrooke]

Yes. Have had a couple girl encounters that you could not PAY me to repeat. Most, however, are overwhelmingly yummy.

You know, speaking as a straight male, I've never worked out why any of you ever bother with any of us. Mind you, I'm very glad you do.

 

[impressive]

You know, speaking as a straight male, I've never worked out why any of you ever bother with any of us. Mind you, I'm very glad you do.

I haven't figured it out, either. Heaven knows, no chick ever left my bathroom toilet seat up.

 

[SeaCat]

Worst Sexual Experience?

I can't think of any that were bad although I can think of some that were strange.

The strangest would have to be a young lady I hooked up with in college. We had talked a bit and seemed to feel the same about things. She was a tiny thing with short spiky hair and almost no tits. Right up my alley. Tasty would be a great way to describe her. She did have some strange ideas for me though, she seemed to like it when I grabbed her hard.

Then I went over to her place one night. The plans were for me to spend the night and I was looking forward to this. I had never been in her place. We had dinner and then hit the pool. She looked damned good in a bikini. (We changed in seperate rooms, her idea.) When we got back from the pool we had a beer or two then started playing. She started pulling out toys even as she insisted on keeping herself covered up. Some of those toys were kind of surprising to me. (Whips and such.) She wanted to have sex and wanted me to use some of those toys on her even as she insisted on keeping her body covered. I couldn't understand this and sat her down and started talking with her.

It turned out that this was what she was used to. Her first boyfriend had gotten her into this and this was all she knew. Too bad for me I'm not the violent kind towards the opposite sex. She told me she couldn't get off without being whipped and beaten.

I liked her I truly liked her and I didn't want to lose her. I also didn't like the idea that all she knew was violence against her. Then I got an idea. I would introduce her to my style while letting her feel things were normal for her, at least at first.

I turned to her and told her in my sternest voice that I was going to have fun using her body. I ordered her to strip and told her I was going to make her scream. When she was nude I ordered her to lay on the bed on her belly and stretch her arms above her head. She did as she was told.

I started the fun by giving her a massage with hot scented oil from head to toes. I followed my hands with my tongue and lips. When I had finished her back I rolled her over and did the same on her front. I didn't miss a bit of her skin with either my hands, fingers of tongue and lips. When I had reached hr toes she was quivering and when she felt y lips and tongue moving up her legs again she started twitching.

I spent more time giving her oral sex than you would believe. I was true to my words though, I made her scream more than a couple of times. Never once did I use one of her violent toys on her, hell the only things I used on her that night were parts of my body.

We never did sleep that night.

Cat

 

[Safe_Bet]

That's why all the cool girls are lesbians, right?

<----- ......... Why yes. As a matter of fact they are!

I haven't figured it out, either. Heaven knows, no chick ever left my bathroom toilet seat up.

Amy does...

(cuz she spits her toothpaste into the toilet instead of the sink, not the OTHER "guy" reason )

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Having spent my whole life monogamous, I am not about to say anything bad about the sex we've shared. Still, I've got to believe that the worst day's sex is better than the best day at work.

 

[ms.read]

to share common pleasure can be no bad thing, eh? so, i can only say when the cock falls out flaccid and spent against his thigh, is the only dissapointment that it could not stay in the warm moist built in hidey hole that I have, forever.

 

[Nirvanadragones]

Is there such a thing as bad gal/gal sex? I'm not that experienced in the matter, but I've never had a bad experience with another woman.

Erica

Definitely. But most of mine involve getting hurt. There was that time I needed stitches because she threw me onto a rock at the beach. I still have the scars.

I think the worst ever was being caught in a public place. It involved a Michael Jackson concert and the police

 

[Firebrain]

I've never really had 'bad' sex, but if we're allowed to talk about friends...my friend was going at it cowgirl style and vomited on him. Never go on a dinner date with norovirus!

 

[Safe_Bet]

Definitely. But most of mine involve getting hurt. There was that time I needed stitches because she threw me onto a rock at the beach. I still have the scars.

I think the worst ever was being caught in a public place. It involved a Michael Jackson concert and the police

*Snerk* That is wrong on SO many levels...

 

[DesertPirate]

I think the worst ever was being caught in a public place. It involved a Michael Jackson concert and the police

If that isn't a plot bunny?
You need to write that one!