Tangents

[poppy1963]

Do you ever misinterpret some small statement...and go off on a tangent with those you love, or care about, or at least, respect? Sometimes I jump to such conclusions! I've done this and I probably will again. Hard as I try to forgive real/perceived affronts...sometimes I kid myself.

How different from most am I on this? I need to hear it...and/or ways to help not do it again!

 

[Woodmiester]

Put yourself in the other shoe as it were. As one that tries to say one thing but the choice of words that end up being used so many times became switched and or misunderstood and at times it can ruin a beautiful event or relationship.
Sometimes it's best to ask just what a person means if something doesn't sound right or if it's on the fence of making you upset so before you go off you can be sure the intent of the words and not just what you might have thought you heard.

Now if I can just take my own advice

 

[poppy1963]

Put yourself in the other shoe as it were. As one that tries to say one thing but the choice of words that end up being used so many times became switched and or misunderstood and at times it can ruin a beautiful event or relationship.
Sometimes it's best to ask just what a person means if something doesn't sound right or if it's on the fence of making you upset so before you go off you can be sure the intent of the words and not just what you might have thought you heard.

Now if I can just take my own advice

Wise words....perhaps we both can take such advice more often...if not perfectly!



I hate when I do that...don't you?

 

[Woodmiester]

I hate when I do that...don't you?

Do what? Go off on a tangent? Not usually because of words unless their said to push my buttons and they work. If that wasn't the question please excuse me as the last few months have been hell and my thinking isn't up to par.

 

[poppy1963]

Do what? Go off on a tangent? Not usually because of words unless their said to push my buttons and they work. If that wasn't the question please excuse me as the last few months have been hell and my thinking isn't up to par.

It's ok...I understand. My last few....several........years have...been hell on and off.

I hate when I go off on tangents needlessly...because I didn't take the time to do as your advice suggests. Sounded like you understood that...perhaps you have yet more insights? Please tell me! I'd love to hear all ideas!

 

[Woodmiester]

My insights? Ha, if you knew my life at the moment you'd see any insights I thought I had that were worth knowing are actually not worth a shit.

One thing I just realized the other day and not sure why it's taken so long and taken something so bad to happen for me to realize it is ones self pride.
Be it a job, a friendship or a marriage, if it's going to stand a chance I now see that being so stuipdly proud that you keep something you know is or might be impotant form the other to keep from feeling doubt within yourself, like a loser or just smaller in their eyes is not just wrong but damaging. Like a lie almost it's going to come out sooner or later and when it does it's just as bad as a serious lie and how can one understand being lied to, the loss of that trust, the bond, it's just not worth it.

 

[poppy1963]

My insights? Ha, if you knew my life at the moment you'd see any insights I thought I had that were worth knowing are actually not worth a shit.

One thing I just realized the other day and not sure why it's taken so long and taken something so bad to happen for me to realize it is ones self pride.
Be it a job, a friendship or a marriage, if it's going to stand a chance I now see that being so stuipdly proud that you keep something you know is or might be impotant form the other to keep from feeling doubt within yourself, like a loser or just smaller in their eyes is not just wrong but damaging. Like a lie almost it's going to come out sooner or later and when it does it's just as bad as a serious lie and how can one understand being lied to, the loss of that trust, the bond, it's just not worth it.

Woodmeister...one thing I know for certain. No one learns in good times such lessons...we learn only in the hard times the most important things...and I don't believe for a moment that all your insights are worthless.

I don't equate such with purposeful lie...it's something different.