Taking advantage of RL (writerly)

[gauchecritic]

As is my often wont, this afternoon I came up with a speech about a situation I found myself in. Ok I was day dreaming. You know, when you think of what you should have said instead of bursting into tears or storming out (for macho types read punch in the face or lay a cricket bat upside their head) What you should have said. What they say in films and plays.
The French have a phrase for it (as they often do) arrière d'escaliers or possibly idée arrière d'escaliers or something like that, the back stairs idea. But that's beside the point.

I was inventing a speech to do with personal loss and half way through I thought; No. I'm never going to use that in a story because it shows rather more of my inner self than I'm comfortable with.

Then I thought; If I'd thought of something hilariously funny which was equally soul baring or intimate I wouldn't have the faintest hesitation about telling everybody in ear shot.

Where do you draw your line?

 

[kendo1]

As is my often wont, this afternoon I came up with a speech about a situation I found myself in. Ok I was day dreaming. You know, when you think of what you should have said instead of bursting into tears or storming out (for macho types read punch in the face or lay a cricket bat upside their head) What you should have said. What they say in films and plays.
The French have a phrase for it (as they often do) [/i]arrière d'escaliers[/i] or possibly idée arrière d'escaliers or something like that, the back stairs idea. But that's beside the point.

I was inventing a speech to do with personal loss and half way through I thought; No. I'm never going to use that in a story because it shows rather more of my inner self than I'm comfortable with.

Then I thought; If I'd thought of something hilariously funny which was equally soul baring or intimate I wouldn't have the faintest hesitation about telling everybody in ear shot.

Where do you draw your line?

The English language has a word for that too- hindsight.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I think laughing at yourself is healthy and appealing to most people.

 

[elsol]

I was inventing a speech to do with personal loss and half way through I thought; No. I'm never going to use that in a story because it shows rather more of my inner self than I'm comfortable with.

Then I thought; If I'd thought of something hilariously funny which was equally soul baring or intimate I wouldn't have the faintest hesitation about telling everybody in ear shot.

Where do you draw your line?

*shrug*

With a few stories, I didn't realize I was talking about myself until after I finished writing it... and since I post serially on storiesonline it was already out there.

Even if I hadn't, I would have posted it.

I think a writer puts a piece of him/herself into a story and that's the part the reader recognizes and accepts as being about them (the reader). The deeper you go with yourself, the deeper you can take some readers.

Yes, we're unique... but we've all had some very similar experiences (like unrequited crushes.)

 

[jomar]

Loss issues are far more personal and private.

I can't say I've drawn a line yet, since the anonymity allows freedom to explore subjects (porn and such) that would otherwise be difficult or awkward.

Elsol makes a good point that we draw on our experiences in writing, most of which are universal.

 

[Katyusha]

As is my often wont, this afternoon I came up with a speech about a situation I found myself in. Ok I was day dreaming. You know, when you think of what you should have said instead of bursting into tears or storming out (for macho types read punch in the face or lay a cricket bat upside their head) What you should have said. What they say in films and plays.
The French have a phrase for it (as they often do) arrière d'escaliers or possibly idée arrière d'escaliers or something like that, the back stairs idea. But that's beside the point.

I was inventing a speech to do with personal loss and half way through I thought; No. I'm never going to use that in a story because it shows rather more of my inner self than I'm comfortable with.

Then I thought; If I'd thought of something hilariously funny which was equally soul baring or intimate I wouldn't have the faintest hesitation about telling everybody in ear shot.

Where do you draw your line?

It depends on how much of myself is already revealed in the story. I don't mind sharing even really deep, dark snippets in each story, but when I feel like a part of the plot is just describing my whole life, either as it is now or as it was when I was growing up or whatever, that's where I draw the line.

And making it hilariously funny has nothing to do with it for me...my sense of humor was amputated when I was a teenager.

 

[CeriseNoire]

As is my often wont, this afternoon I came up with a speech about a situation I found myself in. Ok I was day dreaming. You know, when you think of what you should have said instead of bursting into tears or storming out (for macho types read punch in the face or lay a cricket bat upside their head) What you should have said. What they say in films and plays.
The French have a phrase for it (as they often do) arrière d'escaliers or possibly idée arrière d'escaliers or something like that, the back stairs idea. But that's beside the point.

I was inventing a speech to do with personal loss and half way through I thought; No. I'm never going to use that in a story because it shows rather more of my inner self than I'm comfortable with.

Then I thought; If I'd thought of something hilariously funny which was equally soul baring or intimate I wouldn't have the faintest hesitation about telling everybody in ear shot.

Where do you draw your line?

The expression is "l'esprit d'escaliers"; pretty much 'staircase wit'. As I recall, they used to say it was Diderot or maybe Voltaire who coined the term. Can't quite remember.

Anyway, as to where I draw the line, for me, it's wherever I either can't even bear to write the words, or when the thought of anyone reading it makes me more nervous than being naked in public (I am not an exhibitionist).

 

[MagicaPractica]

I struggled with that when I was writing my essays for Lit the past couple months. I got quite personal with them. I know there were a few things I left out because I didn't want to share that, but I put a lot out there. My line was very moveable and based on my gut. Could I stand for people to know that about me? Was it too personal? Might it help someone else? Of course, those were personal essays, not a story. I think I'm willing to put more into a story because I can assign it to the character.

 

[cantdog]

I name no names, first of all, The line is far short of that.

Let me see. No, I guess I don't worry about it as much as I ought. I'll say almost anything, if it is an example illustrating a wisdom. If it serves no function of that sort, then no. But if it points a lesson, I'm there. This is what made me so forthcoming on the AH, here. I am, of course, somewhat insulated, because personal anecdotes bore the living shit out of everyone. So I know I shall lose some audience once I start in doing that.

Because of that effect, I tend to edit them out of stories, though. In conversation, or on the Lit boards, a revealing personal story I can let stand, whereas in a story, I am more concerned with losing my audience. I have often-- no, really, often-- foregone a very nice point to make, because the anecdote would bore them. But! Only in stories. As the readers of my posts know all too well.

 

[scriptordelecto]

I think I show a great deal of my inner-self in my writing. I tend to draw my characters' emotional responses from my own, and that tends to lend them a realism (I hope) that I couldn't give them otherwise. If that gets the reader to invest more into identifying with the character, then its worth the cost of exposing pieces of my soul.

 

[bluebell]

Oddly, my line sort of starts wherever I believe I don't deserve something in real life. That is, if I'm writing something either based entirely on myself (a sort of essay, as Magica talked about), or something fictional with an aspect of myself or my life heavily involved.
If it seems ridiculous that I should have an aspiration for, I don't know, some kind of sweet and wild love, I might have a difficult time bestowing that gift on a character. I'd want to, but it could be a dangerous thing. There might be inferiority fronting as realism.

Although all that might be a bit deeper than I'd even let myself get. I normally assume I'll be bothering someone if I say/write too much, so I don't always. Which sometimes earns me sound scoldings. The flip side of that is sharing something and then worrying about it, or possibly regretting it to the point of taking it back altogether.
I annoy myself.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

When I write my criminal material I always use dialogue and events from real life. The real stuff is always stranger than anything I can imagine.

 

[McKenna]

When I'm writing, I feel like I'm picking and choosing which parts of myself to share, some good, some bad, some embarrassing, some funny, some heart-rendering. it's like creating a painting rather than snapping a photo. Is one any less real than the other?

Possibly.

I draw the line at sharing things that would potentially hurt those I care about. I draw the line at sharing things that are not socially acceptable. I draw the line at sharing anything that makes me feel too exposed to an audience with which I'm not intimate. I don't feel like it's any less "me". In fact, it might be a more beautiful version of me. I'm not very photogenic.

 

[Stella_Omega]

A young friend of mine is an aspiring cartoonist, and she was asked to submit an entrance essay in the form of a comic-- featuring herself, a robot, and a snowman. As she was brainstorming, one of her ideas was that she'd build the snowman out of crumpled sketches that she's rejected. She decided against it because she felt that was too personal...

I do have a couple of stories written that I won't share. You wouldn't think it, would you?

 

[sr71plt]

I'm probably no help. It took me more than a day to figure out what "RL" meant.

 

[shereads]

Maybe that's where literature comes from: writing the kind of pain that's almost unbearable to write.

 

[Guest]

Maybe that's where literature comes from: writing the kind of pain that's almost unbearable to write.

I've written a short story that deals with the loss of my brother.

I wrote a great deal during that time, journal-type things, countless emails- It almost seemed to me that writing things down made the situation somehow not real. It kept me sane. I guess.

So now I have this story about death, a true story, intimately detailed, but that to me seems almost surreal. The few Lit folks I sent it to aren't certain I should post it. Too achingly personal, was one friend's comment.

The fact that I haven't pursued posting or publishing for it probably means I wouldn't be comfortable to see those words read by just anyone.

Maybe that is my line after all.

 

[sr71plt]

Ummm. OK, I'll play too. I have a story here about the loss (death) of a lover that cuts about as close to the quick as possible.

And also one on the reawakening to a new lover.