Sydney (Australia) slip ups

SydneyScorpio

Really Experienced
Joined
Nov 2, 2007
Posts
297
A few years ago, I was going out with a younger woman who had been seriously abused as a child and, later, was sexually abused by a sadistic husband. Needless to say, we enjoyed very vanilla sex, as she wasn't very happy about trying out different things due to her previous experiences.

After a long night of drinking, we ended up back at my place where we engaged in a long session involving missionary and cowboy. I had to go to the bathroom and, when I came back to the bedroom I noticed that she was lying facedown with her legs spread wide. She said she was airing out the playground and resting her legs. I just climbed up behind her and, grabbing her little hips, I got her to raise her backside so we could try a little bit of doggy-style - her favourite position.

Unfortunately, due to being very intoxicated still, and, not being able to see very well in the dark, I entered the wrong passage. This fact would have been obvious by the tighter sensation as I plunged all the way in but, she bucked and threw me off immediately. The end result was that as I was thrown off her, I struck my head on the bedside table and ended up on the floor with blood streaming down my face and a very angry girlfriend screaming at me from the bed.

It was hard to explain to everyone how I had ended up with 12 stitches in my forehead when all our friends knew that we had been home all night after the party. Very embarassing!

Anyone else had any nasty experiences during their sexual escapades? I can't be the only one who has suffered an injury on the job. :eek:
 
Missing Protection

While making loving to a tiny little woman one night, we discovered, much to her horror, that the condom I had been wearing had come off at some point. Having searched the bed, and her pussy, we couldn't find it anywhere. We searched for about an hour and just couldn't find it. Total confusion!

Two days later, her gynaecologist pulls out this split, limp piece of prophylactic whilst giving her the usual indepth examination. Go from total confusion directly to absolute embarassment. This was a women who wouldn't even have sex on the night before her doctors' visit for fear that he would know that she'd been having sex.

Ladies, why is it that you never see any female gynaecologists? It always seems to be men, doesn't it? :confused:
 
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