Switch and switch relationship?

[darkestofdreams]

I am kind of new to bdsm, I've taken an interest in the past but I'm currently in a relationship where me and my partner are both interested in Dom/sub. There are a few details however that make it a bit more complex than simply Dom/sub. We are both extremely possessive of each other and love owning each other. We fully submit to each other in a very unique way. She is very attracted to be Dom, while I've always secretly wanted to be submissive to a powerful woman. However our roles do tend to switch, a sort of power struggle. And it is a big turn on to both of us. We both have the tendencies to behave as a sub, willing to obey and pleasure the other at command, to let the other take control and do as they want. We trust each other entirely and both receive immense pleasure in being in control and being controlled. In a way feels like a sort of game. I love when she takes control, and I feel like the times I take control of her only inspire her to be a better Dom. Maybe what I'm talking about isn't D/s at all but I haven't been able to find any explanation on this kind of relationship. I feel like maybe she is a little more inclined towards Dom and me a little more towards sub, but it would feel so terrible if we weren't able to switch the roles occasionally because we both also enjoy the switching very much. Does anyone have any advice, comment? Am I disgracing something sacred, is this an unusual situation?

 

[SpunThings]

I am kind of new to bdsm, I've taken an interest in the past but I'm currently in a relationship where me and my partner are both interested in Dom/sub. There are a few details however that make it a bit more complex than simply Dom/sub. We are both extremely possessive of each other and love owning each other. We fully submit to each other in a very unique way. She is very attracted to be Dom, while I've always secretly wanted to be submissive to a powerful woman. However our roles do tend to switch, a sort of power struggle. And it is a big turn on to both of us. We both have the tendencies to behave as a sub, willing to obey and pleasure the other at command, to let the other take control and do as they want. We trust each other entirely and both receive immense pleasure in being in control and being controlled. In a way feels like a sort of game. I love when she takes control, and I feel like the times I take control of her only inspire her to be a better Dom. Maybe what I'm talking about isn't D/s at all but I haven't been able to find any explanation on this kind of relationship. I feel like maybe she is a little more inclined towards Dom and me a little more towards sub, but it would feel so terrible if we weren't able to switch the roles occasionally because we both also enjoy the switching very much. Does anyone have any advice, comment? Am I disgracing something sacred, is this an unusual situation?

Oh my god if it isn't broke, don't fix it. Why would you care what some strangers think about your relationship.

There will be people who tell you that you're wrong. There are always people into BDSM who think there's only one true way. Ignore those people. Do what works for you and your partner.

 

[SpunThings]

It's not unusual, but I don't have any experience with this. Hopefully someone reading this can chime in with related experience.

 

[MistressBlaze]

I was lucky. being a switch myself I connected with another switch and our play time was some of the most erotic ever. sometimes I would be dom other times he would. My favorite times and the most satisfying, happened when we would fluidly switch rolls back and forth during sex. We had this amazing connection that allowed us to play off each other and intuitively know when to switch. Sadly we have since parted ways and i do miss out times together . My advice to you would be to just enjoy your switching, it can be mind-blowing.

 

[MasterGrimoir]

I'm with SpunThings on this one, if it ain't broke don't fix it, remember, "the ancient Chinese philosopher Confusing, he say; 'the one true way is an eightfold path'."

 

[FknNemesis]

Don't let your intimate life, experiences be taken over by guidelines or try to fit in with labels.

The [oldschool hardcore IT nerd] mantra 'if it ain't broke, you ain't fixed it enough' doesn't apply here. Seems both of you are enjoying things are they are, grow...



... enjoy it. Don't question whether it fits how others would live things.

 

[subsarah]

Jealous

I agree with everyone else. If you both enjoy both sides and can trade off that's awesome. We both want to be submissive and gravitate for toward submissive more than either of you. The Dom role does not come naturally. Just enjoy!

 

[Netzach]

When I do "go there" it's with this one person who's really fluid, responsive, knows me incredibly well, and can turn on a dime when I do. Technically I'm the one in control, because that's just who I am at the end of the day, sexually, but spontaneous ideas about fun and the way they change are a huge part of the appeal in that relationship. Don't sweat this one, really don't.

 

[Sapphire_Orchid]

If your situation works, then it works. It actually sounds like a wonderful little thing you have going. Don't change it because some other people out there might possibly have a problem with it. It's none of anyone's business but yours and your significant other's. Have fun.