swapping gf advice wanted

[youngrabbit]

I'm looking for a bit of advice. Me and my mate were discussing how hot each others girlfriends are over a few beers one night and as the conversation went on decided we'd like to have some fun either swapping or as a group. I think my gf would be 50/50 but im too scared to mention it and he is the same.

We have been flirting with each others girlfriends for weeks now with positive responses and making situations where we are alone with the others partner.

Last week I went shopping then to the cinema with my friends gf and she was very flirty, so much so i thought something might happen.

Whats the next step?

 

[youngrabbit]

I just want to also mention we are all very happy in our relationships

 

[subwannabe]

Maybe you two are very happy but the girls could be a different story. It sounds to me like there is a very real possibility that you could each get laid by the other's girlfriends. It could also be laying the foundation for at least one of you breaking up eventually. Maybe the best way to go would be to all talk about a group thing.

 

[ReadyOne]

This can be lots of fun if both couples are secure in their relationship and agree beforehand that the encounter is for recreational sex.

Before it happens, each couple has to talk. If you aren't able to talk to your mate, then your relationship may not be secure enough; i.e. you don't truly fully trust each other.

You can approach the conversation slowly and indirectly. Ask if your partner has noticed all the flirting. Affirm your loyalty and express how good it feels that another is willing to flirt.

(The old expression, "flattery will get you no where, but keep on trying!", expresses how you can desire and enjoy something and yet still be strong.)

If you get similar feedback from your mate, then ask them what they think it might be like if the flirting were allowed to actually lead to kissing or petting. Remind them you aren't making a proposal, just exploring your feelings together. Be brave and honest, and you will probably be pleasantly surprised!

I'd first bring up the subject in bed, and if things went well, I'd bring it up again another day when things can be seriously discussed.

Encourage your buddy to have the same talk with his mate and compare notes. May a good time await you all!

 

[expressiveness]

Yeah, the next step should really be to draw your gf more into this, by pillow talk or something. Make sure not to represent it to her as if you want to cheat on her with her friend and your friend wants to cheat with her, but really make it a group thing: just fun and openness, without there being any competition between your gf and her friend.

 

[ms_sub_liminal]

stop going on dates with the other's gf or you're aiming for a breakup. you need to sit down and talk to your respecting SO's about the idea of swapping or grouping before you dig yourself into too deep a hole.

 

[silverwhisper]

honestly, i'd suggest pointing them at this thread.

ed

 

[RandomAssGuy]

honestly, i'd suggest pointing them at this thread.

ed

Or bring em to this site in general and talk about some threads together and get to this one and see what she says when you joke about it? If she's iffy bring it up again later in a joking type of way and see how it goes then.

 

[saudades]

Communication is key, honestly. If you don't communicate with her it might turn out horribly. I speak from personal experience.

 

[VelvetDarkness]

Be careful of how much flirting you do before you reveal your true agenda. You don't want these women to feel manipulated or deceived and turn on you.

Do you think you or your mate's gf have any interest in bisexuality? If you want to succeed with this scheme you have to consider what's in it for them. As an opening gambit, 'Me and my mate were having a few beers and decided we'd like to fuck each other's women, whaddaya say?' is likely to render you both instantly single. Open relationships only really work when they are strong to start with so ask yourself if both relationships are likely to weather an experience like this.

Also, this guy is your friend and you'll be risking that friendship if you proceed. If the girls are good friends they'll also be risking that friendship. What will the ground rules be? Will you only swing as a foursome or will all four of you have free reign to have sex with each other whenever you like? What protection will you use? Have you all a recent STD check? How will you handle things if a pregnancy occurs?

I may sound like a killjoy but you'll have more success in persuading your gf to do this if you can demonstrate you've thought things through and have her welfare in mind.

If you don't know whether she's bi curious, I'd suggest talking about that with her first. If she responds positively, maybe ask her what kind of women she finds attractive and maybe cite your mate's gf as an example. From there you can lead her into the idea of playing with the other couple and hopefully not get your bollocks kicked. If she likes the idea as a fantasy, talk about it while you have sex together and get her to imagine what it might be like and describe what she'd like to do. Offering her new experiences like bisexuality might get you further than suggesting a straight swap.

If she doesn't run with the idea, I really don't know what to suggest. You can't force her into it and coercion of any kind would have disastrous consequences for your relationship. She has a perfect right not to be interested so don't get sulky and resentful if she says no. Being a man about it and accepting her decision might make her more open to the idea once she's had longer to consider it.

At the end of the day, the worst she can do is say no. Be careful of exhibiting too much interest in your mate's gf though or jealousy will develop. If she sees the whole thing as a thinly veiled excuse for you to get your hands on your mate's woman (even if it is), she's unlikely to warm to the idea.

 

[silverwhisper]

[bump]

youngrabbit, what did you decide on?

ed

 

[tisen]

just try the group thing, maybe one of the couples just watching you and u'r girlfriend having sex

 

[youngrabbit]

[bump]

youngrabbit, what did you decide on?

ed

A little while ago me my gf and the couple in question had some fun after a night out watchin some porn for laughs back at mine. We swapped partners in front of each other for kissing and masterbation only, its a good start! and the great news is no one was embarrased the next day and talked about it openly

Hopefuly more good times are to come!

I can not begin to describe how horny the whole thing got me or still does when i think about it

 

[TypicalDeviant]

Congrats! I hope it continues to go well, and don't forget to tell us more!

 

[we_reach_for_stars]

tricky, tricky

gosh, for starters, you should encourage them (the two gals) to spend time together. Buy beer or their choice of drink. Both you and your buddy should invite friends that don't really know either of your gals well (they will feel more comfortable letting loose infront of people they don't know) so they don't get too suspiciuous as to your intentions, since she could turn it around on you quick and call you a selfish pig.

See if they get touchy with each other after a beer or two. If they do, you should later comment on this and say you thought it was friggn hot. She'll probably get the idea. hope it all goes well.

 

[youngrabbit]

We are going camping this weekend!

 

[scottmunger]

Hot scenario. Reading through it, I was gonna ask if you really liked (love?) your partner? Or are you just wanting to get your rocks off with some new pussy?

 

[youngrabbit]

I love my partner 100% no doubt about that, I just want to do certain things in the bedroom (or out of it) that involve other people. If my GF isnt enjoying doing this stuff then I wouldn't be