Stupid things people have said to you.

[Jada59]

Once, my ex was really mad at me and shouted, "You pants face loser!"

I'm not sure what it was he intended to say but my daughter and I laughed so hard that it pissed him off even more. He walked off with clenched fists and a red face.

 

[Apisto42]

“Apisto! You’re like bacon on a cheeseburger, making everything better!”

Said recently by an asshole who is full of shit always. God bless him...

 

[Jada59]

“Apisto! You’re like bacon on a cheeseburger, making everything better!”

Said recently by an asshole who is full of shit always. God bless him...

Hehe.

 

[Leigh81]

Lots of things in the dog world from uneducated people, like docked tails, cropped ears, prong collars, dog shows............................................

 

[Esslemont]

AFTER I’ve spilled coffee on my hand...

Be careful, that’s hot.

.....Thanks Captain Obvious.

 

[Esslemont]

Lots of things in the dog world from uneducated people, like docked tails, cropped ears, prong collars, dog shows............................................

Lmfao...I approve of this post.

 

[dashie33]

AFTER I’ve spilled coffee on my hand...

Be careful, that’s hot.

.....Thanks Captain Obvious.

Also: "Mind your head," after you've already bumped it.

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

How do you make honey?

 

[Taegul]

When a cop asks me, "Do you know how fast you were going?"

"Actually sir, no, my speedometer only goes to 160 and the needle was pegged two inches past that."

 

[DDBustyBrit]

“Are you Australian?”

My standard answer...

“No! That’s where we sent our convicts!”

*Apologies to my Aussie brethren

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

“Are you Australian?”

My standard answer...

“No! That’s where we sent our convicts!”

*Apologies to my Aussie brethren

We send our convicts to Washington DC.

 

[DDBustyBrit]

We send our convicts to Washington DC.

no kidding

Another.....

“This shouldn’t hurt”

As they mash my DD’s down to an A for a mammogram!! Right sure

 

[Knoturnal]

How do you make honey?

get some bees, they will help

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

no kidding

Another.....

“This shouldn’t hurt”

As they mash my DD’s down to an A for a mammogram!! Right sure

Yes. The operative word here being "shouldn't"

 

[Billsexpot]

“You should shave your beard, just to see”

 

[Jada59]

AFTER I’ve spilled coffee on my hand...

Be careful, that’s hot.

.....Thanks Captain Obvious.

Ha!

 

[Jada59]

Also: "Mind your head," after you've already bumped it.

Yep!

 

[Jada59]

How do you make honey?

Hahaha.

 

[Jada59]

no kidding

Another.....

“This shouldn’t hurt”

As they mash my DD’s down to an A for a mammogram!! Right sure

I once had a tech tell me that my breasts were too big. I'm a C cup!

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

"There's always hope"

Said by a supplier in a meeting after we proved that his own numbers showed delivery would be six weeks later than the "drop dead" date and there was no way to improve that.

 

[LikeableMe]

A manager in a job I started a few years ago. She only issued four hour shifts, and said we wouldn’t get breaks, and would be paid for the entire four hours. I discovered that 15 minutes were being deducted from every single shift, as if myself and more than 20 others were taking breaks. So I kicked up a fuss about it, and went to multiple people until someone took notice. The dumb response?

Manager: You’re right, and I’ve worked out how many days these 15 mins add up to. So you can take X amount of days off, just let me know when.

Me: So I get paid days off?

Manager: No, they are unpaid.

Me: That makes NO SENSE. I worked for free, now you want me to stay home for free?

Manager looks confused as hell at this point: But we owe you TIME, not money

Me: You’re supposed to PAY workers for the TIME that they WORK. So you should either pay the missing hours, or give paid time off. I’ve lost out on income working for free, and now you want me to lose even more staying home for free? It makes no sense

Manager keeps pausing as she struggles to grasp what I’m saying: You can supplement your income with overtime

Me: So, essentially what you’re saying is that instead of paying me for time I’ve worked, instead of giving me paid leave, you now just want me to move my shift to another day?

The whole conversation was so crazy that I just wanted to laugh. She hated me after that. I got everyone their money back, and the contracts rewritten so everyone was paid correctly

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

You should find a rich woman to marry.

 

[blulilacgrl]

"Well, you did say you wanted 4 kids...."

After I took in my sister's kids due to her passing away.

 

[TheSilverLining]

(Anything ever said to me by ANY man.)

If you think I’m falling for that you’re about a decade too late.

 

[RideFl71]

Are those tattoos real? people....lmao