Straight to Bi to Lesbian

[uome1]

I started out sexually as a totally stright woman. During my marriage I bacame Bi-curious. After my divorce I became Bi. After a couple of years I had less and less interest in men, I went total Lez. After all, what do you need with a man when there are strap ons.

Point is, I really love the sensual, tender kisses and the soft skin of women. Throw in the fact that a woman really does know what another woman needs to be sexually fulfilled without having to be constantly coached what to do. Also, most men I had been with would "peter out" way before I was satisfied.

So I am wondering how many of you have had similar transitions? How long did it take? How many of you have been total Lesbian from the get go?

 

[Night_Jasmine]

Mine was odd, actually. I was hammered as a kid that I had to get married and raise a family. So, I kept my eyes on guys..'working' myself into crushes. Weird thing was, I didn't get any type of reaction from kisses. One guy tried to touch my breasts and I nearly belted him. It didn't feel right.

Silly me, I thought it'd be all right once I met the right guy. Nope..sorry. I spent five years of marriage thinking I was asexual. No orgasms, turned off by kissing, you name it - I had that problem. It did not occur to me ONCE that the problem was that I had no inclination towards having sex with the male sex at all.

It wasn't until recently that a friend took the time and showed me I was wrong. Nearly freaked out when I realized that a kiss can get you wet and turned on. Lets not go into my reaction about orgasms. She pointed out afterwards that there was nothing wrong with me...I was lesbian and not hetero.

Guess you could say I went from one end of the spectrum to the other.

 

[SweetCherry]

Mine was odd, actually. I was hammered as a kid that I had to get married and raise a family. So, I kept my eyes on guys..'working' myself into crushes. Weird thing was, I didn't get any type of reaction from kisses. One guy tried to touch my breasts and I nearly belted him. It didn't feel right.

Silly me, I thought it'd be all right once I met the right guy. Nope..sorry. I spent five years of marriage thinking I was asexual. No orgasms, turned off by kissing, you name it - I had that problem. It did not occur to me ONCE that the problem was that I had no inclination towards having sex with the male sex at all.

It wasn't until recently that a friend took the time and showed me I was wrong. Nearly freaked out when I realized that a kiss can get you wet and turned on. Lets not go into my reaction about orgasms. She pointed out afterwards that there was nothing wrong with me...I was lesbian and not hetero.

Guess you could say I went from one end of the spectrum to the other.

Heh. I find this kinda funny, not in a "haha what a freak" sort of way. more in a "my lord, that sounds familiar" sort of way. I didn't have my first girlfriend til I was 30. Now I'd rather have both arms cut off than think about havnig sex with a guy again.

 

[angelkitty7888]

So I am wondering how many of you have had similar transitions? How long did it take? How many of you have been total Lesbian from the get go?

i didn't/don't have any transitions yet.... i had a boyfriend but it didn't even get to kisses so *Shrug* i don't quite count him as a relationship i have my lovely girlfriend who is bi and non-monogomous (i have permission i just don't use it) we have fun.... i'm most probably bi i just haven't had any chance with others yet because i love being with her her boyfriend is a jackass about the 2 of us though so he's out of my possible-fish list.... not to mention i'm a bit of an introvert and anti-social lol (i don't fish) and i'm chubby so generally i get looked over as a possible-fish too.... Eh... *shrug* I love my tiger she's all i need right now

 

[soccergrrl]

I've always known I was bi. As long as I can remember, I remember thinking guys were good, and when I'd come across my brother's Playboys or whatever, I'd wonder what it was like to kiss a pretty girl. When I had experienced both, it only made me realize I had the best of both worlds, and that I like my men to be men, and my women to be feminine.

 

[Etoile]

When I was in high school, I knew I was at least bisexual. I was too involved in activities to actually do any dating, but I had crushes on both guys and girls. My first year at college, I was semi-dating a bisexual guy...we made out, but that was about it. But then when I met the woman who is now my wife, I realized OH MY GOD that's what love and sex are supposed to be like! So that's how it happened for me.

 

[Harrowborg]

Heh. I find this kinda funny, not in a "haha what a freak" sort of way. more in a "my lord, that sounds familiar" sort of way. I didn't have my first girlfriend til I was 30. Now I'd rather have both arms cut off than think about havnig sex with a guy again.

im sure thats not as bad as it sounds lol

 

[Night_Jasmine]

im sure thats not as bad as it sounds lol

I'm sure she didn't mean it in a bad way. It's just..I kinda agree. The times I had with men hurt like heck and to be honest, unless I consider them really good friends, I'm gun shy around guys.

That's one reason I LOVE this area...you guys are such gentlemen!

 

[SweetCherry]

im sure thats not as bad as it sounds lol

Heh.. I didn't mean that in a bad way. I just have absolutely NO desire to sleep with men again. Can't even imagine a situation that would come abuot that would change my mind.

 

[neonflux]

hmmmmm.... your experience is similar to that of many of my friends.

Mine is quite different. I've known I was truly bi since I was 13, over at a buddy's house (male) looking at his father's playboys. hung out with queer kids in high school - amazing we found each other in 1970's Texas. had my first woman lover at 18 in college. identified as a lesbian for a long time just because it was easier and I hated the stigma attached to being bi. problem was, I have a hard time lying and was totally out as bi when i met my most recent woman lover (we were monogamous, btw) when, about 1.5 years ago, I finally started dating again 4 years after the break-up of our very long relationship, rediscovered men - found that I'd missed them and enjoy being with them as much as I do women. at this point in my life, don't want to cut off any part of myself, though. I realize that life is too short and have turned into a greedy gal who wants both. Am now seriously searching for a grrl - missing the soft skin, the particular type of psychic connection, all that, but am finding it extremely difficult to find someone queer identified who has herpes and knows her status... then add that I'd like to find someone who is into bdsm, is switch, and poly - geeze, not asking for much, am I?

sigh...

 

[alisonwunderlnd]

i have always been BI.I prefer men...BUT i do like women.ive always been happy about it and have always been very comfortable with it too.I feel badly for those that have had to struggle

 

[Minouners]

I've been bi for a while and sometimes wonder if I'll become a full blown lesbian. The thought sometimes scares me since i do have a bf (and I live with him) and I think the thought has crossed his mind too.

The time hasn't come yet but if I'm already thinking about it, maybe it's a sign. Time will tell.

 

[persephoneate]

i consider myself bi-curious. and something tells me i would enjoy the company of a female lover. i'm married and happily so but i've had female fantasies for most of my life. not sure what this means. if anything. would have liked to have had the opportunity to experiment more, say in college. maybe someday.

 

[Sterling]

I consider myself straight because I'd never look for a relationship with a man of any sorts but I have had and enjoyed some man/man action.