Stories set in Ancient times

[Dreamerman77]

I'm currently working on a murder mystery story, with IT twist set in Ancient Egypt.

I've tried to search for other stories set in ancient times, not necessarily in Egypt, but haven't found anything.

If you know any in Lit, please link.

 

[Liberia]

I'm currently working on a murder mystery story, with IT twist set in Ancient Egypt.

I've tried to search for other stories set in ancient times, not necessarily in Egypt, but haven't found anything.

If you know any in Lit, please link.

This may not be welcome, in this case just ignore it.

I do not know of any stories and while ancient Egypt is not my main field, but if you have a concrete question feel always free to ask, historian here.
There are different main periods of Egyptian History. Have you decided yet which one? Are we talking bronze age or Cleopatra?

Women had high status, were responsible for feeding their parents when old and they had an amazing bread culture, but I am sure you already researched.


Kind regards

L.

 

[Dreamerman77]

This may not be welcome, in this case just ignore it.

I do not know of any stories and while ancient Egypt is not my main field, but if you have a concrete question feel always free to ask, historian here.
There are different main periods of Egyptian History. Have you decided yet which one? Are we talking bronze age or Cleopatra?

Women had high status, were responsible for feeding their parents when old and they had an amazing bread culture, but I am sure you already researched.


Kind regards

L.

I was thinking New Kingdom era c. 1550-1000 BCE, but I'm not sure if I'll even mention it in the story. One of the characters is Hatshepsut, so I thought that might be suitable, even when she's not the Hatshepsut

I'm trying to keep it realistic, but my knowledge isn't very accurate and extensive research is out of the question, so keeping the story flowing is most important.

The reason I'm looking for similar stories is the dialogue. It's hard to capture the "way they might have spoken" in the dialogue, since I don't want the characters to sound like they live in 90s New York.

 

[Liberia]

I was thinking New Kingdom era c. 1550-1000 BCE, but I'm not sure if I'll even mention it in the story. One of the characters is Hatshepsut, so I thought that might be suitable, even when she's not the Hatshepsut

I'm trying to keep it realistic, but my knowledge isn't very accurate and extensive research is out of the question, so keeping the story flowing is most important.

The reason I'm looking for similar stories is the dialogue. It's hard to capture the "way they might have spoken" in the dialogue, since I don't want the characters to sound like they live in 90s New York.

I once read a novel which stared her. Will look it up for you. You know Collen McCallaugh by any chance?


Completely different period, roman republic, but compelling dialogue. Because of her I was using the latin term for father as a kid. You could of course use modern language as a conscious element, like G.B. Shaw in his Cleopatra play. But then it is funny and a bit ironic.

 

[Dreamerman77]

I once read a novel which stared her. Will look it up for you. You know Collen McCallaugh by any chance?


Completely different period, roman republic, but compelling dialogue. Because of her I was using the latin term for father as a kid. You could of course use modern language as a conscious element, like G.B. Shaw in his Cleopatra play. But then it is funny and a bit ironic.

Any help is appreciated, so if you have reference material for the dialogue, I'm happy to take a look. I think I'll try to make the dialogue as authentic as possible, to set the atmosphere close to right.

 

[Liberia]

So, I have access to an academic article about graffiti from the era of hatshepsut, a book about her queenship, archealogical articles, private inscriptions regarding hatshepsut and more musuem catalogues and descriptions of her. Also a novel by Moyra Caldecott which could be trashy or good.

Tell me if you need any of that.

 

[Dreamerman77]

So, I have access to an academic article about graffiti from the era of hatshepsut, a book about her queenship, archealogical articles, private inscriptions regarding hatshepsut and more musuem catalogues and descriptions of her. Also a novel by Moyra Caldecott which could be trashy or good.

Tell me if you need any of that.

I'll send you a PM.

 

[Liberia]

I think, if you just use annas archive you will get pretty far. For everything behind a paywall: PM

https://annas-archive.org/

 

[darwin1859]

You asked about stories set in ancient times and I recently read "The Lamb Crossed Ishtar's Breath" that I thought that story did a good job (mainly through word usage) of painting a setting that seemed (to me) fairly exotic: https://www.literotica.com/s/lagneau-devant-le-souffle-dishtar (I don't know why the URL doesn't match the story; I think the author is likely a French speaker.)

These were the the tags the author chose: oral; historical erotica; priestess; antiquity; sexual ritual; offering; goddess; mesopotamia; ritual blowjob

I see these stories for 'mesopotamia':
https://www.literotica.com/s/the-roof-of-beauty-and-wisdom
https://www.literotica.com/s/brain-games-ch-05

And there are these: https://tags.literotica.com/pharaoh/ and: https://tags.literotica.com/ancient egypt/

I think there's probably at least a few stories that in the incest category that rely on the pharaoh wedding his sister.

 

[Dreamerman77]

Thank you. The first one looks promising. I need to read it. Tried most of the tags already, but didn't find what I was looking for.

 

[darwin1859]

One other point: I don't know when tags were implemented, but there are stories (even today) without tags and other stories (I assume older stories) that have tags that don't look useful (they look like they were computer-generated from an ML model from a generation or two back).

I posted links to searches for specific tags. If those aren't what you're seeking, I think searching for keywords (e.g., using this link: https://search.literotica.com/) is more comprehensive. And that also produces more false positives, but you can try to address that using special commands: https://www.literotica.com/faq/search

For example: https://search.literotica.com/?query="ancient egypt"

Here's an example story from 2004 that would not show up in a tag search: https://www.literotica.com/s/ancient-egypt-love-between-women

 

[Dreamerman77]

One other point: I don't know when tags were implemented, but there are stories (even today) without tags and other stories (I assume older stories) that have tags that don't look useful (they look like they were computer-generated from an ML model from a generation or two back).

I posted links to searches for specific tags. If those aren't what you're seeking, I think searching for keywords (e.g., using this link: https://search.literotica.com/) is more comprehensive. And that also produces more false positives, but you can try to address that using special commands: https://www.literotica.com/faq/search

For example: https://search.literotica.com/?query="ancient egypt"

Here's an example story from 2004 that would not show up in a tag search: https://www.literotica.com/s/ancient-egypt-love-between-women

Thank you. I did find that one and read it. A beautiful story, though short. I tried to look for a story where the text, especially the dialogue has a certain style, making it "sound" old. For example: (a snippet from my story)

“My father and I have spoken at length. With the throne now open, and Prince Ahmose in need of a strong queen, of an heir... It is only logical that the purest line of the priesthood should unite with the purest line of the throne..."

I just wanted to see how other's might have found the right "athmosphere" to their stories.

 

[darwin1859]

@Dreamerman77 we may be drifting beyond LFS, but have you ever read any of the Dying Earth stories by Vance? His style took some getting used to, but I now accept it as evoking an exotic setting. Below is an except of dialog from "Turjan of Miir." In addition to this style, his word choices are exotic/archaic. And finally, he has some unique vocabulary (e.g., deodands are grues are (different) kinds of "boogey man" that prey upon humans; a pelgrane is a large, dangerous flying predator). Anyway, this style now sounds "old" to my ear.

"In ages gone," the Sage had said, his eyes fixed on a low star, "a thousand spells were known to sorcery and the wizards effected their wills. Today, as Earth dies, a hundred spells remain to man's knowledge, and these have come to us through the ancient books ... But there is one called Pandelume, who knows all the spells, all the incantations, cantraps, runes, and thaumaturgies that have ever wrenched and molded space .. ." He had fallen silent, lost in his thoughts.
"Where is this Pandelume?" Turjan had asked presently.
"He dwells in the land of Embelyon," the Sage had replied, "but where this land lies, no one knows."
"How does one find Pandelume, then?"
The Sage had smiled faintly. "If it were ever necessary, a spell exists to take one there."
Both had been silent a moment; then the Sage had spoken, staring out over the forest
"One may ask anything of Pandelume, and Pandelume will answer—provided that the seeker performs the service Pandelume requires. And Pandelume drives a hard bargain."

Ursula Le Guin achieves this with a simpler style:

As her sister's son he had been nothing to her, but now she looked at him with a new eye. She praised him, and told him she might teach him rhymes he would like better, such
as the word that makes a snail look out of its shell, or the name that calls a falcon down from the sky.
"Aye, teach me that name!" he said, being clear over the fright the goats had given him, and puffed up with her praise of his cleverness.
The witch said to him, "You will not ever tell that word to the other children, if I teach it to you."
"I promise."
She smiled at his ready ignorance. "Well and good. But I will bind your promise. Your tongue will be stilled until I choose to unbind it, and even then, though you can speak, you will not be able to speak the word I teach you where another person can hear it. We must keep the secrets of our craft."
"Good," said the boy, for he had no wish to tell the secret to his playmates, liking to know and do what they knew not and could not.

Would you consider asking AI to help you? I know some people hate AI. And you cannot submit things AI wrote. But I think using AI to improve your writing is OK (it is with me). Anyway, ChatGPT gave me this, which sounds good to my ear (in a chat, you could refine that this is not a proclamation):

Revise this to sound like (the English translation of) an Egyptian Pharoah:
---
So, my dad and I had a long talk. The throne’s up for grabs, Prince Ahmose needs a queen—and yeah, eventually an heir. Honestly? It just makes sense. The purest bloodline from the priesthood teaming up with the royal line? Total power move.

ChatGPT said:

Certainly. Here's a revised version written in the tone and style reminiscent of an English translation of an ancient Egyptian Pharaoh's proclamation:

"Behold! My father and I did convene in solemn council. The throne of Kemet stands ready, its future waiting to be shaped. Prince Ahmose, son of the Two Lands, seeks a queen to stand beside him—and in time, an heir to carry the sacred flame. Is it not fitting? The union of royal blood with the pure line of the priesthood—such a joining is decreed by the gods themselves. It is not merely a union, but a consolidation of divine power and earthly rule. So let it be written. So let it be done."

 

[Dreamerman77]

I've not read any Vance, but that's the style I'm looking for, not in the narrative itself, since it could get tiresome to read, just for the dialogue.

I know AI could help, but I don't want to take the risk. I've had my share of problems with AI rejections in the beginning, just by using grammar correction tools. English is my second language, so have to check the work with something. Rewrite with story over 20k words is... Well I don't want to do it.

Making the text "sound" old seems to be about order of the words and using certain "not so common" -words. But there isn't a dictionary for describing the sex on that manner

Already about half way into the story. Let's see if it ever gets published. Thanks for the tips.

And you're right. This is way off topic, sorry to moderator about that.