State Mottos

[cloudy]

All in fun, folks - I apologize in advance if these offend anyone.

Alabama: Yes, We Have Electricity

Alaska: Jeez, it's cold.

Arizona: But It's A Dry Heat

Arkansas: Literacy Ain't Everything

California: By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda

Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother

Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedys Don't Own It Yet

Delaware: We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water

Florida: Ask Us About Our Grandkids

Georgia: We Put The "Fun" In Fundamentalist Extremism

Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death To Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)

Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes. Well Okay, Not Really, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good

Illinois: Please Don't Pronounce the "S"

Indiana: 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free

Iowa: We Do Amazing Things With Corn

Kansas: First Of The Rectangle States

Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names

Louisiana: We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign

Maine: We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster

Maryland: If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It

Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)

Michigan: First Line Of Defense From The Canadians

Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes

Mississippi: Come And Feel Better About Your Own State

Missouri: Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars At Work

Montana: Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, And Very Little Else

Nebraska: Ask About Our State Motto Contest

Nevada: Whores and Poker!

New Hampshire: Go Away And Leave Us Alone

New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!

New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent Pets

North Carolina: Tobacco Is A Vegetable

North Dakota: We Really Are One Of The 50 States!

Ohio: Where one of your dad's friends lives

Oklahoma: Like The Play, Only No Singing

Oregon: Spotted Owl - It's What's For Dinner

Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal

Rhode Island: We're Not REALLY An Island

South Carolina: Remember The Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender

South Dakota: Closer Than North Dakota

Tennessee: The Educashun State

Texas: Si' Hablo Ing'les (Yes, I Speak English)

Utah: Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus

Vermont: Yep

Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?

New York: You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney

Washington: Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers!

Washington, D.C.: Wanna Be Mayor?

West Virginia: One Big Happy Family - Really!

Wisconsin: Come Cut The Cheese

Wisconsin: Come Smell our Dairy Air

Wyoming: Where Men Are Men (And The Sheep Are Scared)

 

[TheeGoatPig]

New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!

I thought we were the chemical refinery state?

 

[sadangel]

I like both Michigan and Louisiana's motto's. *snicker*

 

[voluptuary_manque]

California's only refers to immigrants from Back East.

 

[sxyoldguy]

I like both Michigan and Louisiana's motto's. *snicker*

All in fun, folks - I apologize in advance if these offend anyone.

Washington: Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers!

You left out that we had been Californicated by their nerds and slackers

 

[sr71plt]

"Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?"

Virginia's own voters said no to that in November--they voted down the slackjawed rural yokel local in favor of the urban technocrat with the Colgate smile.

The traditional moto for Virginia, which I think is still holding fine is "The home of long-ago dead presidents."

 

[CrimsonMaiden]

Most of them I get, but Ohio? I don't understand that one.

 

[Huckleman2000]

Shouldn't Massachusetts' just be "Fuck you!"?

 

[michchick98]

Michigan: First Line Of Defense From The Canadians

I like that one so much better than our traditional one:

"If you seek a pleasant peninsula, look about you."

 

[Huckleman2000]

I like that one so much better than our traditional one:

"If you seek a pleasant peninsula, look about you."

ROFL! That's not a state motto, it's hookup advice! "Seeking a pleasant peninsula? A pulsating protuberance?..."

 

[Liar]

Nebraska wins.

 

[YoursSINSerely]

ALL, very funny. Hope they make it over to DG's thread as well.

 

[oggbashan]

UK Counties

Most UK Counties have a motto. For example my county, Kent's motto is Invicta = undefeated because when William the Conqueror invaded England the Kentish levies stopped his march on London and wouldn't allow him to pass until he agreed to preserve and uphold all their ancient laws.

He agreed. They let him pass. Kent remained more prosperous than other counties for hundreds of years.

But here are a few Southern alternative mottos:

Cornwall: Emetts - leave your money and go away.
Devon: Our cream teas are fattening. We don't care.
Dorset: Oo! Arr!
Somerset: Oo! Arr! with cider.
Hampshire: Our New Forest isn't new, nor a forest.
West Sussex: We were civilised before the Romans came but we forgot how.
East Sussex: Gay pride, recreational drugs? Bring 'em on.
Kent: Apples, Hops and the fastest way out of England.
Surrey: Stockbrokers breed here: so do polo ponies.
London: We've got every culture under the sun - the worst bits!
Essex: Have you heard the Essex girl jokes?
Isle of Wight: Home to Mat, Min and high-security prisoners, or Everything costs more by ferry.

Any more?

Og

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Most UK Counties have a motto. For example my county, Kent's motto is Invicta = undefeated because when William the Conqueror invaded England the Kentish levies stopped his march on London and wouldn't allow him to pass until he agreed to preserve and uphold all their ancient laws.

He agreed. They let him pass. Kent remained more prosperous than other counties for hundreds of years.

But here are a few Southern alternative mottos:

Cornwall: Emetts - leave your money and go away.
Devon: Our cream teas are fattening. We don't care.
Dorset: Oo! Arr!
Somerset: Oo! Arr! with cider.
Hampshire: Our New Forest isn't new, nor a forest.
West Sussex: We were civilised before the Romans came but we forgot how.
East Sussex: Gay pride, recreational drugs? Bring 'em on.
Kent: Apples, Hops and the fastest way out of England.
Surrey: Stockbrokers breed here: so do polo ponies.
London: We've got every culture under the sun - the worst bits!
Essex: Have you heard the Essex girl jokes?
Isle of Wight: Home to Mat, Min and high-security prisoners, or Everything costs more by ferry.

Any more?

Og

I thought in Zomerzet it was spelled 'zider'?

 

[oggbashan]

I thought in Zomerzet it was spelled 'zider'?

It are. But I ain't from Somerset. I spell proper.

Og

 

[oggbashan]

Another one:

Rutland: We were the smallest; now we don't exist. No one noticed us, whether small or extinct.

 

[fifty5]

Most UK Counties have a motto. ...
Any more?

Og

Yorkshire: Where Scots come to feel generous.
Lancashire: The one with the pretty coloured rose.

 

[_Lynn_]

I like that one so much better than our traditional one:

"If you seek a pleasant peninsula, look about you."

*something else I didn't know about our state*

 

[oggbashan]

Welsh Counties

Gwent: G was here but he went.
South Glamorgan (De Morgannwg) We rule Wales but not Cymru
Mid Glamorgan (Morgannwg Ganol) Try pronouncing our districts *
West Glamorgan (Gorllewin Morgannwg) Steel and smoke
Dyfed (of the White Rock)
Powys (Pow! The English are at the gate)
Gwynedd (Snow and castles)
Clwyd (Sand and silt)




* Cynon Valley, Ogwr, Merthyr Tydfil, Rhondda, Rhymney Valley, Taff-Ely and those are the English versions!

 

[oggbashan]

Yorkshire: Where Scots come to feel generous.
Lancashire: The one with the pretty coloured rose.

Yorkshire: We play cricket gradely. Everyone else plays about.

Lancashire: Cotton and Blackpool Rock

 

[fifty5]

Yorkshire: We play cricket gradely. Everyone else plays about.

Lancashire: Cotton and Blackpool Rock

Nah, us laike cricket gradely. What is t'a laikin' at, Og?

 

[oggbashan]

Nah, us laike cricket gradely. What is t'a laikin' at, Og?

Shepherd Neame beer. The brewery is up the road and brewery tours end with samples.

Og

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Shepherd Neame beer. The brewery is up the road and brewery tours end with samples.

Og

Obviously a natural tourist stop--at least for furry tourists!

 

[fifty5]

Shepherd Neame beer. The brewery is up the road and brewery tours end with samples.

Og

Tetleys do that too, or at least they did. And while I admit that if they couldn't serve their own beer well, it would be a poor look out for anyone else, that was one of the best pints I've ever had. (The worst was also theirs, but at a pub, not at the brewery - the only time I remember leaving beer in the glass and walking away.)

 

[SeaCat]

Some runner's up:

Florida, the land of the Blue Hairs

Florida, Home of the Q-Tip

Florida, Brooklyn South

Some common food combinations found nowhere but in Florida:

Grits and Gifilte Fish
Gator, the other white meat


Cat