Sports

[scheherazade_79]

On my way home, somewhere over the Atlantic, I started thinking about sports and exercise. Don’t ask me why, but it always seems most appealing at the time when it’s least possible to do it.

What sports, or forms of exercise have you tried and loved – or tried and hated?

Here’s my list.

Basketball
I went out with a girl who played it for a living, so I made an effort and had a couple of lessons from her and her friends. I hated it. It was relentless.

Baseball
I loved batting, because I always hit the ball hard enough to be able to score home runs without exerting myself too much. Fielding, though… I was always the one who ended up sitting down and making daisy chains out of boredom.

Aerobics
This was forced on me at school. For the first few weeks I got away with hiding behind a pile of gym mats and doing nothing for the whole session. But then the teacher caught me and moved me right in front of her. When I tried it, I realised why I hadn’t wanted to do it in the first place. Like the basketball, it was relentless. No sooner had I got the hang of one thing, everyone else would already be doing something different. When other people were lying down and kicking their legs in the air, I’d be the person who was still skipping sideways across the room, clapping my hands. I developed headaches every Thursday after that.

Canoeing
Totally adore – unless I capsize, and then I panic.

Soccer
I used to play lots and lots – until my parents got concerned about the number of butch-looking women in the local team, and hauled me out of there. It was a shame.

Rugby
I think my friends were having a laugh when they asked me if I wanted to come and practise with the local women’s team. I’m the wrong size for that – and besides, I might break a nail.

Ten Pin Bowling
Phobia. In a flash of absolute madness, I once decided I’d be able to get more power and accuracy with one of the kiddies’ bowling balls… and my fingers got stuck. It took two assistants from the bowling alley and about half a bottle of washing up liquid to get my fingers out.

Kick Boxing
Yes, I did – twice. The first time I just watched; the second time I was a bit slow and walked through those doors for the last time with a real shiner.

Tennis
Probably the only sport I still play. I love smashing the ball really hard.

Swimming
I was taught during school time by guys who were permanently pumped up on steroids. I hated putting my face in the water, but they made me just the same. I have narrow ear canals, and the water kept getting trapped in my ears, so I didn’t hear half of what they were saying – which made them yell at me even more. The result? I flounder, rather than swim.

Badminton
Went through a phase of it, but never really saw the point. If I hit something hard, I want to see that baby fly, not drift serenely over the net. Very unsatisfying.

Fishing
Even though I threw all the fish back into the water, I got real guilt trips about putting a hook through their mouths. Plus the lug worms bit me and drew blood, so it wasn’t really a success.

Golf
I can never hit the fucking ball. It’s too fucking small, fuck it!

Skateboarding
Now that I can do! A misspent early adulthood.

Skiing
I’ve only ever been on a dry ski slope. Half way up, one of my skis got caught in the slope and flew off. I didn’t fancy my chances of trying to snowboard down on one ski, so I got off the lift to go and pick it up. You can probably guess what happened next. Having a ski lift collide with your head hurts – a lot, and might even put you off skiing for life. I’d like to give it another try, though.

Gymnastics
I absolutely despised gym when I was in school. Eventually, my teacher persuaded me to do a roly-poly. It was probably the greatest achievement of her teaching career.

Chess
A terrible thing to say, but there were always too many geeks who played chess. No eye candy at all.

Athletics
I was always quite good at the long jump, but didn’t enjoy getting sand up my shorts – especially not when I was expected to run eight hundred metres after. I did better on the sprints than the long distances. I was also pretty good with the shot-putt, but somehow I never got the chance to throw a javelin or discuss – there never seemed to be enough time in the lesson.

Netball
I enjoyed. It was a bit of a wussy sport, though.

Hockey
This is the only sport I ever, ever got sent off the pitch from. It was ironic, seeing as I spent most of the time trying to dodge that iron ball. A girl from another school took a dislike to me, and decided to smash her stick against my knuckles when the referee wasn’t looking. I ignored it the first time, but when it happened a second time I flew back at her and ended up getting blamed for everything.

Archery
Tried it, always seemed to forget the part about not firing when other people are collecting their arrows, though.

Ballroom dancing
Believe it or not, I was forced to have lessons in school. I had an unbelievable talent for dissolving entire dances by turning the wrong direction, or picking up with the wrong partner. After just a couple of weeks, it was agreed that I should be in charge of the music. And so Cinderella went to her high school ball without a partner.

 

[oggbashan]

Rugby: Except for the advantage given by my size and weight, I wasn't very good but I enjoyed playing.

Rowing: I enjoyed it but was always an also-ran.

Cross Country Riding: 1 On a horse. I was too heavy for most horses and rode horses suspiciously similar to cart horses and therefore trailed the field. When hunting, I was always the one to shut the gates behind us, rebuild walls and fences and to pick up dropped items. I enjoyed riding, but as a competitor I was useless. Useful to hunts, though.

Cross Country Riding: 2 On motorcycles. My motorcycle was a large heavy fourstroke when the in machine was a lightweight two stroke. I could win if the course was through thick mud, but not otherwise. I sustained several serious injuries trying to ride my bike beyond its limits and coming off at high speed.

Surfing: I was one of the last in my area of Australia to use the old fashioned long surfboard, 18 feet long. It would only perform in a straight line down the wave but it could be used for stunts difficult on a short board e.g. doing forward and backward rolls while surfing; surfing standing up with a woman on your shoulders (note: throw her into the sea before the water gets too shallow); collecting tired swimmers too far out to sea because it could carry three people sitting on the board and still float.

Cross-Country Running: I was the wrong build to be a runner but at school it was found that if I ran flat out for the first third of a cross country that was just right to pace the school champion after which another pacer took over so I only ran one-third of most races.

Cricket: Never enjoyed it. I was useless with bat, ball or in the field.

Volleyball I was an adequate performer but almost good when played as the Royal Marines played it - with a heavy medicine ball instead of a normal ball.

ClimbingAdequate most times; sometimes incompetent therefore sustained injuries. At one time a member of a cliff rescue team and usually an anchorman at the top BUT if there was high wind or the rescue had to continue from the bottom of the cliff into a rough sea, I was the preferred person on the lower end of the rope. More injuries...

Field Gun Team Reserve member but not fast enough to be in the competition. Those guns are HEAVY.

Orienteering Good navigator in difficulty country e.g. moors, mountains but too slow to be competitive UNLESS everyone else got lost. Then, twice, I won.

Australian Rules Fast, fun and bloody dangerous.

American Football I only played two games and didn't bother with all the armour. Anyone who has played Australian Rules doesn't need armour - they are immune to anything an American Football player can do and can run rings round the armoured player.

Fell Running I enjoyed it but I wasn't fast enough to be competitive.

Og

 

[Salvor-Hardon]

my exercise history.

Weight lifiting: Current program and I love it. the first few minutes I am done my arms and legs and chest feel so alive with power and energy. Yes I ache later but its a good ache, and has started to make my body shape better.

Volley ball: Used to play 2 man beach back in my college days and was half way decent. Making girls in bikinis stop and watch is a huge ego booster.

Basketball: Tall, strong but clumsy is not NBS material. My one season of high school basket ball I fouled out every game.

 

[rgraham666]

If it's a team sport, I suck at them and I hate them. When I had to do them in school it merely gave the bullies opportunities to hurt me.

Most commonly heard during team sports in my childhood.

Teacher (to bully): That's against the rules.

Teacher (to me): Get up you lazy slacker! You're not hurt that bad.

So I'm not fond of team sports.

Did like the martial arts. Except for classes, I can do it alone. And I like the focused mindset required.

 

[Selena_Kitt]

Hate them all, every last one...

My father wanted a boy... but he got me. Still, he insisted I play sports... but he pressured me so much and was so competitive (boy, where did I get that trait? :x) that I found that I couldn't do anything well enough... so I gave up trying.

Bowling, for example... he gave up on me in baseball, basketball, football, soccer... but bowling, ANY idiot could bowl, he reasoned.

Not me. He signed us up for a father/daughter league. My first score was 9. Not the first FRAME... the ENTIRE game. I knocked down a total of nine pins. My punishment was to carry a bowling ball with me everywhere I went that weekend. Fun stuff.

So I avoided sports like the plague until I was an adult.

Now, I do Yoga (not a sport! ) and I've actually let myself have some fun playing volleyball (although I'm way too competitive, still)

I doubt I'll ever do sports much... too much pressure.

 

[AthenasFury]

Love

Soccer
Baseball/Softball
Football
Tennis
Mountain Biking
Volleyball
Water Skiing
Roller blading
La Crosse
Kayaking
Skateboarding
Roller Hockey
Weight Lifting
Swimming/Diving
Dodge Ball
Rock Climbing
Hiking

Hate

Basketball
Golf
Bowling
Track & Field
Cross Country

 

[Joe Wordsworth]

Love:

Football (NFL, baby--posers can wait at the door)
Boxing

Hate:
Sports that aren't complexly physical in nature (chess, targets, bowling, etc.)

 

[TheEarl]

Rugby - My passion and the sport I play competitively. Love it to pieces and can play at a reasonable amateur level, although nothing special. Saw one game on television, just didn't stop watching and loved it ever since.

Football - Not particularly good at it, but I love the energy of haring around after the ball and the wonderful feel of making the right pass or really connecting with the ball. Something that's so easily played with a group of mates.

Cricket - Again, not particularly talented, but love playing. Bowl a little bit of off-spin and some medium pace, bat atrociously against everything but spin, and field at mid-off or gully. Play that with friends, rather than competitively.

Touch rugby - Like rugby, only a bit girlier. Whole different set of tactics to it though.

Weight-lifting - Into this a fair bit at the moment, but mostly as a route to getting better at rugby rather than out of much joy from the activity itself. It's all right, but I can think of more fun ways to spend my time.

Swimming - Used to love this and used to be a lifeguard. Probably a little too much out of touch to swim the distances I used to, but still pretty competent.

Archery - Like this one. Not particularly good at it again, but good fun.

I'm also a fan of tennis, rock-climbing, canoeing, karate, hockey, basketball, Aussie Rules and even rugby league if I can't persuade anyone to play proper rugby. The only sport I haven't liked doing was track and field, cause I was bored stiff and wasn't particularly good at it. And even then I like watching it on television.

The Earl

 

[oggbashan]

The Earl's mention reminded me:

Archery: A discussion in a pub (Why is it that all such discussions end in disasters?) led to a group of us using our employer's facilities to construct genuine longbows.

The bow staves were made from imported wood, not sure what kind, but we tested them for bending and spring before proceeding to shape them. The ends were slip-on metal tips to take the bowstring.

We made three bows. Two were broken during strength testing to make sure they wouldn't break in use. The third? The draw-weight was 180lbs.

The arrows were made from stainless steel tubing flattened to a point at one end and flighted with thin stainless steel sheet plugged and glued in place.

I was the only one of us who could draw the bow consistently, and then not often.

We went out on to Dartmoor, set up a target of one inch thick pine with concentric circles painted on it. Most of my early attempts missed because with 180 lb draw my muscles were worked too hard to hold steady on the target. When I managed to release cleanly the arrow went straight through the pine, displacing the flights.

Eventually I was asked to shoot at an old oak tree. The arrow embedded itself eight inches into the tree and we had to saw off the part left protruding.

With a normal modern bow? I'm useless.

Og