Spanish-speaking editors?

[InSlowMotion]

I searched through the list, but most of them were long inactive, or their profiles stated that they didn't like the kind of story I'm writing.

Just to let you know about the kind of editing I need: I'm looking for basic advice on plot structure and style. Very little sexual activity actually occured in my first couple of chapters (mostly teasing and solo scenes), but I want to make every chapter feel intense and enticing, because it's a first time story. I just need someone to go over my drafts and tell me whether or not I'm accomplishing this, and hopefully give me some tips on how to achieve the desired effect. I should also mention that I tend to get extremely verbose, so there might be pacing issues to fix, too.

Excerpt from chapter 3:

Sentí sus besos húmedos y temblorosos progresar por mi mejilla hasta intentar llegar mi cuello. Experimenté con distintos roces, distintos ritmos, distintas direcciones, y de vez en cuando alguno dejaba a Celeste sin aliento; sus manos se aferraban a mi espalda, sus labios quedaban inmóviles sobre mi piel, y la sentía exhalar un profundo suspiro a pocos milímetros de mi oído. A medida que Celeste perdía sus inhibiciones, pasó a ser ella quien, con sus caderas, dictaba el ritmo de nuestro vaivén, mientras yo solamente me limitaba a mantener mi pierna firmemente apegada a su sexo. Ya no era yo quien la estimulaba a ella, sino ella quien se daba placer conmigo - y pese a estar completamente vestidos, pese a la oscuridad de la noche y pese a nuestra inexperiencia, el sentir a Celeste entregándose a su deseo era lo más excitante en el universo entero.

I communicate better in English, so please keep that in mind.

That being said, if anyone has any generic links or advice on pacing, by all means send them my way. I did browse around the Writer's Resources section but I have yet to read most of the articles.

 

[_Lynn_]

Please ensure you have switched on your Private Messages. Go to User CP (top left of this page), click on Edit Options (in the left hand column), and then tick Enable Private Messaging in the second box down. Make sure that the next box down (Receive Private Messages only from Buddies and Moderators) is NOT ticked. Finally click Save Changes at the bottom of that page.

 

[InSlowMotion]

Please ensure you have switched on your Private Messages. Go to User CP (top left of this page), click on Edit Options (in the left hand column), and then tick Enable Private Messaging in the second box down. Make sure that the next box down (Receive Private Messages only from Buddies and Moderators) is NOT ticked. Finally click Save Changes at the bottom of that page.

Thanks, I assumed it was enabled by default.