So you're a tough assed biker huh?

[SeaCat]

HAH! Mate, I came in off exercise, but I had to leave the longarm in the truck. Imagine this: Six guys in full camouflage - we still had the warpaint on, and it was a recce exercise, so we look like heavily armed trees - and I forgot to take my sidearm out of its holster, I'm carrying two knives, one of the guys has a freaking axe strapped to his belt. We call him Viking. He's six three, blonde, practically benchpresses five tonner trucks for a living. The name fits.

So we're in this suburban drugstore, and the attendant - petite brunette girl - is pressed up against the back of the counter completely pale, a centimeter away from freaking out. I should mention at this point, three of the guys are speaking Russian, one of them has been awake for close to three days, and one has a training LAAW strapped over the top of his asspack.

Now, I'm a good boyfriend. I'm also a little bitch, according to my alternate team leader. My girl was out of town, so I brought a list of shit she'd left on the counter, things I should pick up before I go back to the house. It's all pretty standard. I add laundry detergent to the list - like I said, it had been a recce ex. Become one with Mother Earth. On the list, tampons. And pads. So I go and get these, we go through the checkout, and the cashier is finally starting to calm down.

Then I put a box of tampons and a box of pads on the checkout and she gives me the best bewildered look I'll ever see in my life. My ATL is snickering. I tell him to shut his face - in Russian - and turn back to the poor cashier, who has just had a fully cammed, knife-bearing, pistol-toting recce snap at another knife-laden pistol-toting walking tree in a foreign language directly in front of her, and say: "Yes miss, I am going to need those. In a bag, please. If I don't get them, I am going to die when I get home." Maybe she responds to stress with humour. I got: "What, are you married to an East German?" as a response.



Exactly. It's like buying condoms. So many people are embarrassed to buy condoms. I have no idea why: that, more than anything else, indicates you're about to get some. Why be embarrassed about that?

I can so see the above happening.

AS for the buying of condoms and being embarrased by it, I have never been shy about it. There have been a couple of times when the person behind the counter tried to make me embarrased but I turned the tide on them with some wise assed remark.

Cat

 

[SeaCat]

Eagle Scout!



The acid test is returning the wrong brand of tampons (because that's what we buy) and getting the right ones.

BTDT until I learned to ask just what kind they wanted. (Lord knows this changes.)

As for being an Eagle Scout, nope never made it that far. On the other hand I follow the old credo of Plan for the worst and hope for the best.

Cat

 

[Boxlicker101]

I remember, a long time ago, when I was in the Air Force. A guy I knew had a date with a young girl, and he bought some condoms at the PX. He had to ask for them, because they weren't self serve. The clerk at the PX was a civilian woman. So far, so good.

The guy had a date that night and, went to pic up the girl, her mother answered the door. Guess what. Her mother was the clerk from the PX. Now, that would have been embarassing.