Simone Biles' aunt died unexpectedly during the Olympics.

[RoryN]

To her naysayers: oops.

 

[rockcasbah]

Olympic Class quitting!

 

[Conager]

Speaking of quitting:

I'll do one better: as of today, no more obituary threads from me on the GB. I'll just post updates in that "Cemetery" thread instead. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(There - proof that I don't care 1/10th as much as they do.) #threadcrashandburn

Did you quit quitting, or can you not quit?

 

[rockcasbah]

#quitting!

 

[RoryN]

This isn't an obituary thread.

obituary = a notice of a death, especially in a newspaper, typically including a brief biography of the deceased person.

 

[Conager]

Don't think you can give a briefer biography than describing the deceased as someone's aunt.

Without the dead body you'd have no thread here at all.

 

[RoryN]

This thread is already triggering nicely.

 

[Conager]

Your go-to whenever you face plant. If you have to tell yourself you are , you ain't.

Now do post count!

 

[IrezumiKiss]

This isn't an obituary thread.

obituary = a notice of a death, especially in a newspaper, typically including a brief biography of the deceased person.

Soooo...mentioning someone's death in the second person without even saying their actual full name counts as an obituary now?

https://media0.giphy.com/media/26gR1wYpogPiJQuwo/200.gif

eh, let them have a half-gotcha at least, Ror'!

 

[Conager]

Nice reach-around, zoomi!

 

[RoryN]

Soooo...mentioning someone's death in the second person without even saying their actual full name counts as an obituary now?

eh, let them have a half-gotcha at least, Ror'!

I might have to - they'll obviously lose their shit otherwise! It's so sad how badly these supposedly grown men need an Internet "win" - but there's the proof, right here in this thread.

Okay, guys: ya got me. Tell everyone.

 

[IrezumiKiss]

I might have to - they'll obviously lose their shit otherwise! It's so sad how badly these supposedly grown men need an Internet "win" - but there's the proof, right here in this thread.

Okay, guys: ya got me. Tell everyone.

we don't even know what she did for a living. The only point of reference mentioned is being Simone Biles' aunt.

I mean...yeeesh. In this particular branch of the Multiverse, obituaries have a specific structure.

If I made an article saying that Adolf Hitler's exiled dentist's granddaughter died in Argentina and just left it at that, I highly doubt I'm getting paid for it without a rewrite!

https://media.tenor.com/images/f7354b8c66dcf774a0cd75d1806e0d56/tenor.gif

 

[Conager]

Yeah it is usually more minimalist in a Rory necro-fetish thread:

"So and so of such and such died. Breaking!"

 

[RoryN]

we don't even know what she did for a living. The only point of reference mentioned is being Simone Biles' aunt.

If I made an article saying that Adolf Hitler's exiled dentist's granddaughter died in Argentina and just left it at that, I highly doubt I'm getting paid for it without a rewrite!

https://media.tenor.com/images/f7354b8c66dcf774a0cd75d1806e0d56/tenor.gif

LOL, 'xactly.

Isn't it sad? (And, by "sad", I mean hilarious!)

 

[rockcasbah]

Yeah it is usually more minimalist in a Rory necro-fetish thread:

"So and so of such and such died. Breaking!"

Broken!

 

[FataMorgana]

I'm dead tired. Do I get a thread?

 

[rockcasbah]

I'm dead tired. Do I get a thread?

Rory just splooged.

 

[RoryN]

I'm dead tired. Do I get a thread?

Not anymore. The GB Deplorable Loser Crew was too butthurt about my threads being popular, so they had a tantrum.

I'll give you a big tribute in the Lit Cemetery thread if you don't get rest anytime soon, though.

 

[FataMorgana]

Not anymore. The GB Deplorable Loser Crew was too butthurt about my threads being popular, so they had a tantrum.

I'll give you a big tribute in the Lit Cemetery thread if you don't get rest anytime soon, though.

Well fuck me rigid. Thread up whatever you like.

 

[rockcasbah]

If this thread were about Simone Biles instead of Rory’s ego, I’d point about that The aunt died after Simon quit.

 

[RoryN]

Well fuck me rigid. Thread up whatever you like.

But they'll cry. It's ugly.

If this thread were about Simone Biles instead of Rory’s ego

That's on you losers.

 

[rockcasbah]

American Heroes like Rory and Simone on D-Day: “you know, i think i’ll sit this one out”

 

[Philthy_Phil]

Rory got lil lace and tranager all worked up without even trying. The little gay litizens sure love them some rory. Lol

 

[rockcasbah]

Q: What do you call a masochistic passive aggressive necrophiliac?

A: Rory

 

[LukSkyFokker]

Q: Who calls lil lace?

A: No one.