Shemale Confusion

[MagikFingaz]

Hello All,

First time posting, but I have been hanging around for a while. I must say I am impressed to see how supportive and informative this collective of people is. I guess thats why I feel like you could help me with some questions I have.

I'm a straight man, 20, and Im in a relationship thats coming on a year now. Recently I have found myslef very attracted and aroused by Transgender women. I can't say that I've ever found men attractive in any way, but when I see a women with a penis Im very aroused. I don't enjoy the sexual company of my girlfriend any less because of this, I find her very sexy and still have a very healthy sex life with her. Even more recently I've found that my desires have grown. I find myself fantasizing about giving head to a TGirl. The thought of having a hard cock in my mouth has become a major fantasy of mine. I almost spent 50 dollars just to go to a girl, keep my clothes on, and give her head. However, if I think of giving head to a male, even in drag, I'm completely turned off.

I know that Im not gay, but I guess my question is, is this normal? Is this something I should discuss with my partner, or something better left for a therapist? Is it natural to act on these emotions, or will that make my obsessions worse?

Any help that you could throw my way would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks,

Mike

 

[HarlotMinx]

Hello All,

First time posting, but I have been hanging around for a while. I must say I am impressed to see how supportive and informative this collective of people is. I guess thats why I feel like you could help me with some questions I have.

I'm a straight man, 20, and Im in a relationship thats coming on a year now. Recently I have found myslef very attracted and aroused by Transgender women. I can't say that I've ever found men attractive in any way, but when I see a women with a penis Im very aroused. I don't enjoy the sexual company of my girlfriend any less because of this, I find her very sexy and still have a very healthy sex life with her. Even more recently I've found that my desires have grown. I find myself fantasizing about giving head to a TGirl. The thought of having a hard cock in my mouth has become a major fantasy of mine. I almost spent 50 dollars just to go to a girl, keep my clothes on, and give her head. However, if I think of giving head to a male, even in drag, I'm completely turned off.

I know that Im not gay, but I guess my question is, is this normal? Is this something I should discuss with my partner, or something better left for a therapist? Is it natural to act on these emotions, or will that make my obsessions worse?

Any help that you could throw my way would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks,

Mike

Normal? Depends on who you ask. It is pretty common though to see men who would date a mtf who don't consider themselves gay. As to why, I have no clue what it is about preoperative mtfs that is such an attraction that is such a turn off when it comes to men. I have a number of theories that deal with socialization but I've never gotten a good answer from anyone as to why that goes any deeper than physical appearance (I think their is more to it than that). I also don't buy the whole "best of both worlds" line. Maybe it's that way in some mens eyes but I've never met a transsexual who consider themselves as having the best of both worlds.

My only words of advice, It's fine to have a an attraction or even a preference for mtf preop transsexuals but be careful when it comes to fetishizing them. I think people all too often see transsexuals as sex objects and not people, I'm not saying this is you or that you will necessarily but it's something to look out for. *shugs* I guess I'm saying, they're more than the sum of their parts.

 

[HerLittlePiggy]

Human sexuality is a very complex issue. The question are you normal is easily answered as yes IMO. Your thoughts are normal in that. You are sorting through normal sexuality issues. Gay, lesbian, bisexual and hetrosexuality are all normal. They are merely different from each other. There is no difference with your attraction to preop ts.

I don't know you. Or your gf nor the tone of your relationship so I can not say if you can talk to her about your attraction to preop mtf ts. I had a gf who would have accepted it as hot and others who would runscreaming. It depends on the individuals and their relationship. That being said I would tread lightly before opening up that can of worms with her.

 

[blade_rocknut]

ur not alone there...

Been happily married for over 12 years and have just in the last couple years discovered this overpowering trans fantasy.It has caused a lot of frenzied masturbation as well as guilt ridden soul searching. The result? Oh F'n well. There is no normal, correct, no baseline for sexual attraction. As long as you're hurting noone and function normally otherwise; so what. I'm also a cross dresser, but have no attraction to men; only this pretend- to- be- her sort of fantasy thing going on; 2 strikes against me for the homophobes, I Guess. Can't put my finger on exactly why trans-porn gets me going so much ( and I've certainly talked to my wife about all this). Trans vs male, female, or other trans ALL get me going. Maybe because of my female envy, I can insert myself into any of the roles, but does it matter? My opinion= happy strokin' friend!
Just noticed the question about sharing this w/ the partner, i believe that your other half deserves nothing less than the truth, even as the truth evolves. I hid my c/d ways from my wife for years, for fear she would think less of me- now that we have no secrets, we are better than ever! ( she knows of my t/g attractions also)

 

[Experiencedguy]

You have received a lot of good opinions and facts. Because (to me) it seems you are looking for something like a label, here is my two cents worth: To me, it seems you are curious (at this stage). Not necessarily bi curious, just curious.

You have received conflicting advice about discussing this with your girl friend. I (also) don't know your relationship, but it can't be that old. I would not discuss it with her, unless you are willing to risk losing her. As somebody else pointed out, she may run out screaming. And, if truely disgusted, tell everyone that the both of you know. If you were in a committed relaionship (i.e., married), then that would be something different.

Good luck with your future.

 

[human_male]

I think you're pretty normal, or at least not abnormal, I don't think it's something you have to worry or be ashamed about. If you'd like to air these feelings there's no harm talking to a therepist.

As to what you should do about it... if I were you I wouldn't act on it because you're in a relationship and it's not worth the risk of losing it. We can't tell you if you should tell your girlfriend about it, only you can guess how she'll react because you're the only one who knows her. I would say telling her is better than cheating on her. If you get to the stage where you're seriously considering taking it outside the relationship, I'd tell her. She might actually enjoy exploring it with you. But if you do tell her you have to make sure she understands you're not simply gay, and that you still find her attractive. If she's worldly and open minded she will understand that for a man to think about sucking dick doesn't automatically mean he's gay. But women can be insecure in their relationships and she might assume this means she is not enough for you. You're going to have to be careful that she understands this isn't the case.

You have a great relationship, a fulfilling sex life... be very careful about doing anything to jeopardise that.

Good luck.

 

[forceme2suck]

Mike I am almost the exact same way, so normal or not you are not alone.

 

[boxmaker]

you could play with my cock anytime....pm me

 

[glamorilla]

the kind of transexual you're fantasizing about would charge you a lot more than fifty bucks to suck her cock.

for every confused straight 20 year old boy theres a lonely 20 year old tranny desperately wanting to take care of you.

figure out what would make you happiest in life and go for it. fuck what anybody else thinks.