Shattered... looking for friends...

[sexadventurer]

Hey people...

I'm a 28 yr old guy

I think I just lost a Best Friend/Soulmate... We used to be so close... We used to go out for a bit and we were so much in love... then we broke-up... but we still were the Best of friends and used to confide in each other for everything... Over a period of time, I don't know what the problem was... she started drifting away... She's still a friend (atleast I still think of her as a soulmate)... but she has started avoiding me... she yells at me... is very harsh... tells me that I suffocate her with my love and affection... when all I try to do is be there for her... Even when she's very nasty, I try to make it up to her and apologize and that only makes her even more furious... All this is seriously affecting my self-esteem... and now I wonder if I'm so horrible a person that even when I offer my complete care and concern, all they wanna do is flee from me... I've contemplated suicide, but wont do it... I'm shattered completely... and she's started lying to me all the time

I need some friends... people who'd respect me for what I am... Am looking

 

[BeingMe]

I just wanted to say hi and I feel/know what your going through. Life will get better, it always does and there is somebody out there for you.

Stay strong!

 

[sexadventurer]

Thanks ... Being Me

Thanks for that message... Coping... Hoping

 

[gypziedoll]

wanted to say hi...hope you are feeling better...*hugs* to you

 

[gypziedoll]

wanted to send you a friendly hug this morning, hope you are doing well

 

[trixiefirecracker]

Thanks for that message... Coping... Hoping

As long as you got hope you got something.......chin up love

 

[Spenser41]

My thoughts

I know it is really hard to continue to be friends after a break up. It is very hard and very rare to do. Especially when one of you is still in love with the other.
When you are still in love with that person, you think you maybe being there for them, but in fact you are so straving for their attention and love that you try to be there for them and in fact can push them away from you. Which is just what you are doing now. You come off as needy, pushy, clingy and the more you do this, the more they hate you for it. That person was ready to walk away. They wanted to be with other people. You in fact were not ready for that, so it is harder for you to deal with.

My suggestion to you is to walk away. You need to have time to heal. The more you stay around and the more you long for her (in hopes you two will work it out) the more you are going to run her off and ruin any friendship you have left.

You need to stop seeing her or being there for her. You need to start moving on. Get out and do things with others. Put some distance between the two of you and you move on with your life.

IF this relationship is to continue as friends, then you need to do this. They say abstance makes the heart grow fonder. She can not know what she is missing, if you are there all the time. Just get out, do some things with friends or just go out on date and just make friendships and not romantic dates. Not until you are ready to move on.

The main thing is, let her be the one to contact you or call you or come and see you. Stop going to be there for her and just let her have her space. Focus on doing things so you are not alone, because that is when you miss her the most. Get out with some friends and have fun. You need to do this for YOU. And if you want any friendship with her, you better do it NOW or she will hate you.

Hope this helps.