Sharing feedback publicly

[KillerMuffin]

I did this once, a long time ago before I had any sense of persons outside of myself in connection with my own writing.

A lovely gentleman with a quick wit and a wonderful way of bolstering my writer's ego used to write to me after every story posted. This was way back in 2000.

And I loved hearing from him. Not because he told me how much he liked my work, but because of how he wrote it. He always brought a smile to my face.

I couldn't help it. I just had to share what he wrote. I had an MSN community at the time, so I posted his feedback and put a link in my profile. It was without his address or identifying things like name, but it was still there.

I heard from him one more time. He wrote that he wished I hadn't done that. He found it embarrassing and had considered our conversations to be private. Then I never heard from him again.

That's my experience with it.

 

[Chicklet]

 

[MathGirl]

Dear Chicklet,

My, that was certainly eloquent

MG

 

[Chicklet]

 

[MathGirl]

Terse

Dear Chicklet,

What does it take to shut you up, girl?

MG

 

[Chicklet]

if you really want me to shut up just say so, in a pm please, and i'll leave the forum for good.

 

[TheEarl]

KM: So sorry. You have my sympathies.

The Earl

 

[Svenskaflicka]

KM, that's too bad. However, as you didn't tell anyone his name or e-mail address or anything else, I really can't see that what you did was wrong. Once he had sent you his mails, I feel they were yours to do what you wanted with.

 

[English Lady]

I can understand that you posted this feedback as a positive thing but I do understand why it backfired too.

I think if someone has sent you something privately you shouldn't post it publicly.


I am pretty sure i'd not like all my private emails exposed even if it wasn't labeled with my email addy or handle. People have a writing style and there is always a chance someone could recognise you just by the way you write.


my personal stance is that anything private should stay private unless you have expressly asked the other persons permission to post it publicly.

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Our Lady is right. You should always ask the other one first before posting something that involves them. I've made a similar mistake myself, and had to go through harsh words, tears and hurt feelings before the whole thing was sorted up.

But, I also try to be careful with my PM's/postings, as it is so easy to get into trouble. I try to never write anything in a mail that I couldn't stand up for on a public board.

 

[pop_54]

Hmm

Sorry you lost your friend muffie but as the girls above say, and as I know you've come to appreciate, private is private.

Someone bothering to honour me in public like that would be a compliment to me, but some folks really do like their privacy.

pops..............

 

[Octavian]

feedback

Now I realise why I am not getting any feedback!
People are obviously worried that I might have gone public with their private comments.
Phew, what a relief.

Octavian

 

[Svenskaflicka]

Me, I DO go public with the feedback I receive - if it's negative and stupid.

Like that moron that obviously had mistaken me with another writer, and scolded me for leading people on with my title/description, promising that the story would be about a blowjob, which it wasn't...

Or that French chick, who got offended when I said I don't like the airport in Paris..?

 

[MathGirl]

I try to never write anything in a mail that I couldn't stand up for on a public board.

Which means, of course, that she will write absolutely ANYTHING