sexual inhibitions???

[julinea]

I am new to these boards...I had jumped on a time or two to check them out due to a curiosity peeked by a friend, but this is my first time really delving into the pages of these threads...

So much of this site speaks to me...in so many different ways I am all but overwhelmed at its discovery... I decided to come on to meet new people, having just moved and feeling a little lost in the sea of endless faces, always with somewhere else to be...

I exist, as I suppose so many do, as a study in contradictions and find myself sifting through the threads of this site and relating to the things that are said and yet feeling myself still stifled by the leaps that I have not yet made...

I want to explore beyond my current bounds but the paths that I have walked have meandered only into the brush, not into the depths of the forrest within my sensual self...

I have read the lines of people here who appear to live within that lush forrest or at least visit there often and uninhibited by whatever doubting creature might lurke in their way....

How did you all find your way to those places...of sexual freedom?
What have your paths of development looked like? Any suggestions for the expansion of an already open mind that wishes to further evolve beyond the bounds that it has thus far met??? I wish to take my time on my on the way...enjoy the journey...

Just wondering how you all stumbled afoot?

J~

 

[mrguitarmn]

I don't know if this is the answer you're looking for but I just can be myself here ( sexually). Here, I don't believe there are such things as inhibitions... well there shouldn't be in my opinion. Here, I have found that I had fetishes/turn-ons that I didn't even know I had. I kinda just self-evolve and most of the time everyone here is accepting of that.

hope this helps

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[MT_Pitcher]

I have read the lines of people here who appear to live within that lush forrest or at least visit there often and uninhibited by whatever doubting creature might lurke in their way....

How did you all find your way to those places...of sexual freedom?
What have your paths of development looked like? Any suggestions for the expansion of an already open mind that wishes to further evolve beyond the bounds that it has thus far met??? I wish to take my time on my on the way...enjoy the journey...

Just wondering how you all stumbled afoot?

J~ [/B]

Welcome
You have wandered into a place where your dreams have no fears and your fantasies can become realities.
Where you faceless self can explore the deepest, darkest parts of your mind and realize one thing. You're not alone!
Welcome to the Lit Zone....

Seriously this is the place where you can lose those inhibitions. You will find all kinds of people here and you can't be hurt by being yourself. You may find that you change over a bit of time when you meet others that expand your way of thinking.
And you may find this place quite addicting.
One thing you WILL find is, there are many more like you than you thought.
Good luck on your journey...

 

[Mysteryman5500]

Re: Re: sexual inhibitions???

Welcome
You have wandered into a place where your dreams have no fears and your fantasies can become realities.
Where you faceless self can explore the deepest, darkest parts of your mind and realize one thing. You're not alone!
Welcome to the Lit Zone....

Seriously this is the place where you can lose those inhibitions. You will find all kinds of people here and you can't be hurt by being yourself. You may find that you change over a bit of time when you meet others that expand your way of thinking.
And you may find this place quite addicting.
One thing you WILL find is, there are many more like you than you thought.
Good luck on your journey...

MT_Pitcher that is so well said!! Welcome to Lit julinea
Let your inhabitions go and have fun!

 

[Seakla]

Someone on Lit once said that women are generally taught that sex is for prcoreation, but not to be enjoyed. So many things are construed as "naughty" or taboo by even our society. But, in fact, there is nothing wrong with the different fetishes that we have. As long as people are careful, and all parties are consentual (and of age, I think pre-teens and young teens are too immature to make such desicions) then there should be nothing immoral about sex.

My husband, SoulcatcherX started coming here first because he really likes to look at pics. Hey, I don't mind, I flip through playboy every now and then too or check out a pic online...then he got me into looking at Lit pics and threads and I joined. It is the first time my husband and I have been on a msg board together and we are enjoying the hell out of it! I like watching him flirt with women..and many of them flirt with me too, and he likes watching me flirt with men. It's all in fun...we know where the love iand commitment is even if the eyes are momentarily elsewhere. There are many nights we look at Lit together and end up in the bedroom...or on the couch...or the floor.

I like exploring different areas too. There are certain things I will just never do but other than that I am not very inhibited anymore and I think if a person is afraid of sex or inhibited it is a black mark on thier self-esteem. If you have the utmost self-esteem for yourself then there are more things a person can and will be open too.

I always thought it was bad of me to find women attractive or t owonder what it would be like to be with one. I buried these secrets until college. But, even though I love men and do not think that I would make a commitment to a women if I were single, I realize now that it is not bad and I am still hoping to appease many curiosities with a girl.

This site is a place to shed some inhibitions and try new things and to grow as a person. I never thought I would ever take nude pics and if I did I figured no one on here would be nice or even look at them. But I was very wrong.

 

[LorriLove]

welcome new friend

yes this place is ideal for pushing out the boundaries emotionally... that is finding new things that you think would interest you... but real life is the only place to find out if you mean it

i had no inhibitions when i first came here, and so this site has had little effect on me other than to give me an outlet for my wilder confessions that i'd dare not admit to locally... but that has been so refreshing, an outlet at last... not all people would tollerate some of my nastier habits and preferences, so i've had to tread carefully, but it's been fun, and i've offended a few, which is always fun

 

[bethesdabob]

Shut the hell up

God damn you talk too much, what's with the touchy feely bullshit, get on track goddummit.

 

[Feistyred16]

Re: Shut the hell up

God damn you talk too much, what's with the touchy feely bullshit, get on track goddummit.

Whoaaaa BB!
Someone piss in your Wheaties this morning???

 

[kintama]

Re: Re: Shut the hell up

Whoaaaa BB!
Someone piss in your Wheaties this morning???

i think in his coffee too

 

[julinea]

without being too hoaky, many thanks...

Your replys have done a lot to restore some of my hope that there is a decent and interesting set of people out there online... I am also rather new to the chat arena... I have been out and about but encountered places littered mostly with people exchanging only flat small chat in non sexual rooms...that didn't seem to allow enough lee-way for the breadth of my humanity (including my verbose nature ) or others throwing sexually dull and meaningless advances my way...

Your replys were an awesome read for me. It is reassuring and exciting to see such a positive response and know that there is a lot more yet to explore here. ME, MYSELF and MY SASSY side await any questions you all might have, since you have been so gracious as to answer some of mine... I am open to discussion but reserve the right to draw my own line as I am sure you all do and I am looking forward to what more you might all have to say

J~

 

[CutieMouse]

Re: without being too hoaky, many thanks...

*****

 

[SpectralDragoon]

Mmm, Verbose.


Welcome to Lit.

 

[LLs Man]

Inhibitions? What are they?

LL & I certainly don't have any, but I agree with the others that Lit is a great place to lose any you may have

Spectral, that is one awesome Av!!!

 

[SpectralDragoon]

Thanks, it's art by Luis Royo.

 

[Minnesota_Guy]

I also am new to Literotica and intend on exploring my sexuality as well. After browsing through some threads, this appears to be the place to do just that.

The openness here astounds me! The honesty with which others respond to the subjects of sex, sexuality, and sensuality is amazing. I feel like here, those things which don't come up in normal conversation can be discussed without hesitation.

I think this the first step in my exploration.
I'm glad I found Literotica and to know that I am not alone in my quest.

 

[CJontherocks]

I'm new at Literotica also, and I've found it to be entirely refreshing and intellectually (as well as sexually) stimulating. I lost any inhibitions I might have had at an early age, but I don't necessarily feel free to discuss experiences or desires with the people I normally associate with. Being a guy, of course, there are things we just don't talk about to each other. With women, I am less inhibited, but again there's often some perceived pressure to be or act a certain way. I spent the last 18 years married to a woman I would never discuss these things with--not in a million years. We shared a bed with a couple on three occasions and never spoke of it at length.

Literotica is a great venue for me to be as open and free as I want to be. But I'm also learning to open up to those I spend my realtime with. I'll probably never tell my poker buddies that I've tried cocksucking and liked it and fantasize about it often... but the women I've told (two out of three) have absolutely loved the thought. My goal is to be myself, whoever that self turns out to be. So I practice here and employ it out there. Who knows? I might even try my hand at erotic literature!

 

[julinea]

My inhibitions, what are they?...hummm

well I guess thay are kind of hard for me to put into words...so I had to think about it for a bit...but reading some of the posts here and other threads has helped...

I know that I am a sexual person but I guess it has for a long time been a part of myself that has been employed mostly with tactical effort rather than actual enjoyment.

I think a lot... too much for my own good and when it comes down to life on a daily basis I have done a lot of hard work at trying to be myself and like who that is. I have come a long way but still have quite a ways to go. There seem to be two major areas of my life where I get stuck; Sex and money. Woven insidiously, over time into the fabric of my beliefs, each has asserted its place as a marker among an internal system of self assesment. Money marks freedom and sex marks worth, in essence they represent elements of power and control in my life. Both can and do exert a death grip on my perspective and often serve to mar my sense self esteem by drowning it with doubt.

As such the use of money in social situations has projected to me the true intentions/motivation of those people spending time with me. I am forever over analyzing what others I care about are thinking about whatever exchange is happening. Take a dinner out for example... If they pay, am I sponging? If I pay will it set an expectation? If we split it will they think I am being cheap? Inane scripts formulating influence in the background of my brain like loud wallpaper. would like to live as if money didn't matter because in my heart I don't believe it should; however my attempts to do so have taught me that its social implications cannot be left totally unaddressed...that a mutual understanding and respect must be maintained in order for money to really not matter. I guess for me I fear the manipulator money can make out of people. Social sincerity becomes imperative in the foreground of my life as a counter to the atmosphere of doubt that often clouds my mind.

It is in a similar light that sex has developed as more of a means of securing attention than as a means of true self expression. The nasty cycle of self doubt that I have lovingly named "MERVE," keeps me from believing that there are not alterior motvive invloved, from really trusting that the other person cares. I know that I am meshing quite a lot together when I use the word sex in this case but for me it has evolved as a series of interconnected ideas. Existing almost as levels of awareness or consciousness...Love, Sex, Friendship and Self have traded out for one another like passing through the mists in a bog. The lines between them become indistinguishable for me from time to time because I tend too often to place potency in the hands of the other person, making myself (unwittingly) at their mercy. My response most typically being to people please...where in lies the the short version of my answer to what my current dilema is with sexuality.

I have a hard time remaining self possessed and am forever in the state of struggle to regain my standing, even when no one is fighting to hold me back. I have huge self suppressive tendancies that have been ingrained over time. They serve to kick me out of the "moment" which prevents me from gaining much pleasure. Instead I have tended to live vicariously through people pleasing or else detach and surreptisiuoly analyze the encounter while playing the "charater" of me. You don't get hurt that way from the knives one might find out there but then again you also don't bleed and how alive is a person who, when cut, does not bleed?

I met a person a short time ago that has had the patience to look beyond my battles with myself and my battles with my past to see the warrier and the woman within. I know he stuggles with the frustations of having to wait to be "let in." He has helped me to start the process of letting go of the past and of myself so that I can be free but the process remains long and my fears are stronger sometimes I think, than even his love for me.

I have passion and intensity that has acted as a bouy in times of need but even this has weight, at times making it too heavy.

I have masturbated pleanty, but even that was mechanically in its execution. I have even been sexually explorative and active at it more than regularly but my passion has somehow always been redirected to intellectuallity. Sex became a game in many was, a chess of the body. Whose move could dominat the play, without sacraficing the queen? Although that has its merrits I would like to let loose and mixed my passion within my sexuality. I have sought to do that before by making the "battleground" safe but that in it self was just another way of restriction and a false sense of security. I want to be able to let down my guard and enjoy the sensualtiy without my irrational fears steping in to persuade me.

J~

 

[CJontherocks]

Wow. That was incredibly insightful and articulate, Julinea. And I thought I was well on my way to self discovery. I should be your pupil.

 

[StevenWill]

Analysis, Shamalisis

You obviously like to write and it seems you have created a literary monument to your own conflicts. Those conflicts are obstacles to be knocked down one at a time on the road to becoming who you want to be. They are not the points of the story, they are the villains. One thing that sex therapy teaches us is that people need to DO, not just talk. You can talk and analyze and fret and worry and delve all you want but, until concrete steps are taken, it is just talk. Treat the symptoms because thrashing around the shadowy past in hopes of finding the threads that lead to the ultimate origin of your conflicts will not make the conflicts go away.

We all tell ourselves stories about ourselves but they are not always accurate and even more often they are irrelevant. Write a story about small concrete steps taken to move forward, not about “internal systems of self assessment.” Maybe becoming active on Lit is one of those steps. I hope so.

“I have even been sexually explorative and active at it more than regularly but my passion has somehow always been redirected to intellectuallity.”

You said it, not me. You know why psychoanalysis is so expensive and takes so long? Because it doesn’t work.

If you want to learn how to cook, you don’t start with years of self discovery about how your love-hate relationship with food has colored your past left you flummoxed and paralyzed about the symbolism of the food in religious communion ceremonies.
You go out and you buy a cookbook and you start making a mess in the kitchen.

Start making some messes.

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[scott40]

xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[julinea]

merely an intro to the platform that exists beanath me

Although it is what I stand on and it is there... I think it may sound more ominous as presented in black and whit e than it operates as in my daily life...

I do agree I need to let go of much and that is why I am here...

that explanation of my inhibitions was kind of the long version of what I see as holding me back... I am here to forge ahead of that in ways....one of which has me looking for some female companionship and another of which has me looking for someone who I might feel comfortable exploring with more than I already do with my partner...in different ways so that my growth on here will benefit my play in the bedroom, kitchen, living room or where ever else it ends up for that day....

Who ever posted the cooking analogy was right on target (as were many of the rest, thanks for the support and input for those of you who pm'd me...I will be replying, its just taking a while as I have been working up a storm on this end) I love to cook and I LOVE to make a mess!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am out to have more fun while I make the messes bigger more of the time...

Unwinding from that intellectual stronghold that surrounds much of my day takes a slow steady hand and a lot of trust...

I have that in my partner... I just want to expand my learning curve....

J~