Sex facts. Funny!

[Betticus]

Giving .........head....... massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories.

Swallowing foreign body juices is actually like taking vitamins and it whitens your teeth

The American Dental Association says that semen cuts plaque better than mouth wash, so suck a dick and save a smile.

Having nice sex burns 358 calories.

Having rough sex [make it hurt] burns 543 calories.

Take off her clothes
with her consent.........................12 cal
without......................187 cal

Take off her Bra
With two hands..........................8 cal
With one hand.........................12 cal
With mouth.............................85 cal

Put on Protection
hard ........................... 6 cal
soft..........................315 cal

Foreplay
Looking for target...................8 cal
Finding G spot ......................92 cal
I don't F***ing care.....................0 cal

Entry
Holding her..................12 cal
On the floor.................8 cal

With Different Position
Missionary..........................358 cal
Doggy...........................316 cal
69 lying...............................286 cal
69 standing.............................512 cal
Italian hanger.........................912 cal

Orgasm
Real................................112 cal
Faking................................315 cal

After "O"
Lying in Bed............................18 cal
Hop off the bed............................36 cal
Wondering why she left pissed off...........816 cal

Get dressed
Quiet and calm...........................32 cal
Rushing.........................98 cal
Heard her boyfriend opening the door.............1218 cal
Heard her dad/2 yr old baby sista at the door.............1942 cal
Her mom walking in..............................Priceless!!!LOl

 

[Evil_Geoff]

Swallowing foreign body juices is actually like taking vitamins and it whitens your teeth

Okay... I gotta ask:

What does swallowing domestic body juices do for you?

The American Dental Association says that semen cuts plaque better than mouth wash, so suck a dick and save a smile.

Did you get this information from your dentist, and do you really expect us straight guys to suddenly change our minds about sucking dick because it will give us better teeth? Do we get the same benefit if we jerk a load on our toothbrush and use that instead of (or as a supplement to) our regular toothpaste?

*weg*

 

[Betticus]

Okay... I gotta ask:

What does swallowing domestic body juices do for you?



Did you get this information from your dentist, and do you really expect us straight guys to suddenly change our minds about sucking dick because it will give us better teeth? Do we get the same benefit if we jerk a load on our toothbrush and use that instead of (or as a supplement to) our regular toothpaste?

*weg*

Sometimes I wonder about you.

 

[neonflux]

OK, I have to ask, what is an "Italian Hanger?" Can't believe I don't know...

And now for an animal sex fact:

Elephants have prehensile penises that work very much like their trunks. They masturbate by wrapping them around young sapplings and rubbing up and down.

True - saw it in a video shown as part of a "religion and the body class" in undergraduate school, taught by Lawrence Meridith auther of the book, "The Sensuous Christian." He was removed from his Chaplaincy at U of the Pacific (a once Methodist college) for inviting both Angela Davis and Alestair Crowley to do sermons during Sunday services....

Oh, and yes to rough sex! (although I DO want to know where your stats came from)

~ Neon

 

[FurryFury]

OK, I have to ask, what is an "Italian Hanger?" Can't believe I don't know...

And now for an animal sex fact:

Elephants have prehensile penises that work very much like their trunks. They masturbate by wrapping them around young sapplings and rubbing up and down.

True - saw it in a video shown as part of a "religion and the body class" in undergraduate school, taught by Lawrence Meridith auther of the book, "The Sensuous Christian." He was removed from his Chaplaincy at U of the Pacific (a once Methodist college) for inviting both Angela Davis and Alestair Crowley to do sermons during Sunday services....

Oh, and yes to rough sex! (although I DO want to know where your stats came from)

~ Neon

*chuckles*

I don't know what it is either but it can't be as good, raw or as dirty at the Sicilian version right?

Ah, here from the Urban Dictionary is a definition:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=italian+hanger

Seems I've thought about that a LOT. Too bad I can't seem to do a head stand. I also thought titty fucking in that position would be hot but u, anyway . . .

I also didn't know this about elephant penis's. (I'd like a prehensile elephant cock with my religion please?) Interesting stuff that. Thanks for the information!!

*goes off to think for a while*

Fury

 

[the captians wench]

*chuckles*

I don't know what it is either but it can't be as good, raw or as dirty at the Sicilian version right?

Ah, here from the Urban Dictionary is a definition:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=italian+hanger

Seems I've thought about that a LOT. Too bad I can't seem to do a head stand. I also thought titty fucking in that position would be hot but u, anyway . . .

I also didn't know this about elephant penis's. (I'd like a prehensile elephant cock with my religion please?) Interesting stuff that. Thanks for the information!!

*goes off to think for a while*

Fury

hehehe

I need to practice my handstands, I think I know some one who would be very interested in trying deffinition #2

 

[neonflux]

*chuckles*

I don't know what it is either but it can't be as good, raw or as dirty at the Sicilian version right?

Ah, here from the Urban Dictionary is a definition:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=italian+hanger

Seems I've thought about that a LOT. Too bad I can't seem to do a head stand. I also thought titty fucking in that position would be hot but u, anyway . . .

Fury

Interesting... This was one of the first positions in which the straight married couple fucked (not simulated) on Shortbus (great film, urge everyone to see it). Have to admit that as I watched them, all I could think was, who would actually enjoy sex that way? And I work out daily and am pretty flexible, LOL... (Put me on top anytime.)

Thanks for the link,
* chuckling back*
~ Neon

And yes, Sicilian is good, LOL

 

[Perfect_Trust]

Giving .........head....... massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories.

I would of preferred the calories with my ex - never mind jaw massage, his cock damaged my jaw & I had to see a doctor!

 

[Evil_Geoff]

Sometimes I wonder about you.

Just another benefit received by hanging around with one of the strangest ducks on the planet...

I give you something to do in your idle moments!

*LOL*

 

[kiten69]

Her mom walking in..............................Priceless!!!

LOL