Seeking help with Collarme profile...

[Chicklet]

So, I've had my profile up for about a year and a half now I think... I've changed the content of the profile a few times, most recently a few months ago. I'm ready for a change, personally.

I need to think of another theme, or another way to do it...but for some reason I just can't. All the information I wanted to include is there. But, I'm BOOOOORED with it. Plus everyone's already read it so nobody new is emailing me.

Anyone have any ideas?

This is my profile now - I change the main pic pretty often, this one's from last tuesday.

 

[WriterDom]

I'd change the picture to your school girl outfit.

 

[Chicklet]

lol

that's a terrible picture though. i SUPPOSE i could add it in when I put a new main pic up

sucks 'cause it takes them DAYS to update your pic and they take them ALL down while one is pending.

lol when i switched it the last time i got about a dozen emails "PUT YOUR PICTURES BACK UP!!!"

 

[naxalite0906]

So, I've had my profile up for about a year and a half now I think... I've changed the content of the profile a few times, most recently a few months ago. I'm ready for a change, personally.

I need to think of another theme, or another way to do it...but for some reason I just can't. All the information I wanted to include is there. But, I'm BOOOOORED with it. Plus everyone's already read it so nobody new is emailing me.

Anyone have any ideas?

This is my profile now - I change the main pic pretty often, this one's from last tuesday.

I'd email you, but I am too far away
Speaking of which, I probably need to improve mine too, nobody emails me.. lol

 

[Hisbabydoll26]

Comes across very honest and specific (not in a bad way).

 

[midwestyankee]

The one thing I didn't see very clearly was what I, as a dominant, could expect from you and your submission. What's in it for me, in other words. Most of the content in the far right-hand column was about you, and while I could infer that I'd have certain kinds of relational experiences with you based on what I read there, I found myself having to presume that my inferences were correct.

Please understand that this is a strictly functional review of your profile. I fit only one aspect of your target audience and am disqualified by several important factors.

 

[SweetErika]

I'm taking quotes from it for ease, but just let me know if you'd like me to remove them at any time.

***Warning! The female described below could possibly be considered high maintanence, more than a little bit clingy, and possibly a nutcase. Proceed with caution.***

I get this, but I think it's possible people who aren't familiar with your style will take it literally and not contact you because of it.

Humor and honesty are great, but I'd suggest coming up with an opening line that showcases those parts of your personality without seeming negative.

**Three words that describe me:

-Twisted.
-Shy.
-Scorpio.

I think I have a twisted sense of humor, of view, and enjoy the twisted aspects of life. That's part of what I think lead me into this 'lifestyle.' I'm shy at first, but bolder at different times of the month. I take things slow and then I pounce. I'm a scorpio, and a typical one at that. Quite the hellcat when you add in my hair color, no?

This is better - it shows your personality and isn't boring.

To nitpick, the only part that caught my attention was the bold sentence. I couldn't help but think you were referring to your menstrual cycle. Then again, maybe you were. If not, perhaps you could say something like, 'While I can be shy at first, I'm bolder once I start to get to know someone.'

BDSM means a lot of different things to a lot of different people. Some people like the leather community, and are active in their area. Some people are hard-core, some people use the term "extreme." Some people like Daddy/daughter, Teacher/student, Master/slave. Some people just want to tie their lover up now and again. It means a lot of different things to a lot of different people. And the key for me is matching up what it means to me with what it means to another, and that person can become a good partner.

To me, submission is about the gift of myself to another. I submit because I want to please my lover. I would never use the term 'natural submissive' to describe myself, because for me, sometimes submitting is a struggle. It's a thought in my head to struggle between what I want and what my lover wants, and to accept that what he wants is what I'm going to do. My first instinct is selfish. But what I want to do is selfless.

Given your audience, I find the first paragraph unnecessary and kind of condescending. Plus, it doesn't say anything about YOU, and you repeat yourself.

Anyone who has a clue about BDSM or is someone you'd like to meet is going to know it means different things to different people, and will have the expectation that people want to find others with similar styles/interests.

The second paragraph, however, gives good info about you, and I think you should keep it (or at least the ideas in it).

Otherwise, you might run it through a spellcheck so misspellings don't distract people, and pare down the explanations of what you don't like a little (especially the older men part). I think those are important, but I felt like you were justifying and making their case too much, and it started to drag on a little. Minor things, perhaps, but I think they'd improve how it reads overall.

I also didn't see you say anything about poly/mono, yet from what I've read, it seems like you're looking for monogamy. If one style's preferable or a dealbreaker, you might want to mention it up-front (plus, it can help weed out all of the "My Master/girl and I are looking for another girl" messages, if that's not something you're open to).

 

[graceanne]

I agree with Erika - I think that the intro part might scare off guys. I mean if I was looking through the hundreds of people on collarme, I'd be just looking at the basic information, the picture, and the intro. If that didn't catch my attention I'd move on.

 

[DVS]

I don't know if I agree with everything you;ve been told so far, but who am I to talk? My profile hasn't done that well for me, either. I've sent out MANY messages and never hear a thing. I've received just a couple initial messages from women...one of which emailed back and forth with me, a few times.

But, when I said I wasn't into the Gorean lifestyle (I said nothing bad about it) and I wasn't into knitting (I didn't think that would be a problem for mt to admit to) she stopped emailing. She didn't say why, or even say "fuck off". She just stopped. In the beginning, she mentioned I had a long profile. She said that told her I was real. I guess when I mentioned I wasn't into the Gorean thing, I was being too real.

I really wonder about some of the people on collarme. Sure, I"ve heard stories of people who have met their SO on collarme or have met a lot of good friends on there, but that has not been my result. I've had a profile on there for about five years now, with very little response.

So, when I say I don't see a whole lot wrong with your profile, I guess you should take what I've said above to heart. Sure, the very beginning could scare some off, but it wouldn't me. But, I do think I can say I know a little about you, reading your posts for a number of years. That could make a difference. I wonder if my dry sense of humor has maybe killed some of my chances, because they weren't aware of my sense of humor.

Sure, I've mentioned it in my profile, but I've also read a lot of women's profiles where they say "no men need respond" or something like that, only end up adding it again in BOLD BLOCK LETTERS somewhere. I know that's because they were still getting emails from men. And, you mention at the bottom of your profile that men older than you are just not your thing, and also switches are a no-no. I wonder if you are still getting messages from older men and switches.

People just don't always read the profiles. I've even looked at the profile picture then at the list of what she likes first, but I always read the profile. I don't see how it helps someone to not read the profile. If it's written correctly It does tell a lot about that person.

I don't think your paragraph about older men is that bad. Again, I think that could be because I know you from here. It might seem, like SweetErika said, that you could be swayed into maybe dating an older guy, if you'd allow him the chance to try. And, you might move that closer to the top, as well as the part about switches.

Make sure you put anything you want everybody to see high enough in the profile that even the people who don't read the whole profile will hopefully get that part. Then, if they aren't switches or old men, they can read on, to read what you do like.

I liked all of the pictures, but none of them really stood out. And, there's nothing wrong with that, because they were all nice, clear pictures. But if you think your priofile isn't getting noticed, maybe adding a couple of pictures that do stand out is good.

I think you have a nice ass. Put on a nice worn in pair of blue jeans and take a picture of the back of your body, with you looking back over your shoulder into the camera. If you want to put some bondage pics in there, maybe have your hands tied behind your back in that picture. Or, maybe another pose similar to that, but with your hands tied ini front. But, keep the bondage light. Don't be too graphic. Or, maybe like WD said, one of you in your school girl uniform cuold work. And, if you don't decide to do any of this, could you at least send me copies?

I'm with you on making sure someone knows what you like and don't like by putting it in your profile. Knowing up front something that might hurt someone's feelings is better than finding out after they had their hopes up about you. But, it can also make you seem like you are too picky. You really can't get away from thiat with some people, but saying these things in a nice way is the best you can do. If it works, it works. If it doesn't, at least you tried.

Now, like I said up front, my profile isn't doing very well, either, so keep that in mind, while you think any of my suggestions over. Oh, but those pictures? I can send you an email address for those. OK?

 

[graceanne]

Actually, on what DVS was saying - I'd say that you should probably put what you're looking for in your headline.

 

[Chicklet]

I get this, but I think it's possible people who aren't familiar with your style will take it literally and not contact you because of it.

actually lol most people think i'm joking, when i really AM serious...

To nitpick, the only part that caught my attention was the bold sentence. I couldn't help but think you were referring to your menstrual cycle.

and yeah, that's a cycle reference.

 

[Chicklet]

i think i didn't really explain what i wanted when i posted this thread originally...

i want brainstorms for a totally different format. i actually love the content of my profile right now, and think that it suits me, BUT i'm bored with it...

the theme for this one was lists of three, and it flowed well so i kept it. the last one was a rant about what i didn't want that went on for about seven pages and also got quite positive responses lol...

i'm just bored with the way it sounds and looks, and want to change it. but, like, does anyone have a theme idea along the same lines as my lists of three? i have absolutely no creativity this weekend...

 

[Chicklet]

I think you have a nice ass. Put on a nice worn in pair of blue jeans and take a picture of the back of your body, with you looking back over your shoulder into the camera. If you want to put some bondage pics in there, maybe have your hands tied behind your back in that picture. Or, maybe another pose similar to that, but with your hands tied ini front. But, keep the bondage light. Don't be too graphic. Or, maybe like WD said, one of you in your school girl uniform cuold work. And, if you don't decide to do any of this, could you at least send me copies?

first, i don't have anyone to TAKE the pictures.

second, i dont' want dirty pictures up there... i think they attract a lot more of the idiots that i already have to fend off

 

[WriterDom]

So if you send a "quick note" to someone at collarme, and they reply, is it in the "read email" where you find it? I've had a profile there but haven't even been active enough to even work on my profile. I had a few friends at bondage.com but I left there when it became a pay site.

 

[WriterDom]

So if you send a "quick note" to someone at collarme, and they reply, is it in the "read email" where you find it? I've had a profile there but haven't even been active enough to even work on my profile. I had a few friends at bondage.com but I left there when it became a pay site.

Never mind, the site just turned down a pic I sent in and sent me a message. Bastards.

 

[Evil_Geoff]

i think i didn't really explain what i wanted when i posted this thread originally...

i want brainstorms for a totally different format. i actually love the content of my profile right now, and think that it suits me, BUT i'm bored with it...

I'm thinking "outdoors-y" Yeah... pics of you in the woods, at the beach, outside in the sunshine... in the like and dislikes you can explain all the things you like to do outside... skinny dipping, being tied to trees, coed naked lawn darts or volleyball...

 

[Chicklet]

again though, i really only have pics i take myself ...

if someone wants to fly to portland and take some pictures that'd be very cool