AuralStimulation
Virgin
- Joined
- Apr 5, 2020
- Posts
- 1
I've posted a few audios that are different than most audios on this site in as much as they are multi-voiced and done in the style of radio dramas. I would welcome any feedback to these. Thanks!
Seeking Feedback on Audio Stories
- Thread starter AuralStimulation
- Start date
Bramblethorn
Sleep-deprived
- Joined
- Feb 16, 2012
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- 19,095
Link to those stories: https://www.literotica.com/stories/memberpage.php?uid=5387542&page=submissions
tomlitilia
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Jul 28, 2011
- Posts
- 845
Here are my very subjective impressions on Happy Birthday Jennifer:
Generally a good pacing, but the story is quite linear. The only drama is the brief passage where the wife says she's not sure she can go through with it. Then, straight after, she dives right in.
The narrator's voice is good, even if there is something that sounds slightly artificial in the tone. (Maybe an effect of the recording equipment or processing?) There is also a tendency for too long dramatic pauses.
The dialog sounds unnatural, and I don't think that's because of the actors. I think there is some effort in the writing to portray the scene through dialog, but it often makes the conversation sound unnatural--not like real people talk
I liked the prologue, but I didn't pick up on the interracial aspect until the then, and I think it was an odd thing to bring up in passing, like sprinkling an unnecessary, tired trope on at the last minute to spice it up. That said, I think the story otherwise did a good job of dodging common tropes in wife-sharing stories, especially that the husband wasn't portrayed as a wimp with a dick much smaller than the other man's.
I see a lot of potential in this, and even if I think a straight narration (rather than radio drama) would work better for me, I think the actors did a good job at not overacting, even through the intense parts.
Good luck with future stories!
Generally a good pacing, but the story is quite linear. The only drama is the brief passage where the wife says she's not sure she can go through with it. Then, straight after, she dives right in.
The narrator's voice is good, even if there is something that sounds slightly artificial in the tone. (Maybe an effect of the recording equipment or processing?) There is also a tendency for too long dramatic pauses.
The dialog sounds unnatural, and I don't think that's because of the actors. I think there is some effort in the writing to portray the scene through dialog, but it often makes the conversation sound unnatural--not like real people talk
I liked the prologue, but I didn't pick up on the interracial aspect until the then, and I think it was an odd thing to bring up in passing, like sprinkling an unnecessary, tired trope on at the last minute to spice it up. That said, I think the story otherwise did a good job of dodging common tropes in wife-sharing stories, especially that the husband wasn't portrayed as a wimp with a dick much smaller than the other man's.
I see a lot of potential in this, and even if I think a straight narration (rather than radio drama) would work better for me, I think the actors did a good job at not overacting, even through the intense parts.
Good luck with future stories!
