Secret Lovers.....Help MArriage?
- Thread starter SLAM
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I think your last line is your answer. If you feel it would hurt her marriage, could you truly enjoy the encounter? I'm not going to say whether it will improve her marriage or not. That's my own personal opinion. But if you feel uncomfortable, sometimes it is best to go with your instincts.
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I think it often depends whether it is purely a sex thing or the woman is looking for a greater involvement.
If it's purely sex, if no one finds out what harm does it do and it can sometimes take pressure of the marraige if either partner seeks satisfaction elsewhere because they are frustrated.
But then again guilt can sometimes lead to a confession and then the marraige can be destroyed.
If you want to play it safe then don't do it, but then life is a gamble.
If it's purely sex, if no one finds out what harm does it do and it can sometimes take pressure of the marraige if either partner seeks satisfaction elsewhere because they are frustrated.
But then again guilt can sometimes lead to a confession and then the marraige can be destroyed.
If you want to play it safe then don't do it, but then life is a gamble.
midas2001
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SLAM... go with your feelings bro'
Question... what makes you feel it would harm her marriage? I once had a relationship with a married lady that went on for years (and nobody knew!)
In a way... I think it helped her marriage believe it or not, because just every now and then we would meet and I guess it helped her thro' some difficult times with her husband by adding that little spark of life and spice.
So, only you can tell what any outcome could be!
Midas2001
Question... what makes you feel it would harm her marriage? I once had a relationship with a married lady that went on for years (and nobody knew!)
In a way... I think it helped her marriage believe it or not, because just every now and then we would meet and I guess it helped her thro' some difficult times with her husband by adding that little spark of life and spice.
So, only you can tell what any outcome could be!
Midas2001
hellion69
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Caution ahead!
When I was in a sexless marrage I went looking elsewhere for sex. All I wanted was sex. Everything else was o.k. I found a woman in a similar situation and we stated to see eachother. "No Strings Attatched". Her husband found out and gladly gave his blessing. One thing led to another and feelings started to crop up. Both marrages ended and we're living happily ever after... The moral is. If your fuckin'... It won't be long before your lovin'. Someone always loses when feelings are involved.
When I was in a sexless marrage I went looking elsewhere for sex. All I wanted was sex. Everything else was o.k. I found a woman in a similar situation and we stated to see eachother. "No Strings Attatched". Her husband found out and gladly gave his blessing. One thing led to another and feelings started to crop up. Both marrages ended and we're living happily ever after... The moral is. If your fuckin'... It won't be long before your lovin'. Someone always loses when feelings are involved.
midas2001
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Wise words........
hellion69......... it's definitely a possibilty
Prevailing circumstances do however have an effect.
Example.....
I have fallen heavily for a lady outside my marriage...okay! BUT... BUT... I also have a long standing (sexless) relationship already. The difference is that I have two beautiful daughters and there is no way (and I mean NO WAY) that I could ever hurt them... so, yes you're right that love creeps in... but I know that I have responsibilities that override my happiness!
There is a fine line between "Using" another person for your own needs... and then walking across the line and to taking them into your heart. Who of us knows where that line is...? The problem is... we don't know where that lines is - UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE !
Midas2001
hellion69......... it's definitely a possibilty
Prevailing circumstances do however have an effect.
Example.....
I have fallen heavily for a lady outside my marriage...okay! BUT... BUT... I also have a long standing (sexless) relationship already. The difference is that I have two beautiful daughters and there is no way (and I mean NO WAY) that I could ever hurt them... so, yes you're right that love creeps in... but I know that I have responsibilities that override my happiness!
There is a fine line between "Using" another person for your own needs... and then walking across the line and to taking them into your heart. Who of us knows where that line is...? The problem is... we don't know where that lines is - UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE !
Midas2001
Lady Damona
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my 2 cents
I am a married woman who has looked for sex outside of my marriage and found it. . .with and without emotional attachments. Whatever she decides is her decision, you can't make that for her. But, if you feel uncomfortable already, then don't do it. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. . .actually I commend you for thinking past the bedroom. I've never been able to do that.
I am a married woman who has looked for sex outside of my marriage and found it. . .with and without emotional attachments. Whatever she decides is her decision, you can't make that for her. But, if you feel uncomfortable already, then don't do it. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. . .actually I commend you for thinking past the bedroom. I've never been able to do that.
SamMalone
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Re: Wise words........
Midas.......
A question if you don't mind......obviously your marriage was not always sexless, you have two daughters.....what changes that takes the sex out of marriage....does someone lose their focus?
Just wondering if you know what caused it.
midas2001 said:
Midas.......
A question if you don't mind......obviously your marriage was not always sexless, you have two daughters.....what changes that takes the sex out of marriage....does someone lose their focus?
Just wondering if you know what caused it.
midas2001
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Re: Re: Wise words........
Very good question my friend and if you analyse things critically there are obviously several reasons.
But I guess you could boil all of them down to one single answer... whatever you try to do in this life to keep your sanity and happiness...
The world keeps getting in the way !
and eventually like a ship that is taking on water... there comes a point where you can't bail it out as quick as it comes in.
Midas2001
Hi there Sam...SamMalone said:
Midas.......
A question if you don't mind......obviously your marriage was not always sexless, you have two daughters.....what changes that takes the sex out of marriage....does someone lose their focus?
Just wondering if you know what caused it.
Very good question my friend and if you analyse things critically there are obviously several reasons.
But I guess you could boil all of them down to one single answer... whatever you try to do in this life to keep your sanity and happiness...
The world keeps getting in the way !
and eventually like a ship that is taking on water... there comes a point where you can't bail it out as quick as it comes in.
Midas2001
Secret Lovers...sometimes help!
I once (at least) was having a rough go of it with my wife and turned to a beautiful woman sevearl years older than me. I loved being with this woman but after several meetings I suddenly realized that I was not interested in losing my wife. I really feel that this "secret affair" really helped out and defininately spiced things up for quite some time.
Does that help?
I once (at least) was having a rough go of it with my wife and turned to a beautiful woman sevearl years older than me. I loved being with this woman but after several meetings I suddenly realized that I was not interested in losing my wife. I really feel that this "secret affair" really helped out and defininately spiced things up for quite some time.
Does that help?
