Safe Word

conservative1

Really Experienced
Joined
Jul 1, 2005
Posts
135
Safe words are established for a reason. I get that.
Wondering how many have had to use that word. What were the circumstances.
In my mind, I thinking I would never use it, because stretching your limits is one of the reasons we do things.
 
Safe words are established for a reason. I get that.
Wondering how many have had to use that word. What were the circumstances.
In my mind, I thinking I would never use it, because stretching your limits is one of the reasons we do things.
Whitby is my safe word
 
I safeworded once, but it was the slow down/stop for a minute and check in word, not stop everything. He stopped, we talked, he adjusted a bit, and we jumped back into the scene.
 
I have never used a safe word with my current partner. Since she knows me intimately and know exactly where my limits are through trial and error. But i have used it in the past. But it's many years ago. When i was still relatively new to the kink community. It was a very intense session, one of the first times with more than one partner and i was overwhelmed.
 
From the other side, I have had Yellow used by play partners a few times, always on first dates. In theory, negotiating limits solves the problem, but in practice, especially with inexperienced partners, people don't always know what works for them and what doesn't. Never more than once in a single scene though I don't think.

I have had Red used once. The spankee just didn't react well to my quite intense style - and had a very emotional reaction that necessitated stopping the scene. It was the right decision on her part - she had her back to me (her choice), I could not see her face or her eyes - and so the information available to me (to decide how things were going) was quite limited.

I require that any play partner agree, explicitly, to use their safewords if they need to. In my mind they are a critical tool in our consent framework, right up there with clearly articulated limits.
 
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