Sadness

[Guest]

. . . .

 

[Belegon]

Concert tonight - it went very well.

But before the event began our school resource officer pulled me aside to tell me that one of my students wouldn't be there. SRS had taken her out of the home earlier that day for neglect and abuse.

Her biggest worry? That she would miss the damn concert.

My biggest concern? That I never realized her situation.

Dirty clothes at times, certainly. Sporadic attendance as well.

Damn it, damn it, damn it.

I hope she's okay.

Your heart does you credit, dear... and it is no harm to wish you had noticed. But don't kill yourself over it, okay? That won't help anyone.

 

[JagFarlane]

Concert tonight - it went very well.

But before the event began our school resource officer pulled me aside to tell me that one of my students wouldn't be there. SRS had taken her out of the home earlier that day for neglect and abuse.

Her biggest worry? That she would miss the damn concert.

My biggest concern? That I never realized her situation.

Dirty clothes at times, certainly. Sporadic attendance as well.

Damn it, damn it, damn it.

I hope she's okay.

Mmmmm don't kill yourself over it hun. Dirty clothes...seen even kids from good families do that just cause they're teens.

Think of it this way...her biggest concern was missing the concert. That means you made a POSITIVE impact, one of which I am sure she appreciates

 

[rgraham666]

*HUGS* sweetie.

None of us is Sherlock Holmes, able to piece together a whole case from tiny clues.

The fact that you care is enough.

 

[shereads]

If I were in her position, I'd take some comfort from knowing you care. If she had asked for help, you'd have given it. She knows that too.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

And it isn't like you can concentrate on only a single classroom. You have hundreds of kids through the day in music so the available "quality" time is even more limited.

 

[OneLustyWench]

Sometimes, just knowing someone like you cares about her makes the world of difference.

 

[Guest]

. . . .

 

[tickledkitty]

*hugs*

 

[feeeriek]

 

[OneLustyWench]

Thank you, everyone.

Silly thing she is, worrying about the concert when her life is falling apart around her.

What happens with foster care, does anyone know? Will they take her there tonight or instead make her stay somewhere else like juvie?

As long as they have a foster family that can take her, she won't be in juvie as she was a victim not a perpetrator. But foster families range in care so school will be very important to her right now. Pride in what SHE can handle or excel in is needed right now to give balance.

Just treat her like you did. Evidently you made an impression before so keep that relationship.

 

[Guest]

. . . .

 

[OneLustyWench]

I don't know if I should let on that I know her situation.

She may not wish anyone to know.

Then again - well, hell. Concert attendance was a requirement for the kids in order for them to go with us on the all day music tour in a couple of weeks. I bitched at great length about this.

But of course she's coming with us - no question there - but now she'll know that I know why she missed.

Maybe that's okay.

I'll lose a bit of credibility with other students to allow her to go, as well.

They'll get over it, I think.

They'll get over it if you tell them to! As long as you don't change how you treat her, she'll be able to take pride in her accomplishments. That support you give with that pride can help a lot of hurt.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

I don't know about your students, but when I tell mine that "there are reasons that sometime you don't need to know . . . " they accept it without question and carry on, usually happily.

 

[Guest]

. . . .

 

[voluptuary_manque]

I just bare my teeth and refuse to answer.

Actually, the students know me very well.

No matter if I sputter and fume, they are not afraid.

Sigh, I guess it's the size difference and the "daddy noises" that make them quail when necessary. But they also know that daddy loves them.

 

[Guest]

. . . .

 

[JagFarlane]

Thank you, everyone.

Silly thing she is, worrying about the concert when her life is falling apart around her.

What happens with foster care, does anyone know? Will they take her there tonight or instead make her stay somewhere else like juvie?

Most likely...thats her reaction to clinging to the good thing in her life....

 

[Zeb_Carter]

Good wishes to her and you...

She will most likely be placed as fast as possible with a family member, Grandparents, an older sibling, cousin, etc. They will try to place her with someone she knows before popping her into a strange house.

If no grandparents or family is available she will be placed for the night in a shelter that most counties have for just this purpose. Then she will be placed in the foster system.

Hopefully a family member will come forward.

I hope this helps.

 

[Guest]

. . . .

 

[Gizzmotick]

Think of it this way...her biggest concern was missing the concert. That means you made a POSITIVE impact, one of which I am sure she appreciates

Indeed. Most kids know that life is falling apart around them when it's happening... and tha fact that she was more concernec about missing the concert says that she was focusing on the class as a positive thing to cling to... that speaks volumes for how comfortable she felt in your class.

Take heart in that. You can't spot all the signs every time. Sometimes dirty clothes and spotty attendance is due to rebellion, and sometimes due to life going to hell... there is no way to know.

 

[Liar]

Then again - well, hell. Concert attendance was a requirement for the kids in order for them to go with us on the all day music tour in a couple of weeks. I bitched at great length about this.

But of course she's coming with us - no question there - but now she'll know that I know why she missed.

Maybe that's okay.

I'll lose a bit of credibility with other students to allow her to go, as well.

They'll get over it, I think.

I think it should be no problem. Or are you saying that if a kid has worked hard to be in the concert and gets sick or breaks a leg on the actual day, that they'd be punished for that? This is perfectly equivalent.

 

[Vermilion]

You can always say to the other kids that she had a valid excuse for not attending and if any of them come to you with a similarly valid excuse then they, too, would get similarly lenient treatment. End of.

But i agree with everyone else. It seems like that concert was a good thing that she was clinging onto.

x
V

 

[Guest]

. . . .

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Caring is the liberal prescription for everything. It costs nothing, requires almost no investment of time or other resources, its never inconvenient, and you feel so warm & fuzzy about yourself when you've done it.