Robot Groundhog for Groundhog's Day?

[3113]

No, it's not a joke, although these two gents do a great job of joking about it. Here's the news article on the subject. Groundhog's day is such a wacky American tradition anyway, am I the only one who finds this whole discussion surreal?

However, I wouldn't worry too much about it happening, Groundhog fans. PETA rarely gets what it wants--though I suppose Disney's animatronics lab could whip up a Groundhog to replace Phil that might actually entertain the crowd, even sing and dance the answer to whether or not there'll be an early spring!

Hmmm. Maybe this ain't such a bad idea after all....

Oh, and Happy Groundhog's Day!

 

[Guest]

I do not care if the rodent is real or robotic, but he'd better not see his fucking shadow tomorrow morning if he knows what's good for him.

Just saying.

 

[Boxlicker101]

No, it's not a joke, although these two gents do a great job of joking about it. Here's the news article on the subject. Groundhog's day is such a wacky American tradition anyway, am I the only one who finds this whole discussion surreal?

However, I wouldn't worry too much about it happening, Groundhog fans. PETA rarely gets what it wants--though I suppose Disney's animatronics lab could whip up a Groundhog to replace Phil that might actually entertain the crowd, even sing and dance the answer to whether or not there'll be an early spring!

Hmmm. Maybe this ain't such a bad idea after all....

Oh, and Happy Groundhog's Day!

I find it hard to believe even PETA could be making such extreme fools of themselves.

 

[TE999]

I find it hard to believe even PETA could be making such extreme fools of themselves.

It's never stopped them before.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

It's never stopped them before.

Roger that! Given a choice between appearing as fools or as thundering idiots, PETA will always take the low road.

 

[3113]

Comeon, gents, is that all you can comment on? PETA? How predictable! We're taking robot groundhogs here. You call yourself writers? Let's have some real discussion on the possibilities. Like a groundhog transformer or one with lasers coming out of its eyes....

 

[TxRad]

Comeon, gents, is that all you can comment on? PETA? How predictable! We're taking robot groundhogs here. You call yourself writers? Let's have some real discussion on the possibilities. Like a groundhog transformer or one with lasers coming out of its eyes....

How about a robot groundhog that not only predicts the weather but controls it. Talk about your world domination.

 

[Weird Harold]

Roger that! Given a choice between appearing as fools or as thundering idiots, PETA will always take the low road.

Do you suppose there might be someway to get the WBC religious loonies and PETA's warm-fuzzy loonies to picket each other into extinction?

 

[Handley_Page]

Dateline Feb 2nd, 2020

In Pa, Robot Ground-hog George (successor to Punxsutawney Phil, the real one), emerged on time to do his thing by way of Prognostication. Unlike previous occasions at Gobbler's Knob, when his will was translated by a human, this time he had a voice.

And what a voice; it boomed out long and loud, telling everyone that winter has another six weeks to run. Some of the smaller children were quite disturbed by the sound. What increased the panic was when George predicted tidal waves battering the east coast, and causing severe damage to the great lakes as wind and wave worked in opposition. The Delaware estuary would flood to 'a depth several feet'. House prices immediately fell by 20% on receipt of the news and many fuel stations ran out of gas in the panic to get out.

The local Army base was put on immediate standby.

By the time his laser eyes were fully on, there was severe panic in the park and bits of burnt branches fell onto the fleeing audience. Several small fires, including cars, were started and it took the local Fire Department several hours to get to the site owing to the traffic and general chaos. It is reported that several protesters, who had been conveniently placed near the TV vans, had their placards ('God hates Robots') burned to a crisp (some people later said it was the best thing that George could have done).

It took technicians some while to bring George under control, but the damage was done. Insurance companies have so far refused to pay out (quoting "Act of God"). The Park authorities are said to be planning to sue PETA and the builders of the Robot ground-hog and are talking to their lawyers.

The Mayor has issued a statement saying that next year "We'll have a real ground-hog."

~

 

[Tio_Narratore]

See what happens when monotheistic religion is abandoned for animalistic secularism! After all, today is Candlemas, and, as the old rhyme goes, "If Candlemas be fair and bright, six weeks more Winter are in sight." Fair and bright weather conditions would accompany a high pressure system of colder Arctic air, and thus portend more winter. And let groundhogs see their shadows.

But God and State were separated in the former British colonies, and meteorology became a State perogative. Out with God in His heavens, then, and in with Groundhogs under the Earth (Clearly Satanic, eh what? and 'hogs' as well - the defiled animals of Hebraic Dietary Law). And now robot groundhogs, no less, technology taking over where nature leaves off. Is this no more than a pagan portent of the imminent appearance of de Chardin's noosphere? What blasphemy next in the name of climate?

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Do you suppose there might be someway to get the WBC religious loonies and PETA's warm-fuzzy loonies to picket each other into extinction?

Damn, Harold! What a concept and (just thinkin') what a plot bunny . . .

 

[DesertPirate]

I wish PETA would go back to People Eating Tasty Animals.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Well, the abused slave of Wall Street has predicted six more weeks of winter.

 

[3113]

How about a robot groundhog that not only predicts the weather but controls it. Talk about your world domination.

See! Now we're talking! Brilliant idea. It would make Groundhog day into a world event as the robot appears only once a year to let the whole world know what the weather would be like (under the robot's control) for that year.

By the time his laser eyes were fully on, there was severe panic in the park and bits of burnt branches fell onto the fleeing audience.

Bravo!

Inspired! You see how much more fun a robot groundhog is compared to a real one?

But God and State were separated in the former British colonies, and meteorology became a State perogative. Out with God in His heavens, then, and in with Groundhogs under the Earth (Clearly Satanic, eh what?)

OMG! I never thought of it that way! It is pagan secularism! These people hate Candlemas! Next time someone says "Happy Groundhog's day to me, I'm gonna say, "Happy Candlemas!" and force them to acknowledge it. If they work for a store, I'm going to boycott that store until everyone in it says "Happy Candlemas." Damn PC humanists!

Well, the abusede slave of Wall Street has predicted six more weeks of winter.

See? The groundhog gets so traumatized by the crowds that he ends up making us suffer for it with unhappy news. A robot would follow the Asimov's three laws, including the one where you do humans no harm. So it would predict an early spring to make us happy

 

[R. Richard]

Can't you people see the obvious? The robot ground hog SkyNet will attempt to take over the world! When John Connor attempts to fight back, the SkyNet will send the Terminator! (Go ahead and laugh, but I predict that the Terminator will not only arrive, but he will become the Governor of California.)

 

[Handley_Page]

Can't you people see the obvious? The robot ground hog SkyNet will attempt to take over the world! When John Connor attempts to fight back, the SkyNet will send the Terminator! (Go ahead and laugh, but I predict that the Terminator will not only arrive, but he will become the Governor of California.)

As long as he STAYS there, I don't have a problem!

 

[SeaCat]

Sheesh and to think.

When I was growing up Ground Hogs were considered a nuisance.

We were paid five cents per by the farmers and were allowed to hunt them in the empty fields to our hearts content.

They made useful pop up targets.

Cat

 

[Handley_Page]

============

 

[Handley_Page]

That raises an interesting question. What the 'ell is it ?
Don't bother; I've discovered a Woodchuck.

 

[3113]

That raises an interesting question. What the 'ell is it ?
Don't bother; I've discovered a Woodchuck.

A cute woodchuck!

 

[Handley_Page]

A cute woodchuck!

big, innit ?

 

[Boxlicker101]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Handley_Page
That raises an interesting question. What the 'ell is it ?
Don't bother; I've discovered a Woodchuck.

A cute woodchuck!

But, this just raises another, even more important question: How much wood would the woodchuck chuck, if the woodchuck would chuck wood?

 

[voluptuary_manque]

A cute woodchuck!

A cuter woodchuck!

Woodchuck au Vin


Published: June 5, 2008
The gardener who created this dish notes that the herbs and vegetables in this recipe are available fresh from the garden because they have not been eaten by the dish’s main ingredient.




Time: 1 hour and 15 minutes

2 to 3 tablespoons olive oil

1 woodchuck, dressed and cleaned of scent glands, boned and cut into strips or bite-size chunks (see note)

2 shallots, chopped

2 large carrots, cut into 1/2-inch dice

1 clove garlic, minced

1 cup beef stock or water

2 cups dry red wine

3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons white vermouth

2 teaspoons coarsely ground black pepper

1/4 teaspoon dried thyme

1 fresh or dried bay leaf

2 tablespoons chopped fresh rosemary

1 1/2 cups pitted Cerignola olives, very coarsely chopped

2 to 3 tablespoons flour

Chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley

Salt.

1. Place a Dutch oven over medium-high heat for 1 minute. Add olive oil. When the oil is hot, add woodchuck meat and sauté until lightly browned on all sides. Transfer to a plate and set aside.

2. Add shallots and carrots to pan and sauté until lightly browned. Add garlic and sauté for 1 minute. Add stock or water, red wine and 3/4 cup of vermouth. Stir with a wooden spoon, scraping bottom of the pan. Return meat to pan, and add pepper, thyme, bay leaf, and 1 tablespoon of the rosemary. Cover, reduce heat to low, and simmer for 20 minutes.

3. Add olives and remaining 1 tablespoon rosemary. Cover and simmer, stirring occasionally, until meat is tender, about 45 minutes.

4. Discard bay leaf. Raise heat and boil uncovered until liquid is slightly reduced. In a small bowl, mix remaining 2 tablespoons vermouth with enough flour to make a soupy paste. Thicken sauce to taste by adding paste a tablespoon at a time, simmering for a minute after each addition; all of the paste may not be needed. Stir in parsley, and season with salt if needed. If desired, serve over rice or egg noodles, or with boiled potatoes.

Yield: 3 to 6 servings, depending on size of woodchuck and squeamishness of guests.

Note: A woodchuck has small scent glands under the forearms and in the small of the back that must be removed. The insulating fat under the skin should also be removed. A dressed woodchuck does not require soaking, though many people recommend soaking overnight in salted water. As with all game, the meat of older animals is tougher and has a stronger, gamier flavor than a young animal. This recipe may also be made with the boned meat of one large or two small rabbits.

 

[3113]

big, innit ?

That's Phil, himself, having gone to seed in his life of luxury. A robot woodchuck would not only be able to chuck wood, but would keep groundhogs like Phil out in nature where they belong and could stay svelte.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

That's Phil, himself, having gone to seed in his life of luxury. A robot woodchuck would not only be able to chuck wood, but would keep groundhogs like Phil out in nature where they belong and could stay svelte.

Spoken like a true California primate. What makes you think that groundhogs want to be svelte? Come autumn, a 'chuck no more wants to be thin than they want to be hungry. Fat = happy, if you're a rodent.