Riven's "Lunch with Max"

[Whispersecret]

This story was incredible. On Whispersecret's moist panties scale, it rates "soaked".

If you're at all curious about dominance and submission, read this story. Very informational as well as arousing. The pace was good and left me wanting more. A lot more.

Riven, I forgot to mention in my email that I have some editorial comments, but I won't put them forth if you'd prefer not to hear them.

In the meantime, get back to the computer and write, baby!

 

[Guest]

To Whispersecret,
Thankyou for the kind comments.

Feel free to post any suggestions you like, a little criticism never hurt anyone. I know when I re-read it there were one or two shifts in tense <sigh> but I'll be damned if I picked them up until after it was posted - then they stood out like a sore thumb!

You asked in your e-mail was I writing anything more. I hadn't intended to, but if this story is well recieved my ego will no doubt see me trying again.
Thanks again <Riven>

 

[Sman]

Riven:

I was riveted by your story. It was well written and well developed. I, too, was chomping at the bit for some more in this story; a sequel would be very welcome.

By all means, keep this story going.

Sman